Raoul's China Saloon (V4.0 Beta)

The Bar Room => The Bar (ON-TOPIC) => Topic started by: Con ate dog on January 15, 2008, 08:49:52 AM

Title: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on January 15, 2008, 08:49:52 AM
"The world scrambles to train in new Olympic gymnastics events"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on January 15, 2008, 09:51:42 AM
Con ate,I think this will become a permanent thread.
Showed this to my wife and her cousin today. My wife didn't say anything. She went into the next room and came back with a pair of giant-size clothespins, pointed them at me and said, "Your turn"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: ericthered on January 15, 2008, 09:54:58 AM
"Look Ma, no hands!"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Nolefan on January 15, 2008, 10:11:35 AM
Con ate,I think this will become a permanent thread.
Showed this to my wife and her cousin today. My wife didn't say anything. She went into the next room and came back with a pair of giant-size clothespins, pointed them at me and said, "Your turn"

Sounds like your wife and mine could be related ( in mischief... )

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on January 15, 2008, 11:55:26 AM
Floating in the air like bricks don't aliens from the planet Tile, previously frustrated in their attempts to make contact with primary household structures sought communication one day with the mammals.  They happened upon Chinese Gong Fu master Chen Xi'r T'les. 

Owing to superior attunement to his environment and a grave sense of his responsibility to society, when Chen noticed two bricks floating beside him he whirled around and called out a warning to the crowd of people who like Chen had been engaged in respectful observance of Solemn Red Pants Day.  "Look out!  Stand back!" Chen called.

The aliens looked at one another, and smirked.  The bricks were heard to yell "Nipple cripple," just before they attacked.

"Oh," Chen said.

The aliens are known for their steadfast support of the One China policy.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on January 15, 2008, 12:06:11 PM
Or...

"And this is just with my shirt off!"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: contemporarydog on January 15, 2008, 12:18:08 PM
"Don't worry, folks, the only other choice they gave me was to sit in a padded room with no food or water or sleep and have a tape consisting of "Yesterday Once More", Backstreet Boys and Kenny G on a perpetual loop.  This is like heaven compared with that."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Nolefan on January 15, 2008, 01:01:59 PM

Aghh! I knew it!  The ant on the left brick is messing up the balance asasasasas
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on January 15, 2008, 01:09:55 PM
China Daily News

An Lee releases still shot of his new action movie

Faster than a speeding silkworm, able to leap large pools of phlegm in a single bound

"Look, up into the construction site"

"It's a turd", "It's a crane"

"No it's Brick-man"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on January 15, 2008, 04:23:06 PM
"And you thought twirling pastie-tassels was hard...!!.."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Shroomy on January 16, 2008, 01:04:29 AM
"I knew the sex change operation would be tough, but I never imagined that this how the breast augmentation would be done!"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Lotus Eater on January 16, 2008, 01:19:54 AM
 bkbkbkbkbk Ouch!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Ruth on January 16, 2008, 04:53:06 AM
(kinda on topic)  Love your new avatar Shroomy.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Acjade on January 16, 2008, 05:54:35 AM
"Brickie's and Labourer's Union? Shen me?"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Kavahead on January 16, 2008, 06:05:21 AM
Geez, makes my qualms about moving to China to teach English seem kind of trivial... Is this guy a teaching a "foundation" course? (I have heard they are to be avoided.)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Lotus Eater on January 16, 2008, 06:17:41 AM
The life of a construction worker in China is not an easy one!!  This is the usual way of tossing the bricks up to the top of the building.  Centrifugal force.

yeah - English teaching is a doddle after watching some of the other jobs available in China.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on January 16, 2008, 11:01:21 AM
Just wait until you see where I next hang these two bricks!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Lotus Eater on January 16, 2008, 11:03:07 AM
 bkbkbkbkbk

Again - ouch!!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: ericthered on January 16, 2008, 01:21:55 PM
Just wait until you see where I next hang these two bricks!

Ouch...
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on January 16, 2008, 03:34:21 PM
Granny Mae, I wish I'd thought of that one myself. Here's to ya! agagagagag bfbfbfbfbf bkbkbkbkbk
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: mrozark on January 16, 2008, 05:07:07 PM
"So I go's to one-a them fancy schmancy places in LA and the guy sez: 5 thousand bucks for a boob job. 5,000 bucks!!! I says. Screw that. I'll do it myself for free with a string and two bricks. I aint stupid!"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Fugu on January 17, 2008, 12:02:51 PM
The things you gotta do for a construction site job these days.... :P
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: non-dave on January 17, 2008, 11:21:57 PM
"Are you SURE this is an Olympic event?"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on January 18, 2008, 06:06:22 AM
The brick-shaped ships from Rigel 7 set their phasers to "purple nurple".
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Bugalugs on January 18, 2008, 06:13:51 AM
Bai Jiu + A Construction site = Extreme Nipple Piercing 
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Acjade on January 18, 2008, 01:10:57 PM
You wanna peirce my.... I'm outta here.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on January 20, 2008, 11:32:47 AM
"Are you sure this is what the Doctor said will cure my sinusitis?"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on January 20, 2008, 11:34:34 AM
Native American saying, "Chinese man speak with forked tongue!!"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Shroomy on January 20, 2008, 11:40:38 AM
It's the latest Hollywood diet craze, you never actually let the food into your stomach.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on January 20, 2008, 11:41:27 AM
What's the matter? Was it something I said?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: ericthered on January 20, 2008, 12:12:49 PM
What on earth did I do last night?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on January 20, 2008, 12:21:49 PM
"Cho-stis?  Arh me la-er, k?  Gogh suh-ing a do."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Lotus Eater on January 20, 2008, 01:11:34 PM
"it's the cold, normally it comes out as fluid!"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on January 21, 2008, 02:18:01 AM
Dental floss no good; gets stuck in back of throat!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on January 21, 2008, 03:40:53 AM
Next time, Mom, lay your eggs in the ground.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: mrozark on January 22, 2008, 03:19:02 PM
Regarding pictured:

"So, this is why the Chinese spit so much and pick their nose in public.
They've got snakes in there!!!"

[attachment removed for space reason by admin]
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Lotus Eater on January 24, 2008, 02:10:41 PM
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE can we have a photo that doesn't make me go "YECCH" whenever I open/refresh/check/post etc to the forum???
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Shroomy on January 24, 2008, 02:56:56 PM
I think that goes against Raoul's purpose in life.  ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Lotus Eater on January 24, 2008, 03:02:25 PM
Yeah - I know - but just look at the people we are turning away because of it! aoaoaoaoao aoaoaoaoao
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: ericthered on January 24, 2008, 05:59:29 PM
Oh, come on, seeing a man pull a snake out his nostril is exactly the kind of spectacle members here should be accostumed to. I mean, have you seen the stuff Stil does under the table?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on January 24, 2008, 11:15:02 PM
........seeing a man pull a snake out his nostril.......


 bibibibibi  And here I thought he was pulling out an excessive amount of nose-hair (a la Guinness Book of Records) cbcbcbcbcb
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on January 25, 2008, 02:10:42 AM
Poor snake.  bibibibibi
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on January 25, 2008, 02:13:20 PM
Poor snake.  bibibibibi
Reminds me of a story I used to tell about my first wife. No, I think I'll stay on topic just this once.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Acjade on January 27, 2008, 03:52:21 AM
Some men just never get over losing their virility.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on January 27, 2008, 07:28:44 AM
Thank Goodness for OdorEaters tm
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Lotus Eater on January 27, 2008, 09:59:40 AM
Cinderella Rides.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on January 27, 2008, 10:31:25 AM
Quarter finalist, Lamest Sexual Fetish Ever contest.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on January 27, 2008, 01:53:28 PM
Finally!! Shoes big enough for Con's feet!

But maybe in a different colour...to match his qipao?? (Oh.  Wait a minute.  That's Stil's problem!)  Sorry.  My bad.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on January 27, 2008, 02:52:45 PM
Okay team, we're almost at the border. Everyone put your heads down, and if anyone asks why we're crossing, I want one person to speak and only one. Do you know your line?
"We're just looking for our other shoe. We believe she's in Macau"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Acjade on January 28, 2008, 08:27:01 AM
"I'm telling you man that this isn't what she meant when she said she wanted a really big pump!"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on January 28, 2008, 04:49:14 PM
Finally!! Shoes big enough for Con's feet!

Maybe so, but I only wear open-toed.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on January 28, 2008, 07:31:05 PM
Psst, What's that smell?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on January 30, 2008, 04:23:37 AM
Hmmmm! wonder how I can get this thing into position behind the mother in law? uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Shroomy on January 30, 2008, 09:51:32 AM
Once again I think Granny Mae has hit the nail on the head.  bfbfbfbfbf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on February 02, 2008, 11:47:46 PM
Honourable Doctor Man gave me brand new iron ribcage!!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on February 03, 2008, 12:03:11 AM
The most attractive man in China!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Acjade on February 03, 2008, 12:54:04 AM
It's 10 Kuai for the lot.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on February 03, 2008, 08:04:48 AM
I wish they'd close that battery factory upstream.  It's not the cancer I mind so much as the damn magnetism.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on February 03, 2008, 08:58:36 AM
 I don't care how much you'd pay for the photo I'm not having a naked woman sitting on my head as well!

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Lotus Eater on February 04, 2008, 06:05:16 PM
Apprentice Chick Magnet
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on February 20, 2008, 11:23:31 PM
Welcome to Gamma Gamma Gamma MaxiMinimus Sorority.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cheekygal on February 21, 2008, 02:11:14 AM
Isn't it HOOTERS Ad?

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on February 21, 2008, 07:40:23 AM
Yup.  Has anybody ever been?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on February 21, 2008, 11:07:45 AM
Isn't it HOOTERS Ad?


It may well be....but aren't we supposed to come up with an "Alternate Heading" for it??
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on February 21, 2008, 11:09:50 AM
Yup.  Has anybody ever been?

Don't need to go.  My "knockers" are way nicer than theirs!! ahahahahah bpbpbpbpbp
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Bugalugs on February 21, 2008, 11:11:06 AM
Totally would hate to put the girls to shame.

agagagagag

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on February 21, 2008, 11:45:46 AM
I think only five of us want "peace";the rest will take whatever or whoever is available! afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on February 21, 2008, 11:58:04 AM
....a peace/piece on the side?.....
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: kcanuck on February 21, 2008, 12:05:44 PM
give 'piece' a chance 
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cheekygal on February 21, 2008, 12:51:12 PM
My friends didnt like the food there.

*Come and ye shall be hooted*
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on February 21, 2008, 05:25:23 PM
Knock, knock.
- Whoooo's there?
My child's tuition is coming due.
- My child's tuition is coming due whoooo?
Welcome! You very handsome! Smoking or non-?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: contemporarydog on February 22, 2008, 03:07:39 AM
Raoul's new teaching job provided him with an even warmer welcome than he had anticipated.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: ericthered on February 22, 2008, 01:18:09 PM
"Our staff are all open girls who like foreigners very much"
Ef recruitment poster.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on February 22, 2008, 01:35:40 PM
"Our staff are all open girls who like foreigners very much"
Ef recruitment poster.

 ararararar Whoring out their staff!?   ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on February 22, 2008, 03:43:44 PM
Give a guy a break.  Waldo gotta go where Corporate send him.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on February 22, 2008, 04:15:10 PM
 ahahahahah  I concede.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on February 23, 2008, 12:05:49 AM
Did I get the wrong sign for "peace" AMonk?  I think its a victory sign as well. Granny knows what the signal means when the hand is turned the other way uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on February 23, 2008, 06:29:58 AM
Did I get the wrong sign for "peace" AMonk?  I think its a victory sign as well. Granny knows what the signal means when the hand is turned the other way uuuuuuuuuu

I was being a smart-ass. 

If you give the "peace" (victory) sign, then stick out your little finger as well, then you have "Peace (piece) -- with a lttle bit on the side" afafafafaf  After all, these girls are Hooters!!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on February 24, 2008, 06:05:55 AM
Thanks for clearing that up AMonk bfbfbfbfbf Granny was wondering if it was just another sign that her wheels were falling off ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on March 05, 2008, 09:35:49 AM
I like looking at bimbos as much as the next guy, but can we put up a new pic now?  three weeks later... avavavavav
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: contemporarydog on March 05, 2008, 10:26:32 AM
Yes, plus it's another 'bit uncomfortable when constantly faced with it in the office' type pic :D
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Lotus Eater on March 05, 2008, 10:36:38 AM
There definitely seems to be a male orientation to the photo selection.  Either gross or bimbo'd. Send in our yummy Chippendales. When you check the posting rates - women are equally represented int eh top 20 posters. Eye candy for us is GOOD!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: limubai2000 on March 05, 2008, 10:40:19 AM
HK ain't even stylish enough to have a Hooters... I miss Beijing.

 asasasasas

I think I will drink beer tonight then!

 jjjjjjjjjj
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: ericthered on March 05, 2008, 11:08:07 AM
Lotus, doesn't the Saloon have enough eye candy for you to ogle at?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: kcanuck on March 05, 2008, 11:41:11 AM
If you boys wanna get your centerfold pics organized, we ladies would be more than happy to ogle uuuuuuuuuu You could do a Mr. Month type thing...so, who's going to be Mr. March???  Since we're in China, a themed approach would be good...Mr. March posing with nothing but his chopsticks, Mr. April holding a strategically placed hong bao, Mr. May carefully perched atop his bicycle...
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Shroomy on March 05, 2008, 11:44:47 AM
Now we're back to George and the dance of the seven feathers?  Boss, have we enrolled any beefcake members lately?  I know.  cbcbcbcbcb
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on March 05, 2008, 02:33:56 PM
There definitely seems to be a male orientation to the photo selection.  Either gross or bimbo'd. Send in our yummy Chippendales. When you check the posting rates - women are equally represented int eh top 20 posters. Eye candy for us is GOOD!

The chick pics don't show nipples... or, um, details.  Ours are tasteful.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Lotus Eater on March 05, 2008, 02:39:58 PM
Totally dependent on your taste. 

Mine doesn't run to the pics to date.  Maybe ... there must be something wrong with me... what could it be...oh... maybe I'm FEMALE! aoaoaoaoao aoaoaoaoao bibibibibi

Although I am not too keen on photos of George doing the dance of the seven feathers either.  A conundrum.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: ericthered on March 05, 2008, 02:49:36 PM
But have you ever considered that we men would be offended to be just used, treated as mere objects, like slabs of meat at display at the butchers, completely objectified to lend some material to the raunchy fantasies most ladies protest they don't have? Because of you did.....

You would be dead wrong. Why would any man be averse to that? What was it you requested...oiled up and riding a bicycle... agagagagag agagagagag
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on March 05, 2008, 02:58:16 PM
And you make it sound like guys touch themselves to photos of men with snakes up their noses.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: ericthered on March 05, 2008, 03:03:45 PM
How??? I meant that men do not, as a rule, mind being objectified by members of the fairer sex.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on March 05, 2008, 04:11:02 PM
I think Con was replying to Lotus.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on March 05, 2008, 04:31:27 PM
There definitely seems to be a male orientation to the photo selection.  Either gross or bimbo'd.

Please. ::)

Although I could definitely use more "Weird Asia" pics to put up there. If ya got 'em, e-mail 'em to me... spamjiaozi@yahoo.com
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on March 05, 2008, 08:29:50 PM
" asasasasas Tourists want a 'gen-yoo-wine soo-vin-ear' do they?!?  Let them suck on this for a while..."






OR

Gets my seal of approval...
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on March 05, 2008, 09:53:33 PM
Quote
There definitely seems to be a male orientation to the photo selection.  Either gross or bimbo'd.
So far, only one bimbo pic. We need more! One "gross" pic, enough for a month or two. One "bizarre" pic of a magnetic man. Attractive, in a strange way! Surely, a wide enough selection to entertain a duality of the sexes? A sense of humour is generally required to view these pcs.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Lotus Eater on March 05, 2008, 10:59:23 PM
Magnet man comes under 'weird Asia'. Nose man - gross, Santa - gross, Hooters chicks - boring (NOT weird Asia) and bimbo'd. This one 'weird Asia - but no weirder than Seaworlds anywhere else on the planet.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: dragonsaver on March 06, 2008, 01:29:18 AM
Chinese writing made easy.

Love this one.  It is the best one yet. agagagagag agagagagag
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cheekygal on March 06, 2008, 01:33:03 AM
Perhaps if I tried writing with my teeth...
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: kcanuck on March 06, 2008, 03:51:52 AM
recent graduate of Nolefan's English Boot Camp
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Shroomy on March 06, 2008, 04:41:35 AM
 bkbkbkbkbk  If only I'd had time off from EF to attend I could be doing that well.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternat[b]ive[/b] headings
Post by: contemporarydog on March 06, 2008, 05:17:28 AM
Can I be a pedant here and say that the correct title should be 'alternative headings', not 'alternate'.

This is quite a bugbear of mine about american english.  If someone lived, for instance, 'alternate lifestyles', it would mean that they lived one lifestyle one week, then the other lifestyle the other week, then the other, and so on.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: non-dave on March 06, 2008, 06:32:11 AM
bkbkbkbkbk  If only I'd had time off from EF to attend I could be doing that well.

Not quite...

The bootcamp technique also doesn't require the use of your hands, but you would be looking over your shoulder at the page.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on March 06, 2008, 06:43:40 AM
Increasingly despondent as the end of his performing days drew near, Charlie the angriest circus seal took to zen koan to find peace.
"But how is it useful in our daily lives?" asked one reporter.
"Don't test me, man," Charlie snarled.
"But come on, Charlie!  Has a dog Buddha-nature or not?"

If only they would have listened.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on March 06, 2008, 07:59:01 AM
 bkbkbkbkbk  I was going to add something cute, but now I won't bother.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on March 06, 2008, 08:04:12 AM
A Sea World escapee makes some foreigners look stupid.

And I bet it's English penmanship is better than mine.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Fugu on March 06, 2008, 12:35:03 PM
Pass? Of course I’ll pass, my parents are loaded!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on March 06, 2008, 02:18:24 PM
LE, I wasn't crazy about the bimbos either, but then at my age I've seen enough hooters without going to the bar. Brick-swingng, magneto and nose-snake all struck me as "weird-Asia", and if the last was a bit gross (well more than a bit), I didn't think of it as a "guys' only" pic. Not all guys are going to see things the same way. Possibly not all women either. In short, I think the variety of responses to the pics across the sexes is probably greater than the difference between the sexes. BICBW.
Calach, take a bow.
Chian-matt, cheekygal, I knew I was doing something wrong, but I didn't think it would take a dumb animal to show me what.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: ericthered on March 06, 2008, 03:46:34 PM
The Galapagos Island's Ambassador signs his name while visiting China.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: dragonsaver on March 07, 2008, 12:10:01 AM
 bkbkbkbkbk bkbkbkbkbk axaxaxaxax axaxaxaxax
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: contemporarydog on March 07, 2008, 06:44:05 AM
Mr Wang was confident that even his trained beaver could write better Hanzi than any bignose.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on March 10, 2008, 04:04:08 AM
"Wadda ya mean ya can't understand me accent??"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on March 10, 2008, 07:21:32 AM
SIPIVT official exam invigilators: don't know the meaning of the word corruptible (but have a firm grasp of "fish").
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: ericthered on March 13, 2008, 08:56:07 AM
"Oh God, I want fish, not jiaozi and noodles! You don't understand? Fish! F-I-S-H! Let me write it down for you".
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: dragonsaver on March 15, 2008, 12:54:02 PM
This one is TOO big.  You have to scroll too much just to see your messages!!!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Fugu on March 16, 2008, 04:37:06 AM
This week's picture won't load.... alalalalal
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Nolefan on March 16, 2008, 07:16:27 AM
This week's picture won't load.... alalalalal

be patient with it... it's not a picture, it's a video

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Acjade on March 16, 2008, 12:25:53 PM
I always knew there would come a time and place for my old school song.

And here we are... in the key of D, hit it thanks Raoul!

" This time next week where shall we be

  Outside of the gates of S  H  C

  No more frogs eggs in my tea...."

 Oh my gawd!!! Noo..... aahhh..............
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: ericthered on March 16, 2008, 08:34:41 PM
Acjade...what kind of school did you go too??? Frog eggs in your tea?? Were there cauldrons involved? snails and puppy dog tails? I know,  offtopic
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Acjade on March 17, 2008, 02:25:23 PM
Cauldrons and dark art witches ran a plenty. Puppy dogs tails and black patern leather shoes were also banned. NO mention of boys and nothing reflective that might drive the male mind into to sinful reflections. IT WAS CRAZY.

We sang the song for a month before the holidays began, slowly counting down the time until we were released into real life once again. On the evening before the holidays, the whole refractory openly sang the song in a loud voice. None of the nuns wanted us to appear at home with bruises on our body. It was a bit like singing Up there Cazaly before a Grand Final,actually. And as time has gone by I can look back and see the 'girls' now grown into women and how each of us dealt with that time and educational philosophy. I'm Irish to the core but the last person I'd put on a spaceship to planet Future would be an Irish Mercy teaching nun under the orders of a money grabbing, land expanding Mother Superior.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: ericthered on March 17, 2008, 02:45:06 PM
But....doesn't nuns know that all-girl Catholic schools have been the subject of sinful male fantasies for decades...it's the skirts and white socks...I think...

 offtopic offtopic

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Acjade on March 17, 2008, 02:49:17 PM
But....doesn't nuns know that all-girl Catholic schools have been the subject of sinful male fantasies for decades...it's the skirts and white socks...I think...

Grey uniform and socks at the first convent. Brown at the the second. But I know what you're saying. The Grammar School Boys used to spray paint on the walls after every boat school race: Be a nun and get nun. That was my sex education. Jeezus.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: contemporarydog on April 02, 2008, 04:13:10 AM
as posted on the other thread:

"This man, answering to the name of "Dave" or, sometimes, by his peculiar, sinister alter-egos "Mr Kalgukshi", "Revenant", "Bearman" or "Writerman", is dangerous.  Do not approach him.  He has been at large all over Asia and Latin America and lures innocent FTs into his lair with the promise of decent job adverts and free and open chat.  Before they know it, they are enticed into his basement where they are viciously beset with fraudulent job adverts, smashed over the head with the most overzealous moderation this side of 'Stormtrooper online', and molested with unfair bannings and warnings.

There is a $10,000,000 reward for information leading to the capture of this man.  He is to the ESL community what Osama Bin Laden is to the world.  If you spot him, go straight to the Raoul police and your reward will be placed in a Swiss bank account."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on April 02, 2008, 09:03:23 AM
He looks like a cancer patient.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on April 02, 2008, 09:33:42 AM
Dave, a prisoner in his own home, appreciating good, healthy and civil discussion with Mr Kalgukshi.
 
Words not related to this photograph have been deleted.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Fugu on April 02, 2008, 06:52:44 PM
Mod Edit:

This thread is off topic.
All posters have been warned and severe sanctions have been given cbcbcbcbcb

The forum now has a total of three posters.   afafafafaf afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on April 02, 2008, 09:20:09 PM
Top of the class, Fugu! agagagagag agagagagag
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on April 03, 2008, 04:40:01 AM
My computer at home has been performing like the Leafs (dead in the water) for a few days, I've been battling a head cold and running my tail off chasing after one of those "We have lots of work / we don't have any work for you"  secondary gigs, I've been doing student evals all week, now I see this.  aaaaaaaaaa
You really know how to set up a guy's long weekend. I'm gonna go home, throw the 'puter out the window and sleep until Monday.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Fugu on April 03, 2008, 09:49:37 AM
As the Olympics draws closer, no expense is spared and modernisation of the fire department begins to take effect... ;D ;D
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on April 03, 2008, 10:19:40 AM
Mod Edit:

This thread is off topic.
All posters have been warned and severe sanctions have been given cbcbcbcbcb

The forum now has a total of three posters.   afafafafaf afafafafaf

This is f*cking brilliant. It's what we shoulda run in the first place. bibibibibi
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: dragonsaver on April 03, 2008, 10:26:59 AM
Save it for next April!!!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on April 03, 2008, 11:46:47 AM
It may not carry much, but the dalmatian can pull it.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: contemporarydog on April 03, 2008, 11:48:28 AM
When Postman Pat first heard that he was being 'downsized' and 'relocated to China' he had no idea that they had this in mind.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on April 05, 2008, 12:39:12 PM
Sometimes the picture is just too funny for words, but I'm going to try anyway.
Drivers wanted. Enquire at your local Fire Department.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: becster79 on April 05, 2008, 12:55:36 PM
Picture- 'New fire vehicles. Comes with firehook'

(referring to hooked used to pull down London during the Great Fire- still in that London holiday mode 2 months later!)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on April 05, 2008, 01:17:22 PM
The government introduces new equipment for the Laowai Volunteer Fire Department.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: mrozark on April 06, 2008, 01:20:00 PM
(Picture posted for reference)

"Beijing out to impress the world with new fire-fighting equipment.
Just in time for the Olympics!"



[attachment removed for space reason by admin]
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on April 06, 2008, 05:47:21 PM
Top of the line equipment endorsed by:
The People's Committee for Harmonious Public Fire Safety and Security
Safety is our middle name, almost.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on April 08, 2008, 08:02:21 AM
In Case Of Fire--- You'll look sweet upon the seat of a fire bike built for two.(sung to the tune of "Daisy") agagagagag
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on April 08, 2008, 11:09:00 AM
wweeEEEEee....wwEEEEeeee...wweeEEeee...

On hindsight, powering the siren through the pedals was a bad idea.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on April 09, 2008, 10:16:43 PM
Raoul finally posts a pic of the bike he's been bragging about!   ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on April 09, 2008, 10:49:12 PM
Quote
Raoul finally posts a pic of the bike he's been bragging about!
bibibibibi

I wish I had said that!! agagagagag agagagagag
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on April 13, 2008, 08:51:22 PM
Overcome by jealousy after hearing so much about Raoul's bike, George spends his life savings on a hot new ride.
 ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on April 13, 2008, 09:15:24 PM
As if mere money alone could get his stank ass on a ride like The Rocket. ::)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on April 13, 2008, 09:36:15 PM
Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm! llllllllll
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: contemporarydog on April 13, 2008, 11:31:38 PM
The bar owner immediately regretted his decision to make Worzel Gummidge and Yasser Arafat his chief barstaff.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on April 14, 2008, 04:39:23 AM
Hi guys!  This is your agent.  You're out, boys!  You're finally out! 
Seasame Street's been cancelled.  And you're gonna open a bar!

(http://xs226.xs.to/xs226/08161/rn949.jpg) (http://xs.to)

But you need a disguise.

(http://xs126.xs.to/xs126/08161/raouletnolefan2537.jpg) (http://xs.to)

...you're going to China!!1!

(http://xs126.xs.to/xs126/08161/raouletnolefan3989.jpg) (http://xs.to)

Ten years later...
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cheekygal on April 14, 2008, 06:27:06 AM
The long lost twins...
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on April 14, 2008, 08:04:15 AM
Dammit, Calach, I don't have a change of jeans with me!  ahahahahah pppppppppp

And what a night it was...  jjjjjjjjjj 

Nolefan's an encyclopedia of Arabic music, right down to hating that label as a catchall for several different music forms.  Add to that Lolochan's knowledge of swing and latin music, my education's getting a huge boost.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Bugalugs on April 14, 2008, 09:09:28 AM
Bollock and i missed it. Oh well next time lads. :)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on April 14, 2008, 09:44:58 PM
It was indeed a night.
Dinner was a hoot. The bar was fun, especially the late-night part where Disco Con and Disco Nolefan got boogied down with some... intriguing  dance moves. aoaoaoaoao
Film at 11. uuuuuuuuuu
That night I had the pleasure of Nolefan's company, finally got the long-sought behind-the-bar photo, was (strange but true) outright given an iPod out of the blue by a bar patron, bought (and was bought in return) more drinks than Dr. C. Everett Coop would have probably advised, and got nibbled on by assorted Chinese girls. afafafafaf

It was indeed a night.

Come let's do it again.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on April 15, 2008, 10:24:38 AM
Just post the pics Upstairs, please.  cbcbcbcbcb  I teach kindie.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on April 15, 2008, 06:59:04 PM
Oh. Wow. I guess I shouldn't have sold them to that TV station then.

