Little Brats

A quick smack and the dreaded "Wait 'till your father gets home" 


Without it, I'd be in prison or dead.


Dogs here are quiet because if they make too much noise they'll be noticed and eaten.

Darwin's theory.

Maybe kids too.

Canada (at least Ontario and Quebec - can't speak for the other provinces) has taken discipline out of parents' hands.  If the kids aren't happy with the discipline method - whether it's beating or grounding or whatever, they just have to call child services.  The kids know that their parents have little power.  The kids get their own lawyers if it comes to that. Guess whose tax dollars pay for the lawyers?

And, yeah, Babala - kids in stores.  I worked as a cashier at a WalMart for a couple of years - in the States, not Canada, but I don't think there's much difference.  Candy is placed at the checkouts at kid-eye level for a reason.  Interesting to watch how different parents handled the situation when kids begged, asked for, or demanded a treat.  My solution as a parent was to give my kids their own spending money, via an allowance some of which was earned through doing household chores.  If they wanted something badly enough, they could spend their own money on it.  Amazing how quickly the 'need' for something disappeared if one's own cash were needed rather than Mom's.

I worked for 3 years doing children's photography. I saw all kinds of behaviour.

Some kids are bratty and it seems they lacked discipline. Some kids are just having a bad day. Some kids are little angels, but I guess they aren't like that all the time.

..... Some kids are little angels, but I guess they aren't like that all the time.

My son was generally very well-behaved when he was out.  Home   could be a whole other issue.

There is no such thing as the perfect child (how boring would that kid be?). All kids have their good and bad days. It's the degree that some kids are going to now that shocks me. A child throws a temper tantrum, no surprise there but when you see a child hitting their parent and swearing at them at the age of 5??? 


When I moved to Taizhou, I rented an apartment from this lady. I didn't like her to begin with as she acted like I had been brought up in hut and she kept pointing out how lucky I was to be able to live in her apartment (the one I liked the least in all of my time in China). She had a son who was about 5. She came over with her mother and her son to sign the lease. Her son went into one of drawers and grabbed a pair of scissors and proceeded to hack up myhouse plant. The grandmother asked him to give the scissors back and he told her NO! She smiled at me and told me he didn't want to. I walked over and grabbed the scissors from him. He then started knocking down all my DVD's. Again I walked over and told him no. When he found a lighter and started over to some papers. I told the landlord that this meeting was over. I told my HR girl to inform the landlord that while I was paying rent for the place, she was NOT coming to the apartment with her son (she had taken to dropping by with him). The HR girl had the landlord come to the center to finish business. She of course brought grandma and her son. It was a brand new center and they were just finishing building it. He son found a tool on the floor and hacked chips out of the new door. The center director was real angry and he complained to the mother. Her response was "It wasn't him, he's a good boy". 

I like embarrassing the little c^&ts. I make em cry and stand outside the class to be watched by everyone waiting for their kids.

Do they discipline the girls more severly then the treasured boys?

I don't think so. It seems to me that the boys got punished just as hard, if not harder, than the girls. I think sometimes the expectations for boys may be higher, which means that there's much more room for failure. Also, girls can, and often do, fall back on marriage if they don't have any particular academic talent or job skills. So the stakes are often higher for boys.

Also keep in mind that most of these kids are only children, as its still one-child China for most city parents. I've seen just as many spoiled princesses as I have little emperors. Unless you're deep in the countryside I don't really see a huge difference in the way boy and girl children are treated.

I don't really see a huge difference in the way boy and girl children are treated.

But there really is a big difference in how they behave....especially at School!

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I don't really see a huge difference in the way boy and girl children are treated.

But there really is a big difference in how they behave....especially at School!

That I agree with! But I think, to be honest, that for the most part its the same way back home. A big generalization, of course, but I remember as a kid in school the boys were always up to much more mischief than the girls. Not that the girls didn't get into trouble, but it wasn't usually of the "disrupt the whole class" type.

Although this year one of my Gao 1 classes has a few girls who are like something off of a Maury Povich "Out of Control Teens" show. They are so bad, especially compared to how female Chinese students usually behave. Their parents would be mortified.

Yeah, we'll what about teens? I've heard they can act pretty bratty too.

Quote from: LaowaiSaosao on March 13, 2009, 09:41:52 PM

Yeah, I agree on the punishment here being way more brutal than back home. We took our 5-yr old son to a kindergarten tae-kwon-doh competition and one of the coaches was hitting her charges around the head and chest when they didn't perform well.

i think a big problem here is the skewed ratio of children to adults - two (sometimes even four) grandparents, two parents, one nanny, all focused on just one little darling - no wonder they are spoilt! All the taitais (grannies) in our compound fuss over our son and tell our nanny to stop him doing things like running, climbing, jumping (things that are perfectly normal and fairly safe for a 2 year old) in case he hurts himself - and when their charges fall over they run to pick them up, whereas my kids have to pick themselves up (of course if they don't we do, but we give them a chance to get up before we get involved). The taitais are also amazed by how advanced, physically, our 2-year old is, and I tell them that he learns from his big brother, something their charges don't. Pretty much every day I have reason to think the one-child policy, while wonderful in terms of economic development, sucks for families.

I agree with this. My husband often comments that if we were raising our son back in the village he'd be beaten for doing half the stuff he does (he's one and a half!). I think lots of kids are just plain scared of their parents, and so that's why you don't see them act up so much in their parents' presence. I've seen some parents behave awfully towards their kids, especially when I ran my school. I often felt like I had to defend the kids, the parents were so hard on them "my son is so stupid," or "my daughter is worthless and lazy."

hi! i'm new so i thought i'd read around. it's really cool reading about all this stuff that goes down in china. i would have no idea really unless i was hearing individual stories like these; nothing you could read in the paper.

now for my thoughts    : these parents...in china...held back by this "oppressive" law that for economical reasons restricts them to having only child a.k.a. one chance to carry on their name. I can see why it could be kick and scream stressful. so what'll it be: Severe beatings? or Apathy?  I think for some people allowing ONE child is too many.

Give them half instead. Remove its language capabilities. And finally...put fur on it.

You wouldn't allow them to have a cat? 

Some people can barely care for themselves...

They don't look at animals the same way. Pets are not necessary, so why feed them or send them to a vet? If they die, well, there are plenty more where they come from. Put them in the curry.

Kids are their future, so they have to beat them into shape.

Our way has resulted in one set of problems for the younger generation, their way, a different set.

Same depth of shit. Different bull.

I heard tell of a study (the best stats never come to you with a proper source) that the ideal parenting consists of a ratio of positive to negative comments at 5:1. 

I'd agree that kids need both for motivation, praise to build their confidence and faith, criticism to correct faults and steer their own progress.  I like that ratio.