Things I Just Won't Do For Work

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Raoul F. Duke

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Things I Just Won't Do For Work
« on: May 21, 2007, 03:48:23 AM »
Off work, this list is a lot shorter.  afafafafaf

I've been interviewing a lot lately- going from freelancing back to a steadier full-time gig I hope- and am freshly stunned by the litany of unreasonable and unconscionable things schools here try to slip past us. It got me to thinking, and I came up with the following list. Add to it if ya got one!

Things I Won't Do For A School

1. Allow my passport/residence permit/work permit/etc. to be held hostage by the school or recruiter. These docs stay in my possession at all times except as needed for necessary legal processes, such as renewing a residence permit. If they're not released to me in a timely manner, I stop teaching and immediately call my Consulate. This passport-holding practice is The Big One...probably the single stupidest thing you can possibly allow to happen in a job here. Never, ever let anyone do this.

2. Accept a probation period at lower pay. I understand that a new job is conditional and may be terminated if the employer isn't happy. If you don't like me, FIRE me...but don't steal from me for 3 months in the process.

3. Change grades, unless clear evidence of error or very special circumstance can be shown. I calls 'em the way I sees 'em. If the school wants to change my grades, I probably can't stop them. However, I will not legitimize this process by doing it for them.

4. Knuckle under when presented with an attempt to force a contract change, or blatant failure to perform the contract by the employer. I'm a reasonable guy. I'll work with you. I understand that things are a little late sometimes. I at least try to not sweat the small stuff too much...I won't punt a job just because I never get the free Chinese lessons in my contract. But I will not allow anyone to outright give me the ol' switcheroo on any significant part of our agreement...pay, allowances, and major benefits. I'm no one's bitch, and I'm not gonna let myself get slapped like one. If I'm still working there, I will quit. There's a zillion other jobs out there. If the contract is ending, I will raise all kinds of hell. I will always do everything in my reach to make it easier to abide by our agreement, than to break it.

5. Allow my home, telephone number, or free time to be unreasonably opened up to students or school activities without my consent. Some schools simply assume that you'll be delighted to be on 24/7 duty to teach emergency classes, promote the school, hang out with the kids, field all manner of calls to your home or mobile phones...you name it. When it happens, this nonsense needs to be brought to an immediate screeching halt. My space and my phone money and my free time are MINE, dammit. I am intensely jealous of them. I understand that some presence at school events, with proper notice, just comes with the territory. I don't mind, if it's reasonable. Some allowance for making yourself available to students is DEFINITELY reasonable. Sometimes I genuinely enjoy socializing with students...but this will be MY choice, not the school's. However, when presented with a surprise I find intrusive, I'm as blunt as I have to be about saying 'No'. And a couple of schools have released my phone numbers to masses of students without my consent (which I would never give anyway); when this happens I turn so ugly that the school quickly backs down and tells students not to call me. If I want you to have my phone number, I'll give it to you myself. A number of students I genuinely consider friends DO have my phone numbers.
The Chinese inability to understand the concepts of "privacy" and "personal space" is simply not my responsibility.

6. Teach weekend mornings. Everyone has their personal quirks; this one is mine. If you aren't naked, female, and friendly, I don't want to know about you before at least noon on the weekends. I KNOW some students want weekend morning classes. People in Hell want ice water, too.

7. Let a private school farm me out to public school classes, or other classes that don't fit my basic job description. Another personal choice. If I want to teach upper middle school, I'll go work at an upper middle school...without another entity taking a cut of my salary for it. However, I don't want to teach upper middle school; at that age I'd rather shoot 'em than look at 'em.  bababababa If I go to work for a school, I want to work for that school...not a recruiter in school's clothing. I know one poor devil at a school that got farmed out to a...horrors!...KIDS CASTLE!!!  aoaoaoaoao aaaaaaaaaa asasasasas

8. Let a school withdraw and hold various "deposits" from my salary. One school I just interviewed with- and ran away from screaming- tries this. So do others. If you read the fine print you'll realize that they will be keeping out several thousand RMB of your salary over the first few months. No. I'll pay housing and utility deposits, within reason, just as I would anywhere else, but I won't work for a place that withholds my money from me as a means of control and/or stealing. No can do.