Oops. My bad. Sorry.

uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: ericthered on April 15, 2008, 08:43:08 PM
Come on, just ask if we serve Jack Daniels and ice tea...we dare you!!!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on April 16, 2008, 12:01:44 AM
Our bartenders look a lot more suave since we instituted the new employee dress code.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on April 18, 2008, 02:33:01 AM
The rebel Leaders ferment plans to overthrow the Mods on Dave's World.  A revolution appears to be brewing.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: teleplayer on April 19, 2008, 05:25:09 PM
This picture is a true manifestation of the thoughts behind Raoul's old icon and caption borrowed from Doonsbury, "we mixed your drink special."  afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on April 20, 2008, 12:41:49 PM
1) Nole, my wife wants to know if your beard is real. Hey, I spoke up for you, but she doesn't trust me.
2) Don't you guys belong back in the movie thread someplace, where we were talking about who makes the best James Bond? If not, maybe the ladies can have a vote as to who makes the best JB. Remember gentlemen, it's shaken, not stirred.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Shroomy on April 20, 2008, 01:51:50 PM
I hope to lay eyes on him in the next couple days.  bfbfbfbfbf  Will report back re: beard.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Nolefan on April 20, 2008, 02:47:43 PM
1) Nole, my wife wants to know if your beard is real. Hey, I spoke up for you, but she doesn't trust me.

every single hair of it is.... guaranteed 100% genuine bfbfbfbfbf bfbfbfbfbf I'm just wondering as to how my beard would become the topic of a conversation between you and your wife  aoaoaoaoao aoaoaoaoao
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on April 20, 2008, 07:09:38 PM
I assure you the beard is quite real.
However, the rest of his head is entirely synthetic. aoaoaoaoao

Quote
Remember gentlemen, it's shaken, not stirred.
I think it's all really in what you use to stir it with. uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on April 21, 2008, 05:05:05 AM
"Well your honour,it basically comes down to this--Would you trust either of these guys with YOUR daughter?" afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cheekygal on April 21, 2008, 06:41:42 AM
latefordinner, his beard is 100% authentic. I even pulled it once... ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on April 21, 2008, 08:30:02 AM
I see an ancient Egyptian style in his future: metal-studded straps tied down just so.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on April 21, 2008, 08:54:07 AM
The Booze Brothers!...........on a mission from Dog!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: teleplayer on April 22, 2008, 02:34:29 AM
The Booze Brothers!...........on a mission from Dog!
\
 
I think the dancing duck chook is on to something.   ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on April 22, 2008, 11:57:38 AM
Nolefan, she came into the room when she heard me smiling and had to see what was so interesting. Not my fault at all. Blame it on the TV show she was bored with.
GM, I wanted to ask again, "which one makes the better 007?", but your point is well taken. Or maybe not. How many women are thinking about their daughters when they talk about the new James Bond?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: VoiceWithin on April 22, 2008, 12:14:03 PM
Nolefan, she came into the room when she heard me smiling


A smile that can be heard ... almost as intriguing as the beard itself.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on May 08, 2008, 01:05:31 PM
Can we change the picture? This ones creeping me out. Their eyes follow you everywhere。 鬼啊!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Nolefan on May 08, 2008, 04:50:33 PM
Can we change the picture? This ones creeping me out. Their eyes follow you everywhere。 鬼啊!

Here's looking at you kid!!!! beware!!!  uuuuuuuuuu uuuuuuuuuu uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on May 08, 2008, 08:28:01 PM
Yep. Sorry, bitch, but he's right...we were AIMING  to creep you out. You, specifically. agagagagag ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on July 12, 2008, 02:17:26 PM
Uuummmm....... mmmmmmmmmm Does this mean that I need to get Hubby to s.h.a.v.e.  amamamamam before we arrive in Shanghai??  (We're talking full beard+moustache here!  Not to mention his plaited "tail", which is nearly waist-long).
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: adamsmith on July 12, 2008, 05:45:47 PM
Here in Shanghai we the gooder speakies of englishes. We know need yous forigners to come teach us no mores.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on July 12, 2008, 09:51:18 PM
I think they were saying to "be patient; when your beard is long enough to wrap you will know what to do."

What's frightening is that, after 20+ hours in the air transit system, this sign made complete perfect sense... aoaoaoaoao
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cheekygal on July 13, 2008, 01:01:41 AM
So... RD... was your beard thoroughly checked on arrival?  uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on July 13, 2008, 01:11:25 AM
No...my beard is not long enough to wrap yet, and the guard was required to issue me a false beard at the gate. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Ruth on July 13, 2008, 02:48:17 AM
But did he thoroughly check your beard?  Never know what might come into the country that way  ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on July 13, 2008, 07:48:08 AM
Too busy checking the beard to check the pockets
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on August 02, 2008, 12:38:45 PM
I'm pretty darn certain that a picture of Beckham is NOT going to help Hubby with any sort of "Long Love"...quite the contrary, in fact.....
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on August 03, 2008, 06:25:20 AM
Given the look on Beckham's face,I'd say he's having trouble "bending" it. Perhaps that's the reason his picture is on the packet; if he can't,then no one can. Boy! that has got to be painful. aoaoaoaoao Wonder how long it stays like that??? uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Schnerby on August 03, 2008, 11:14:10 AM
David Beckham, the sexy, cutting-edge fashion icon (or so they say) really just repulses me.  aaaaaaaaaa

This gave me a good chuckle though  ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Schnerby on August 13, 2008, 11:13:19 AM
Can someone please explain what this woman is doing?
I did try and figure it out myself, but there is no good reason for doing the splits on a log on a river (Well no good reason I can see anyway).
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on August 13, 2008, 11:19:23 AM
It's the newest Olympic Event afafafafaf......combination Balance Beam/Pole Vault/High-Wire Walk/Sculling competition ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on August 13, 2008, 03:52:58 PM
It's from the new music video, Log Driveress's Waltz.

IF you ask any man from the parish around
What pleases him most from his head to his toes
He'll say, "I'm not really sure that it's business of yours
But I do like to waltz with a log-driver"
For she goes birling down, down the white water
That's where the log-driver learns to step lightly.
It's birling down, down the white water
A log-driver's waltz pleases gentlemen completely

OK, non-Canadians won't get the reference. Check this then:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rPDi9DzihrE (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rPDi9DzihrE)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on August 13, 2008, 04:24:50 PM
She is crossing the river on one single bamboo pole, snd using a second one as a paddle.

The guy behind her is STANDING on a single bamboo pole in the middle of the river. aoaoaoaoao
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: non-dave on August 13, 2008, 10:38:52 PM
Why?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on August 13, 2008, 10:39:46 PM
Up periscope.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on August 14, 2008, 07:02:46 AM
What do you mean watch out for the piranhas?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on August 14, 2008, 07:12:59 AM
Just thought of another one.

There's many a slip twixt the pole and the lips! uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 15, 2008, 08:49:28 PM

Gymnastics First!
Learn from the best foreign teachers we can lure to work for us.

Even if you don't make the team , you'll still learn many useful skills.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 17, 2008, 03:27:55 PM
Our new line of personal watercraft are reasonably priced, quiet, and also very eco-friendly.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: DaDan on August 17, 2008, 04:53:50 PM
proof that distraction in the subtest forms works, Raoul can't seem to take his eyes & mind away from the near girl in blue to care if the person in red behind her is a guy or gal.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 17, 2008, 08:09:38 PM
There were some unfortunate translation errors in the rules for pole vaulting at the Olympics this year.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 29, 2008, 11:32:27 PM
Raoul's new Gentlemen's Club - Employee entrance.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on August 30, 2008, 05:09:21 AM
We do not discriminate. Sir, please feel free to enter when wearing your dress.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cheekygal on August 30, 2008, 05:14:05 AM
Cross-dressing has finally been introduced in China.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on August 30, 2008, 07:36:25 AM
 amamamamam Not being able to read Chinese, I would like to know....do I accept the picture and use this bathroom, or do I cross my legs a lot tighter for a while longer?? mmmmmmmmmm
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: decurso on August 30, 2008, 08:26:06 AM
 The picture actually says "xi shou jian", which simply means washroom. Doesn't help much I'm afraid.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Ruth on August 30, 2008, 02:11:16 PM
Amonk, what you do before you learn how to read (and if there is no helpful picture or English words, like in the photo  ::) ), is wait until someone either comes out or goes in.  If they have the same plumbing as you, follow them and you should be okay.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cheekygal on August 30, 2008, 02:13:59 PM
Or just peek in  - if the first thing you see are pissoirs, definitely not your place!  ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on August 30, 2008, 02:23:55 PM
Amonk, what you do before you learn how to read (and if there is no helpful picture or English words, like in the photo  ::) ), is wait until someone either comes out or goes in.  If they have the same plumbing as you, follow them and you should be okay.
bkbkbkbkbk
Or just peek in  - if the first thing you see are pissoirs, definitely not your place!  ahahahahah
bkbkbkbkbk

Thanks for the smiles, Ladies agagagagag
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Mr Nobody on August 30, 2008, 04:17:45 PM
It's either an offer or a display.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Ruth on August 31, 2008, 12:37:40 AM
May be funny, but I can't tell you the number of times I relied on that method until I learned what the symbol for 'woman' is.  In the backwoods where I started my China experience, there were no fancy pictures or English words.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 02, 2008, 12:19:41 AM
I decided that this was one issue where being completely illiterate in Chinese wasn't going to cause me any problems.  I'd been in China for less than a week when I went to one of the unused floors of the building before a night class and spent about 20 minutes carefully memorizing the symbols for male and female outside the restrooms.

male         female 
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: adamsmith on September 03, 2008, 11:43:18 PM
and to show how wordly we are we have also provided special facilities for our scottish friends. agagagagag
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Mr Nobody on September 05, 2008, 12:43:37 AM
Or T-girls.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 09, 2008, 01:02:13 AM
It's win a Michael Phelps autograph at the Water Cube day!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cheekygal on September 09, 2008, 01:03:39 AM
 bibibibibi That's what people must have felt during Noah's times...
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Lotus Eater on September 09, 2008, 03:00:21 AM
Jiaozi in a pot.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Schnerby on September 09, 2008, 03:47:34 AM
There is a guy near the front right with what appears to be a mouthful of water.

I would sure be keen to drink that people soup.  aaaaaaaaaa
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: adamsmith on September 09, 2008, 03:48:41 AM
Ok, who peed in the pool. uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on September 09, 2008, 09:17:37 AM
And the bloke , bottom-left, wearing a "DRUNK.." cap!!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Shroomy on September 09, 2008, 09:35:35 AM
The fishing nets got a little too close to shore this time, reeling in an unusual catch.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on September 09, 2008, 12:13:02 PM
In Suzhou, even the canals are jammed at rush hour.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Acjade on September 09, 2008, 01:42:18 PM
Titanic Convention is more popular here than Trekkies.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on September 10, 2008, 06:21:01 AM
Ok. who farted?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 28, 2008, 03:49:13 PM
All thieves requested attend mandatory training class on proper rob techniques.  Careful thieves not caught, less work for PSB.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: MK on September 28, 2008, 05:39:20 PM
I like this one - it's like something Yoda would say whilst instructing a young thief
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on September 29, 2008, 05:24:15 AM
At last,ETR has found the perfect bag to match his fantastic glasses. bfbfbfbfbf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Spaghetti on September 29, 2008, 06:43:00 AM
"Dongguan Welcomes You!" Of course, it needs the Fuhwa and olympic logo on it.

Another idea, a famous quote, "To Be Rich Is Glorious!" - Deng Xiaoping. uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Ruth on September 29, 2008, 08:51:26 AM
The new slogan, on billboards all over DG, is "Dongguan's civilization depends on you".  This picture's not up on the billboards, though. Wonder why? mmmmmmmmmm Don't want to show the ugly parts?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Spaghetti on September 29, 2008, 02:06:35 PM
"Dongguan's civilization depends on you"
(http://www.koval.net/Dongguan,%20Guandong%20province%20China%20-%20b%20John%20McMunn.jpg) ahahahahah


Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: ericthered on September 29, 2008, 02:54:59 PM
That's an amazing pic, Spaghetti. agagagagag
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: teleplayer on September 29, 2008, 03:17:23 PM
I second ETR's comment. Really amazing at how enterprising people will be when, as they say in India, one must do the needful. 


Then the very evil and cynical sarcastic side of me wants to put the caption "melamine saleman making his rounds." Hope all will forgive me for that one.
 oooooooooo
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Spaghetti on September 29, 2008, 04:28:48 PM
I agree, Eric. It was snapped by a man named John McGunn.

Teleplayer, I thought along similar lines, but opted out of that. I figure I'd stick with the less ominous, "Hang in there" poster with the monkey hanging with one arm, perilously off of a tree, kind of inspirational vibe.

In my personal collection, sitting on one of these DVD-Rs, I have a pic of a man on a bike carrying a weather balloon sized, inflatable lantern that is about twice the size of the man. Pretty hilarious, but I applaud the fact he could handle it with moxie.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 29, 2008, 07:38:00 PM
Donate to the local PSB Benevolent Fund, or else we'll stop arresting criminals.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: teleplayer on October 02, 2008, 10:31:44 PM
Donate to the local PSB Benevolent Fund, or else we'll stop arresting criminals.

Perhaps, but I think the banner will be requested by USANIA Congress as the "bailout banner."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 03, 2008, 02:08:04 AM
Perhaps, but I think the banner will be requested by USANIA Congress as the "bailout banner."

 :th_bk:

So true!!!!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 22, 2008, 07:15:10 PM
Chinese headbangers take the concept a little too far.
 axaxaxaxax
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: contemporarydog on October 22, 2008, 09:19:53 PM
The Chinese attempt to recreate the famous scene from the movie 'Scanners' proved more dangerous than had at first been anticipated.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on October 22, 2008, 11:24:43 PM
"Excedrin headache Number 5-0-3...."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 23, 2008, 02:04:06 AM
The PLA's new initiative to cure blockheads gets off to an excellent start.  ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on October 23, 2008, 04:59:07 AM
Foreign teacher initiation as reenacted by PLA.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on October 23, 2008, 06:02:20 AM
In the wake of devastating earthquakes, many members of the People's Liberation Army, always ready in times of need, have volunteered for a more personal and heartfelt role in the development of Great and Green China.  Zhang Feng, pictured, leads the way. 

As is suitable Zhang and his team, employing the simple yet moral technological axiom, "take from the West what is good and discard what is bad", and long aware of the traditional British oligarchy's habit of hanging their dead from the castle walls, have developed a revolutionary method both for the early warning of impending disaster and the simple fortification of all new buildings.  Seen pictured preparing for his new role as human foundation stone for a classroom in Northern Sichuan, Zhang Feng and three colleagues, along with seven auxiliary battalions of the PLA, will be hammered into the ground at critical wall junctures on all four sides of any new building.  This architectural innovation is known simply as the "English" Corner.  It is understood that while both holding up one whole side of a building and warmly exhorting our young people to study hard, should these brave and selfless soldiers feel any tremor or vibration, they will also call out loudly to warn the little scholars and encourage them to run.

Zhang, shortly after his first structural impact examination, was interviewed by a Reuters correspondent.  When asked about the experience, Zhang appeared to sink deep into thought.  "What's your lane?" he asked, dazed.

Our correspondent bore Zhang's wandering middle distance gaze stoically, perhaps reminded by Zhang's mere presence that there are worse things than miscommunication.  Then Zhang appeared suddenly to wake up.  "How about Chinese?" he asked.

Our correspondent was moved, but declined.

Other advances in modern structural engineering include the "Fire Alarm", which includes screaming when burnt by fire, and "CCTV", aka lounging around a supermarket for 12 hours a day, or, as seen on actual TV, one vcd player + a video camera = a national broadcaster.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on October 23, 2008, 10:37:38 AM
I thought simply "Traditional Chinese Education" would have done it. But CP, your English Corner deserves a  bkbkbkbkbk
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on October 23, 2008, 11:19:49 PM
And from that day on, as they had promised, Chang never stuttered again.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 24, 2008, 12:50:51 AM
The PLA's new quality control system finds defective bricks more quickly than all previous methods. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on November 03, 2008, 04:14:22 PM
John, if ye dinna withdraw yer han' from unner me kilt, NOW, I'm gang ta stick this champagne floot whir th' sun niver shines. uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Lotus Eater on November 03, 2008, 04:28:03 PM
 A Man's a Man For A' That
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on November 03, 2008, 05:15:38 PM
Why...Nothing is worn under me kilt; 'tis all in perfect working order!! afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Nolefan on November 03, 2008, 05:42:52 PM
Scotsman clad in kilt left the bar one evening fair
And one could tell by how he walked he'd drunk more than his share
He staggered on until he could no longer keep his feet
Then stumbled off into the grass to sleep beside the street.

Ring ding diddle diddle i de o
Ring di diddle i o
He stumbled off into the grass to sleep beside the street.

Later on two young and lovely girls just happened by,
And one says to the other with a twinkle in her eye
You see yon sleeping Scotsman who is young and handsome built
I wonder if it's true what they don't wear beneath their kilt.

Ring ding diddle diddle i de o
Ring di diddle i o
I wonder if it's true what they don't wear beneath their kilt.

They crept up to the sleeping Scotsman quiet as could be
Then lifted up his kilt about an inch so they could see
And there behold for them to view beneath his Scottish skirt
Was nothing but what God had graced him with upon his birth

Ring ding diddle diddle i de o
Ring di diddle i o
There was nothing there but what God gave upon his birth

They marveled for a moment then one said we'd best be gone
But let's leave a present for our friend before we move along
They took a blue silk ribbon and they tied it in a bow
Around the bonnie spar that the Scot's lifted kilt did show

Ring ding diddle diddle i de o
Ring di diddle i o
Around the bonnie spar that the Scot's lifted kilt did show

The Scotsman woke to nature's call and stumbled toward a tree
Behind a bush he lifts his kilt and gawks at what he sees
Then in a startled voice he says to what's before his eyes
He said, "Lad I don't know where you've been but I see you won first
prize"

Ring ding diddle diddle i de o
Ring di diddle i o
He said, "Lad I don't know where you've been but I see you won first prize"


Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Lotus Eater on November 03, 2008, 10:38:23 PM
 bkbkbkbkbk

This is exactly what I mean about making keyboard manufacturers happy - although in this case it is Apple who will be the beneficiary - it was my laptop!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 03, 2008, 10:43:21 PM
Remember to always wear a kilt! - sheep can hear a zipper from 100 yards away.   ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on November 05, 2008, 05:50:42 AM
"Here's to the girl on the hill, she won't, but her sister will, so.... here's to her sister!" agagagagag agagagagag uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on December 09, 2008, 03:46:51 AM
PeeWee Herman's other hangout!!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on December 09, 2008, 07:19:45 PM
Serving wankers since 2004!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: James the Brit on December 09, 2008, 07:21:55 PM
Picture taken in Bali this August. Didnt go in. I thought the keyboard might be a litle sticky...
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on December 10, 2008, 04:18:09 AM
Serving wankers since 2004!

2003. aeaeaeaeae
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on December 11, 2008, 01:37:46 AM
We will never be out wankered! bfbfbfbfbf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on December 11, 2008, 03:52:01 AM
At Wank Internet, every hour is happy hour

Monday - Stickiest keyboard contest
Tuesday - First 10 customers get off free
Wednesday - Hump day
Thursday - Ladies night

Join us for Sunday brunch with our famous 'special sauce'

Happy Happy Every Day!!!

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Ruth on December 13, 2008, 01:15:02 PM
Stil - Ewww, but  bkbkbkbkbk
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on December 13, 2008, 08:49:00 PM
Wank Internet - now featuring the and improved Wankotron (TM, Pat Pending)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on December 16, 2008, 02:37:27 AM
Hank regretted outsourcing the production of his internet cafe's sign to China.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: dragonsaver on December 16, 2008, 04:47:54 AM
 bkbkbkbkbk axaxaxaxax axaxaxaxax
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on December 29, 2008, 04:33:54 AM
Chinese mothers only smile when they know that university entrance exams won't be a problem.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on December 29, 2008, 09:08:55 AM
"One child policy?  At least I had a son."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on December 29, 2008, 03:25:33 PM
Don't
Panic!

Zaphod Beeblebrox
was invented in China.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Spaghetti on December 29, 2008, 03:29:48 PM
"Historic Ventriloquism in China - By Gavin Menzies"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: DaDan on December 29, 2008, 04:38:34 PM
`Remember us?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on December 29, 2008, 05:48:25 PM
Despite protests by some of her neighbors, Ling and her son continued to go shopping while wearing pajamas.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on December 29, 2008, 06:30:32 PM
Scientists still can't explain why the famous conjoined twins of Shandong grew at such radically different rates.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on December 31, 2008, 05:58:40 AM
The eerie glow around Mrs. Liu and her infant son was eventually found to be caused by illegal milk additives, leading to the arrest and execution of dairy-company executives in nine provinces across China.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on December 31, 2008, 06:23:43 AM
China Dong Fang Electronics Trading Company today announced the sale of special hats- seen here modeled by the inventor's wife and young son- that provide gentle illumination for reading while simultaneously beaming CCTV broadcasts directly into the brain of the wearer. The hats are available in both ladies' and men's styles, and the CCTV feed is said to give the wearer a constant, vacuous smile.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on January 18, 2009, 11:52:59 PM
Very Suspicious Supermarket - the only supermarket endorsed by Raoul's China Saloon!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on January 19, 2009, 05:26:14 AM
Even has getaway bikes parked out front!  bfbfbfbfbf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Schnerby on January 29, 2009, 10:28:02 PM
What the hell is that?  aoaoaoaoao
A shaved wallaby?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on January 29, 2009, 11:43:41 PM
It's....dinner.
In China the rule is, "If it tastes good, eat it...and don't ask a lot of fool questions you may not want answered..."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on January 30, 2009, 01:24:32 AM
WTF!?!  aaaaaaaaaa aoaoaoaoao aaaaaaaaaa aoaoaoaoao aaaaaaaaaa aoaoaoaoao aaaaaaaaaa
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Shroomy on January 30, 2009, 01:51:09 AM
Dragonsaver had no idea what an eye-opening cultural experience Bootcamp would turn out to be.








With no apologies whatsoever to Noles. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on January 30, 2009, 03:39:53 AM
Many Schools Go All-Out To Make New Teachers Welcome.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on January 30, 2009, 03:42:45 AM
The Chef's Special....Chopped-up squirrel stew stuff!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on January 30, 2009, 06:14:26 AM
Chinese cultural lesson #34

When family pets pass away, the family has a feast.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on January 30, 2009, 06:17:14 AM
At Pet Salon all of our accomodations are designed with comfort in mind. From our cozy kitty condos and private doggy suites, to a complete grooming salon and retail center, no effort is spared in making each of our pet guests feel right at home, and giving you peace of mind while you are away.  As a full pet care facility, we offer a number ofspecial services, including:

    * Pet Shipping.  We are licensed and insured IPATA professional pet shippers.  If you are relocating and need assistance with your best friend's travel needs, we can help.
    * Pickup & Delivery
    * Day Care
    * Crate Rental
    * Training

If you have a special need, just ask!
Closing Down Sale--be quick for great deal!!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on January 30, 2009, 07:09:22 AM
Lion King costar's squalid decline and end
- Was there a conspiracy to stop his upcoming tell-all book, Timon Says?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on January 30, 2009, 01:43:48 PM
Hap Sing was a traditional girl, and her recent Masters degree in Finacial Management was never far from her mind.  Economic theory had taught her, "There's more than one way to skin a cat."  And it was so true because in fact there were two ways.  "Thank you, Suzhou Showing Love Activity School and Technical Institute," she said daily.

She often cried in her sleep.


The S.S. L.A.S.T (Suzhou Showing Love Activity School and Technical) Institute:  it's the last institute you'll ever want to go to!      -  The LAST Alumnus
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on January 30, 2009, 11:06:31 PM
The Supreme Ambassador of the Galactic Alliance naturally assumed that the most populous nation on Earth would be a good place to begin his goodwill tour to discuss how to prepare this young planet's civilization for the great benefits that Alliance membership would bring.  Sadly, his civet-like appearance led to a terrible misunderstanding when he tried to greet the first human he encountered.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on February 01, 2009, 05:32:56 AM
Sheesh! I only came in to have my nails trimmed. bibibibibi
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on February 11, 2009, 09:15:26 AM
One out of every three paramount leaders was in fact standing on a crate when the picture was taken.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: old34 on February 11, 2009, 09:47:23 AM
...as they applauded "The Changing of the Avatar".
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on February 11, 2009, 10:04:09 AM
"Find the Lady"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on February 11, 2009, 11:35:27 AM
Breaking news: last night in Shangdong province, three former Chinese leaders rose from the dead in giant form, then calmed terrified crowds by making shadow puppets on a nearby highrise apartment building.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on February 11, 2009, 03:04:31 PM
Coming soon... China's very own Mount Rushmore.  Stone carvers, please call the number below to submit your application.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on February 11, 2009, 04:15:02 PM
Scientists prove that China invented the Three Stooges.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on February 12, 2009, 07:01:55 AM
Introducing the starting line-up for the national 3-on-3 basketball team.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: synthette58 on February 12, 2009, 07:45:30 AM
hmmm....I don't recognise any of 'em - guess this will change, huh?

(Mount Lushmore?) ababababab
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: ericthered on February 12, 2009, 07:54:12 AM
My eyes may be deceiving me but I thought it was Mao, DengXiaoPing and...some chap...

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on February 12, 2009, 12:06:36 PM
"If you're happy and you know it--

You, guy with the glasses! In time with the music if you please.  And now ladies, once again from the top, a one and a two:

"And if you're ha...


Seniors. bibibibibi
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on February 12, 2009, 02:15:43 PM
My eyes may be deceiving me but I thought it was Mao, DengXiaoPing and...some chap...

Moe
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on February 12, 2009, 08:12:59 PM
hmmm....I don't recognise any of 'em

They are, of course, the original instrumentalists from the legendary band Led Zeppelin:
Mao Zedong (guitar),
Deng Xiaoping (bass),
and, uh...Keith Moon (drums).

Their attempted reunion tour fizzled badly, and they are now forced to play 4th-tier backwater cities in China, where they can at least get laid after the concert.

PS...yes, I know who the late John Bonham was. bfbfbfbfbf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on February 15, 2009, 02:41:19 AM
Photos, courtesy of Fifi"s strip club. bfbfbfbfbf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Spaghetti on February 15, 2009, 07:32:01 AM
When I saw the photo of the three guys what popped into my head was a trio of, "Helloooooooooo, HELLO, HELL-oh!" You know, like the opening of a Three Stooges short.

Then an old school, Melle Mel, "Now clap your hands everybody. Everybody Clap your hands. If you believe that you're the future everybody say 'OH YEAH.'"

The other was, "WARNING: GIANT MONSTERS ATTACK TIANJIN," but I didn't see a Toho studios logo to confirm that it was one of their daikaiju eiga.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: psd4fan on February 15, 2009, 12:19:01 PM
Y M C A it's fun to ...
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on March 17, 2009, 12:44:24 PM
Chicken re-birth trauma.  "Plastic egg worse than the life in the barnyard," reported Chicken X, "but oddly arousing.  I thought a lot about Mother Hen."

Morty Chang, pictured breastfeeding Baby Kyle, and Mildred Xavier-Li, seen here slipping fifty up her sleeve for later, were not watching porn.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on March 17, 2009, 02:14:04 PM
Aiyo. When I said I wanted to spice up our love life with a 'little chicken' three-some, this is not what I had in mind.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on March 17, 2009, 11:30:12 PM
Honestly Mr Conductor,she was too sick to leave home on her own today!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: DaDan on March 17, 2009, 11:40:53 PM
Why did the chicken ride the subway?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on March 17, 2009, 11:54:37 PM
Why did the chicken ride the subway?

Because she was too sick to be left at home on her own! uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Wags on March 18, 2009, 01:31:42 AM
OK I showed you my pecker, now lets see yours!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on March 18, 2009, 07:18:49 AM
People on the car enjoyed the screening of Lady and the Tramp, but Mabel couldn't handle all those dogs.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on March 18, 2009, 03:36:07 PM
Chickens on a subway are so common nowadays...but look at that laowai over there.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on March 18, 2009, 09:20:23 PM
As he rode home silently with his wife and baby, Mr. Liu reflected that he had been right in thinking that the new KFC "Many Fresh For You!" special had been suspiciously low-priced.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: synthette58 on March 21, 2009, 12:26:29 PM
"No way, officer!! We were assured we wouldn't need a ticket for a mongoose!....it's our supper!"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: DaDan on March 21, 2009, 03:27:51 PM
City Folk....
 bibibibibi
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on March 21, 2009, 09:10:29 PM
We don't need an extra ticket. Chicken is not taking up a seat!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: psd4fan on March 21, 2009, 10:11:21 PM
If a game of chicken shit bingo breaks out we're covered.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Bugalugs on March 21, 2009, 10:54:45 PM
"What??? You mean it's not a guide DOG?!?!?!?"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on March 22, 2009, 08:18:41 AM
Thanks to their amazing new service chicken, the Lius were finally able to navigate the Shanghai Metro with confidence.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Wags on March 22, 2009, 04:06:18 PM
Pay him no attention, he always comes home like this after a night on the piss  :alcoholic:
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: adamsmith on March 23, 2009, 12:43:58 AM
as madame zhou kept the little beast securely wrapped in the blanket for the protection of the other passengers, ernie, the faithful watch chicken sat secure in his plastic ninja outfit.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on March 23, 2009, 01:14:04 PM
OK, AdamS, you asked for it.

