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Author Topic: Your worst advice in 2 sentences or less.  (Read 17961 times)

KeyserSoze

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Re: Your worst advice in 2 sentences or less.
« Reply #15 on: January 08, 2012, 01:41:10 PM »
Because 5 RMB per dollar is an excellent exchange rate, you should exchange ALL your dollars at your local airport before you leave!

Bring all your guns and ammo (preferably a loud-as-hell cannon like a .44 magnum) and be prepared to demonstrate some target shooting as soon as you unpack your suitcase because the Chinese people love guns but rarely see them except in the movies.
« Last Edit: January 08, 2012, 07:18:16 PM by KeyserSoze »

decurso

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Re: Your worst advice in 2 sentences or less.
« Reply #16 on: January 08, 2012, 09:50:49 PM »
Just kiss her and see what happens...

El Macho

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Re: Your worst advice in 2 sentences or less.
« Reply #17 on: January 09, 2012, 12:15:10 AM »
You don't need to ask; there's no way that you'll have to work nights and weekends. After all, China has a five day workweek!

zero

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Re: Your worst advice in 2 sentences or less.
« Reply #18 on: January 09, 2012, 01:20:10 AM »
A few years teaching English in China will be a huge resume booster, because it shows that you have coping and communication abilities, which is really what major firms are looking for, especially when combined with a liberal arts degree. They'll hire you for your soft skills and then train your for the specific position.

Fozzwaldus

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Re: Your worst advice in 2 sentences or less.
« Reply #19 on: January 09, 2012, 05:05:04 AM »
A few years teaching English in China will be a huge resume booster, because it shows that you have coping and communication abilities, which is really what major firms are looking for, especially when combined with a liberal arts degree. They'll hire you for your soft skills and then train your for the specific position.

 ahahahahah ahahahahah ahahahahah
两只老外, 两只老外,跑得快,跑得快,
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El Macho

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Re: Your worst advice in 2 sentences or less.
« Reply #20 on: January 09, 2012, 05:59:30 AM »
zero wins.

Escaped Lunatic

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Re: Your worst advice in 2 sentences or less.
« Reply #21 on: January 09, 2012, 06:48:31 AM »
Always pay for a taxi with a 100 RMB note since taxi rivers always give you good, clean fresh (and non-counterfeit) notes as change.  Also, don't worry if the driver wants to take the beltway all the way around town since he knows now much money you'll save while not being stuck in traffic.
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Raoul F. Duke

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Re: Your worst advice in 2 sentences or less.
« Reply #22 on: January 09, 2012, 08:11:24 AM »
bkbkbkbkbk bkbkbkbkbk bkbkbkbkbk


If you want to impress Chinese girls, then dress shabbily, appear to be poor, and either write poetry or paint abstract paintings. The babes will flock around like geese.
"Vicodin and dumplings...it's a great combination!" (Anthony Bourdain, in Harbin)

"Here in China we aren't just teaching...
we're building the corrupt, incompetent, baijiu-swilling buttheads of tomorrow!" (Raoul F. Duke)

Escaped Lunatic

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Re: Your worst advice in 2 sentences or less.
« Reply #23 on: January 10, 2012, 01:56:21 AM »
Impress your Chinese friends by sharing the very best of western culture.  The next time you are out to lunch or dinner with them at a Chinese restaurant, surprise them by handing out plastic forks and knives to everyone at the table, and make sure to lecture them on how much better these are than chopsticks.
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decurso

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Re: Your worst advice in 2 sentences or less.
« Reply #24 on: January 10, 2012, 02:28:50 AM »
Just tell her the truth...

Escaped Lunatic

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Re: Your worst advice in 2 sentences or less.
« Reply #25 on: January 10, 2012, 05:03:05 AM »
Just tell her the truth...

Especially about how you find her sister to be very attractive.  She'll be happy to help arrange some bhbhbhbhbh
I'm pro-cloning and we vote!               Why isn't this card colored green?
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Raoul F. Duke

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Re: Your worst advice in 2 sentences or less.
« Reply #26 on: January 10, 2012, 10:01:40 AM »
Your electrical appliances from home will work just fine in China. Simply bend the power-cord prongs with some good stout pliers until they fit your sockets.
"Vicodin and dumplings...it's a great combination!" (Anthony Bourdain, in Harbin)

"Here in China we aren't just teaching...
we're building the corrupt, incompetent, baijiu-swilling buttheads of tomorrow!" (Raoul F. Duke)

Escaped Lunatic

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Re: Your worst advice in 2 sentences or less.
« Reply #27 on: January 11, 2012, 12:44:48 AM »
Or else just strip the ends of the wires and jam them into the socket.  Raoul once posted a video showing how this method is used and is completely safe. agagagagag
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A-Train

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Re: Your worst advice in 2 sentences or less.
« Reply #28 on: January 11, 2012, 06:49:46 AM »
Pedestrians have right-of-way.
"The young do not know enough to be prudent, and therefore attempt the impossible and achieve it, generation after generation.

Pearl S. Buck

Raoul F. Duke

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Re: Your worst advice in 2 sentences or less.
« Reply #29 on: January 11, 2012, 11:54:46 AM »
Pedestrians have right-of-way.

Oh man that's ice cold and seriously funny. agagagagag

"If you feel hot in the summer, just strip down and jump into the nearest canal. Refresh-o-licious!"
"Vicodin and dumplings...it's a great combination!" (Anthony Bourdain, in Harbin)

"Here in China we aren't just teaching...
we're building the corrupt, incompetent, baijiu-swilling buttheads of tomorrow!" (Raoul F. Duke)