OK, all I can think of for now. I'm sure others will come up...
« Last Edit: May 21, 2007, 08:07:48 PM by Raoul Duke »
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AMonk

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Re: Things I Just Won't Do For Work
« Reply #1 on: May 21, 2007, 08:22:51 PM »
I like your list.  My personal bugbear would be shared accomodation.  A room/suite for me (and Hubby) within an apartment is O-U-T. 
Moderation....in most things...

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Raoul F. Duke

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Re: Things I Just Won't Do For Work
« Reply #2 on: May 22, 2007, 04:51:59 AM »
I thought about putting shared accommodation on as a "Yellow Light".

The reason I didn't is that for some people, especially absolute newcomers, having a roommate is almost a benefit. With the right roommate, it gives one a built-in social network/partner in crime/coping assistant. It can make acclimation a bit easier. It can be a good thing.

Ladies seem to fare better with this than men do. Unfortunately, most men get paired up with big ol' ugly hairy nasty whiny naked drunk guys,like George, uuuuuuuuuu who stay drunk constantly; rant for hours about black helicopters and the Kennedy assassination when they finally cease their endless complaining about China, the city, and the school; puke all over the TV; have an unending stream of low-end prostitutes move in with them; constantly belch and fart like a dyspeptic camel, etc. etc. etc.

Personally, I wouldn't stand for a roommate who isn't a lover. I wouldn't take a job that won't provide a private apartment. But I can't say this for everyone...sometimes it does work.

If you DON'T want a roommate, watch out for words like "private bedroom" in job ads. "Private bedroom" = "shared rest of the apartment" = "uncaring cheap-ass bastard of a school owner". Do be sure and ask about this point when checking and negotiating with a school.
« Last Edit: May 22, 2007, 05:05:20 AM by Raoul Duke »
"Vicodin and dumplings...it's a great combination!" (Anthony Bourdain, in Harbin)

"Here in China we aren't just teaching...
we're building the corrupt, incompetent, baijiu-swilling buttheads of tomorrow!" (Raoul F. Duke)

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Stil

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Re: Things I Just Won't Do For Work
« Reply #3 on: May 22, 2007, 05:29:11 AM »
I don't do curfews. Some schools especially Middle schools and all girls schools close up tight as a drum at 10 or 11 and expect all their teachers to adhere to this curfew. M'kay that! I want to make sure i can wake a guard up at 3 in the morning. If there is no buzzer then i want a phone number. (gifts to guards keep them happy especially booze and smokes) I also expect to have anybody i want stay with me in my home. If i am having family or friend stay over for an extended period, I'll inform the school but only as a curtusy. Not for permission. I also don't let the school keep a key to my flat. If I think they have one, I change the locks. I'll choose who has access.

Unfortunately, most men get paired up with big ol' ugly hairy nasty whiny naked drunk guys,like George, uuuuuuuuuu

George isn't whiny.

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Raoul F. Duke

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Re: Things I Just Won't Do For Work
« Reply #4 on: May 22, 2007, 05:38:02 AM »
Great catch, Stil. I won't do curfews either. NO ONE should allow an employer this degree of control over their personal lives.

George isn't whiny.
I've been agreeing with ya a lot, dude, but I know better on this one.  uuuuuuuuuu
"Vicodin and dumplings...it's a great combination!" (Anthony Bourdain, in Harbin)

"Here in China we aren't just teaching...
we're building the corrupt, incompetent, baijiu-swilling buttheads of tomorrow!" (Raoul F. Duke)

Re: Things I Just Won't Do For Work
« Reply #5 on: May 22, 2007, 07:40:43 AM »
A lot of good points. Hmmm..ten things I won't do for work...w
1. Work for EF.
2. Work for EF.
and so on.
Number nine would be something like not wrestle Komodo dragons in the nude...no, wait...I would probably do that before working for EF again.
"Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination." Oscar Wilde.