On the subway was gong-fu chicken
That bird was fast at peckin'
When I saw him with his women
It started my head a swimmin'
That's a funky flightless bird from funky guo qiao
Shakin' his head up and down, lookin' everybody up and down
Soon he had everybody cowed
To his ancient Chinese art we bowed
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on March 23, 2009, 03:25:30 PM
Red:  Uugh?

Yellow:  Ohn?

Chicken:  Meh. 


Mimes.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on March 25, 2009, 02:41:43 AM
Finally accepting that they could no longer keep both a baby and their beloved chicken in a tiny Chinese apartment, they rode in silence to the market, knowing the final battle over which to sell was looming inevitably before them.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: psd4fan on March 25, 2009, 02:48:03 PM
Oh shit. I hope that guy Raoul is looking at the chicken when he licks his lips like that. ananananan
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on June 30, 2009, 11:12:31 PM
Invading barbarian hordes always appreciated a nice fresh place to stop and "powder their noses" on their way to Beijing.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on June 30, 2009, 11:20:12 PM
A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.   ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Ruth on July 01, 2009, 02:10:08 AM
The new pic isn't working for me.  ananananan

Finally loaded. Now I can see it.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Borkya on July 01, 2009, 02:21:03 AM
Stil that picture is genius. You should get it made into a postcard and sit back as the dough rolls in.

I bow to your talent of observation.  bjbjbjbjbj
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on July 01, 2009, 02:23:55 AM
I don't think Stil actually took the pic. It's been around for a while.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Mr Nobody on July 01, 2009, 02:27:15 AM
So I gather you stand on the edge, and 'go' over the wall. But there's no toilet paper ....
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on July 01, 2009, 02:38:20 AM

I bow to your talent of observation.  bjbjbjbjbj


As you should but I observed the pic on the net. There's a watermark in the bottom right corner.

and if you are using the toilet .... watch out for that first step.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on July 01, 2009, 09:34:50 AM
Talk about "a mountain of bqbqbqbqbq"    ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Borkya on July 01, 2009, 05:22:06 PM


Aw well, forget it, no more admiration for Stil then.  kkkkkkkkkk

 ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on July 01, 2009, 06:20:08 PM
 cccccccccc
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on July 01, 2009, 08:01:36 PM
D'oh! I knew I shouldn't have drunk all those lattes at Starbucks before climbing the Wall.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on July 03, 2009, 01:14:38 AM
While we at it:

Exhibit 'A': (http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/stilavatar.png)   Exhibit 'B': (http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/sosabobble.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on July 03, 2009, 09:44:16 AM
But Sammy was juicing while I was beering.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on July 03, 2009, 09:13:23 PM
Well, yeah, but there's still the abnormal breast enlargement, the testicular shrinkage, the complete suppression of the sex drive, the random bursts of violent psychotic rage...different paths can still lead to the same destination. uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on August 04, 2009, 08:11:09 AM
I've heard about this mouth to mouth resuscitation, but this is the first time I've seen it done.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Newbs on August 04, 2009, 09:46:12 AM
Love today's avatar. bfbfbfbfbf
A bit of a play on words but, as I understand it, tongzhi (comrade) has come to mean homosexual, in much the same way as gay (happy) has come to mean it in English.
And none of this is meant to be homophobic.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 04, 2009, 04:15:07 PM
"See, I told you that if I made a wish under his portrait at sunrise, it would come true."   bjbjbjbjbj
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: solongtinik on August 05, 2009, 10:51:39 AM
hey! is this picture real? i thought this thing isnt allowed in china?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on August 05, 2009, 12:33:15 PM
Look closely at Yellow Jacket's jawline.....definitely masculine....even if his hair is a bit long. bhbhbhbhbh  She's just a controlling B**** ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Schnerby on August 05, 2009, 01:05:43 PM
I'd go with yellow coat being a man, but it's funnier to think it's a girl.

I reckon it wouldn't go down too well with the guards if I started pashing some girl right there. They don't even let you stop on the bridge to take pictures.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on August 05, 2009, 02:23:45 PM
"OMG!  Kyle kissed Kenny."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 06, 2009, 01:49:49 PM
“Mao Tse Tongue”   bpbpbpbpbp

Want to see the whole set?  I thought so.   ahahahahah

http://www.flickr.com/photos/63978244@N00/81351129/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/63978244@N00/81351131/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/63978244@N00/81351132/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/63978244@N00/81351133/


Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on August 23, 2009, 05:06:56 AM
Good Lord, Kenny let them put the Budweiser crown above his G.  What a whore.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 23, 2009, 02:43:20 PM
They didn't kill Kenny!  Those bastards!!!!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on August 23, 2009, 03:41:46 PM
All you can drink at a Kenny G show? Well I don't know...throw in some earplugs and I'll go.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on September 17, 2009, 07:54:46 AM
Dual-use handsfree mobile phone kit, for the car, around the home or in the office.  Doubles as an attractive and convenient replacement for that cumbersome fanny pack--store things on your head!  Don't leave home without it.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on September 17, 2009, 08:32:48 AM
Hey, Mom? The tooth feels better already. Thanks, Mom. What did you say I should do with it when I'm finished? Where?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on September 17, 2009, 08:56:31 AM
Having watched a translation of Weird Science, Feifei hooked up the Ken doll, hit "RUN PROGRAM" and prayed...
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 17, 2009, 09:47:52 AM
"Wearing my panties on my head was just soooo 1990's."


(Hey Raoul, what happened to that pic I sent you?  ananananan )
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: mlaeux on September 17, 2009, 01:19:59 PM
And now our newest Mouseketeer models the latest in Mouseketeer gear. M-I-C-K-E-Y M-O-U-S-E, Mickey Mouse! http://www.imeem.com/people/91_55Db/music/yGaSXE4U/micky-mouse-club-1955/ (http://www.imeem.com/people/91_55Db/music/yGaSXE4U/micky-mouse-club-1955/)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: psd4fan on September 19, 2009, 02:53:02 PM
Judging by the bra's cup size and her's the head is the only place that'll fit. kkkkkkkkkk
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on September 20, 2009, 02:35:06 AM
"Seems that you were right little sister,this is a really cool way to get noticed in this large office"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on September 20, 2009, 11:11:34 AM
(http://www.earthling-concerned.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/12/mao_zedong.jpg)

*Approves*
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on September 20, 2009, 01:20:34 PM
CP, looking at where the bumps are in your photo, don't you think the great helmsman would fill a B cup?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on September 20, 2009, 02:51:09 PM
Helmsman?  I thought it was David Carradine.  He was great in Kung Fu.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on September 26, 2009, 03:36:45 PM
You know your life has achieved some purpose when you are loved and respected and your passing is mourned by so many. We keep you in our hearts, Shroomy
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on September 27, 2009, 01:19:40 PM
We miss you, kiddo.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on January 06, 2010, 01:47:25 AM
The recently announced merger of FuddRuckers and Jack in the Box has caused some controversy.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on January 06, 2010, 01:50:36 AM
Yeah, that's the one. bfbfbfbfbf
Don't know if it'll play outside North America, though...but then, who cares about all those swarthy malodorous foreign types, anyway?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on January 06, 2010, 09:58:52 AM
(http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/450px-The_Thinker_close.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on January 06, 2010, 07:24:39 PM
Hmmm. Not sure why it's coming up here  mmmmmmmmmm but an explanation of the cryptic term is found at http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/HomePage (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/HomePage)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on January 07, 2010, 12:51:32 AM
Do you know how hard it is to find a linkable copy of Rodin's Thinker?  There's hundreds of them out there, and they're all on blogs.  *sigh*  So picture here a pleasant and appealing image, Rodin's Thinker, posed just so and facing right.  Perhaps we include the cryptic caption "...with Chinese characteristics", and we have our alt avatar joke.  Plus some indication that skinny white asian chicks with small, bushy tailed animals hidden in their hats are the future.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on January 07, 2010, 01:30:00 AM
skinny white asian chicks with small, bushy tailed animals hidden in their hats are the future.

We could do worse. afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Ruth on January 07, 2010, 02:04:43 AM
Good one, Calach.  Add the writing on the hat and it's perfect.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on January 10, 2010, 06:11:05 AM
After her third consecutive boyfriend came out of the closet, Feifei decided to lobby the public directly.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on February 21, 2010, 10:38:28 AM
The People's Liberation Army, Aviation branch, consisting of 400,000 personnel and 2,024 aircraft, practice daily their non-redundancy program.  Feats of sustained levitation are replacing the need for conventional aircraft, and allowing many recruits to stay in service.  The Navy has cried foul, claiming that if anyone should launch an assault across the strait there would be no face found in merely wafting across the water.  Undaunted, the brave aviators practice maintaining formation in the teeth of a pleasant breeze and last night's supper sitting heavily.  Tally ho, chaps!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: kitano on February 21, 2010, 03:04:36 PM
if all the people in china jumped in the air at the same time.....
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on February 21, 2010, 03:32:55 PM
Look, Ma.....No hands.....OR feet, neither ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on February 21, 2010, 04:37:14 PM
The Peter Pan try outs are going particularly well this year.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on February 22, 2010, 01:03:21 AM
"I float like a butterfly and sting like...." bfbfbfbfbf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: becster79 on February 22, 2010, 02:48:02 AM
I have nothing useful to say other than *lol ahahahahah ahahahahah ahahahahah ahahahahah lol* @ the pic!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Lotus Eater on February 22, 2010, 02:53:43 AM
It's the ballet, boys!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on February 22, 2010, 04:36:26 AM
Some in the military are a little light in the lofers.  The "don't ask, don't tell" policy may need a re-think.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: old34 on February 22, 2010, 01:35:17 PM
The first recruits from China's secret 100:100 Plan (designed to reduce China's female:male ratio of 119:100 by sending Chinese males abroad) take off from the flight deck of China's equally secret - and the world's first - Land-Based Aircraft Mancraft Carrier- launch  a rescue flight to save the Fleggaarde maidens falling from the sky along the German/Denmark border.

cf. http://raoulschinasaloon.com/index.php?topic=4883.0
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on February 22, 2010, 02:18:26 PM
Are Danish parachutes made in China too?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: old34 on February 22, 2010, 02:41:22 PM
Just the last one.

SPLASH!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on February 22, 2010, 02:58:09 PM
The People's Army Parachuting Team, shot at an amazing aperture setting, an eighth of a second before very messily failing a group formation descent.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: DaDan on April 08, 2010, 10:19:51 AM
I don't get this present pic?

I have to guess as to what it says (if that is the point?) in the banner, cannot read the Chinese & am left wondering....
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on April 08, 2010, 10:24:46 AM
Welcome to Nantong, Professor and students from Arthouse College for Drawing and Painting in Slovenia!....I think!
 Slovenia??...Well, at least it's an excuse for drinking, eating and partaying!! agagagagag agagagagag agagagagag agagagagag agagagagag
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: MK on April 08, 2010, 10:34:05 AM
Quote
I don't get this present pic?

I have to guess as to what it says (if that is the point?) in the banner, cannot read the Chinese & am left wondering....

Quote
it's an excuse for drinking, eating and partaying!!

Sounds like someone wasn't invited to the big shindig.  Have you ever seen an 80-something Slovenian professor go all out at KTV?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Borkya on April 08, 2010, 12:30:24 PM
Quote
it's an excuse for drinking, eating and partaying!!

Sounds like someone wasn't invited to the big shindig.  Have you ever seen an 80-something Slovenian professor go all out at KTV?

No, George is just digging out some high school humor:
What comes before Part B??
PART AAAAAAAAA!
 agagagagag
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on April 09, 2010, 12:38:42 AM
(http://www.shingobee.com/projectimages/mcdonalds.jpg)

Have it your way.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on April 09, 2010, 04:43:48 AM
Chateaux Ronalde.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on April 09, 2010, 07:13:09 AM
Although "Have It Your Way" was actually a slogan for...uh...well...Burger King. bibibibibi

The Point is actually sorta in the lack of a point...except for a chance for the local staff to eat, drink, and smoke like royalty for a night.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on April 09, 2010, 08:14:18 AM
...and on the inside:

(http://www.jasonbarbacovi.com/images/tacobell/tb03.jpg)

Yo quiero Nantong.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on April 09, 2010, 09:42:43 AM
aren't those the traffic cones on the roads during construction
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on April 09, 2010, 10:34:31 AM
(http://lolzombie.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/10/mcdonalds_abuse.jpg)

Say that again.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Mr Nobody on April 09, 2010, 11:31:10 AM
Now that was funny bkbkbkbkbk
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on April 21, 2010, 05:58:01 AM
(Any chance of posting the pics of the week in this thread so that we'll later know which comments went with which pic???)


Due to delays in construction of Today, Tomorrow has been rescheduled for early next week.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on April 21, 2010, 06:20:21 AM
Sorry, under construction... uuuuuuuuuu

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/underconst.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on April 21, 2010, 11:39:21 AM
Come back tomorrow and it will be done.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on April 21, 2010, 01:25:09 PM
You should have been here yesterday  mmmmmmmmmm
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on April 22, 2010, 12:57:52 AM
In that case, I'll go back to bed.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Mr Nobody on April 22, 2010, 02:07:46 AM
The "today is under contruction" avatar, plus Raoul's sig, "there is Chaos under heaven......"

Made me think of Brian:

"It's a sign! It's a sign!"

And for some reason, juniper.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on April 22, 2010, 08:36:17 AM
Today is under construction
The following week will be delayed.
Next year is ajar.
In years to come there will be a war.
If only we had some yesterdays.

-Anon
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on May 04, 2010, 08:26:27 AM
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/development.jpg)

Knock yerselves out, kids. uuuuuuuuuu
If I see a clear winner it may go on front! bfbfbfbfbf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on May 04, 2010, 08:30:23 AM
When Capitalism Says "Bend Over".....
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Fozzwaldus on May 04, 2010, 08:56:03 AM
 vvvvvvvvvv



Capitalism is a paper bear-pecker (So fill your short-shorts while you can)




(where the hell was this taken?)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on May 04, 2010, 09:02:56 AM
 kkkkkkkkkk Pic won't load! ananananan
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on May 04, 2010, 09:53:32 AM
William Wonka (known as Billy Bear when he dresses up) and the Development Loompah band perform "My Balls!" an operatic commentary on the clash between socialist and capitalist values and the emerging "soft" power of New China.

Bear (sings): My balls! My balls!
Development Loompahs: Your balls! Your balls!
Bear: Oh, my balls!
Development Loompahs: Where are your balls!
Bear: Where are my balls?

Widely regarded as a telling critique of Western society, "My Balls!" sums up many a common farmer's perception of our common global future, says Hu Jintao.

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on May 04, 2010, 03:43:06 PM
What the hell is that thing to the right of the bear?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on May 04, 2010, 04:10:54 PM
I've been trying to rack my brains with all the objects in this pic. Its so wierd on so many levels, anything I say won't add a thing    mmmmmmmmmm
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: psd4fan on May 04, 2010, 04:22:51 PM
"See? ? ? I told you he had no penis"  afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: fox on May 05, 2010, 12:03:47 AM
Perhaps something to do with the bear market - and all the chinese people bow to this new God.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Lone Traveller on May 05, 2010, 01:11:17 AM
(ok so i originally posted this in a place where no-one looks! my bad - lets try again)  bibibibibi

What is stuffed down the back of their shorts?!?!?! (on second thoughts, i dont think i want to know)...

my explanation:

We've got a few boys who watched one too many Mighty Duck movies and decided to pull a "flying V" on the big nasty bear who was blocking their path to the God of enlightenment, who just so happend at that time to be busy trying to teach his side-kick, Dog-of-God-of-Enlightenment, how to acutately portray the Greek God Poseidon. And as for the objects down the back of the shorts... well, i'll just let your mind wander on that one.  th_bf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on May 05, 2010, 01:44:04 AM
Shorts? I think they look more like diapers. East is Red Smuggies, or some such.
Wossname in the right background? That's 5000 year old dinosaur years of history and culture. Male genitalia? Please, this is in a public place. In China. It's just that you need a magnifying glass
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on May 05, 2010, 06:20:36 AM
Calach, I was eating my dinner while reading these, and yours made me laugh so hard I dropped my bowl. Only a quick last-minute grab averted total disaster. ahahahahah

I think My Balls!  would make a tremendous opera, and no mean allegory on life. bfbfbfbfbf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on May 05, 2010, 08:20:17 AM
Finally, I get to see the picture! ahahahahah There are some weird minds in China!
Bare-faced developers!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on May 07, 2010, 04:17:53 AM
WOW!!! No wonder he's mad. They were supposed to go for the Gall,not the Balls. bibibibibi
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on May 16, 2010, 12:03:12 PM
OK, kids...fresh meat. uuuuuuuuuu

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/hotcow.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: harry_aus on May 16, 2010, 03:57:53 PM
Hired to create a 'position vacant' sign at the new
restaurant, ming-Guo mistakenly-thought the boss told him to
include "nice, friendly coworkers".

(nahh, but on a similar-track):-

"Part-time English student and signwriter Wang, is forever
confusing 'new', with 'niu' when he gets verbal-instructions"

(I'm not doing well with this. I've only just tonight read Calach's
"My Balls" masterpiece!, and I've been laughing at that for over an hour! Can hardly type right-now!!)

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on May 17, 2010, 02:11:12 AM
That's not the original? How was I to know? All you big noses look the same to us.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 17, 2010, 05:09:54 AM
Come to McDonald's for some hot, fresh niubi!

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on May 17, 2010, 06:29:35 AM
I'll have nightmares.  That photo deeply disturbed me.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on May 17, 2010, 08:50:08 AM
I'm lovin' it...



...long time.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 17, 2010, 09:29:52 AM
There's something in the way she mooooves me.  ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on May 17, 2010, 10:18:05 AM
Wumba, Calach, you are on a roll here lately! bfbfbfbfbf ahahahahah bjbjbjbjbj agagagagag bkbkbkbkbk :respect:
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on May 17, 2010, 10:54:40 AM
Isn't it Marilyn Moooooonroe?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on May 17, 2010, 11:45:58 AM
There's something in the way she mooooves me.  ahahahahah

You know I'll be beevin' now.





Eww.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on May 17, 2010, 03:22:42 PM
Well, CP, your caption is amazing...clearly superior...and has replaced mine on the cover.

This is the first time in Saloon history this has ever happened. axaxaxaxax
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: MK on May 17, 2010, 03:45:51 PM
Tian-ah! That is even more creepy than it was before, if that's possible.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on May 17, 2010, 05:28:34 PM
Well, CP, your caption is amazing...clearly superior...and has replaced mine on the cover.

This is the first time in Saloon history this has ever happened. axaxaxaxax

Woohoo.  Touched.  Honoured.  Mooooved.  I'll be milking this for some time yet.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on May 17, 2010, 10:16:48 PM
Quote
I'll be milking this for some time yet.
Anudder win for Calach!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 17, 2010, 11:18:48 PM
McD's new spokesgirl denied rumors of genetically altered beef.

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on May 18, 2010, 02:19:57 AM
This has to be the most disturbing avatar the Saloon has put up since I've been here.  aaaaaaaaaa Is this Wes Craven's next horror film?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 18, 2010, 03:02:56 AM
Look!  It's the new pinup girl of the month in Montana.  ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 18, 2010, 05:09:04 AM
Soylent cows are made of people!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: fox on May 18, 2010, 08:52:45 AM
'a meal to die for'
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on May 18, 2010, 08:57:56 AM
Maid Cow Disease strikes again
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on May 18, 2010, 11:21:59 AM
You are what you eat


(I am a hamburger?)    kkkkkkkkkk
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on May 18, 2010, 06:07:56 PM
This has to be the most disturbing avatar the Saloon has put up since I've been here.  aaaaaaaaaa

I dunno, man...we had some pretty disturbing avatars.... uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 18, 2010, 11:56:22 PM
"My parents' love was a forbidden love." - Opening line of My life as a Cowgirl Supermodel by Bessie Larson
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on May 19, 2010, 10:39:33 AM
Even Bluegirls Get The Cows
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on May 20, 2010, 07:32:52 AM
There's something in the way she moos.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on May 20, 2010, 10:21:12 AM
Oooh. Good one, A-T. bkbkbkbkbk
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 20, 2010, 12:48:22 PM
There's something in the way she mooooves me.  ahahahahah

There's something in the way she moos.

Great minds thinking alike or imitation being the sincerest form of flattery?  mmmmmmmmmm
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on May 20, 2010, 01:50:19 PM
A-Train's is subtly different! bfbfbfbfbf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 21, 2010, 02:22:24 AM
A-Train's is subtly different! bfbfbfbfbf

As opposed to udderly different?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on May 21, 2010, 02:29:43 AM
As opposed to udderly different?

That was sour, are you crying over spilled milk?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 21, 2010, 04:13:21 AM
As opposed to udderly different?

That was sour, are you crying over spilled milk?

Nah, just milking it for more posts (until the cows come home).  ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on May 21, 2010, 08:32:12 AM
As long as you're not beefing about it
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on May 21, 2010, 02:12:57 PM
I'm surprised no one's asked yet. Where's the beef?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on May 21, 2010, 02:16:24 PM
I've got your beef buddy, right here      auauauauau
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Invictus on May 21, 2010, 05:28:42 PM
There's something in the way she moos.

Bwhahaha! Brilliant!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: teleplayer on May 21, 2010, 07:11:23 PM

I have to agree A-T has the winner for famous descriptive phrases among the several that were good

There's something in the way she moos.

But......

I also agree with China-Matt that even for this group of depraved refugees
there is something just inherently wrong with this photo
This has to be the most disturbing avatar the Saloon has put up since I've been here.  aaaaaaaaaa
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on May 21, 2010, 09:07:48 PM
Quote
I also agree with China-Matt that even for this group of depraved refugees
there is something just inherently wrong with this photo
Yeah. I reckon it's been photoshopped!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: fox on May 22, 2010, 12:52:20 AM
 bkbkbkbkbk
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on May 22, 2010, 01:15:15 AM
That's our George, a keen sense of the obvious
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on May 22, 2010, 10:07:53 AM
[Yeah. I reckon it's been photoshopped!

I wouldn't be so sure. I don't think it was... mmmmmmmmmm

Of course, I always reckon that Gerge has been Photoshopped. uuuuuuuuuu ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 23, 2010, 03:15:41 AM
I avoid McD's like it's a plaguehouse, but am tempted to wander through one or two to see if I can find the original.

Anyone else want to do some checking?  Maybe some of you who can speak Chinese could take a copy of the pic and ask employees if they ever saw a poster exactly like that.  Let's see if we can hunt this down and verify if it's real or photoshopped.



BTW - I just saw another hat like the one the girl on the train was wearing (F**k in the Box) for sale in Dongguan yesterday.  I guess hers wasn't a custom one.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on May 26, 2010, 01:44:35 AM
don't know if this has been the most disturbing avatar of the week, but it has certainly provoked a good many comments. Now can we change it, please? I'm starting to see Normoo Jean in my sleep, fer Fecksakes.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on May 28, 2010, 10:53:26 AM
As you wish. bjbjbjbjbj

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/wacko.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on May 28, 2010, 11:00:54 AM
Springer!

Springer!

Springer!

Hi Jerry, this is the new lover I dropped the transvestite sock-puppet street performer who was my cousin for. It was love at first site. Plus, we wear the same clothes
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: harry_aus on May 28, 2010, 11:27:49 AM
A Team America puppet-hat - with balls?
hmm...will have to go and think about this one...


"Enter with Drag-On"   ?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on May 28, 2010, 02:51:40 PM
Jackie Chan stars in Jon Waters' newest film "Everyone was Cross-Dress Fighting."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: mlaeux on May 28, 2010, 03:12:48 PM
Quote
Jackie Chan stars in Jon Waters' newest film "Everyone was Cross-Dress Fighting."


 bkbkbkbkbk
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: psd4fan on May 28, 2010, 03:15:46 PM
"It's fun to be a part of the C P P C C" With apologies to the Village People. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: rollerboogie on May 28, 2010, 04:30:33 PM
Are you sure that pic was snapped China? The red banner in the background resembles the sales banners you'd find in Japan. It's so cropped it's hard to tell. If it is China, where can I get the DEVO hat with Saddham Hussein on it?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Invictus on May 28, 2010, 08:36:42 PM
"Adriaaan!"

"Nothing gets between a puppet and its bike."

"Beam me up, Scottie."

"I should've said 'yes' to Karate Kid 4."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on May 29, 2010, 10:53:11 AM
"It's fun to be a part of the C P P C C" With apologies to the Village People. ahahahahah
bkbkbkbkbk

I'm pretty sure it's from China. The banner's style is indeed Japanese...and can be seen outside Japanese "Ajisen" noodle shops all over China... mmmmmmmmmm
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on May 29, 2010, 10:58:11 AM
"Among flowers, the cherry blossom; Among men, the samurai."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on May 29, 2010, 01:14:11 PM
and among fruitcakes?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on May 30, 2010, 02:57:55 AM
I GOTTA BE ME!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Fozzwaldus on May 30, 2010, 10:10:22 AM
Poster Boy for SanLu Milk Powder
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on May 31, 2010, 02:40:47 AM
While China has long held a permissive policy towards abortion, this outfit was widely agreed to have crossed the line.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 31, 2010, 04:02:15 AM
"I hereby swear to uphold the dignity of the office of the Presidency of the United States."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on June 03, 2010, 07:33:39 AM
Which way to San Francisco.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: BrandeX on June 17, 2010, 03:51:13 PM
Are you sure that pic was snapped China? The red banner in the background resembles the sales banners you'd find in Japan. It's so cropped it's hard to tell. If it is China, where can I get the DEVO hat with Saddham Hussein on it?
The banner is in hirigana (japanese), but everything/everyone else in the pic looks Chinese.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on June 23, 2010, 11:45:32 AM
Okay, it's been over a month now and this freak has to go


 aaaaaaaaaa
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on June 23, 2010, 12:25:18 PM
yeah, yeah...OK...I been shopping for a replacement already...
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on June 24, 2010, 05:17:43 AM
Awright, already, a new cover photo...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/ExecutioninProgress.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on June 24, 2010, 05:26:23 AM
Tickets - 5 yuan.
Front row seats - 10 yuan.
Press the button or pull the trigger - 100 yuan.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on June 24, 2010, 07:01:54 AM
Bring yer own ratfucker FAO, priceless
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on June 24, 2010, 07:40:15 AM
Slippery floor.   You don't want to know why.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on June 24, 2010, 08:03:03 AM
Friends on the right, family to the left

and please don't worry, that really is red paint on the walls
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on June 24, 2010, 09:01:47 AM
Madness?  This. Is. CHINAAAAA!

*kick*
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on July 12, 2010, 07:35:47 AM
Well, OK...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/luckygrass.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on July 12, 2010, 08:38:42 AM
And thus, with the help of some cleverly written signs, the Invasion of the Body Snatchers advances into China.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: old34 on July 12, 2010, 09:21:15 AM
Tag Question-FAIL
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on July 12, 2010, 10:57:17 AM
China invents the spearmint leaf. 

And asserts international copyright.

Cutely.



aaaaaaaaaa
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on August 09, 2010, 07:52:42 AM
Et voila...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/rvbike.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 09, 2010, 09:11:38 AM
ROTFLMFAO!!!!  Where do I get one of these?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Fozzwaldus on August 09, 2010, 12:48:00 PM
yeah, I've got no witty slogan to add... but that is just the coolest f*cking thing I've ever seen.

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: BrandeX on August 09, 2010, 01:43:23 PM
ROTFLMFAO!!!!  Where do I get one of these?
Your nearest Photoshop retailer would be my guess. I am unsure if real pickup campers even exist in China.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: old34 on August 09, 2010, 03:04:39 PM
Movin' on up. To the east side.

(note the envy in the eyes of that westbound trike.)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on August 09, 2010, 04:05:42 PM
The only thing that would have made it perfect would have been a "ROOM FOR RENT" sign
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on August 09, 2010, 09:38:38 PM
Trailers for sale or rent
Rooms to let, 50 cents
No phone, no pool, no pets
Ain't got no cigarettes.

But 2 hours of pushin' a broom
Buys a 12 by 8 4-bit room
I'm a man of means by no means,
King of the road.

