What actually happened...
Train
K train to GZ - to the tune of the urine whistle and the buzz snore.
What I want to know, if that curbside training all children get, to urinate on whistled command, if it really works why does it take so long, the whistled command to tinkle now just goes on and on, and, frankly, if it genuinely did work, why, when some old lady starts with the tuneless peep, why doesn't everyone in the street clutch their forks and look for a place to pee too? I think if you hang a child over the gutter (or the hole in the cupboard floor that is the train toilet cabinet) and whistle long enough, eventually it will piss anyway.
And lordy, did ear plugs come in handy. The guy in the next bunk was an accomplished snorer, never quite choking himself, and never stopping, and indeed sometimes issuing a genuine "pretend pig" oink such as a child might make. Though my ears were well and truly blocked, and I did discover you can sleep quite handily with them stuffed in, I still heard him.
Taxi
Anyway... train arrived GZ late and I went for a taxi rather than try my luck on the metro even though the entryway was right there. Taxi ride was 20 yuan and took a few minutes. I arrived an hour ahead of my appointed meeting time, and went looking for breakfast instead.
Feets
The actual appointment in the consulate was an adventure in its own right. I decided what the hell and went in early to get a jump on things. Had to show my passport to get inside. had to use a special magic card to make the elevator open at the right floor. Had to drink some of my water in front of the security people before I could get inside. And when I did meet the counter staff, they started fretting over the passport photos I'd provided: head size too big and overall too dark in the face. Inasmuch as I did have three hours to kill, I said, fine, whatever, I will trot off to the studio you recommend and get some new pics taken. Thus I went walking.
GZ, or at least the part around the consulates has that weird Japanese (I think) foot traffic management system where at intersections you have to wait until the walking light goes green for everyone and you can walk wherever across the intersections, even diagonally. But it does mean a longer wait for the right to walk. So anyway I stomped around a while, found the photo place (and decided I'd also found the path to the metro station because I'd been studying maps before and knew the street names), got a photo taken and then watched as the Photoshop lady went to work. She removed some of the perspiration from my forehead, the hot day's redness from my nose and cheeks, and the tiny spots of incipient stubble left by overnighting on the train with no razor; and she edited out the shadows in the background. All of which, as far as I am aware, is very unsuitable for a passport photo which is supposed not to be digitally altered at all.... but this was the place recommended by the consular staff and Australian Post (one of the recommended ways to get passport photos in Oz) had pooched the originals so whatev. I stomped back. Handed over the photos. Deal done. Time to go home.
Metro
I'm looking at a map now and I see what went wrong. I was on Huacheng Rd (as opposed to Huacheng Ave) expecting to find an intersection with Huaxia Rd and go north to find the B1 entrance to the Zhujiang New City metro station. That would work very well if I were strolling Huali instead. Going north along Huaxi from Huacheng Rd actually takes me away from the metro station, not toward it. Luckily, it was hot and I got to a large roundabout and decided that somehow I'd read the map wrong. i turned around, walked back, and to my surprise happened in short order upon the A1 entrance to the metro.
Once underground, it's basically impossible to get lost. the whole place is as spacious as an airport terminal but there are obvious signs everywhere, in both English and Chinese. I knew I was looking for Line 3, so I just went where the signs pointed. In a large underground hall there were giant box that looked like some combination of a poker machine and an oversized ATM with a TV screen about belly height. These were the ticket machines. I approached one warily.
The ticket machines are halfway intuitive. At first you touch a map, but then you have to touch a line, and no amount of touching the actual lines representing the metro lines would do the trick. (You have to touch the line menu at the bottom). I was able to touch a destination on another line and nominate some combination of something, I can't remember what, but it asked me for money so I decided, Achievement Unlocked, and paid up anyway. For six yuan I received a filthy green token and a unhelpful number of 1 yuan coins in change.
Finding the right platform and the right car was just as easy - follow the signage, and wait - and the car turned up promptly. And good lord, if that's what it's like at 11am on a Thursday, rush hour must be hellish. The car was standing room only, but I didn't have to touch too many people and large numbers of people disembarked at the next station, and again at the station after that. The cars have both announcements and graphical indicators of progress so getting off at the transfer station was a breeze. Likewise, finding the other line was easy. All went well. About the only hiccup was at the Guangzhou South Train Station station. The exit signage there is very unhelpful. No obvious indication of which exit into the train station is best. I picked one and gazed about with everyone else as best I could. Luckily, train stations are sort of obvious anyway: find the security check in line (where you show your ticket and get it stamped and then can go upstairs for the x-rays, the wands, the stepping through the metal detectors, and on to the waiting rooms).
Owing to screwing around with passport photos and getting mildly lost that one time, I arrived with about ten minutes to spare for the train. No lunch for this little traveller. Belly was growling by the time I got "home". Take a packed lunch, kiddies.
Postscript:
Travelling on a Foreign Expert Certificate: entirely do-able. Both the normal train staff and the high-speed train staff accepted the booklet without question. No need to show my passport anywhere.
Also, I saw my first tattooed lady. Guangzhou, or at least the metro and train stations there, seem to have a lot more tattooed people than anywhere else I've been. This one young woman had a reasonably complete vambrace piece (forearm) and something about the greaves area (lower leg). Attractive young woman, dark and ugly tattoo work. Big splotchy thing, not like something she, seems to me, would have chosen for herself. then again, who knows. She seemed fine walking around with it all on display. Maybe I need to get out more.