"It's all oojah cum spiffy". Bertie Wooster.
"The stars are God's daisy chain" Madeleine Bassett.

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George

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Re: Things I Just Won't Do For Work
« Reply #6 on: May 22, 2007, 10:17:16 AM »


George isn't whiny.
I've been agreeing with ya a lot, dude, but I know better on this one.  uuuuuuuuuu

Would you mongrel bastards lay off me!! I got a headache!!....and get back on topic!!!!
 bibibibibi
The higher they fly, the fewer!    http://neilson.aminus3.com/

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Stil

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Re: Things I Just Won't Do For Work
« Reply #7 on: May 22, 2007, 01:49:19 PM »


George isn't whiny.
I've been agreeing with ya a lot, dude, but I know better on this one.  uuuuuuuuuu

Would you mongrel bastards lay off me!! I got a headache!!....and get back on topic!!!!
 bibibibibi

I stand corrected.

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George

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Re: Things I Just Won't Do For Work
« Reply #8 on: May 22, 2007, 01:53:42 PM »
 bbbbbbbbbb
The higher they fly, the fewer!    http://neilson.aminus3.com/

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Lotus Eater

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Re: Things I Just Won't Do For Work
« Reply #9 on: May 22, 2007, 05:04:52 PM »
I don't want an assistant in my classes. If the students need explanations, then we need to work it through together, not have someone come in and take over - giving an explanation I don't understand.  I'd rather take it slowly and make certain I know the explanation is what I want the students to understand - not someone's else's idea in a  quick and easy way.

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BamBam

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Re: Things I Just Won't Do For Work
« Reply #10 on: May 22, 2007, 05:43:00 PM »
I'm with you.  Without a translator, the students learn to listen closely, make inferences, and ask for further explanation if they don't understand.  With a translator, they don't even try to listen.  They just look over to the assistant for a translation that may or may not be what I am trying to teach.
Those that think they can, and those that think they can\'t are both right.

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Eagle

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Re: Things I Just Won't Do For Work
« Reply #11 on: May 22, 2007, 07:52:42 PM »
I won't have an assistant teacher.
I won't share an apartment with anyone other than the missus - anyone!
I won't be farmed out to other schools.
I won't be working more than five days a week. (Must have a two-day break)
I won't work for less than anyone else is making, in fact expect (and get) more.
I won't allow my contract to be fiddled with to my disadvantage.

If any thing happens which pisses me off - I have a nice place called HOME to return to and a nice pension to make living at home comfortable.  In my position it is easy enough to say "M'kay it"! and walk away.
“… whatever reality may be, it will to some extent be shaped by the lens
through which we see it.” (James Hollis)

Re: Things I Just Won't Do For Work
« Reply #12 on: May 23, 2007, 02:05:34 AM »
I won't use New Concept English to teach.  It's  bqbqbqbqbq

I won't sign anything written in Hanzi without a Chinese friend to read it for me.

I won't drink aaaaaaaaaa baijiu at a school function.  Try and make me.
And there is no liar like the indignant man... -Nietszche

Nothing is so fatiguing as the eternal hanging on of an uncompleted task. -William James

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Eagle

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Re: Things I Just Won't Do For Work
« Reply #13 on: May 23, 2007, 03:51:01 AM »
Good heavens - eating and drinking are another matter entirely.  What's the worst that could happen other than barf all over the uni president or some such bigwig.  You gotta do what you gotta do. 
“… whatever reality may be, it will to some extent be shaped by the lens
through which we see it.” (James Hollis)

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gonzo

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Re: Things I Just Won't Do For Work
« Reply #14 on: May 23, 2007, 09:55:19 AM »
NO FREAKING ENGLISH CORNERS asasasasas
« Last Edit: May 23, 2007, 07:25:19 PM by Raoul Duke »
RIP Phil Stephens.
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