(If that's photoshopped, they did a good job on the shadows.)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on August 09, 2010, 11:36:07 PM
Pink lights at fellas
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Ruth on August 10, 2010, 12:58:26 AM
I also have no cute comment and I also think it's real because of the shadows.  That is the most unusual thing I've seen on a bicycle.  Even on a 3 wheeler, that's gotta be quite a load.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 10, 2010, 01:37:16 AM
The girl of my dreams promised to marry me as soon as I bought a house.  bjbjbjbjbj
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on August 10, 2010, 06:40:53 AM
No, she said she'd marry me as soon as I got a house. She didn't say I couldn't steal it.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Nolefan on August 10, 2010, 07:05:00 AM
faced with a rent increase crisis, Beijing's nongmin turned to their American brethren for help! This first ever cooperation was deemed successful effort and will go a long way into improving sino-us relations. The seeds are sewn for further joint ventures including resuscitating John Denver, Karen Carpenter and Garth Brooks' comeback concert   
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 10, 2010, 08:00:07 AM
Another fine (and not pirated) product of the Wniabaga Corporation.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Ruth on August 10, 2010, 10:49:20 AM
The next step in the cooperation will be figuring out a way to hook a 5th wheel to a bicycle.  (I'm traveling in the States atm and seeing these huge things often on the interstates. Lotsa people 'camping' without tents these days.)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: BrandeX on August 10, 2010, 10:55:03 AM
Negative!

The shadow is where you can tell the truth.

The other shadows are straight down like it's high noon, but the shopped camper has a perfectly "camper shaped" shadow projected to the side of the bicycle, instead of being distorted like if the light was actually from the side, or a kind of square blob under the bike and not to the side if the light source was directly overhead like the other shadows in the picture. Not to mention the idea that it is real is simply ridiculous as it would be rather cramped for a midget.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on August 10, 2010, 11:25:35 AM
Quote
The shadow is where you can tell the truth.
Perzakkly!
The shadows are a dead giveaway. The shadows of the bikes and the power pole are going from right to left. The shadows on the camper are going from left to right.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 11, 2010, 03:28:45 AM
Quote
The shadow is where you can tell the truth.
Perzakkly!
The shadows are a dead giveaway. The shadows of the bikes and the power pole are going from right to left. The shadows on the camper are going from left to right.

Not so sure I agree.  The camper's top extends forward and there are one or more shadows from objects behind the camera crossing it that make it a little harder to be certain.  From what I can tell, the shadow of the front edge of the camper (above the driver's head) looks to be noticeably to the left. The shadows on the driver seem to be about where I would expect them to be.

If our illustrious leader could post the source, maybe there are more pics.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: MK on August 11, 2010, 04:46:35 AM
'Tis art, my friends;  Camper Bike (http://www.kevincyr.net/index.php?/project/camper-bike/) by Kevin Cyr (http://www.kevincyr.net) .
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: BrandeX on August 11, 2010, 01:24:32 PM
Aha, so much for my shadow theory! Lol, anyway art I can accept, no way something that small would be functional for normal use.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on August 11, 2010, 02:14:07 PM
No room for the Vietnamese family in the basement
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 12, 2010, 06:23:54 AM
So, it's a real pic of a mockup. (I knew those shadows were in the right place.  yyyyyyyyyy)

Step 2.  Build a functional one.  agagagagag
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: NATO on August 12, 2010, 05:56:13 PM
I'm housin'
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: mlaeux on August 12, 2010, 09:51:59 PM
Well, I was fooled, but it doesn't take much to do that.  ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Ruth on August 15, 2010, 01:17:09 AM
MK, thanks for the link.  Is that a picture of Mao on the wall in the 10th photo of the series?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on August 16, 2010, 02:55:49 AM
Aww, youse guys is about as much fun as a barium enema. uuuuuuuuuu

Anyway: the new entry...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/civilized_tourists.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on August 16, 2010, 03:05:37 AM
The Chinese, of course, being such pre-eminent judges of "civilized behavior". ::)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Invictus on August 16, 2010, 03:33:10 AM
"Be nice or the panda gets it."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 16, 2010, 09:12:47 AM
Civilized behavior of tourists is another bright scenery.
Uncivilized behavior of foreign tourists will result in bright punishment.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on August 24, 2010, 10:35:16 AM
Oooh, look, kids! Fresh meat!
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/hardest.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: MK on August 24, 2010, 02:36:43 PM
Take one of each in case the other is a knock off.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on August 24, 2010, 04:37:51 PM

More expesinve here

(http://i11.photobucket.com/albums/a197/Bissessar/c3f4564e.png)

We 'ain't got any of that 36 hours long lasting stuff.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on August 24, 2010, 05:01:22 PM
If erections last more than four hours....CALL MORE WOMEN!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on August 24, 2010, 05:12:59 PM

If erections last more than four hours....CALL MORE WOMEN!


This is why dormitories come in 6-12 packs.  uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on August 25, 2010, 08:26:32 AM
Seeing the world through azure colored glasses.


(And avoiding strong breezes in public places.)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Fozzwaldus on August 25, 2010, 09:03:45 AM
Seeing the world through azure colored glasses.


(And avoiding strong breezes in public places.)

huh? mmmmmmmmmm the breezes I get, but the glasses?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on August 25, 2010, 09:32:38 AM
I guess this dates me, but...
Quote
Did you ever have to make up your mind
Pick up on one and leave the other behind
It's not often easy and not often kind
Did you ever have to make up your mind
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on August 25, 2010, 10:19:02 AM
huh? mmmmmmmmmm the breezes I get, but the glasses?

A sometime reported side effect of Viagra is blue-tinted vision.

For that reason, pilots are not allowed to "take the blue pill" within 12 hours of flying.  

That, and the whole "driving stick" thing.  Planes are all automatic these days but pilots on Viagra have been known to have bursts of hubris and attempt complicated maneuvers without assistance.  As the saying goes, they get cocky.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on August 25, 2010, 02:48:52 PM
Wow...and that more expensive Viagra isn't even the "hardest"!!! bibibibibi

This is why dormitories come in 6-12 packs.  uuuuuuuuuu

You scare me, man, you really do. You are one disturbed mo'fo. oooooooooo
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 26, 2010, 12:44:04 AM
Mr. Wang had to think long and hard about such a big choice.  Finally, he made a firm decision.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 26, 2010, 05:40:51 AM
Naaaahhh... that last one didn't work so well.  Let me try to other pill and see if I can get better results:


Comrade Wang was an upstanding party member who had long been known as a hard liner.  He was a man who could be counted on to ram things through a committee.  If anyone dared to raise an objection, he could always raise a bigger one.  Even if it took all day and all night, he'd keep pounding and pounding until he was completely satisfied.

Some found him wooden.  A few thought he was over-inflated.  Many felt that he was too stiff.  Others were happy that he was so solid where it really counted.

Until recently, he always upheld policies and made the firmest of decisions.  Then he slowly started to become more flexible, acting more like a sapling than a mighty tree, falling to the side when he should be thrusting forward.

Finally, a cure was found.  Comrade Wang has returned to rigidly lifting the party's banner.

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on August 26, 2010, 06:41:02 AM
EL, when it comes to writing, you certainly hold a rigid standard.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 26, 2010, 10:31:39 AM
EL, when it comes to writing, you certainly hold a rigid standard.

That's because I firmly grip my standard with both hands.  afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on August 27, 2010, 01:50:57 AM
Naaaahhh... that last one didn't work so well.  Let me try to other pill and see if I can get better results:


Comrade Wang was an upstanding party member who had long been known as a hard liner.  He was a man who could be counted on to ram things through a committee.  If anyone dared to raise an objection, he could always raise a bigger one.  Even if it took all day and all night, he'd keep pounding and pounding until he was completely satisfied.

Some found him wooden.  A few thought he was over-inflated.  Many felt that he was too stiff.  Others were happy that he was so solid where it really counted.

Until recently, he always upheld policies and made the firmest of decisions.  Then he slowly started to become more flexible, acting more like a sapling than a mighty tree, falling to the side when he should be thrusting forward.

Finally, a cure was found.  Comrade Wang has returned to rigidly lifting the party's banner.




The story built up well, but the climax was not what I was hoping for. It could have been more explosive, earth shattering, take my breath away. As for your writing style, were you in a fraternity called "Pappa Cum Loudly"?

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 27, 2010, 02:37:12 AM
The story built up well, but the climax was not what I was hoping for. It could have been more explosive, earth shattering, take my breath away. As for your writing style, were you in a fraternity called "Pappa Cum Loudly"?

My frat was I Felta Thigh, but I graduated Cum Loudly when I got my degree studying hard rocks.

Let me see if I can finish off that story in a more fulfilling way for everyone. . .

Finally, a cure was found.  Comrade Wang burst back onto the scene.  With unbelievable stamina, he lifted the party's banner to new heights, causing even the most reserved party members to cry out in utter satisfaction as he used his restored prowess to bring all issues to an amazingly harmonious conclusion.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on August 27, 2010, 10:24:20 AM
My frat was I Felta Thigh, but I graduated Cum Loudly when I got my degree studying hard rocks.

Let me see if I can finish off that story in a more fulfilling way for everyone. . .

Finally, a cure was found.  Comrade Wang burst back onto the scene.  With unbelievable stamina, he lifted the party's banner to new heights, causing even the most reserved party members to cry out in utter satisfaction as he used his restored prowess to bring all issues to an amazingly harmonious conclusion.


After which, as they all smoked a satisfying cigarette, he asked them if his policies were as good for them as it was for him.


b'dee, b'dee, b'dee, that's all folks
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on August 30, 2010, 03:33:16 AM
Oh, you kids!... bibibibibi
Speaking of which, here's the new one...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/dontscore.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 30, 2010, 07:12:35 AM
Due to repeated incidents, this warning marker was placed in front of the gate to Yao Ming's middle school basketball court.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on August 30, 2010, 07:38:00 AM
I really had no idea she was that old. In my defence, she has really nice legs.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on September 01, 2010, 04:09:30 AM
I think it's in reference to the Chinese Woman's Hockey team goalie. In her prime she was good, but now she's old and not a good goalie anymore. She was once known as the "Great Wall of China" goaltender, Guo Hong
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on September 06, 2010, 02:58:37 PM
And here 'tis for this week...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/badbridge.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on September 06, 2010, 03:08:14 PM
Hey dad, pay the extra damn 2 kwai and let's take the good bridge!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on September 06, 2010, 05:23:11 PM
From left to right: Tito, Latoya, Marlon, Jermaine, Michael (and son).
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: fox on September 07, 2010, 12:03:30 AM
chinese tea pickers risking life, limb and child to ensure the morning brew continues to flow.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 07, 2010, 01:07:20 AM
Mayor Chen proudly announced that the recent upgrades made the bridge the safest in the region.  After the ceremonial walk by the mayor and his family, the bridge reopened to truck traffic.


Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on September 07, 2010, 01:32:08 AM
After enough generations the clumsy had eliminated themselves from the gene pool, and soon to everyone's amazement tiny, backwards Island Village grew prosperous from the famous and celebrated dancers, acrobats, and bomb-squad technicians it produced.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on September 07, 2010, 03:17:07 AM
In some places the proper use of electrical lines is poorly understood.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on September 07, 2010, 03:21:04 AM
We are proud to present the new Terrorist Proof Bridge. Now with no place to plant a bomb.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on September 07, 2010, 05:35:18 AM
China leading the way in ecological engineering - wooden bridges with no wood, reducing the number of tree cut down. It also makes money!

Posted sign reads:

Quote
If you fall to your death, your family will receive a littering ticket and will be made to clean the mess!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on September 07, 2010, 06:01:01 AM
Wait till we find the bastard who keeps stealing the decking!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: NATO on September 07, 2010, 06:25:36 AM
After all that the villagers were horrified to find that upon closer inspection, the grass actually wasn't greener on this side.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on September 07, 2010, 07:25:08 AM
After all that the villagers were horrified to find that upon closer inspection, the grass actually wasn't greener on this side.

Okay, we have a winner    bfbfbfbfbf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: old34 on September 07, 2010, 07:27:45 AM
Vertigo Bridge
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 07, 2010, 08:08:54 AM
Ungrateful bastards complaining about a couple of missing planks!  Back in my day, wooden planks hadn't even been invented yet and there was only a tightrope you had to balance on to get across the river - and it was a 45 degree angle uphill both ways.  bgbgbgbgbg
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on September 08, 2010, 03:23:07 AM
Why did the village cross the bridge?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 08, 2010, 04:44:26 AM
Why did the village cross the bridge?

Because it was there.

To promote a better society by eliminating the weak and the clumsy.  uuuuuuuuuu

Crossing the bridge was safer than dealing with the local roads.

To buy dog meat on sale at the WalMart in the next village.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on September 08, 2010, 05:10:34 AM
...and this is the handicapped-accessible section.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Crippler on September 08, 2010, 06:27:59 AM
Hold on dad, I'll get you across safely..
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 13, 2010, 07:03:27 AM
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/chinabeach3.jpg)

As clearly shown in this photo, crowds at the beach are only a fraction of what was expected. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on September 13, 2010, 09:12:19 AM
And thanks for remembering for me to post the pic here. bjbjbjbjbj
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 13, 2010, 09:39:05 AM
Breaking news - a new wave of Cuban refugees washes up on Miami Beach after Raoul Castro lifts the ban on inner-tube sales.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on September 13, 2010, 09:55:53 AM
It was certainly no day-at-the-beach.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: fox on September 13, 2010, 12:39:41 PM
debris
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on September 14, 2010, 01:32:30 AM
It's alright, folks. It's only a candy-bar!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Just Like Mr Benn on September 14, 2010, 05:12:04 AM
It was when my partner suggested this moment to go skinnydipping that I began to wonder if they were too much of an exhibitionist.

OR

The innaugeral triathlon attracted a higher than anticipated number of entrants.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 20, 2010, 04:12:50 AM
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/hypnotoad2.png)

ALL GLORY TO THE HYPNOTOAD!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: adamsmith on September 20, 2010, 04:51:31 AM
duh' Lick Me. For I am the mighty Hypnotoad. afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on September 20, 2010, 09:17:55 AM
Thanks again, Looney. bjbjbjbjbj
Raoulus interruptus...had to run out to early Mass and then to the feared and loathed second leg of my pretty-much-mandatory double shift (It's high profits NFL season, so All Hands On Deck (and no, I'm NOT talking like a pirate.......am I? :wtf: ) for some time to come. Lots of sweet, sweet OT (especially on a weekend afternoon axaxaxaxax ) and turned out to be the easiest money I ever made (outside of China uuuuuuuuuu ) and I managed to stay tweeeeeeeeeked enough to get through it still mean and kickin'.

So now it's 3:48am Monday morning, and I haven't slept since Friday afternoon. I'd love to sleep, but I dare not: This is Bat Country, and the filthy blood-sucking bastards won't stop dive-bombing my bed. asasasasas  So I went and did my huge load of reeking laundry and chatted up the poor nice young Native American laundromat attendant until her head was about to asplode and she was, like, an hour late getting off work. I think I finally got out of there before she pulled out the Mace, but for the last few hours I suppose anything was possible...I'm wearing a scent that I don't recognize and that is making my eyes hurt. Now, I'm typing here and listen to really obtuse music (Currently playing- King Missile's Detachable Penis ("I can rent it out when I don't need it!") and then Fu Manchu's massive Mongoose) Next: I may take my cup of Canadian Night Crawlers (i.e. enormous mutant earthworms who can't say the word "about" properly) out of the fridge and, if they still alive, go troll my apartment complex's lake for Bottom-Dwelling Sewer Eel (and possibly the dreaded Batfish as well). Then, who knows...perhaps I'll go find a diner with a jukebox playing Ferlin Husky and Patsy Cline records and terrorize the place with my steel ruler while guzzling coffee I certainly don't need and picking listlessly at the Grits 'n' Gravy I don't want in the first place and screaming at the goddam bats until the local contingent of farmers, truck drivers, and refinery roustabouts conspire together to administer me un sedativo ("brutal beating").

Well, I gotta do somethin'  with a one-and-a-half-day off.... uuuuuuuuuu

Now it's Chamillionaire's hip-hop classic, Ridin' Dirty....
"They see me rollin'
 They hate it
 Patrolling and tryin' to catch me ridin' dirty
 Trying to catch me ridin' dirty, trying to catch me ridin' dirty....
 My music's so loud
 I'm swingin'
 They hopin' they gonna catch me ridin' dirty
 Trying to catch me ridin' dirty, trying to catch me ridin' dirty...."

Anyway, I digress.
Adamsmith, don't get this wrong...I know you to be a true mensch and a Major Dude. But I serve The Hypnotoad. I know The Hypnotoad. The Hypnotoad is a friend of mine. Senator, you're no Hypnotoad. kkkkkkkkkk

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/hypnotoad3.gif)
All Glory to The Hypnotoad.

The Gorillaz' Clint Eastwood  is now filling the bill. Thanks again, Dr. Con. bjbjbjbjbj akakakakak
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: adamsmith on September 20, 2010, 10:35:04 AM
isn't the hypnotoad one of those hallucinogenic guys that homer simpson was so fond of.
Just take another taste and you won't need the coffee el jefe. uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on September 20, 2010, 11:42:18 AM
Close, but wrong Matt Groening creation. The Hypnotoad appears on Futurama, which is now back in production (for Comedy Central) and which I've come to love even more than latter seasons of The Simpsons. akakakakak

According to Wikipedia, in its separate entry on recurring Futurama  characters:

The Hypnotoad
"The Hypnotoad is a large toad with pulsating, multicolored eyes which emit a loud, ominous buzzing noise. It has the power to hypnotize almost any living thing at will, even mass numbers of creatures. The Hypnotoad first appeared in "The Day the Earth Stood Stupid", in which it hypnotized a flock of sheep to herd themselves into a pen and close the door behind them, a panel of judges to win a pet show, then the audience of that pet show to force their approval of that victory. It has since acquired its own television show <within Futurama -R >, Everybody Loves Hypnotoad, in which it hypnotizes the audience. The Futurama: Bender's Big Score DVD includes a full 22-minute episode. The episode mainly features The Hypnotoad staring into the camera, occasionally intercut with a laugh track or shots of the exteriors of various locations to indicate a scene change. The finale of the show consists of a voiceover telling the audience that they will wake up remembering nothing and feeling refreshed, and the credits are all attributed to The Hypnotoad."

Fry, sometimes with others, is sometimes shown watching The Hypnotoad. Effects tend to inducing a completely mindless drooling state, through which The Hypnotoad sends his subconscious commands of world domination.
You know...much like most real TV today... bibibibibi
Leela has been known to walk in and suddenly turn off the TV with a disgusted look at Fry, causing Fry to snap out of it and scream "Hey! I was watching that!"

If you want to fully experience the glory of The Hypnotoad, you can see the full 22-minute episode of Everybody Loves HYPNOTOAD at http://rds.yahoo.com/_ylt=A0SO8ZwoRZdMK2QAXnD7w8QF;_ylu=X3oDMTB1Y2k4Y2x2BHBvcwMzBHZ0aWQDVjExNwRzbGsDcmVzBHNlYwNzcg--/SIG=1kt6olqcf/EXP=1285068456/**http%3a//video.search.yahoo.com/video/play%3fei=UTF-8%26fr=yfp-t-701%26p=hypnotoad%26vid=160678084900%26dt=1196928000%26l=1321%26turl=http%253A%252F%252Fts1.mm.bing.net%252Fvideos%252Fthumbnail.aspx%253Fq%253D160678084900%2526id%253D63fe4e06e59c4cbb3505cddb55e3d7ad%2526bid%253Du%25252fenJ04dDLosxQ%2526bn%253DThumb%2526index%253Dch1%2526url%253Dhttp%25253a%25252f%25252fvids.myspace.com%25252findex.cfm%25253ffuseaction%25253dvids.individual%252526videoid%25253d23448041%26rurl=http%253A%252F%252Fvids.myspace.com%252Findex.cfm%253Ffuseaction%253Dvids.individual%2526videoid%253D23448041%26tit=Everybody%2bLoves%2bHypnotoad%26sigr=12duh0f7i%26newfp=1 (http://rds.yahoo.com/_ylt=A0SO8ZwoRZdMK2QAXnD7w8QF;_ylu=X3oDMTB1Y2k4Y2x2BHBvcwMzBHZ0aWQDVjExNwRzbGsDcmVzBHNlYwNzcg--/SIG=1kt6olqcf/EXP=1285068456/**http%3a//video.search.yahoo.com/video/play%3fei=UTF-8%26fr=yfp-t-701%26p=hypnotoad%26vid=160678084900%26dt=1196928000%26l=1321%26turl=http%253A%252F%252Fts1.mm.bing.net%252Fvideos%252Fthumbnail.aspx%253Fq%253D160678084900%2526id%253D63fe4e06e59c4cbb3505cddb55e3d7ad%2526bid%253Du%25252fenJ04dDLosxQ%2526bn%253DThumb%2526index%253Dch1%2526url%253Dhttp%25253a%25252f%25252fvids.myspace.com%25252findex.cfm%25253ffuseaction%25253dvids.individual%252526videoid%25253d23448041%26rurl=http%253A%252F%252Fvids.myspace.com%252Findex.cfm%253Ffuseaction%253Dvids.individual%2526videoid%253D23448041%26tit=Everybody%2bLoves%2bHypnotoad%26sigr=12duh0f7i%26newfp=1)

Max the sound and watch the eyes. uuuuuuuuuu Try to hang for at least around 7 mins...sure, of course it's mostly The Hypnotoad, but there are some commercials and some stock-network-sitcom-type segues thrown in throughout, including a glimpse of my favorite newscaster, Morbo.
And let me know if you can't see this in China...I'll keep trying. vvvvvvvvvv

It's definitely Must-See TV. I find myself compelled to watch it often. :respect:
When it's over, you will awaken feeling refreshed and remembering nothing, I promise you.
All Glory to The Hypnotoad.

Meanwhile, Adam, I did and I don't. agagagagag
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on September 20, 2010, 02:20:12 PM
isn't the hypnotoad one of those hallucinogenic guys that homer simpson was so fond of.
Just take another taste and you won't need the coffee el jefe. uuuuuuuuuu

I believe you're thinking of the real toads that get you high when licked.  Homer was stuck on their island for some reason.  When asked, "Are you licking toads again, Homer?", responded with.."I'm not,not licking toads".

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on September 20, 2010, 04:09:20 PM
Hmmmm....know about the toad-licking thing, of course (never tried it, but long ago DID smoke some banana peels... acacacacac ) but didn't know the connection to Homer. There's still a LOT of Simpsons  episodes I have yet to see... ananananan

As for Another Taste and not needing more coffee, I was in a totally different conversation, which I guess forms a classic G-E-B self-referential recursion. uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on September 28, 2010, 04:40:30 AM
Hey, I remembered this time. Smoke 'em if you got 'em. uuuuuuuuuu

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/cigmachine.jpg)


Meanwhile, did anyone in China try the Hypnotoad video? I'm curious about whether you can see it or not...
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 28, 2010, 04:47:26 AM
Meanwhile, did anyone in China try the Hypnotoad video? I'm curious about whether you can see it or not...

I remember typing in the url, but can't recall anything else for the rest of the day.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on September 28, 2010, 12:14:43 PM
I thought I was the only one to see one of these cigarette claw machines. It was in one of the "old" areas of Shenzhen.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on October 05, 2010, 09:01:40 AM
Here this week's...
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/hospital_sign.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on October 05, 2010, 09:33:10 AM
Excuuuuse me, but which way for the Lunitic Fringe?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on October 06, 2010, 03:27:36 AM
An imaginative book report about the Canterbury Tales.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 06, 2010, 05:51:59 AM
Excuuuuse me, but which way for the Lunitic Fringe?

No particular direction.  Us Lunatics keep our fringes all over the place. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on October 06, 2010, 10:09:02 AM
*off topic*

I'm confused mmmmmmmmmm Since when does Mandarin have "the" definite article?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on October 06, 2010, 10:47:44 AM
*off topic*

I'm confused mmmmmmmmmm Since when does Mandarin have "the" definite article?

It doesn't

They're not translating each character for example the first one says

老   年   人

lǎo nián rén

Old Year People
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on October 06, 2010, 07:19:45 PM
 bjbjbjbjbj Thank you agagagagag
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: xwarrior on October 07, 2010, 01:03:11 AM

Quote
Excuuuuse me, but which way for the Lunitic Fringe?

This 'map' may help. I think you will find your office on F5.

PS You will have to put your money where your stoma is
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on October 07, 2010, 02:18:14 AM
Nothing like a good Map of Fools. Now I know where my office is located
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on October 07, 2010, 04:15:17 AM

The old people, the baby, the patient, the deformed man, the pregnant woman arrive at a passenger lately.



Two men walk into a bar.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on October 11, 2010, 12:34:55 PM
I like that. bjbjbjbjbj

I also like this:
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/bottleseat.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on October 11, 2010, 12:37:41 PM
"Sure, Moxibustion can be used to treat hemorrhoids..."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on October 12, 2010, 01:45:40 AM
RD, where oh where did you get this? Even by the most jaded "'nother China moment" standards, this one is a beaut!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on October 12, 2010, 04:24:42 AM
Binoculars.

I can see the sunshine!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 12, 2010, 04:45:19 AM
Jar Squatter II, Squat Harder
 aoaoaoaoao aoaoaoaoao aoaoaoaoao aoaoaoaoao
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on October 12, 2010, 05:17:40 AM
The bottles were empty when he first sat down.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on October 12, 2010, 06:07:25 AM
Point of order: are they bottles?  (As in, glass?)  

By accident shortly after re-arriving in China (literally shortly--the driver conveying me from the airport did ply me with this product as we waited for his mysterious and lovely companion to exit the roadside crapper), I discovered a pleasing and quite Chinese soft drink: Bing Hong Cha.  There are two companies that sell an almost identical product, but one of them, either Wahaha or the other company, packages their beverage like so:

(http://changchun.96128.com/images/200810/1224789257445769623.jpg)

Black Ice Tea.  Relax yourself!  

Take two in the... morning.


Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 12, 2010, 06:54:06 AM
Mr. Zhang likes to start his morning with a 6 pack.  Neighbors refused to discuss where the other 4 drinks went. aqaqaqaqaq

Black Ice Tea.  Relax yourself! 

Take two in the... morning.


Sadly, his English teacher neglected to define oral vs anal when following dosage instructions. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on October 12, 2010, 07:29:23 AM
Mr Zhang also owns a tiny bicycle made from thumb tacks and fencing wire, but believes one day his shock absorbing squat'n'relax kit will revolutionize the way we think of curbside lunch breaks.  Currently the kit is being sold to late night club goers, and has settled--uneasily--into the too drunk to stand, to sober to fall niche market.  Accidents related to improper use of his product are, in that crowd, laughed off by bystanders and often technically forgotten by the users themselves the next day.  Zhang, seen here demonstrating his product to a skeptical lunch time crowd, hopes to expand his...

business.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on October 12, 2010, 08:50:48 AM

The quality of my tea is not strain'd,
It droppeth as the gentle rain from heaven
Into the place beneath. It is twice blest:
It blesseth him that seats and him that sates
His thirst upon the drinking.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on October 12, 2010, 10:13:09 AM
No bottle opener?

No problem.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: NATO on October 12, 2010, 01:57:10 PM
It wasn't until Mr Liu had shoved 8 of 10 bottles up his arse that he realised coming to kindergarten smashed out of his face with the intention of singing "10 green Bottles" was quite possibly the worst idea he had ever had.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on October 12, 2010, 02:19:24 PM
Calach, yes...those are glass beer bottles. At least they're presented as such...

Latefordinner, thanks...and I agree on this one. agagagagag
I'm constantly searching the image engines for photos I think are weird enough to grace our cover. I'm sorry, but I can never remember where particular pics came from... bibibibibi

And...some funny responses woven through the other stuff. bjbjbjbjbj bfbfbfbfbf ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: NATO on October 12, 2010, 03:02:24 PM
Uh, yeah sorry. I can't get a bit absurd when I'm feeling deprived of sleep  aqaqaqaqaq
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 15, 2010, 08:26:20 AM
To truly preserve the quality of great beer, it should be kept out of direct sunlight.  Some beer lovers stick it in the fridge.  Others are more . . . innovative.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on October 15, 2010, 11:19:06 AM
Bottle #1 to do #1 and bottle #2 to do ... oh shit, no shit, still #1
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 17, 2010, 03:14:16 AM
100 bottles of beer up his ass
100 bottles of beer
If one of those bottles should happen to pass
99 bottles of beer up his ass
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on October 17, 2010, 05:38:09 AM
One big man of beer on the bottles,
one big man of beer
if one big man of beer should happen to fall,
there'll be no big mans of beer on the bottles.


 jjjjjjjjjj
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on October 19, 2010, 02:14:41 PM
Here's de new one. Gots high hopes fer it. uuuuuuuuuu

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/squatseat.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on October 19, 2010, 02:28:28 PM
Damn, I'm glad this isn't a rocking chair
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on October 19, 2010, 11:29:59 PM
High-wire walkers are perpetually in practice.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 20, 2010, 05:01:24 AM
Incidents of misbehavior are way down since Teacher Zhong adopted his new discipline methods.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on October 20, 2010, 10:36:14 AM
Hey, you four gay boys, ...              aoaoaoaoao aoaoaoaoao aoaoaoaoao aoaoaoaoao
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Ruth on October 20, 2010, 11:13:06 AM
Xiao Ping refused to listen when the teacher said, "Keep 6 feet on the floor" and is now suffering the consequences.  "You want to try balancing on your chair? Try this." said Teacher Zhou, who hovers nearby with a switch to ensure compliance.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: old34 on October 20, 2010, 12:11:47 PM
Marxism class at the China Academy of Acrobatics.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on October 20, 2010, 01:59:26 PM
Shaw Ping received an A+ in physics demonstrating a fulcrum
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: seamallowance on October 20, 2010, 11:18:12 PM
This is what results when Tech Writers get lazy.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on October 21, 2010, 06:19:20 AM
Should have trusted Preparation H(TM)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on October 25, 2010, 10:28:08 AM
R&D lab for Kohler's new bathroom fixtures was not all that it was cracked up to be.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on October 25, 2010, 06:20:53 PM
Lest we fergit...
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/kfg.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on October 26, 2010, 01:00:30 AM
You mean "RAT" doesn't start with a "G"?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on October 26, 2010, 03:23:33 AM
Kentucky Fried Guess (what's inside)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on October 26, 2010, 03:27:17 AM
Oh, the Colonel will have this guy's balls.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 26, 2010, 04:22:51 AM
Kentucky Fried Genetically-altered-chicken-like-creatures

Kentucky Fried Gizzards

Kentucky Fried Ghicken - Hey, it's close enough.  We only got paid 25 RMB to paint the damned sign.


It doesn't matter what it stands for.  The Colonel orders you to buy and eat his products, NOW! hhhhhhhhhh
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on October 26, 2010, 04:32:14 AM
That's no Colonel.  That's Bill Oddie.

Kentucky Fried Goodie.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 26, 2010, 04:38:39 AM
In a new cross-marketing attempt, KFC and the Disney Corporation roll out their new dog meat restaurant - Kentucky Fried Goofy
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: MK on October 26, 2010, 04:51:28 AM
Saw this on Chinasmack - The Chinese name is "ken ta ji", i.e. "knibble his chicken" which is pretty funny.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on October 26, 2010, 06:07:48 AM
Why does "The Colonel" look more like Charlie Chan?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on October 26, 2010, 06:31:54 AM
I think he looks more like someone told him what's inside
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on October 26, 2010, 07:17:23 AM
HEY! Stop f#cken reading and order food, this isn't a library. You want to spel goodly, go to skule
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: NATO on October 26, 2010, 02:48:22 PM
"Kewl freedom, guyz"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 27, 2010, 02:51:38 AM
In order to deal with the problem of an excessive number of expats, China just opened it's first Kentucky Fried Gweilo. ahahahahah

Mexico is now considering a similar move with a new chain called Kentucky Fried Gringos.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on October 27, 2010, 11:47:28 PM
Kitchen-prepared F***n G**g.
or
Kommunist Fried Grubs
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on October 30, 2010, 09:40:16 PM
This week's entry. Go nuts. bfbfbfbfbf

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/fambike.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Borkya on October 31, 2010, 01:00:44 AM
Hey Raoul, where did you get this pic? I'm feeling like it is a fake. I mean the baby in the bucket looks really photoshopped! (And no one appears to be holding the bucket.)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Ruth on October 31, 2010, 03:33:17 AM
Yeah, the baby in the bucket is definitely an addition.  The rest I can believe.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on October 31, 2010, 06:20:07 AM
"This must be the Nutcracker Suite I heard them talking about" aoaoaoaoao
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on October 31, 2010, 11:02:50 AM
Well, the photo was sent to me by Riz, as stated. Don't know the provenance beyond that... mmmmmmmmmm

I wouldn't be too sure the bucket-baby is Photoshopped, either. But I don't know.
And I don't care. It's a great photo at face value. bjbjbjbjbj
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on October 31, 2010, 11:46:49 AM
Baby: Larry, c'mon, we have room.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 01, 2010, 12:34:30 AM
Despite family planning guidelines, some Chinese families still have babies by the bucketful.

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on November 01, 2010, 01:26:56 AM
Make room in there, guy. We still have to pick up Grandma and the twins.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on November 01, 2010, 01:41:20 AM
You should see how many we can fit into a clown car.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Ruth on November 01, 2010, 02:57:07 AM
Baby Xiao Wu could hardly wait for his older brother, Xiao Si, to grow a little so he could have some hand-me-down clothes.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on November 01, 2010, 04:22:11 AM
For your safety, and remember safety comes first, keep all heads, hands and feet somewhere near the motorcycle (or in the bucket)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: xwarrior on November 01, 2010, 04:49:38 AM
There's a hole in your bucket, dear Liza ....
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on November 01, 2010, 04:49:48 AM
http://message.snopes.com/showthread.php?t=63109

Because, like, if there wasn't a baby, we'd have to argue over just how the mototrcycle was overcrowded.

"No, I'm telling you, three adults maximum with three handlebar gnomes!"


Baby sez, call me Reuben.

Hello World, here's a song that we're singin'!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Ruth on November 01, 2010, 02:01:30 PM
Families in the area are being warned to keep tight hold on their children - especially those being carried in buckets - as the notorious motorcycle gang strikes again.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on November 01, 2010, 03:12:50 PM
The Wang family returns from Wal-Mart during the 7-for-1 special.  Deposit withheld until buckets returned.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on November 01, 2010, 03:15:45 PM
The Gui Yang Hillbillies head for Guongdong after striking it rich in the organ donation business.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on November 01, 2010, 04:01:27 PM
1,  2,  3, ...  8,  9 WAIT, stop the bike!

We forgot the twins, LiLi and Pedro
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 02, 2010, 03:22:42 AM
Officer Xiao of the Guangzhou PSB presented evidence that new regulations to reduce the number of vehicles on the streets during the Asia Games have been even more successful than anticipated.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on November 02, 2010, 07:44:37 AM
You can't see the two buckets and Anhui suitcase on the right side: clothes, oranges and the family duck, Honghong.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 02, 2010, 10:03:16 AM
New High Occupancy Vehicle lanes are restricted to vehicles carrying at least 6 passengers.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: fox on November 02, 2010, 02:13:35 PM
There's a hole in your bucket, dear Liza ....

i see number six from the front has lost her/his head. Of course it may be in the bucket.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: fox on November 02, 2010, 03:47:35 PM
very good ben-dan.  do you think the picture was taken through a bus window? it seems that way to me. and if so then the light could be a bit higgledy piggledy as it gets reflected off various bits of bus.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on November 02, 2010, 03:56:40 PM
It does look like it was shot out of a bus window. The shadow in front of the wheel looks to be a side view mirror but there is still definitely something wrong with Chucky.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Ruth on November 03, 2010, 01:22:56 AM
Put some clothes on the kid while you're at it.  One doesn't have to be a photoshop sleuth to figure out that the bucket baby doesn't fit with the rest of the picture. 
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Pashley on November 03, 2010, 02:22:42 AM
Dammit, Fei Fei, you forgot the dog!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on November 03, 2010, 02:29:33 AM
No one has mentioned the bike. What a great ad opportunity

Comfort for two, strong enough for 12

Who says you need a car for a family outing

Imagine if we added a third wheel?

And this model is the X series, the LX has more room and power
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Pashley on November 03, 2010, 02:49:24 AM
No one has mentioned the bike. What a great ad opportunity

This 125-T touring bike has better carrying capacity.
However, if your family is small, get the sports model 125-S for higher performance.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 03, 2010, 05:31:48 AM
It's things like this that make me sad that Dongguan has mostly outlawed motorcycles.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Slim Pickens on November 03, 2010, 05:07:57 PM
7 people on a bike is still pretty outrageous, even if they didn't pick up a bucket of Kentucky Fried Child.

I don't quite understand the mindset of someone who saw the original photograph and thought, 'This picture doesn't look dangerous enough.  Margaret, switch on my laptop!'
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on November 04, 2010, 01:05:43 AM
Haven't you ever seen a picture of a great motorcycle then saw training wheels attached?

Or a million dollar car with an 8-track player.

Photo-shopping a bucket of baby bubba is priceless. Of course no one is going to put their naked kid out like that (though you never know here). I'd add a bumper sticker that says "Baby on board - except we're not sure where he is"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: xwarrior on November 04, 2010, 04:06:00 AM
if you are not sure whether the photo has been PHOTOSHOPPEDthen take a look at the photo attached.

Still not convinced?? Then you can go back to my post on p1 - and check out the photo I attached to 'there's a hole ......"


Still not convinced? ? ?  bibibibibi

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 04, 2010, 05:50:38 AM
if you are not sure whether the photo has been PHOTOSHOPPEDthen take a look at the photo attached.

Still not convinced?? Then you can go back to my post on p1 - and check out the photo I attached to 'there's a hole ......"

Still not convinced? ? ?  bibibibibi

Hey Xwarrior, it looks like someone photoshopped the bucket baby out of your copy for some reason. ahahahahah

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: xwarrior on November 04, 2010, 10:03:24 AM
Quote
Hey Xwarrior, it looks like someone photoshopped the bucket baby out of your copy for some reason. th_ah

You know, I was sitting on the bus this afternoon when the same thought occurred to me.  bibibibibi

My first reaction was to get off the bus, get a taxi home, get on the internet and apologise to everybody in the Saloon for my error.

Then I thought, no ... bugger them ... and enjoyed an afternoon in the sun

PS Photoshop is to photos the same as a Chinese public toilet is to the LoovreLouvre       
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on November 04, 2010, 04:40:45 PM
... or as a bucket is to a baby.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Slim Pickens on November 04, 2010, 06:25:00 PM
Haven't you ever seen a picture of a great motorcycle then saw training wheels attached?

Or a million dollar car with an 8-track player.

I haven't seen the examples you mention, but I do understand the humour of them, they have a punchline of sorts.


Photo-shopping a bucket of baby bubba is priceless. Of course no one is going to put their naked kid out like that (though you never know here).

What I can't get my head around is why someone would want to add 'a bucket of baby bubba' to a picture which already is amusing in a, 'Jeez, only in China, eh?' kind of way.  If one needs Photoshop to manipulate photographs taken in China, then one surely is not getting out and about enough.  Or to put it another way, China sometimes is Photoshop without the need for software.

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on November 05, 2010, 12:44:57 AM
True that
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: xwarrior on November 05, 2010, 12:48:25 AM
I was sitting outside a shop in Zhaoqing when this family pulled up to buy fruit.

I am not sure if the mother had fallen off the back - and I do not know if there is a baby in the bag - but it is the most people on a motorbike I have been able to get in a photo - so far!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on November 05, 2010, 11:37:18 AM
You missed the 7 people in the side car, you should have gone over to the other side
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on November 09, 2010, 06:23:06 AM
Aaaaaand here's the next one. Hope it ends the Photoshop debate, anyway... bibibibibi

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/anon_animals.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 09, 2010, 06:31:43 AM
WTF!?!?!

Did someone forget to shear the sheep before flattening them?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on November 09, 2010, 06:44:33 AM
Ni yao la de ma?
(Would you like that spicy?)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on November 09, 2010, 06:52:08 AM
Statler: What’s your opening act? A Chinese gorilla dancing ballet?!
Both: HAHAHA!

Kermit: Er, cancel the opening act.



-The Muppet Show, 1976.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on November 09, 2010, 07:08:41 AM
Darth: "Obi-Wan never told you what happened to your father..."
Luke: "NOOOOOO!"

Kermit: "Remember, a Jedi's strength flows from the Force"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: xwarrior on November 09, 2010, 12:08:51 PM
Quote
Inflatable Pets

New Zealand males are very familiar with sheep as in the photo. They perform the same function as the 'blow up' dolls found in sex shops.

The great advantage of these 'Baaabie Dolls' is that they do not require inflation to become functional.

Kiwis travelling overseas report that they are superior in every respect to live products available in local markets. Their portability (suit-cased size) is seen as a plus.   
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on November 09, 2010, 01:40:52 PM
New service for families who have lost their pets to unfortunate roadkill accidents: turn your beloved family member into jerky.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: NATO on November 09, 2010, 01:52:12 PM
"Y'know Eric, when I said 'let's hang out together' this wasn't really what I had in mind"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on November 09, 2010, 02:13:41 PM
"I got you, babe."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on November 09, 2010, 05:05:31 PM
"We can haz cheezburger?"





(Argh, those things are both cute and heinous, I can't keep away.)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on November 09, 2010, 07:24:40 PM
'Taint no sin to take off your skin, and dance around in your bones.

Meanwhile, screams were heard from the petting zoo.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on November 10, 2010, 12:45:42 AM
"Hey Fred"

"Yea Zeke?"

"You know what?"

"No, what"

"I've got to scratch my balls so badly, it's killing me"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on November 10, 2010, 02:31:56 AM
Genetically-modified arma-pillows for that late-night snack
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 10, 2010, 04:22:12 AM
Mr. Lu was very surprised that the sheep trapeze act didn't bring more business into his meat shop.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on November 10, 2010, 07:40:36 AM
"Gee Fred,I can't seem to remember a thing after that tenth drink!! :alcoholic:
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on November 10, 2010, 11:04:27 AM
"Another fine mess..."





(And LOL at the picture of two flat turtles shopped into a legitimate flying-baby-bucket pic.  Completes the image.)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: psd4fan on November 10, 2010, 01:51:14 PM
This is what happens when sheep jump from very high buildings
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: fox on November 11, 2010, 02:05:32 AM
not one taken by me but worthy of comments im sure... 
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on November 11, 2010, 08:49:41 AM
Aaargh!
Please consider sending such great photos to me for consideration as a weekly Cover Photo (these don't have to be original, and in fact usually are not) rather than posting them! llllllllll
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: fox on November 11, 2010, 01:09:59 PM
Aaargh!
Please consider sending such great photos to me for consideration as a weekly Cover Photo (these don't have to be original, and in fact usually are not) rather than posting them! llllllllll


ooops.  im sure ive read this before..   ok. sorry.   
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on November 15, 2010, 09:10:08 AM
On the road or in the bush, The Instant SheepTM ("Just Add Hot Water!TM") has been such a comfort to millions of Australians.

< Oh, crap...XWarrior had long since beaten me to this one... bibibibibi >
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on November 15, 2010, 09:18:40 AM
'K...Read 'em and weep...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/walmartchina.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: kitano on November 15, 2010, 10:14:21 AM
this one always makes me laugh cos it reminds me of how korea imported fast food then when i lived there they were importing the diet industry :D

thanks america!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on November 15, 2010, 10:22:13 AM
Waldo!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on November 15, 2010, 10:30:57 AM
Come to beautiful Chengdu. We have giant pandas.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on November 15, 2010, 11:18:50 AM
There's something arch afoot:
http://www.chinasmack.com/2010/pictures/chengdu-girl-with-daring-fashion-sense-real-life-version-xiao-yue-yue.html
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on November 15, 2010, 12:21:23 PM
Nuts, Calach beat me to it!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on November 15, 2010, 12:50:19 PM
Yeah.
What struck me here was not her weight, but the sheer tackiness of her attire. This could have easily come right out of the "People Of Wal-Mart" website... aaaaaaaaaa
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: old34 on November 15, 2010, 01:51:57 PM
Whatever happened to that idea of modifying the Saloon so that the avatar only appears on one page?

Once again, though it's fun for many, some of us access the Saloon in public places in China where people all around us are, like, "look at what the laowai is looking at."

I've mentioned it before a couple of times. It's really annoying. Keep it on the front page, but lose it from the "Unread posts page" which is where I usually land when I visit the Saloon.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on November 15, 2010, 02:12:01 PM
Was thinking the same thing, RD. Can Jerry Springer be far behind?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 15, 2010, 11:29:15 PM
If only her midsection were as small as her skirt.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on November 16, 2010, 12:26:52 AM
I'll take the super-sized roll with that O.J.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on November 16, 2010, 12:27:46 AM
That is not where you wear an armband   asasasasas
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on November 16, 2010, 06:20:33 PM
bkbkbkbkbk bkbkbkbkbk
I have a feeling that Bucket-Baby is going to haunt us for a long time.... ahahahahah

Meanwhile...for limiting the "cover" pic to the front page...
Brethren and Cistern, I feel your pain. And no, we haven't forgotten.
This is a very technical issue, and as such the bailiwick of our dear friend Nolefan. (One time I spilt my drink in one of them machines and big scary sparks came flyin' out, and I'm never goin' near 'em again! kkkkkkkkkk )
And guys, Br'er 'Noles is a very, very busy man. He has a Real Job (more than one, actually) and works long days trying to scratch a living out of the stony, inhospitable soil that is Beijing. And when he's not working, I strongly suspect he's either spending some time indulging in Dirty Little Monkey activities or is pasted to the sofa in a tequila coma religious trance.

I too have tech modifications I've wanted for a very long time...including a revamp of the cover picture. But the reality is that we have to work with Nolefan's very limited schedule. That's just how it is. Please never forget that it is only through the loving generosity of this lovely man that the Saloon continues to exist at all.  He deserves patience.

And the cover pic goes back to the very first days of this site. It's as much a part of the Saloon as Uncle Bertie (for you newcomers, that's the guy in the upper-left corner of the page), school horror stories, near-fatal hangovers, or chlamydia. I am sorry for the inconvenience it causes some of you, but as such, I'm not willing to eliminate it to accommodate a relatively small minority of members. (And no, my jealousy over not being able to afford a smart phone, especially in the USA where mobile-phone users are being bent over and screwed by the service providers to an unconscionable extent, has nothing to do with this...)
PLEASE be patient. We'll do what we can. bjbjbjbjbj

In the meantime, I at least hope you've noticed my own attempts to meet you half-way. I been changin' the pitcher real reg'ler-like, and I'm trying to limit the size of the photos to as small as possible... bjbjbjbjbj
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on November 17, 2010, 12:42:16 AM
I think I've been back in the US too long...What's the problem with the photo?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 17, 2010, 01:55:28 AM
I think I've been back in the US too long...What's the problem with the photo?

Spot on!  Since I'm back on Earth for a visit now, she looks slightly overweight, but more than acceptable.  Back on Planet China, she's the poster girl for obesity.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on November 17, 2010, 03:33:02 AM
"Will you still need me,will you still feed me when I'm sixty four?"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on November 17, 2010, 04:10:03 AM
"Will you still need me,will you still feed me when I'm sixty four?"

She must discern between kilos and years
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on November 17, 2010, 05:51:45 AM
I think I've been back in the US too long...What's the problem with the photo?

Spot on!  Since I'm back on Earth for a visit now, she looks slightly overweight, but more than acceptable.  Back on Planet China, she's the poster girl for obesity.


It's not her weight. There are plenty of Chinese woman bigger than her. It's her choice of clothing.

Although that may be normal attire for an American girl these days. I don't know, I don't like to visit the States.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on November 17, 2010, 12:59:22 PM
It's not her weight. There are plenty of Chinese woman bigger than her. It's her choice of clothing.

Although that may be normal attire for an American girl these days. I don't know, I don't like to visit the States.

I was commenting on both. I've seen some horrible fashions since returning home. I'm just glad my wife hasn't adopted such styles.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 17, 2010, 04:17:59 PM
to put it bluntly, it's the discontinuity between the outfit and the belly. See, the outfit is supposed to be sexy but instead accentuated the grosser elements of the physique in question. She'd look hotter in overalls. It's the irony. Something along those lines.

Yeah, but she'd still be considered borderline sexy in the USA (and downright slender in Tennessee - if you want to feel thin, visit there).  Personally, I enjoy tacky clothing like that on a girl, but only if she's built for it.  In China, she's definitely not built for it.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on November 20, 2010, 11:51:48 AM
I don't like to visit the States.

Between the notorious rudeness and bullying of their customs officials, and that new nudey machine they installed at airports, I can't say that I'm too keen on touring America either.  Shame, I really like the people.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on November 20, 2010, 12:05:03 PM
I don't like to visit the States.

Between the notorious rudeness and bullying of their customs officials, and that new nudey machine they installed at airports, I can't say that I'm too keen on touring America either.  Shame, I really like the people.

Try it when you look like you could be Middle Eastern. It's frightening. A fine place with wonderful people but it's not worth crossing the border any more.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 21, 2010, 04:24:38 PM
Gaaaaahhhh... the longer I'm out of China, the better that girl looks.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on November 21, 2010, 05:18:16 PM
I don't like to visit the States.

But...but...that 'Double Down' sandwichoid at KFC is mighty fine, and McDonald's just brought back the McRib!!! axaxaxaxax

No, seriously though... Fine. Stay up there in your frozen tundra, sliding your various-sized lumps around on the ice and getting down-and-funky to your Celine Dion and Bryan Adams albums. It's not like we really want any more of you Frostbacks running around down here, staring luridly at our women and being all polite and decent and self-effacing, anyway. asasasasas

I mean, sure, our Border Nazis Customs Agents are rude to YOU. Who wouldn't be? And naturally  we irradiate you as you slip across our borders. We're just trying to keep your numbers down, and this seems more humane than simply shooting you. Besides, how do we know one of your extremist fanatics of the Great Prophet Tim Horton (May Peace and Blessings Be Unto Him) isn't concealing a payload of Poutine in his underwear, ready to blow himself and his surroundings up at any time? oooooooooo

Why, they tell me that Southern California is just CRAWLING  with youse Maple Niggers these days. aoaoaoaoao
Can't imagine why. dddddddddd

Frankly, I am appalled and embarrassed to have to admit that such an enormous proportion of my closest and dearest friends come from such an awful place. :wtf:

P.S.: I do make one sole exception for Joni Mitchell, whose children I still hope to bear one day. akakakakak



P.P.S.: blblblblbl :grouphug: bmbmbmbmbm
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: piglet on November 21, 2010, 05:48:01 PM
ah there now you have shattered ALL my illusions about the Middle Kingdom. I was led to believe that all the maidens are very very nubile, and that anything over 38 is XXXL
anyway I think it's wonderful that she is so comfortable in her body to wear whatever she likes -NOT
 kkkkkkkkkk kkkkkkkkkk
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on November 21, 2010, 06:21:29 PM
Enough mutterings about minced moosemeat. Just for Piglet:
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/chinabrides.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on November 21, 2010, 10:47:26 PM
What's that Led Zeppelin song? Oh yea, "Whole Lotta Love"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Borkya on November 21, 2010, 11:17:13 PM
Okay, I'm gonna go all "feminist" on this one. Are we going to make fun of a few beautiful, yet playful fat girls? Really? i mean, i get the last pic, it was about the horrible fashion sense of the girl, not the fact that she was fat necessarily (in a normal shirt she would look quite normal) but this picture is cute, and nice and you are only picking on them because they are fat, which I think is a bit too much. 
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on November 21, 2010, 11:26:12 PM
Okay, I'm gonna go all "feminist" on this one. Are we going to make fun of a few beautiful, yet playful fat girls? Really? i mean, i get the last pic, it was about the horrible fashion sense of the girl, not the fact that she was fat necessarily (in a normal shirt she would look quite normal) but this picture is cute, and nice and you are only picking on them because they are fat, which I think is a bit too much. 

I agree.


Can you imagine how big they were before their wedding dress diet?

Holy Hindenburg Batman!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: zero on November 22, 2010, 02:15:00 AM
I would do them all.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 22, 2010, 03:14:24 AM
Fat bottomed girls, you make my rocking world go round!

(I have GOT to get out of here.  aqaqaqaqaq  4 days to go.)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on November 22, 2010, 03:16:37 AM
If you think we're big, you should see our husbands
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on November 22, 2010, 05:37:53 AM

If you think we're big, you should see our husbands


Look closer, they're standing on their shoulders in the pic.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on November 22, 2010, 06:41:40 AM
Uh, Borky...

I'm decidedly a Family Economy Size meself. I really wouldn't stoop to what you're accusing me of. kkkkkkkkkk

Generally, the only people I pick on and make fun of are Foreigners (ie non-Americans). ahahahahah pppppppppp

That picture, rather playfully I hope, DOES illustrate the costs and impacts of the changes undergone by a newly world-interactive China. This photo would have been impossible to take in China 20 or 30 years ago.

And it IS a cute photo. aeaeaeaeae

I'm obviously somewhat pickier than some of our other male members...OK, MOST of our other male members, especially EL, who had to leave China after being arrested several times  for running through the streets of town naked from the waist down chasing after stray farm animals... but hey, I'd do some of those girls, too. afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: seamallowance on November 22, 2010, 06:54:16 AM
"The Octuplet's big day"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on November 22, 2010, 06:55:33 AM
Oh...and I really don't think those raised fists are wanking motions.

I suspect they're samples of what their husbands can expect if they don't hand over those damn paychecks snappy-like. aoaoaoaoao



Actually, I suspect this photo is probably staged and those are not brides at all. kkkkkkkkkk
Think about it...even in today's post-Chairman Mao, post-Colonel Sanders China, what are the odds of finding all those women getting married at about the same time?

That said, none of the heavier ladies I observed in China ever seemed to be having any problems with their love lives. I definitely don't question the weddings, just the timing. bjbjbjbjbj
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: old34 on November 22, 2010, 09:29:48 AM

Think about it...even in today's post-Chairman Mao, post-Colonel Sanders China, what are the odds of finding all those women getting married at about the same time?

Many cities now have these large (no pun intended) group weddings these days ala the Reverend Sun Moon, without the religious aspect.
Dahongyin (Big Red Eagle) CIgarette Company promotes them from time to time when hundreds of couples will get married on the same day at the same place for advertising purposes. Post-modern Mao indeed!

EDIT: For example, here:
http://is.gd/hzVuv (http://is.gd/hzVuv)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on November 22, 2010, 10:07:24 AM
They are all wearing white.

No surprise there.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on November 22, 2010, 11:42:47 AM
Oh, quiet, ya Dancing White Monkey ya. cbcbcbcbcb

Lao San, I know about the group wedding thing. Ya knows yer stuff. bjbjbjbjbj
I'm just not so sure about that particular group, all at the same time. I certainly wouldn't say it's impossible, but even with such a large populace it seems to me that the odds are awfully long. Obesity is certainly a lot more common than it used to be in China, but it's still far from a large proportion of the populace...especially among adults.

But hey, once every few years I might be wrong. ababababab
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on November 22, 2010, 01:52:44 PM
Wait until you find out they all married the same guy
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on November 22, 2010, 02:04:54 PM
DD: They all married the same foreign teacher? (OOOps, cross-post)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on November 22, 2010, 02:26:15 PM
Japalese Fisto Pumpo!

Better than bran.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: The Local Dialect on November 22, 2010, 02:45:42 PM
I'm not positive, but I think the heavier girls on the bottom are part of a singing group that is all about embracing their size and loving who they are even if they're not stick thin.

Off to baidu for further investigation ...


So they're not the group I was thinking of (千斤组合 if anyone is curious) but I found this article,

http://www.hangzhou.com.cn/20090413/ca1700275.htm

which is about these brides. Apparently 9 new brides of over 150 jin (so 75kg and above) decided to get married on the same day and made an event out of it. One of the brides organized the event and over 200 overweight brides applied to be a part of it and she chose 8 of them. It seems they were basically trying to show China that you don't have to be think to find love and be happy. So it is real afterall.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on November 22, 2010, 02:56:23 PM
I'd like to be the shop owner who sold all the material for those dresses

cha-ching in China
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on November 22, 2010, 03:23:56 PM
Nikon's new Wide Distortion Lens TM, with aggressive crossmarketing, hope to tap a new niche market.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 22, 2010, 03:40:05 PM
Help me! aqaqaqaqaq  Three days left before I get on the plane to fly home to China and those chunky Chinese girls are getting hotter and hotter moment by moment.

In China, I'd have thought aaaaaaaaaa , but now I'm thinking akakakakak bhbhbhbhbh akakakakak bhbhbhbhbh

So this is what it's like for a drug addict who can't get a fix. llllllllll ananananan aoaoaoaoao
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on November 22, 2010, 03:44:47 PM
Welcome back to the candy store, EL
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on November 22, 2010, 04:31:32 PM
Well, ya saw what I was saying earlier about EL's arrest record, right? bibibibibi


Japalese Fisto Pumpo!
Better than bran.

CP: You a SICK white muthaf**ka, ain't ya? aqaqaqaqaq


TLD, kudos on the detective work. So they DID all get married at the same time! Wouldja, wouldja, woo... ararararar
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on November 22, 2010, 04:41:24 PM
. . . to show China that you don't have to be think to find love and be happy.

You don't have to think to find love and be happy?   mmmmmmmmmm

You got that right buster  uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: The Local Dialect on November 22, 2010, 11:07:48 PM
Haha freudian slip on my part? I meant "thin" of course. Oops!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: fox on November 23, 2010, 12:08:06 AM
Nikon's new Wide Distortion Lens TM, with aggressive crossmarketing, hope to tap a new niche market.

 bkbkbkbkbk
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on November 23, 2010, 01:22:21 AM
Weddings in China are a growth industry. 
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: BrandeX on November 23, 2010, 03:39:08 AM
Parental arranged marriages for the win! "Hoohah!"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on November 23, 2010, 05:16:33 AM
Team Bukakkae Revenge says: "testikle?! YAAAAARGGGH"


Empowering women since before you might not have been born.  YAAAAARGGGH!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on November 23, 2010, 05:29:01 AM
Team Bukakkae revenge says, never try to catch two frogs with one hand.  Instead, the man who moves the mountain does so by first carrying away two stones.  So squeeze them together. 

YAAAAAA!  FROG PUNCHO!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on November 23, 2010, 05:30:36 AM
(The thing about claiming it to be Japanese weird sexo is there's totally no need whatsoever to explain the wedding dresses.)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on November 23, 2010, 05:59:11 AM
(The thing about claiming it to be Japanese weird sexo is there's totally no need whatsoever to explain the wedding dresses.)

True, but why isn't there a a schoolgirl on a dwarf's shoulders holding a pair of octopi?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on November 23, 2010, 07:51:11 AM
^ a question for the ages.  Where is the dwarf?


YAAAARGH!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on November 23, 2010, 01:30:23 PM
Chinese netizens outraged by dwarf-crushing video
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on November 23, 2010, 02:33:55 PM
^ and vow revenge.

YAAAARGH, cry the netizens, all eight of them.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: piglet on November 23, 2010, 05:29:43 PM
isn't this insulting to dwarfs? Or is that okay on this board? :wtf:
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on November 23, 2010, 07:05:21 PM
Well, none of those women are sitting down, so...
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 25, 2010, 12:51:22 AM
Sir Mixalot's China fantasy finally comes true. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on December 01, 2010, 03:33:58 PM
The latest. Hope it puts some of the misunderstandings, not to mention the symptoms of latent perversions, back to rest. bibibibibi

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/beware.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on December 01, 2010, 03:40:21 PM
What do you mean "Beware of People"? How the hell do you think the baby got here in the first place?   mmmmmmmmmm (I mean like just over 9 months ago, not 9 minutes ago)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: piglet on December 01, 2010, 03:54:12 PM
thanks for that Raoul. A nice bit of Chinglish always makes my day.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Slim Pickens on December 01, 2010, 05:26:30 PM
The latest.
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/beware.jpg)

The creator of the sign must have studied at the Jean-Paul Sartre School of English where the classrooms have no exits.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: piglet on December 02, 2010, 04:20:52 AM
Now you sent me right back to my college lectures, Slim
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on December 02, 2010, 06:13:34 AM
This one is its own caption. Nothing more need be said.

But RD, you should know by now that
Quote
the symptoms of latent perversions
will never be laid to rest. The symptoms that are out of the closet will see to that.
Now where is that sailor-suited girl with the flattened dwarf?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on December 02, 2010, 09:13:43 AM
DAMNIT TO HELL!!!!  Another stupid mistranslation by these pathetic earthlings. bibibibibi

It's supposed to say:
BEWARE OF HUMANS
 xxxxxxxxxx
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on December 03, 2010, 12:24:31 AM
That is one of the wisest pieces of advice I've ever heard.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on December 07, 2010, 11:36:39 AM
Aw, Jeez, I almost hate to think what youse weirdos and preverts gonna make of this one... aoaoaoaoao

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/humanpig.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on December 07, 2010, 01:53:42 PM
In response to The Simpsons Movie, China attempts to create Spider-pig. A mix up in the lab resulted in Bat-pig. Witnesses described the creation as tasty.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: piglet on December 07, 2010, 04:20:26 PM
I think that a conflict of interests prevents me from participating in this week's one so I will sit it out  bhbhbhbhbh
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on December 08, 2010, 03:19:14 AM
Now that genetic splicing kits are readily available, science fair projects are a lot more interesting.


(My personal reaction =  aaaaaaaaaa aoaoaoaoao aaaaaaaaaa aoaoaoaoao aaaaaaaaaa aoaoaoaoao)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on December 08, 2010, 03:44:18 AM
Our foundation is not that desperate for foreign teachers. yet
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on December 08, 2010, 03:47:36 AM
So the taboids weren't lying. Fern Arable really did have a passionate fling with Wilbur and had his love child.

I wonder what Charlotte's descendants wrote about that in their webs. mmmmmmmmmm
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on December 08, 2010, 05:55:24 AM
Some pets are so ugly that they're cute.  This aint one of them.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on December 08, 2010, 11:29:26 AM
Give face.  Get face.  Lose face.  Pig finds face.  Pig steals face.  Pig has face.

Handsome.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on December 08, 2010, 01:03:50 PM
"Here, at a special farm in Anhui Province, we get a glimpse of how future Private-School Owners are produced." bpbpbpbpbp
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on December 09, 2010, 06:49:48 AM
Looks like one of those winged monkeys from "The Wizard of Oz" in its larva stage.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on December 09, 2010, 07:52:48 AM
What was that last line in Animal Farm again?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on December 11, 2010, 01:55:39 PM
Well, I know the ManPig will be missed, but here's the new one already!

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/hanging_dummy.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: piglet on December 11, 2010, 03:57:58 PM
Please tell me what the Chinese says,RD
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on December 11, 2010, 04:03:04 PM
The only part I can see says - advertisement.

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: becster79 on December 11, 2010, 11:03:06 PM
Hey Raoul,

Any chance this could be taken off or at least shortened this week? It looks far too real and if you've had students actually take their own lives (like I have) I find this a tad upsetting to see on here. I can't believe they would use a real person for this, China's hit a new low!

Thanks.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: James the Brit on December 11, 2010, 11:06:28 PM
I think it's a dummy.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on December 11, 2010, 11:55:31 PM
It's a dummy.
Or it was. I give up. llllllllll
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on December 12, 2010, 12:10:02 AM
OK, here we go. Unless this one is somehow offensive too.

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/fine.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on December 12, 2010, 02:08:05 AM
And I'm sorry, Becs. Actually not trying to single you out.
Probably just the depression talking. eeeeeeeeee
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: piglet on December 12, 2010, 04:21:22 AM
What about if I find the new one offensive,RD ? afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: becster79 on December 12, 2010, 09:16:02 AM
Thanks Raoul :)....though all those Chinese smiles can be depressing too! Wonder what's going on behind them?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on December 12, 2010, 09:33:17 AM
Dunno. I like to think they're all fresh from some really degenerate Swingers' Party. uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on December 12, 2010, 11:55:53 AM
Remember last week's pig mutation program competition? Here are the scientists who won first prize
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on December 12, 2010, 11:57:12 AM
Anyone notice how the lady in blue is pick-pocketng the lady in red?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: The Local Dialect on December 12, 2010, 02:17:03 PM
Random picture info -- That big truck in the back was one of the floats from China's 60th birthday parade (I saw it in person and it was HUGE). This must be shortly after the parade itself finished because the floats later ended up in T-square, which isn't where this picture was taken, obviously. bfbfbfbfbf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on December 12, 2010, 02:48:36 PM
the floats later ended up in T-square, which isn't where this picture was taken, obviously.

Hard to say...is that statue in the background the actual Monument to the People's Heroes, just inside one end of the Square, or is it a (pretty impressive) replica, built on a truck-bed as a float? mmmmmmmmmm
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: The Local Dialect on December 12, 2010, 03:27:33 PM
It is a replica, sitting on the bed of the truck (actually I'm not even sure if it is an exact replica or just a similar looking scene with young revolutionaries and all that, but what you see in the picture is definitely on the truck-bed and not behind the truck). It definitely was really impressive, and one of my favorites of all the floats we saw.

That's for sure not T-Square anyhow though, there's no asphalt in the square!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on December 13, 2010, 02:14:50 AM
"Degenerate perverts celebrate that they've all personally successfully cross-bred with pigs and that the reporter who tried to expose them has been hung in front of a billboard."

Damn Raoul, just how offensive can this get?  mmmmmmmmmm
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: fox on December 21, 2010, 06:55:35 AM
i recall seeing this one from last year. cmon guys. get snapping/hunting.  i look for the sites avatar to spark off a new day for me .... how sad is that!!  bibibibibi 
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on December 21, 2010, 07:17:59 AM
Well, this particular picture is a) drop-dead gorgeous and b) a long-standing tradition here.

There are times when tradition is a good thing, and the Christmas season is arguably one of those times. agagagagag

There are also times when traditions must come to an end, and the cover photo, a feature here since day one over 7 years ago, is probably ending after the New Year. It's a lot of hard work that yields me nothing but bitching and whining, so to Hell with it. asasasasas
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on December 21, 2010, 09:18:43 AM

It's a beautiful pic for sure but I always preferred that the more traditional Foreign teacher as Santa pic you used to use. Btw Raoul, did you keep the hat?  aaaaaaaaaa

(http://i888.photobucket.com/albums/ac89/ChangshaNotes/Micellaneous/DrunkSanta.jpg)



There are also times when traditions must come to an end, and the cover photo, a feature here since day one over 7 years ago, is probably ending after the New Year. It's a lot of hard work that yields me nothing but bitching and whining, so to Hell with it. asasasasas


7 years is a long time especially for the tech side of accessing the Saloon. It's way more mobile now and that means we always have to pay attention to people looking over our shoulder. I would love the front page avatar to stay but not on every page, so I can open the 'Unread since your last visit' page without worrying about who is looking.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: fox on December 21, 2010, 09:23:32 AM
hahahaha.  nice one stihl.

for sure the current pic is in keeping with the time of year.  its all good.   :lickass:
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on December 21, 2010, 09:33:18 AM
Actually, I tried that picture only briefly. It drew a lot of bitching and whining and didn't last long at all. llllllllll

And I never worked with a hat, myself. uuuuuuuuuu afafafafaf

Quote
7 years is a long time especially for the tech side of accessing the Saloon. It's way more mobile now and that means we always have to pay attention to people looking over our shoulder. I would love the front page avatar to stay but not on every page, so I can open the 'Unread since your last visit' page without worrying about who is looking.

Yeah yeah yeah, blah blah blah. yyyyyyyyyy
Whatever. I give up. cccccccccc
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on December 21, 2010, 09:39:35 AM
I only ever whined about one. (that pig thing still creeps me out! aaaaaaaaaa)

I think it's a great tradition.  We just need to mix in a few "not quite so disturbing" ones with the "please make it stop!!!" ones.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Paul on December 21, 2010, 02:09:18 PM
"Degenerate perverts celebrate that they've all personally successfully cross-bred with pigs and that the reporter who tried to expose them has been hung in front of a billboard."

Damn Raoul, just how offensive can this get?  mmmmmmmmmm


I just caught this thread by accident, clicking on the wrong link.

I'm shocked. Absolutely shocked! Is this really the kind of saloon I want to be in?

I have a wife and daughter.  I don't want them to know anything about this!  It's all in the past.  How did you find out about me?




Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on December 21, 2010, 10:33:08 PM

Yeah yeah yeah, blah blah blah. yyyyyyyyyy
Whatever. I give up. cccccccccc

I wish you wouldn't ! I, for one, trust your judgment. bfbfbfbfbf You know the old saying about pleasing some of the people some of the time etc. Anyway thanks very much for the enjoyment you have given to many because of the great variety of pictures you have chosen for us. I certainly would not have the patience to do the great job that you do here at the Saloon. agagagagag
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on December 22, 2010, 05:21:17 AM
What GM just said.
When in doubt, consider what you've accomplished with the saloon, and how you've done it. We may be a rowdy, raucous bunch, even obnoxious at times, but we wouldn't be together without you.

BTW, I like EL's suggestion:
Quote
We just need to mix in a few "not quite so disturbing" ones with the "please make it stop!!!" ones.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on December 22, 2010, 07:50:43 AM
"Degenerate perverts celebrate that they've all personally successfully cross-bred with pigs and that the reporter who tried to expose them has been hung in front of a billboard."

Damn Raoul, just how offensive can this get?  mmmmmmmmmm


I just caught this thread by accident, clicking on the wrong link.

I'm shocked. Absolutely shocked! Is this really the kind of saloon I want to be in?

I have a wife and daughter.  I don't want them to know anything about this!  It's all in the past.  How did you find out about me?

Standard procedure for new Saloon member applicants is to run a complete background check through all "degenerates" databases worldwide.  That lets us only let in those seriously disturbed people who will fit in with the crowd here. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on December 24, 2010, 04:03:33 AM
As for the avatar, nobody is  aoaoaoaoao about the kid feeling up mommy's boobies?   mmmmmmmmmm
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on December 24, 2010, 06:59:41 AM
As for the avatar, nobody is  aoaoaoaoao about the kid feeling up mommy's boobies?   mmmmmmmmmm

I'm sending you a bill for my monitor.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on December 25, 2010, 03:29:54 PM
I'm sending you a bill for my monitor.

What did I do?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Ruth on December 27, 2010, 09:14:29 AM
Quote
What did I do?
He probably spat eggnog all over it while laughing at your comment. All your fault for being so funny.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on January 03, 2011, 07:40:55 PM
Yes, after much thought, the Cover Pic is staying. Sorry. Here's why:

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/presscon2.jpg)

For my part, I will try to maintain some small smattering of taste and sensitivity. akakakakak
Otherwise: They're only up for a week. Deal with 'em. cccccccccc

Oh...and thanks to all who sent support for the Cover Photo...and future Cover Photos! bfbfbfbfbf

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on January 03, 2011, 09:39:20 PM
I'm confused.  Is the explanation in your right hand or your left hand?  Ahhhhh, both.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on January 03, 2011, 10:25:06 PM
Look,don't take any notice of the Commandante. If you will just trust me,I know I could fix that "pile" in a few seconds! bfbfbfbfbf

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on January 04, 2011, 12:12:21 AM
Your problem Raoul is that you beat about the bush, speak up man, what do you want to say, what's really on your mind
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on January 04, 2011, 02:33:10 AM
And there was MUCH rejoicing!!! agagagagag agagagagag agagagagag


Your problem Raoul is that you beat about the bush, speak up man, what do you want to say, what's really on your mind

Shhh.... If you keep that up, he might post his "Full Moon" photo. aaaaaaaaaa aoaoaoaoao
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on January 04, 2011, 03:22:48 AM
in the grand tradition of "one picture is worth a thousand words"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on January 04, 2011, 11:53:25 AM
in the grand tradition of "one picture finger is worth a thousand words"

Aren't you glad he didn't raise all 21 digits up (fingers, toes and his nose) he wouldn't stop talking
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Slim Pickens on January 04, 2011, 01:08:37 PM
...the cover photo, a feature here since day one over 7 years ago, is probably ending after the New Year. It's a lot of hard work that yields me nothing but bitching and whining, so to Hell with it.

Quote
Noted Barkeep and Raconteur Raoul F. Duke Explains His Decision To Keep The Cover Photo.

So Raoul is basically giving himself the finger then?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on January 04, 2011, 02:36:40 PM
Not exactly, no. uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Paul on January 07, 2011, 10:27:14 AM
Inexactly?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on January 07, 2011, 01:29:05 PM
Silly rabbit,

Quote
Not exactly no.



means yes
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on January 09, 2011, 03:18:11 PM
Hey Duke, not once have I ever asked you alter the avatar. But the one you have up now is giving me nightmares  uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on January 09, 2011, 08:02:51 PM
bkbkbkbkbk

And for others...never underestimate the might and importance of a comma. uuuuuuuuuu uuuuuuuuuu

Anyway, moving on...here de new one...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/womenkingdom.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: xwarrior on January 10, 2011, 12:48:35 AM
Second question: ,,,,,, shouldn't that sign be everywhere ... and not just outside toilets?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on January 10, 2011, 09:14:24 AM
Damn.  So that's what the sign my fiancee posted on the door of the house means. asasasasas
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on January 10, 2011, 10:36:04 PM
Nice to see a man has a throne in a women's bathroom.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on January 23, 2011, 04:14:30 PM
Yeeeeeee-Haaaawww!
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/backdoor.jpg)

For those of you keeping track, apologies for the extra week on the last photo.
Serious Injury + Great Drugs = Blotto Raoul iiiiiiiiii
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on January 23, 2011, 05:15:12 PM
And now you know why there are no Greeks in China
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: old34 on January 23, 2011, 05:35:07 PM
Yeeeeeee-Haaaawww!
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/backdoor.jpg)

Context? A request, a plea, or a command?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on January 23, 2011, 10:18:11 PM
Context? A request, a plea, or a command?


All of the Above --- until after the appropriate, additional fee has been paid, of course! ababababab
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on January 24, 2011, 02:14:28 AM
Life can be so much more fun if you break a few rules now and then. afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on January 24, 2011, 08:35:19 AM
"Surcharge applies"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on January 24, 2011, 12:20:43 PM
Context? As in, rhe actual real-world raison d'être  of the particular sign in question? mmmmmmmmmm

Absolutely no idea. None whatsoever. kkkkkkkkkk
It's very rare for me to know the real story behind the cover pics...and even more rare for me to try and find out.
This is because, for me, much of the fun of running these pics is to totally make up my own nice twisted "context" for each one of them. Furthermore, much of the rest of fun comes when others among us dream up their own dubiously plausible but charmingly perverted context. uuuuuuuuuu

What's the context? YOU tell ME. agagagagag ahahahahah
Personally, I can see the sign appearing as you go upstairs in the chicken bar (ie from the Showroom to the Production Area), but that's just me. agagagagag
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: gonzo on January 25, 2011, 04:23:10 AM
Ah Raoul, I'm reminded of lawyer Raoul Duke's hand-written note, "backdoor beauty?", he handed to a woman in Fear and Loathing. Earned him a ferocious verbal assault from memory, but I last read it 35 years ago.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on January 25, 2011, 06:02:47 PM
It was actually Raoul Duke's lawyer, Dr. Gonzo, what wrote that note and got the resulting verbal abuse...but otherwise you're spot on. bfbfbfbfbf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on January 27, 2011, 04:03:07 AM
I bet the sign was posted at the front entrance of an establishment with a fire exit that was expertly blocked.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on February 01, 2011, 09:51:58 AM
This week's edition. Confucius Say...(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/confuciussay.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on February 01, 2011, 10:17:45 AM
 llllllllll

can't see it
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on February 02, 2011, 03:18:15 AM
Reminds me of my mother telling me I couldn't swim because it was raining - heaven forbid, I might get wet. bibibibibi
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on February 03, 2011, 03:24:28 AM
Next to that one is a sign that says "Sanlu Milk Company.  2 Km Upriver From Here."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on February 03, 2011, 03:34:19 AM
"Don't sleep in the subway baby, don't fall in the river"

Surefire radio hit in China
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on February 07, 2011, 07:45:14 AM
This Week's Winner...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/hoarding02.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on February 08, 2011, 12:07:14 AM
We here at The Matrix are proud of our record of consuming lives to power all the systems needed.  We do apologize for some of the glitches in the Chinese part of the simulation that may make it seem a little surreal at times.  If anything is too disturbing for you, ask for Agent Smith at any local PSB office and he'll give you a blue pill to make it all better.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on February 14, 2011, 07:59:41 AM
Puddle Time!

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/civilurine.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on February 14, 2011, 09:11:07 PM
Is this the price you have to pay for civilization?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on February 15, 2011, 07:00:06 AM
Those not urinating in a civilized fashion will be forced to breath polluted air.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on February 15, 2011, 07:54:45 AM
...but in here you'd best hold your nose
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Mr Nobody on February 15, 2011, 08:12:14 AM
Maybe the device just out of frame is a coin operated fresh air machine, for those gasping from the stench inside.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on February 15, 2011, 01:11:02 PM
 bbbbbbbbbb And that my friends is why I pee outdoors. I also do it in a civilised way, not just spray everywhere 
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on February 16, 2011, 04:37:25 AM
You are all being very unfair.  Uric acid kills germs, thus airborn urea particles kill airborn germs. 
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on February 16, 2011, 05:33:37 AM
You are all being very unfair.  Uric acid kills germs, thus airborn urea particles kill airborn germs. 

So, to enjoy the full benefits of fresh air, this would mean that civilized urinating would involved as wide of an airborne dispersal as possible, right?
 aoaoaoaoao
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: xwarrior on February 16, 2011, 01:56:58 PM
I usually breathe out, not in, when I finish. Sometimes that turns into an 'ahhhhhhhhhh' of relief.

Must be doing it wrong.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on February 27, 2011, 10:59:37 AM
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/Fashion.jpg)

"Maybe That Cute Site Foreman Will Notice Me NOW!!!"

Apologies, by the way, for leaving the last one up and extra week. As the East Germans used to say, "I T'row De Hammah Nine Hunnert Meters Mit Der Gute Drugs!"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on February 28, 2011, 05:37:06 AM
I'm too sexy for my shirt too sexy for my shirt
So sexy it hurts
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on February 28, 2011, 08:02:29 AM
 ahahahahah  That's gotta be pshopped. Just too brilliant to be true.

Dalian asserts its position of leadership in the international fashion world with its breathtalking new men's summer fashions.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on February 28, 2011, 09:13:58 AM
Health care officials insist there is no danger to residents living downstream of the hormone manufacturing facility.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on February 28, 2011, 09:51:14 AM
ahahahahah  That's gotta be pshopped. Just too brilliant to be true.

Nah, it's Stil's new GF. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on February 28, 2011, 09:54:02 AM
ahahahahah  That's gotta be pshopped. Just too brilliant to be true.

Nah, it's Stil's new GF. ahahahahah


We call that her 'dancing bra'
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on February 28, 2011, 11:53:03 AM
"I dreamed I delivered 100 bike-truck loads of pressed soft-coal briquettes...
...in my Maidenform Bra!"

(Refs to an old US ad campaign; hope it still scans...)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on February 28, 2011, 04:12:20 PM
"Even Today, Few People Know The Tragic Agony Suffered By Dyslexic Transvestites."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on February 28, 2011, 11:36:36 PM
Sanlu employee still making mistakes.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on March 01, 2011, 01:55:37 AM
The Bro works both ways in China.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 01, 2011, 05:07:55 AM
"If only I could find matching panties."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on March 01, 2011, 08:24:40 AM
If he could, would he wear them backwards, or on his head?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on March 01, 2011, 08:32:49 PM
All I can Remember is going to a party for this "big nose" who was about to be married shortly. I think they called him EL!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on March 02, 2011, 12:28:11 PM
Sorry, no comment. It looks like a painting.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 03, 2011, 07:43:12 AM
Sorry, no comment. It looks like a painting.

Which painting?  Mona LisaThe ScreamDogs playing poker?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on March 07, 2011, 06:58:07 AM
New Meat!
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/girlsshirt.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 07, 2011, 07:09:59 AM
But she said she was over 18!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Just Like Mr Benn on March 07, 2011, 08:47:45 AM
Ok, I'm going to be the stupid one, and say that I don't get it. Is it something to do with the word on her T-Shirt, which I can't make out? It just looks like a photo of a cute little girl.

Not that I'm complaining. I think a week of the guy wearing the bra backwards caused me minor psychological damage.

Oh actually, I think I've got it; erotica, although I've been staring so hard at it the rorscarch (sic) thing above it has started looking like an angry owl getting ready for a gunfight.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: adamsmith on March 07, 2011, 09:13:04 AM
'maybe if i keep hinting mom will buy me that new mobile phone when she see's that i can hold it correctly.'
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on March 07, 2011, 01:19:46 PM
Coby? 
Here!
Swallow?
Here!
Erotica?
. . .
Erotica?
. . .
Erotica, get your fingers out of your ears, there's a good boy.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Ben-Dan on March 07, 2011, 01:34:46 PM
I just never get sick of those hair styles. I know I shouldn't be so biased one way or the other, but no matter how grumpy I'm feeling – if I'm feeling grumpy – I get cheered up as soon as I see one of those cute little girls with the elaborate hair. I can pass some businessmen on the street with furrowed brow carefully avoiding any eye contact, and then be all cheerful when a little girl points at me and calls me "lao Wai."

"Erotica" isn't appropriate however! My youngest student ever once wore a jacket with "Marlborough" on one sleeve and "Exxon" on the other.

Note: I agree with the poster about the guy with the bra on backwards. I'm so glad to be rid of that image. I'd try to scroll down before it would upload each time I came to the site. I was more comfortable with the Santa, and maybe even some of the stool images.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 07, 2011, 11:21:58 PM
Is this another one of Stil's girlfriends? mmmmmmmmmm
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on March 08, 2011, 07:31:04 AM
Not since she turned 8. bpbpbpbpbp

And the images are generally only up about a week each. Quitcher whining. cbcbcbcbcb
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Ben-Dan on March 08, 2011, 11:12:29 AM
Oh actually, I think I've got it; erotica, although I've been staring so hard at it the rorscarch (sic) thing above it has started looking like an angry owl getting ready for a gunfight.

Now that you point it out I can also see the owl, and it does also seem he's got some sort of appendages out ready to grab a gun out of a holster in a showdown. The owl is wearing a dress, too, as long as we're no the subject.

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on March 09, 2011, 04:29:41 PM
You can't see the image?  Tinkerbell got run over on the highway.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 11, 2011, 12:42:39 AM
Another sad case of a child who took candy from the wrong stranger. uuuuuuuuuu



(On a more serious note - Some parents need to be flogged and have their ability to reproduce removed using rusty scalpels.  This kid's parents probably couldn't read English, but the same sort of thing happens with some parents who can.)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: chinalin on March 11, 2011, 02:29:03 AM
Maybe I am going blind, or senile, or both, but I can't for the life of me work out what is written under the butterfly.  Someone please enlighten me!!  Please.

Lin
Zhaoqing, Guangdong.

 bxbxbxbxbx
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: dragonsaver on March 11, 2011, 03:06:03 AM
Erotica
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 11, 2011, 06:04:20 AM
Erotica

Congratulations DS!  That's the secret word of the day.  You've just won a free full-body massage by an Escaped Lunatic.  Please report to Dongguan to collect your prize. afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: dragonsaver on March 11, 2011, 07:57:41 AM
Dang EL.  Dalian is too far from Dongguan to go for a full body massage, even by you   afafafafaf

I will just have to dream about it  akakakakak awawawawaw

You can practice on your 'beloved' instead    agagagagag agagagagag bhbhbhbhbh
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on March 11, 2011, 08:04:32 AM
No, no...BY ALL MEANS show up, demand the full body massage, and let EL deal with the little lady after you've gone. Why, if you're lucky you might even see her take a wok upside his haid. uuuuuuuuuu ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on March 11, 2011, 01:07:28 PM
...
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on March 13, 2011, 08:13:09 AM
???

Anyway...Et Voila, Biches!

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/Trip042-1.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 14, 2011, 03:09:00 AM
I hate it when suddenness happens. asasasasas
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: piglet on March 14, 2011, 02:34:15 PM
Suddenness happening is a permanent state of affairs isn't it? Or was that the second glass of wine talking?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 15, 2011, 02:53:42 AM
Suddenness happening is a permanent state of affairs isn't it? Or was that the second glass of wine talking?

Only if you cross the railing. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on March 16, 2011, 02:22:11 AM
I believe suddenness is the Chinese euphemism for la duzi.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on March 16, 2011, 12:56:02 PM
bkbkbkbkbk
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on March 17, 2011, 03:31:46 PM
Now there's a security fence I'd install.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on March 21, 2011, 09:09:38 AM
Here's another one!
Babes In Khaki...wasn't that a Victor Herbert operetta back in the 1920s? mmmmmmmmmm

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/ladypilots.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 21, 2011, 09:25:05 AM
WOW! akakakakak akakakakak akakakakak akakakakak akakakakak akakakakak
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Pashley on March 21, 2011, 09:45:42 AM
The Right Stuff
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Ben-Dan on March 21, 2011, 12:27:21 PM
WOW! akakakakak akakakakak akakakakak akakakakak akakakakak akakakakak


Oh no. Down boy. heal. heal.

OK, the title is quite funny, but on an actual level I wonder if they are sexually repressed or have been anytime recently. I've only been in China in the last 4 years, but it seems there are sex shops EVERYWHERE with all sorts of implements and whatnots in them. I've actually never really looked in, well, more than enough to glimpse what sorts of things there were. It's enough to make me think, and I kind of do, that sex is the new, for lack of a better phrase, "opiate of the masses." Ironically, in the small towns you REALLY can't miss the pink houses and sex shops.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on March 21, 2011, 01:07:16 PM
Of course I'm carrying my mobile phone holster. I might have to SMS my classmate for help flying this thing, just like I did during the exam. You don't think I'm relying on the radio, do you?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on March 21, 2011, 01:30:08 PM
It may have passed her "white glove" test, but I still want to know where that hose was before she got ahold of it.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on March 21, 2011, 08:28:26 PM
"Go ahead, make my day" afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 22, 2011, 12:31:36 AM
Seven hours later, EL died with a smile permanently etched on his face. ababababab
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on March 22, 2011, 11:59:12 AM
I have a need, a need for speed
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: NATO on March 22, 2011, 02:02:48 PM
Although still dwarfing him in size, the director of Top Gun still felt these the most suitable stunt doubles for Tom Cruise.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 23, 2011, 02:04:10 AM
The drivers for the new Express Taxi service plan to give express trains some serious competition. ahahahahah

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 23, 2011, 05:37:12 AM
Helmet!  Check!
Visor!  Check!
Parachute!  Check!
Oxygen Mask!  Check!
Condoms!  Check!

Classes at the new Guangdong Number 1 University for Modern Sexual Studies are very detailed.  Our graduates can handle themselves in any situation.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on March 23, 2011, 07:41:16 AM
Quote
Helmet!  Check!
Visor!  Check!
Parachute!  Check!
Oxygen Mask!  Check!
Condoms!  Check!

Classes at the new Guangdong Number 1 University for Modern Sexual Studies are very detailed.  Our graduates can handle themselves in any situation.

Crosspost, OT, but...
Why the FT chose Eight Miles High for today's theme music
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on March 23, 2011, 08:14:06 AM
If they weren't so young and beautiful, you'd think they were ready to help Senor Boogie Woogie with his recent plight (not flight)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Ben-Dan on March 23, 2011, 08:28:27 AM
Maybe the helmets are hiding something. Are they beautiful? All is see is "students." If I hadn't just had a vacation I'd say it was time for one.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on March 23, 2011, 09:34:56 AM
Well, some are hidden by helmets, but I can see enough of the young lady on the left to know that I'd like to take her for a few gravity-defying, performance-maximizing test flights. afafafafaf

And I like to think those aren't oxygen masks. Maybe nitrous oxide to intensify the rush...or at least some helium so that when you shout out in ecstasy, your voice is three octaves higher. afafafafaf ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: NATO on March 23, 2011, 12:59:53 PM
or at least some helium so that when you shout out in ecstasy, your voice is three octaves higher. afafafafaf ahahahahah

hahaha, that would be sweet.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 23, 2011, 11:18:03 PM
or at least some helium so that when you shout out in ecstasy, your voice is three octaves higher. afafafafaf ahahahahah

hahaha, that would be sweet.

With some Chinese girls, 3 octaves higher would put the sound out of the range of human hearing. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on March 23, 2011, 11:28:01 PM
Dude...the helium is for YOU. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: zero on March 23, 2011, 11:46:07 PM
For the record, I would do those women.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Ben-Dan on March 24, 2011, 03:31:10 PM
And I like to think those aren't oxygen masks. Maybe nitrous oxide to intensify the rush...or at least some helium so that when you shout out in ecstasy, your voice is three octaves higher. afafafafaf ahahahahah

(http://www.examiner.com/images/blog/replicate/EXID22560/images/Dennis-Hopper-BlueVelvet.jpg)

I'm just sayin'
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on March 24, 2011, 11:46:40 PM
Great minds do think alike. agagagagag
Did you know that originally, in Blue Velvet, David Lynch wanted "Frank's" little canister to be full of helium to make his voice squeaky?
Dennis Hopper says he disagreed, wanting it to be full of some kind of drugs to make him act crazy.

Hopper said it wasn't until years later that he suddenly realized how much scarier and creepier Lynch's original idea really was... aoaoaoaoao
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 25, 2011, 06:24:59 AM
We may only be waitresses, but our new uniforms rock!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on March 25, 2011, 12:55:00 PM
Okay ladies. That there is the legendary Day Dreamer, he won't go without a fight. You girls are the best of the best and have been chosen for this job. This is a monumental task, but if we gang attack him, we may take him down. We may not do it, some of us may not even survive, but remember, it'll be worth it. For the greater good of every Chinese women, are you ready?















(Time for Day Dreamer's annual bath)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on March 26, 2011, 04:01:10 AM
 axaxaxaxax bkbkbkbkbk axaxaxaxax
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on March 26, 2011, 09:10:13 AM
Yup. axaxaxaxax bkbkbkbkbk axaxaxaxax
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on March 26, 2011, 01:15:25 PM
we could start a whole new thread just with the possible replies to that one, DD
 bfbfbfbfbf  ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on March 26, 2011, 07:49:53 PM
Hubba hubba!  Now I see why chicks dig flyboys.  It cuts both ways.  akakakakak
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on March 27, 2011, 04:36:39 AM
 bjbjbjbjbj
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on March 27, 2011, 05:48:56 AM
"That's right, Ice... man.  I am dangerous."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on March 28, 2011, 04:13:49 AM
The new one, reluctantly...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/RFL.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on March 28, 2011, 05:24:41 AM
Could you please show me where the spaghetti and meatballs stairwell are located?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 28, 2011, 06:14:14 AM
Rice Flour Noodle was mystified that the airline had anticipated his arrival.  He realized that now would be a good time to have a flashback to his childhood in the Shaolin Temple so that his old master could explain the situation to him.
 bjbjbjbjbj
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on March 28, 2011, 11:05:41 AM
Meanwhile, sweet and sour pork sipped a martini in the VIP lounge.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on March 28, 2011, 12:29:28 PM
I'm sure this is directed at the flies in the airport restaurant. they are being asked to wait outside the bowl while the waitstaff prepare the rice noodles. When the bowl is clean and the noodles are ready, the flies can go swimming again.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on March 31, 2011, 11:00:48 PM
Read 'em and weep, folks.
I know sometimes people get offended by the cover photos. Generally, I no longer give a rat's ass...but I WILL apologize in advance for this one.

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/GeneralLunaticAndFamily2.jpg)


Yes, that's Escaped Lunatic, appropriately attired.
PLEASE DON'T LAPSE INTO WEDDING CONGRATS ON THIS THREAD!
I'll start another thread for that. bjbjbjbjbj
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on April 01, 2011, 01:00:37 AM
Hongbao and other tribute can be delivered to this thread:

http://raoulschinasaloon.com/index.php?topic=6210.0

(Thanks El Hefe!)


My original caption suggestion was "Guess what fool Lunatic is getting married on April 1st?"

Other options:

It's good to be King!

World Domination:  It's a tough job, but someone has to do it.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on April 01, 2011, 02:24:12 AM
What are we going to do today, Daddy?
Same thing we do everyday, darlings. Plan to take over the world.

Every girl crazy 'bout a sharp dressed man

<BTW, lookin' good,EL!>
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: dragonsaver on April 01, 2011, 03:42:38 AM
World Domination the easy Lunatic way  akakakakak agagagagag agagagagag
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on April 01, 2011, 05:21:59 AM
General Lunatic prepares to address his subjects. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on April 01, 2011, 05:29:22 AM
Photoshop ain't what it used to be
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on April 01, 2011, 05:36:46 AM
I'm really liking this stretch of this thread. It's confirming how many of us can write MUCH funnier captions than EL can. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on April 01, 2011, 11:02:30 AM
In a surprise move, Burger King introduces two compelling new characters into the franchise mythology in an effort to capture the Chinese fast food buck.  The Burger Queen and Burger Princess will have it their way!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: flip on April 02, 2011, 04:05:25 AM
Escaped lunatic captures queen and her princess, locks them in one of his castles. Mario and Luigi vow for their safe return.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on April 02, 2011, 04:16:43 AM
Step right up folks and have your picture taken with an Escaped Lunatic, only $10.

For $20, you don't have to wear the Hallowe'en get-up

For $50, we could take out the Escaped Lunatic altogether.

(obviously these fine young ladies either didn't have the money or enjoy the novelty as they are the first and last)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on April 02, 2011, 08:15:46 AM
"Ah, yes, 'twas a grand night. But when the Admiral awoke the next day, the ladies were gone...as were his medals and his wallet."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: The Hiphoppopotomous on April 02, 2011, 10:57:20 AM
Wow so the Village People are taking things in a whole new direction
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on April 02, 2011, 01:15:22 PM
Hi, we're your host and hostess to this fine eating establishment (Burger King). And this lovely lady is your waitress so please tip her.

(sorry to poke fun at your new daughter, but you gragged her into this!)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on April 02, 2011, 04:14:04 PM
So, this is what has become of Sgt. Pepper and his band.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on April 04, 2011, 12:23:47 AM
So, this is what has become of Sgt. Pepper and his band.

Sergeant Pepper has just gotten a couple of new members for his band.

or

Come up to my castle to see my albums. afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on April 04, 2011, 12:26:07 AM
Two of the lovely doctors from the Guangzhou Number 7 Psychiatric Hospital attempt an experimental roleplay therapy to try to learn what's behind the worst case of Napoleon Complex they've ever seen.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on April 04, 2011, 12:27:36 AM
Will I ever be normal again?

I can't take credit for this, but my favourite caption has to be the leading thread title in the Champers' cabbers. That thread has gotta stay at the top as long as this pic is up.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on April 04, 2011, 01:42:05 AM
You're such a lovely audience,
We'd like to take you home with us,
We'd love to take you home.


After 20 years of singing about it, Sergeant Pepper finally succumbs to temptation and takes a couple of fangirl groupies home with him. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on April 10, 2011, 06:38:47 AM
This Week's Fresh Meat!

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/blucher.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on April 10, 2011, 06:42:47 AM
My alternate caption, for those who will understand it...

Blücher!!!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on April 10, 2011, 06:48:27 AM
2nd Alternate Caption:
"Sadly, Hefei's First and Only Comedy Club Was Doomed To Failure From the Start."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on April 10, 2011, 06:50:16 AM
Wait...I like the last caption better than the original, an I'm stickin' wid it. bfbfbfbfbf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on April 10, 2011, 03:10:42 PM
This sign was posted shortly after a visit by a one-time Seinfeld character.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on April 10, 2011, 03:11:32 PM
If not the horseplay noisy, then how the horseplay?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on April 10, 2011, 03:14:36 PM
Wasn't that a Captain Beefheart song?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on April 11, 2011, 02:24:30 AM
My alternate caption, for those who will understand it...

Blücher!!!

LMAO!!!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on April 12, 2011, 07:21:58 AM
If not the horseplay noisy, then how the horseplay?

Brilliant...wish I'd thought of that. ROTFLMAO. ahahahahah bkbkbkbkbk
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: NATO on April 12, 2011, 10:50:18 AM
It's a mighty-fine find this weeks avatar, keeping me amused for sure.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on April 14, 2011, 08:38:38 AM
I just noticed the sign says HORSELAUGH, not horseplay. Oh well ee-ther eye-ther
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on April 15, 2011, 01:21:41 AM
I think it means to keep the whores from laughing too loudly. ahahahahah


I just noticed the sign says HORSELAUGH, not horseplay. Oh well ee-ther eye-ther

If horseplay is fun, horselaughs may occur. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on April 17, 2011, 11:39:09 PM
Ah, ze wheel of ze covair peectures, she keeps always ze turning...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/closeurine.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on April 17, 2011, 11:58:50 PM
truth in advertising makes its China debut
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on April 18, 2011, 02:22:43 AM
Welcome to the Golden Showers resort. bbbbbbbbbb
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on April 18, 2011, 04:47:17 AM
Well, I'm all in favour of urinary reform.Anit-corruption measures begin at the most basic levels- I always say, show me a man who pees from a distance, I'll show you an embezzler.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on April 18, 2011, 05:57:32 AM
I said I want a "groupie" not a "group pee"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on April 18, 2011, 09:46:32 PM
"So, the next time you're at a public urinal, put your free arm around the waist of the guy using the adjacent spot, pull him close to you, and start talking about your feelings. It'll be no end of civilized!"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on April 18, 2011, 09:57:33 PM
"The poorly-worded sign didn't really specify what you were supposed to get closer to while urinating, so next time he had to pee Xiao Feng chose to get closer to the crisply-uniformed PSB officer who had been examining everyone's documents and luggage."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on April 19, 2011, 02:26:16 AM
When planning events for the next Inter-Provincial games, one of the organizers misunderstood the expression "Pissing contest".  The rest, as they say, is history.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: flip on April 19, 2011, 05:56:49 AM
In order to move forward as a civilized country, the Chinese are now promoting "fencing" over the ever-so-popular "sword-fighting."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on April 22, 2011, 01:39:46 AM
Sociologists at the Beijing Institute for the Promotion of Public Harmony recently began a carefully crafted experiment to test the old adage, "It's better to be pissed off than to be pissed on."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on April 23, 2011, 05:10:46 AM
"Yes, it IS civilized to get close to urinate. So next time you're bleeding the ol' lizard at a busy public urinal, put your free arm around the waist of the guy next to you and start telling him about your deepest personal feelings. Everyone will be real impressed by how civilized you are! bfbfbfbfbf "
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on April 23, 2011, 06:32:37 AM
"Yes, it IS civilized to get close to urinate. So next time you're bleeding the ol' lizard at a busy public urinal, put your free arm around the waist of the guy next to you and start telling him about your deepest personal feelings. Everyone will be real impressed by how civilized you are! bfbfbfbfbf "

Wasn't that the first step to the downfall of the Classic Greek Civilization?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on April 23, 2011, 02:06:30 PM
And no honest man would tinkle from afar.

But a sportsman will poop for distance.

And leave the door ajar.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on April 24, 2011, 10:46:40 PM
Wasn't that the first step to the downfall of the Classic Greek Civilization?

ClassicAL Greek Civilization?

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/hoplites.jpg)

Yes...after eventually evolving into a bunch of la-de-da fruit salads, their ancient culture was finally done in by Romans and by a seemingly endless series of filthy, 2-bit hordes coming out of Central Asia. Sadly, I know nothing of the Classical Greek language, written or spoken.


ClassIC Greek Civilization?

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/joeflaherty.jpg)

No...Happily, they are still alive and well and with us. I've picked up a phrase or two of Classic Greek, such as "Close de dam door...I got de dam air-conditionin' on!"

(If you'd like to learn a short conversation in Classic Greek, try http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gxp0_DJotZ8 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gxp0_DJotZ8))
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on April 24, 2011, 10:57:42 PM
Anyway...up and at 'em, kids!

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/frog-earthquake-china.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: old34 on April 25, 2011, 12:29:45 AM
I remember seeing that picture shortly after the Sichuan earthquake. It was taken a few days before the earthquake struck. Many thought that the frogs' appearance was a pre-indicator of the coming earthquake (something about thermal temperatures below ground were heating up so the frogs migrated).
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: old34 on April 25, 2011, 12:32:26 AM
Yeah, here's the article, with the same picture:
http://www.weirdasianews.com/2008/05/13/frog-migration-omen-to-china-earthquake-disaster/ (http://www.weirdasianews.com/2008/05/13/frog-migration-omen-to-china-earthquake-disaster/)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: flip on April 25, 2011, 03:59:37 AM
Frogger Fans Take To The Streets, Forget To Release One At A Time.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on April 25, 2011, 08:35:34 AM
One of the kids on a bike - "20 points each!  RAMMING SPEED!!!!"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on April 25, 2011, 09:01:41 AM
Stupid French restaurant! I knew we shouldn't have answered that help wanted sign
 
"Ohhh la-de-da, multiple openings, no experience required but you must be a frog"

C'mon buys, lets find that stupid princess
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on April 25, 2011, 11:16:02 AM
Just in time for the end of Passover...
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on April 25, 2011, 11:57:33 AM
After the plagues of silkworms and chickens' feet failed, Moses was sure that this time the frogs would do the trick.
"And if this doesn't work, I'm giving up and moving to Egypt"
And the rest, as they say, is history religion
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on April 25, 2011, 01:31:20 PM
*pop-pop*

*pop-pop pop pop*

*pop pop poppop pop pop*

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on April 25, 2011, 02:08:37 PM
After the plagues of silkworms and chickens' feet failed, Moses was sure that this time the frogs would do the trick.
"And if this doesn't work, I'm giving up and moving to Egypt"
And the rest, as they say, is history religion

uhm, moving to Canaan
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on April 25, 2011, 02:09:53 PM
Hey, did you hear what that dyke frog say to the other lesbian frog?


We do taste like chicken!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on April 26, 2011, 05:13:39 AM
Later that day, frog baseball was successfully introduced in China.
 aaaaaaaaaa
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on April 26, 2011, 05:32:39 AM
Wow...Frog Baseball.
There's a concept I haven't heard in a coon's age... bgbgbgbgbg
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: fullricebowl on April 28, 2011, 05:46:01 AM
This reminds me of a late night driving across the Texas panhandle.. pretty sure we ran over about 15 rabbits that night while trying our best to avoid them.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on April 28, 2011, 06:02:04 AM
The Froggish Empire's conquest of Earth would have been unstoppable, except for the unfortunate selection of France and China to be the initial deployment sites of their ground forces. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: piglet on April 28, 2011, 06:14:11 AM
 axaxaxaxax
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: NATO on April 28, 2011, 09:57:14 AM
We all know they love to be the biggest,be the best and have the most, but the chinese version of Frogger really took the piss.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: NATO on April 28, 2011, 06:55:12 PM
Damn just realise flip already did the frogger thing.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: flip on April 29, 2011, 08:25:05 PM
Damn just realise flip already did the frogger thing.

Different spice, different flavour!  Which is actually what those bikers must be thinking.  iiiiiiiiii
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on May 01, 2011, 01:30:29 AM
One for the boyos. Think you can find some ammo here? uuuuuuuuuu

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/condom-show-china09.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on May 01, 2011, 01:32:02 AM
Oh, we had some glorious times...but when we'd used her last condom, I dumped her and moved on.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on May 01, 2011, 02:03:17 AM
Say, wadda ya think I am, a walkin' drug store or sumthin'?
You touch my dress, you better be ready to pay for it, buster.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on May 01, 2011, 10:52:42 AM


Lawrence Welk, eat your heart out cccccccccc
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on May 01, 2011, 02:13:45 PM
I can hear her now,

"The first guy that fills them all is my future husband!"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on May 01, 2011, 08:32:35 PM
"Now that I have your full attention dear!"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: NATO on May 02, 2011, 02:12:45 AM
After weeks of research YoYo was surprised to find out that what here mum had always told her was true - drinking dishwashing liquid DOES make you fart bubbles!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 02, 2011, 05:04:11 AM
"But the instructions clearly said to put on condoms before intercourse."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on May 02, 2011, 05:08:17 AM
How the hell am I supposed to "pull a train" with this getup

(If you don't know what it means, don't look it up)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 02, 2011, 05:38:04 AM
Raoul, this isn't quite what I had in mind when I asked for more Chinese babes in uniforms. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on May 02, 2011, 06:13:09 AM
Raoul, this isn't quite what I had in mind when I asked for more Chinese babes in uniforms. ahahahahah


Why not, she doesn't need luggage, she's wearing everything she'll need for a trip around the world with me   afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 04, 2011, 03:28:40 AM
Our new Bar Girl line of dresses makes sure you'll always be prepared no matter how successful your evening is.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on May 04, 2011, 10:57:58 AM
After years of criticism of its environmental practices, China's bold new initiative takes the 4 R's WAY too far.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 05, 2011, 03:19:57 AM
She's too sexy for her dress
So sexy it's a mess
She's too sexy
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 06, 2011, 02:19:01 AM
Just twist the valve and they all fill with helium so you can fly away.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on May 09, 2011, 08:23:28 AM
Gee, I hated to take that last one down...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/Youhere.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 09, 2011, 09:50:00 AM
No matter where you go, there you are. - Buckaroo Banzai
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Tai_Li on May 09, 2011, 11:17:56 AM
I've got a great picture that I think would be perfect for the avatar. How do I get it along to somebody who might be able to do something with it?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Ben-Dan on May 09, 2011, 12:13:21 PM
That's all fine and good, but WHEN am I?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on May 09, 2011, 01:48:13 PM
Could you be a little more vague?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on May 09, 2011, 05:06:46 PM
Quote
I've got a great picture that I think would be perfect for the avatar. How do I get it along to somebody who might be able to do something with

Email it to Raoul, Tai.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 10, 2011, 02:03:17 AM
That's all fine and good, but WHEN am I?

The time is now.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on May 10, 2011, 07:06:10 AM
How can you be in two places at once, when you're not anywhere at all? mmmmmmmmmm

Anyway.
Tai Li and anyone else, just e-mail your picture to me at yochinaraoul@yahoo.com. If I see something I can use in it, I'll run it and acknowledge your help. bjbjbjbjbj
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on May 10, 2011, 10:48:27 AM
I want to be there!  Stop rubbing it in.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 10, 2011, 10:57:26 AM
How can you be in two places at once, when you're not anywhere at all? mmmmmmmmmm

Try cloning yourself.  It's a great way to be many places at once. ababababab
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: old34 on May 10, 2011, 03:12:28 PM
How can you be in two places at once, when you're not anywhere at all? mmmmmmmmmm

Try cloning yourself.  It's a great way to be many places at once. ababababab


Went straight over his head(s), Boss. He is not worthy.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on May 11, 2011, 06:56:15 AM
Went straight over his head(s), Boss. He is not worthy.

Indeed. ahahahahah ahahahahah ahahahahah ahahahahah ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 12, 2011, 01:50:33 AM
Went straight over his head(s), Boss. He is not worthy.

Indeed. ahahahahah ahahahahah ahahahahah ahahahahah ahahahahah

Just because you guys aren't anywhere at all doesn't mean that I can't be two places at once. asasasasas asasasasas asasasasas
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 12, 2011, 02:16:04 AM
Can we truly trust the accuracy of such a sign?  A broken clock is right twice per day.  That sign is only right when you and the sign are in proximity to each other.  If you leave, the sign probably does not change to say "You are not here." (Video surveillance when no one is in the sign's presence may be needed to reduce the chances pf any Schrodinger-esque observation issues further complicating the problem.)

A much more accurate version would state something like:

If you are reading this sign, then you are probably fairly close to it.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on May 12, 2011, 06:34:16 AM
But what if the sign was not here when you read it but there instead? You could have been there, but there's no proof that you are all here or you are all there?

Just to prove it to you EL, hasn't anyone asked you if you are all there?   mmmmmmmmmm


 uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on May 12, 2011, 06:36:53 AM
All I want for this sign is a small arrow under the main message, marked "Complaints"...

And don't fret, EL. You are adept in the ways of Marx (Groucho) and Lennon (John), yet your education remains sadly incomplete. But don't give up...quid Marlburgh im Plano, If you push something hard enough, it will fall over , end quote. Perhaps if you'll stand on that yellow rubber line there, you can get to More Science High School! Oops! A:/The System is less energetic when domains of alternate direction alternate. Oh well, you didn't Beat The Reaper. Check his body paint, Old34- faded San Francisco Art Nouveau! Let's do him a favor and send him in for re-grooving.

Shoes for Industry, compadre. agagagagag
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 12, 2011, 06:48:50 AM
But what if the sign was not here when you read it but there instead? You could have been there, but there's no proof that you are all here or you are all there?

Just to prove it to you EL, hasn't anyone asked you if you are all there?   mmmmmmmmmm

 uuuuuuuuuu

I pride myself in never being all anywhere. ahahahahah


Optimally then, the signs should be everywhere and say "If you can read this, then you are probably close enough to read it.  If you can't read this, then maybe you are too far away to read it or perhaps you are illiterate."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on May 12, 2011, 10:22:08 AM
So ... I am "HUR"... not "him"...not "Thur"..."HUR"  Cool!! bfbfbfbfbf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on May 12, 2011, 10:23:31 AM
Everybody has got to be somewhere...............and you are here!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on May 12, 2011, 11:06:19 AM
Optimally then, the signs should be everywhere and say "If you can read this, then you are probably close enough to read it.  If you can't read this, then maybe you are too far away to read it or perhaps you are illiterate."

You mean something like this?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 12, 2011, 12:40:06 PM
Optimally then, the signs should be everywhere and say "If you can read this, then you are probably close enough to read it.  If you can't read this, then maybe you are too far away to read it or perhaps you are illiterate."

You mean something like this?

Love it!!!!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on May 12, 2011, 02:32:09 PM
What happens when you cross Jerzy Kosinski with Jean-Paul Sartre?
Being There and Nothingness
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on May 13, 2011, 11:09:53 PM
I can't read Chinese, hell, I can barely read English. But has anyone noticed how that last character looks like E.T.?  Maybe that's the reason for the sign
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Cassnadra on May 14, 2011, 04:34:13 AM
So what's you are saying DD is that the sign actually reads:

'Your position is ET'?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Ben-Dan on May 15, 2011, 07:09:16 AM
I can't read Chinese, hell, I can barely read English. But has anyone noticed how that last character looks like E.T.?  Maybe that's the reason for the sign

Ha, I finally looked at the character and it really DOES look like ET, arms extended.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Cassnadra on May 15, 2011, 07:21:15 AM
So what's you are saying DD

Oh nice use of the language there Cassandra... jeebus  bibibibibi
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on May 15, 2011, 09:28:06 AM
So what's you are saying DD is that the sign actually reads:

'Your position is ET'?

So, first you can't spell, now your grammar is suspect. One more flub and you'll be just as good as our managers (they are foreigners  bibibibibi)


 ahahahahah

Actually my position is reverse cowgirl BUT only when (as the sign says) you are here

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Cassnadra on May 15, 2011, 09:59:46 AM
 bkbkbkbkbk
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: piglet on May 15, 2011, 04:46:07 PM
I always like this one:(http://www.musictreasures.com/catalog_resized/Media/331154.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 23, 2011, 01:17:40 AM
The world was supposed to end on May 21st, but I'm still here.

Is this a good thing or a bad thing? mmmmmmmmmm
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on May 23, 2011, 03:00:25 AM
No you're not, you are there. You should be here

There. Bad

Here. Good


 bfbfbfbfbf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on May 23, 2011, 05:49:22 AM
New photo. Technical problems with the caption, though, under repair...
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/pondcarrier.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on May 23, 2011, 06:04:23 AM
Size DOES matter
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on May 23, 2011, 06:45:27 AM
At least they can't sink us
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 23, 2011, 06:46:49 AM
In an amazing legislative coup during these times of tight budgets, the State of Oklahoma gets a new Navy base, complete with a nuclear powered aircraft carrier, the Raoul Duke.

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Crippler on May 23, 2011, 07:02:57 AM
Chinese remake of Philadelphia Experiment... Working title "Turn it around stupid."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 23, 2011, 07:26:13 AM
DONGGUAN:  Lunatic and Dragon Boat Fanatic Surprises Village.

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on May 23, 2011, 07:41:51 AM
You know, I don't mind tking the boat acros the lake, its that 3Million RMB toll that's a bitch
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 23, 2011, 07:51:12 AM
Although it looked like those living on the northern shore had the advantage, the fleet of submarines dispatched from the southern shore soon changed the equation.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on May 23, 2011, 01:30:02 PM
"There!" said comrade Wang, with a smile of smug satisfaction. "My son went to Beida, his son went to Oxford. I bought a Ferrari, he bought a helicopter. I bought my wife a fur coat, he bought his Ming dynasty jewelry. Let him top this!"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: the_otter on May 23, 2011, 02:04:08 PM
Geologists predict extensive oceanification within thirty millennia: China plans ahead.

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: chinalin on May 23, 2011, 02:07:17 PM
I thought that global warming was supposed to mean the water level would rise!!??


Chinalin
Zhaoqing, Guangdong.

 bxbxbxbxbx
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: The Local Dialect on May 23, 2011, 02:55:51 PM
Chinese remake of Philadelphia Experiment... Working title "Turn it around stupid."

ahahahahah

This has got to be the best front page picture ever.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: dragonsaver on May 23, 2011, 11:56:00 PM
I totally agree   bjbjbjbjbj agagagagag agagagagag agagagagag agagagagag
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 24, 2011, 01:56:34 AM
You sank my battleship!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: piglet on May 24, 2011, 09:39:54 AM
I'm hoping this was the Simpsons quote  ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: adamsmith on May 24, 2011, 10:00:01 AM
CHINA DEVELOPS NEW STEALTH CARRIER: guaranteed never to be seen on the ocean
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 24, 2011, 10:25:06 AM
There's no debating who's the biggest fish in that pond.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on May 24, 2011, 12:46:58 PM
Excuse me m'am. Is this the way to Qingdao?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 25, 2011, 01:27:47 AM
Don't just stand there.  Start digging a canal to the ocean!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on May 25, 2011, 07:22:05 AM
Man, when they said there's a water shortage, they weren't kidding
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 26, 2011, 03:49:51 AM
He bought a 4 bedroom house, so I bought a 6 bedroom house.
He bought a Cadillac, so I bought a Mercedes.
He married a 25 year old blond, so I married a 22 year old redhead.
He went skiing in the Rockies, so I went skiing in the Alps.
He's just bought a new boat and now I don't know what to do.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on May 26, 2011, 07:28:12 AM
He bought a 4 bedroom house, so I bought a 6 bedroom house.
He bought a Cadillac, so I bought a Mercedes.
He married a 25 year old blond, so I married a 22 year old redhead.
He went skiing in the Rockies, so I went skiing in the Alps.
He's just bought a new boat and now I don't know what to do.


Buy the lake and drain it   ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on May 29, 2011, 08:44:28 PM
Although I travel through the valley of death, I fear no evil.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 30, 2011, 07:23:14 AM
Bill Gates.  If you liked his toy boat, wait until you see how big his new rubber ducky is.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on May 30, 2011, 11:29:36 AM
New Cover. Get weird. uuuuuuuuuu

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/fishkiss.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on May 30, 2011, 01:40:36 PM
These mixed relationships never work out


(hey boss, I didn't realize I gave you that pic too)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: zero on May 30, 2011, 01:56:56 PM
Hate to admit it, but I would still do her, EVEN if she insisted on holding onto the fish the whole time.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on May 30, 2011, 02:06:23 PM
Germany: a boot of beer
China: a fish of baijiu.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on May 30, 2011, 02:20:17 PM
Oh, so THAT was what that smell was.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: adamsmith on May 30, 2011, 03:02:02 PM
if eating crackers wasn't enough, mei mei thought this would do the trick
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Pashley on May 30, 2011, 03:12:43 PM
Not the bass, silly, the bass player!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: piglet on May 30, 2011, 04:39:11 PM
There are two things that smell of fish and one of them is fish  afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on May 30, 2011, 08:20:09 PM
Hmph! Look at that stupid girl. She really believes that if she kisses that fish, it will turn into a handsome Prince. bibibibibi
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on May 30, 2011, 10:02:55 PM
There are two things that smell of fish and one of them is fish  afafafafaf

 bkbkbkbkbk
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 30, 2011, 11:16:15 PM
Some fish have all the luck.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on May 31, 2011, 03:28:37 AM
you should have seen the one that got away
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 31, 2011, 04:14:12 AM
Hmph! Look at that stupid girl. She really believes that if she kisses that fish, it will turn into a handsome Prince. bibibibibi

And then the frog turned into a handsome fish and they lived happily ever after. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 31, 2011, 06:06:50 AM
Hang on a sec - she's got bunny ears.  Could that be our very own AMonk passionately kissing that fish? mmmmmmmmmm

If so, I'm even more jealous of that lucky fish! asasasasas
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on May 31, 2011, 09:32:04 AM
Hang on a sec - she's got bunny ears.  Could that be our very own AMonk passionately kissing that fish? mmmmmmmmmm


 aoaoaoaoao NO WAY!!!!  I'm fair-haired ababababab and happily married akakakakak
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on May 31, 2011, 10:32:36 AM
If you guys like that pic that I took, you should see the pic the fish took of Miss Bunny Ears kissing me


OHH LA LA
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on May 31, 2011, 04:09:02 PM
It's rarely discussed publicly, but there's a long tradition of both men and women having relationships with female fish. George Gershwin even alluded to it in the operetta Porgy and Bass , especially in the song Bass, You Is My Woman Now . adadadadad
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: memnoch87 on May 31, 2011, 04:51:14 PM
Billy the Big Mouth Bass enjoying retirement in China!


 bhbhbhbhbh
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on June 01, 2011, 12:09:39 AM
I wish
I wish
I wish I was that fish
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Cassnadra on June 01, 2011, 12:33:46 AM
'Caviar Emptor'
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on June 01, 2011, 01:12:43 AM
Little do you guys know that Little Miss Bunny is really Cassandra and she's just trying to make me jealous


and its working
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Cassnadra on June 01, 2011, 02:13:12 AM
Jealous I look so good in tin foil?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on June 01, 2011, 03:02:24 AM
Jealous I look so good in tin foil?

Definitely.  Have you seen how tacky Day Dreamer's tinfoil dress is?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Cassnadra on June 01, 2011, 03:15:10 AM
No but I can believe that... ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on June 01, 2011, 05:01:49 AM
I don't know about you, but that's the last time I order blowfish   bibibibibi
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on June 01, 2011, 05:03:21 AM
Jealous I look so good in tin foil?

fish

hot chick

tin foil

Only thing missing is the BBQ and cold beers
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on June 01, 2011, 05:04:47 AM
I knew I had to blow my date but not his dinner too
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on June 01, 2011, 05:30:07 AM
O, that I were a scale upon that fish, That I might touch that cheek!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Cassnadra on June 01, 2011, 05:53:38 AM
Mmmmm beer.

Where can that fish be?
It is a most elusive fish!
And it went wherever I did go.
Ooooh, fishy, fishy, fishy fish!
A-fish, a-fish, a-fish, a-fishy, ooooh.
Ooooh, fishy, fishy, fishy fish!
That went wherever I did go.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on June 01, 2011, 04:18:54 PM
Miss Qingdao stumbled in the Question and Answer round, but won the crowd back with her rousing rendition of "Superstar" on her custom-built trombone.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: adamsmith on June 01, 2011, 10:42:49 PM
Little Mei Mei kept confusing Carpe Diem with seize the carp
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on June 02, 2011, 12:52:57 AM
I was talking about strange fads to my students.
I made the mistake of mentioning live goldfish swallowing.
They said they could do that, only bigger and better.
Now their families are suing me for negligent homicide.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Pashley on June 02, 2011, 01:10:48 AM
Chinese equivalent of "If ... happens, I'll eat my hat."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on June 02, 2011, 01:43:41 AM
The Pearl River piranha has a unique method of luring its prey.  First, the victim is hypnotized and given an uncontrollable desire to hold the fish and kiss it.
 
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on June 02, 2011, 01:53:25 AM
"My God, its hideous! I'll kiss it, but if it gives me the tongue, I'm going to throw up!"












said the fish
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on June 02, 2011, 04:27:33 AM
Earth Girls Are Easy.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on June 04, 2011, 01:38:44 PM
Actually, she wasn't that easy, until I mentioned that I spawn in north america. Then it was "How soon can you get me a green card?"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on June 04, 2011, 01:40:03 PM
Nobody's watching this, right? I wouldn't want my wife to see me kissing another girl
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on June 04, 2011, 02:16:54 PM
This cigar tastes fishy
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on June 06, 2011, 01:52:31 AM
What?  You mean this isn't a kissing fish!?!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on June 06, 2011, 02:03:38 AM
The Incredible Mr. Limpet makes his triumphant return
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on June 06, 2011, 04:25:42 AM
Bunny, the Little Mermaid's little sister just announced her engagement.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Crippler on June 06, 2011, 07:04:00 AM
I don't know Doc.A couple of days ago it was just a pimple. Now I have great trouble trying to swim with this hanging from my lip.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Lone Traveller on June 06, 2011, 01:56:33 PM
haha!  bkbkbkbkbk
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: adamsmith on June 07, 2011, 01:16:17 AM
in honour of dragonboat festival allow me to feed you some rice. I have already chewed it for you. afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on June 07, 2011, 01:54:26 AM
Their forbidden romance was filled with passion and excitement.  It came to a tragic end when her parents misunderstood her when she said she was bringing home a surprise for dinner and they cooked him.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Lone Traveller on June 07, 2011, 05:09:49 AM
 bkbkbkbkbk

 ahahahahah ahahahahah ahahahahah ahahahahah ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on June 08, 2011, 08:06:29 AM
Damn, I knew there was fish scales in lipstick, but this Passion Poisson goes over the top
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on June 08, 2011, 08:12:21 AM
Another sad tale of a bored and lonely housewife getting involved with an immoral fish while her husband works at a factory in another province.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on June 10, 2011, 03:54:27 AM
The new one. Sorry to be late. I was...detained.

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/womensurinal.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on June 10, 2011, 06:01:44 AM
I'm so happy you escaped to give us something new. agagagagag  I loved the fish pic, but the new headers for it were beginning to flounder. ahahahahah


To boldly go where no woman has gone before.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Just Like Mr Benn on June 10, 2011, 06:33:28 AM
Oh my Lady Kaka!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: old34 on June 10, 2011, 08:20:35 AM
So this device can be found in the first room as opposed to the second?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on June 10, 2011, 08:34:14 PM
Damn! I don't read Chinese. Am I in the right toilet? bibibibibi
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: piglet on June 11, 2011, 01:06:49 PM
160 kwai for a poop? that's damned expensive even for the Ritz.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on June 11, 2011, 05:48:15 PM
That's not where you ladies wash your face is it?

 :wtf:
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on June 13, 2011, 02:49:57 AM
Maybe this is in the restroom for Thai lady-boys. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Cassnadra on June 15, 2011, 01:43:13 AM
What's wrong with a fem-funnel...?

http://www.mec.ca/Products/product_detail.jsp?PRODUCT%3C%3Eprd_id=845524441931845&FOLDER%3C%3Efolder_id=2534374302695889
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on June 15, 2011, 03:15:57 AM
A new way to stand up for women's rights!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on June 18, 2011, 10:33:01 AM
You mean stand up for you sit down rights

 bibibibibi
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on June 20, 2011, 10:12:46 AM
I wonder if using one of these would make the user feel flushed with success. mmmmmmmmmm
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: adamsmith on June 22, 2011, 12:00:43 PM
when being fired in China call 119, firemen need entertainment too.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on June 22, 2011, 12:01:55 PM
Looks like El Hefe forgot to post the pic here.

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/firemen.jpg)


"Hello, my company just announced layoffs and I'm being fired.  The sign said to call 119."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on June 22, 2011, 12:05:03 PM
Having trouble getting that building burned down?  Call Zhao Qing Fire Services and we'll torch it for you for reasonable rates.  Here at Zhao Qing, our motto is "If it can be burned, we'll burn it for you!"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on June 22, 2011, 12:10:47 PM
Didn't forget...I was still fine-tuning the photo when you knuckleheads started posting. uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on June 22, 2011, 12:57:23 PM
Actually, I'm a little surprised. I'd have thought that the firemen would have hotter suggestions. But hey, what do I know
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on June 22, 2011, 01:32:43 PM
10. 跳舞青年会费100元/消防员

Dancing to YMCA costs 100 rmb/fireman
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Paul on June 22, 2011, 01:55:51 PM
It's bizarre how often the Village People raise their heads here.

Is that really what it says?

My MDBG translator says just that, but unfortunately Her Indoors has got the strange idea that these avatars are taking the piss out of Chinese people, and so refuses to help me here.

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Just Like Mr Benn on June 22, 2011, 11:54:01 PM
Conversely, if your office is on fire, you should play computer games, ask the blonde from Finance out on a date and purposely f**k up your job role for your successor, before calmly leaving the building in 4 week's time.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on June 23, 2011, 02:06:21 AM
Attention Ladies!  Our hot firemen have some warm suggestions to heat up your nights.  Give us a call and we'll rush right over and rescue you from a cold and lonely evening. They are guaranteed to light your fire. afafafafaf


It's bizarre how often the Village People raise their heads here.

The bizarre part is that I (who proudly live in a village) am not the only one bringing them up. Makes me wonder what excuse anyone else has. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Paul on June 23, 2011, 02:31:29 AM
My excuse: I've just been playing YMCA - no, really!

Can anyone give a full translation of the warm suggestions, please?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on June 23, 2011, 03:47:36 AM
Can anyone give a full translation of the warm suggestions, please?

I'd love to, but . . .

I never learned how to read!  I'm illiterate. ananananan ananananan ananananan
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on June 23, 2011, 05:05:08 AM
I'm illiterate. ananananan ananananan ananananan

Your parents were never married?

Or was your dad one of the firemen?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on June 23, 2011, 06:20:30 AM
Oh, I'm a fireman and I'm OK
I sleep all night and I work all day
I swing around brass poles and
dance to YMCA

he's a fireman and he's OK
he sleeps all night and he works all day
he swings around brass poles and
dances YMCA

Oh, I'm a fireman and I'm just fine
I eat my quiche with a dry white wine
beneath my rubber suit I've
silk undies with spagghetti strings
Putting out your fire buys me life's finer things!

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: piglet on June 23, 2011, 06:49:56 AM
 eeeeeeeeee axaxaxaxax ayayayayay bnbnbnbnbn bnbnbnbnbn
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on June 23, 2011, 08:52:53 AM
That's great lfd, you should put it to music, maybe wear a lumberjack's fireman's outfit.

ayayayayay

Now that's something completely different
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Paul on June 23, 2011, 09:27:00 AM
Can anyone give a full translation of the warm suggestions, please?

I'd love to, but . . .

I never learned how to read!  I'm illiterate. ananananan ananananan ananananan


I was about to say, 'you silly bastard', but Day Dreamer beat me to the post.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Paul on June 23, 2011, 09:59:12 AM
Oh, I'm a fireman and I'm OK
I sleep all night and I work all day
I swing around brass poles and
dance to YMCA


<snip>


You just made me homesick!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on June 23, 2011, 10:22:30 AM
Oh, I'm a fireman and I'm OK
I sleep all night and I work all day
I swing around brass poles and
dance to YMCA


<snip>


You just made me homesick!

For your job at the fire department? mmmmmmmmmm
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on June 23, 2011, 08:34:03 PM
All warm suggestions, by firemen, gratefully received. uuuuuuuuuu (Except from two of my brothers who have retired from the Fire Brigade in Townsville)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Paul on June 24, 2011, 02:16:02 PM
Oh, I'm a fireman and I'm OK
I sleep all night and I work all day
I swing around brass poles and
dance to YMCA


<snip>


You just made me homesick!

For your job at the fire department? mmmmmmmmmm


No, back home I was a lumberjack.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on June 24, 2011, 08:53:24 PM
Her Indoors has got the strange idea that these avatars are taking the piss out of Chinese people, and so refuses to help me here.

Yowtch! aoaoaoaoao
Geez, I hope you can get her past that notion, because...we're not.
(Well, not usually, anyway. But we take the piss out of EVERYONE sooner or later 'round here. uuuuuuuuuu )

Tell her sometimes the English usage in China is so bad we have to laugh at it...but this is a good-natured foreign-language thing happening worldwide, not really aimed at the Chinese. We just happen to nearly all live or have lived in China, so it's the place we're interested in.

Sometimes the real butt of the jokes is the laowai, not the Chinese.
You can tell her that said laowai quite often don't seem to pick up on this fact. uuuuuuuuuu

And...sometimes, when you visit another country that requires such a vast cultural shift, you quite often see things you have absolutely no hope of understanding. After a while, developing lunatic theories about what those things might mean becomes sort of a fun little game you play. This isn't being insulting, it's coming to terms with our own foreignness.

Hope those help. agagagagag
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Paul on June 25, 2011, 03:16:40 PM
She's been around me and my friends for a good few years.  So you'd think she'd see the other side.

But she's Chinese!

I'll tell you a true story:

"My grandfather and grandmother owned lots of land. They were very rich. When I was maybe 2 years old they killed my grandfather, and my grandmother put herself into a deep well and died.  Now we are just normal good people."

Duke, I try.

But you know how nationalistic and sensitive people are.


She now thinks the English are filthy scum (with good reason, I should add, and can't understand how we came to rule half the world and teach the Yanks how to speak proper.

Oh, the pleasures of marrying into the CP!!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Paul on June 25, 2011, 03:18:01 PM
)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on June 27, 2011, 04:23:34 AM
And...sometimes, when you visit another country that requires such a vast cultural shift, you quite often see things you have absolutely no hope of understanding. After a while, developing lunatic theories about what those things might mean becomes sort of a fun little game you play.

There's nothing lunatic about my theories!  ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: psd4fan on June 27, 2011, 12:28:30 PM
I wanna order number 4. Anything with ass in the name can't be all bad can it?  :lickass:
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on June 27, 2011, 12:47:35 PM
This is why the first 100 characters I learned to read were common on menus.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on June 28, 2011, 12:29:03 AM
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/menu2.jpg)

Mmmmnnnn... sauced justice and roast heef.  I'll take a plate of both of those.

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on June 28, 2011, 01:56:31 AM
I'm pretty sure the last is a command or direction, EL. There are a bunch of Budhass human relations in the kitchen, and I want you and your clones to get in there and roast the heef out of 'em!

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on June 28, 2011, 04:10:50 AM
 bkbkbkbkbk
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Cassnadra on June 28, 2011, 04:13:37 AM
Those shedding sour beans are so vain I bet they think this menu's about them.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: piglet on June 28, 2011, 05:54:33 AM
I think Paul has a babecue doesn't he?  ababababab
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: NATO on June 28, 2011, 06:08:15 AM
You know you've found a peach of a pic when no captions are needed - great avatar this week  agagagagag
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on June 28, 2011, 08:02:39 AM
You know you've found a peach of a pic when no captions are needed - great avatar this week  agagagagag

Do you want that with gieen pepper or with Wind of Europe?

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: NATO on July 02, 2011, 04:21:11 AM
I want it with some human relations  afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on July 03, 2011, 07:57:28 PM
Please be careful on #2, those sour beans do not iron think as much as you'd hope
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on July 04, 2011, 10:39:11 PM
This week's pic is here...like you. uuuuuuuuuu

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/YouareHere.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on July 04, 2011, 11:05:33 PM
Obviously this map is meant for EL and his clones
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Just Like Mr Benn on July 04, 2011, 11:49:38 PM
You can ask God for many things; just don't ask him for directions.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on July 05, 2011, 12:52:43 AM
You are everywhere and nowhere all at once. Wasn't that a Bob Dylan song?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Borkya on July 05, 2011, 01:19:20 AM
Ha ha! can I ask where this was taken?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on July 05, 2011, 01:53:45 AM
It was taken here, of course
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on July 05, 2011, 02:55:50 AM
Obviously this map is meant for EL and his clones

At last, clone rights have been extended to maps. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: adamsmith on July 05, 2011, 04:30:34 AM
if you can smell the washroom you are here, if you just parked your car you are here, if you are talking to a policeman you are here, but if you parked your car over there then you are here, if you parked your car on the sidewalk, then we don't know where you are but just follow your nose to the smell and you will be here.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on July 05, 2011, 06:16:43 AM
Finally! Proof that God exists, since it's a special map for a being that can truly be everywhere at once. yyyyyyyyyy

Then again, if you are everywhere at once, why would you need a map. bibibibibi
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on July 05, 2011, 09:26:53 AM
just because he's omnipresent and omniscient doesn't mean she can remember where he left his keys.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on July 05, 2011, 02:22:44 PM
At least we know this map wasn't written by any of my students, it didn't say;
 
"you is here"

or

"you were here tomorrow"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: piglet on July 05, 2011, 04:09:09 PM
Nah Dylan's one is "I'm not there".
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on July 05, 2011, 11:37:36 PM
Actually, from a quantum mechanics perspective, that map could well be correct... yyyyyyyyyy
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on July 06, 2011, 12:36:32 AM
from a quantum perspective, so could the students
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Cassnadra on July 06, 2011, 12:42:50 AM
 bkbkbkbkbk
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on July 06, 2011, 02:37:16 AM
Actually, from a quantum mechanics perspective, that map could well be correct... yyyyyyyyyy

Depends on which quantum issue you are dealing with.

If your location is unobserved and determined by a quantum phenomenon, then you could be anywhere - until you are observed.  That would make this a map of the locations of Schrodinger's cat.

If you are subject to Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle, we might know where you are, but not exactly when.

Ff you are experimenting with your new home made quantum-based teleportation device, you might end up being spread all over the map.  Of course, that would be just a little bit messy.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on July 07, 2011, 06:17:56 AM
Depends on which quantum issue you are dealing with.

Oh, doesn't it always? llllllllll




I can't take a shower without six or seven of those Higgs bosons jumping in with me. They're in my kitchen cupboard now, eating all me Mum's jam!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on July 07, 2011, 09:22:52 AM

I can't take a shower without six or seven of those Higgs bosons jumping in with me.


You too?  I thought it was just me with that issue. ahahahahah

That and I've got this nasty problem with neutrinos zipping right through my body without even asking permission.  I feel SOOOO violated. amamamamam
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on July 11, 2011, 11:30:48 AM
Time for a new picture, I've been here before



 ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Just Like Mr Benn on July 11, 2011, 09:59:28 PM
It's the age old question.

Why are we here?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on July 12, 2011, 02:57:40 AM
It's the age old question.

Why are we here?

At least we've solved the question of location.  No matter where you go, there you are.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on July 12, 2011, 03:53:05 AM
It's the age old question.

Why are we here?

Not exactly, more like;

Why are we here,
and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: piglet on July 12, 2011, 05:27:03 AM
DD you are really being very silly today  bibibibibi
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on July 12, 2011, 05:49:17 AM
I'm not being silly there, just here
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on July 12, 2011, 11:11:41 PM
Sorry I'm running late...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/naughtyspread.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cruisemonkey on July 12, 2011, 11:23:52 PM
Oooooh... me, a pool and twenty, beautiful, twenty-something Chinese girls. bfbfbfbfbf Would I be spreading myself to thin? 
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Cassnadra on July 13, 2011, 12:22:38 AM
Sorry I'm running late...

For the pool party? Waaheeey!  afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on July 13, 2011, 12:29:21 AM
Last one in isn't naughty!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on July 13, 2011, 04:50:13 AM
Cass, that was my joke! <lame follow-through> You can call me latefordinner, but not the pool party.
cruisemonk: better spread than dead.

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Cassnadra on July 13, 2011, 05:08:39 AM
Cass, that was my joke!

Got to get up pretty early in the morning (at least while I'm in another time zone) to get a lame joke in before me...
 ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on July 13, 2011, 06:00:10 AM
I have finally found Cassnadra's place
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on July 15, 2011, 04:47:30 AM
Swimming suits optional.  Condoms required. afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Cassnadra on July 15, 2011, 05:14:48 AM
I prefer the choc-hazelnut spread pool...

(I just saw what you wrote DD...  cheeky sod...:P )
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on July 15, 2011, 05:45:34 AM
Which way to Cassnadra's place the Naughty Choc-Hazelnut Pool? afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Cassnadra on July 15, 2011, 05:54:02 AM
 ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on July 15, 2011, 07:30:34 AM
I suppose this is where the expression "skinny-dip" becomes an oxymoron
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on July 15, 2011, 08:47:07 AM
I prefer the choc-hazelnut spread pool...

(I just saw what you wrote DD...  cheeky sod...:P )

Be careful what you say or the next time I see you, you just might get a swift kiss in the mouth



 :lickass:
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on July 15, 2011, 10:11:00 PM
Though moderated more loosely than most, this is in fact an on-topic area.
Why don't you two kids find a room or something? uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on July 16, 2011, 03:46:42 AM
As the sign says, we're just being naughty as we spread pool? What's the problem, You don't like chocolate spread on your naughty pool?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on July 17, 2011, 04:08:08 AM
Ohh, quit peeking through your fingers and live a little. So they found a pool to spread their naughtiness around in. Grab a fistful of chocolate and spread it on yer pool cue, you naughty boy. Maybe find someone naughty to help you
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on July 17, 2011, 04:31:12 AM
 ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on July 18, 2011, 04:53:06 AM
Is is where we all bet naughty actions and the winner gets to collect? mmmmmmmmmm
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on July 20, 2011, 05:29:42 PM
New unit!

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/massage_LT.jpg)

Do men in Wales have...you know...special problems ? mmmmmmmmmm
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cruisemonkey on July 20, 2011, 07:08:41 PM
If I was the Prince of Wales, I'd figure any sexual function obstacle could be overcome by simply putting a bag over Camilla's head (and perhaps one over my own as well - in case hers fell off).
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Cassnadra on July 21, 2011, 12:15:14 AM
I'll have the lot... and don't skimp on the pâté.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on July 21, 2011, 04:24:52 AM
 bkbkbkbkbk

Hollander lady style? mmmmmmmmmm Sounds suspiciously like Thai lady boy.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Cassnadra on July 21, 2011, 04:35:43 AM
Dutch lady boys are taller...
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on July 21, 2011, 08:18:23 AM
At last the trainers at Sea World now have a place to take their sexually dysfunctional whales for treatment.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on July 21, 2011, 09:13:57 AM
EL, you just reminded me of a terrirfic book titled The Lust Lizard of Melancholy Cove.
Well it's not a whale, but it does seek help for sexual dysfunction. (Not getting any qualifies as dysfunction, no?)
Swimming back to the, umm, wish list, I'm having trouble imagining a whale (or depressed sea-monster) swimming up to the side of the pool and saying to the woman in the starched white uniform, "What shall we have today?"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on July 21, 2011, 10:03:14 AM
Hollander Lady Style =?= Xaviera Hollander (aka the Happy Hooker) uuuuuuuuuu



Wale Sexual Function Obstacle aoaoaoaoao sent down 4 skin divers to circumcise :wtf:
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: piglet on July 21, 2011, 12:00:49 PM
Isn't muscovite a variety of duck?  mmmmmmmmmm
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on July 21, 2011, 03:58:43 PM
Quote
Isn't muscovite a variety of duck?
That's Muscovy, dear. agagagagag
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on July 22, 2011, 03:22:17 AM
Accounting for misspellings, we've got a place that provides help for whale sexual dysfunction and also offers the services of Russian "ducks" and Dutch Lady Boys.

Guess I'll take my chances with the whole body massage and a side order of Forecast Life just to find out what the hell that is.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cruisemonkey on July 23, 2011, 12:02:01 AM
Guess I'll take my chances with the whole body massage and a side order of Forecast Life just to find out what the hell that is.

Go for the 'Forecast Life' first... because I'm pretty sure he/she will predict there's a massage with a 'happy ending' in your future.  bjbjbjbjbj
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on July 26, 2011, 06:07:48 AM
Oh, my... kkkkkkkkkk

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/toilet-chinglish.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on July 26, 2011, 07:11:50 AM
No rush, don't push, there's room for everyone.
(Love to see this on the side of a bus near the door)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on July 26, 2011, 09:31:09 AM
Hey, if you gotta go, you gotta go.

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cruisemonkey on July 26, 2011, 06:12:16 PM
Hey, if you gotta go, you gotta go.

Squat's that you say?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Cassnadra on July 27, 2011, 12:03:25 AM
In that case I shall sitpede!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on July 27, 2011, 01:45:42 AM
It is squat it is
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: NATO on July 27, 2011, 04:57:29 AM
What a poo-nitive rule.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on July 27, 2011, 09:09:44 AM
Upon reading the sign, Comrade Deng thought, "Oh crap!"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on July 27, 2011, 09:01:22 PM
Last one in is a silly sausage!

Please do not wash your hair in the toilet!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on July 28, 2011, 04:45:26 AM
Public safety officials were forced to add warning signs against stampeding after numerous deaths and injuries occurred during the latest outbreak of diarrhea sweeping the province.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on August 02, 2011, 08:39:38 AM
Gimme two, extra fuzzy...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/beedogs.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on August 02, 2011, 12:37:46 PM
The mystery surrounding the disappearance of bees across the country has been solved.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: piglet on August 02, 2011, 01:03:11 PM
Can I have a wasp one instead?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on August 02, 2011, 08:37:45 PM
To Bee or not to Bee, that is the question!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cruisemonkey on August 03, 2011, 04:26:24 AM
They're not bad (but I hate picking the little wings out of my teeth afterward). I hear they're coming out with a Africanized bee dog soon that's 'killer delicious' - 'to die for'!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 04, 2011, 05:23:31 AM
(Tulsa) Local man arrested for tampering with restaurant sign. ahahahahah


Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on August 04, 2011, 06:16:31 AM
Quote
Local man arrested for tampering with restaurant sign
I doan kair whut thay say where yew cumfrum. In Tulsa, if they's premium bee-dawgs, they's NEW bee-dawgs! Nun o' thet thar Old-Bee Hawt-Dog Guar fer us!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 04, 2011, 11:12:32 AM
To Bee or not to Bee, that is the question!
Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The stings and arrows of outrageous fortune ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cruisemonkey on August 07, 2011, 11:59:55 AM
Another one of Bill's -

Look like the innocent flower,
But bee the serpent under it.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 07, 2011, 11:30:54 PM
1.99 New Premium Bee Hot Dogs

Make it a combo with French Flies and and refreshing glass of Roach-A-Cola for only one dollar more.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on August 13, 2011, 02:42:04 AM
Meanwhile, apologies for the long run on this one. I been ill. ananananan
I'll change it as we get into the weekend again...
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 13, 2011, 06:06:37 AM
Raoul's digestion got stung by one too many bee hot dogs.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on August 13, 2011, 02:06:07 PM
Aaand here 'tis at last...
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/trucktruck.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 14, 2011, 03:04:35 AM
Public truck orgies - the newest shamefully decadent western perversion sweeping the nation. kkkkkkkkkk
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on August 14, 2011, 04:12:58 AM
Sweet propinquity. A friend just sent me an email with pictures taken all over Asia of overcrowded and overloaded trains and motorcycles and such. (No baby in a bucket though) I can send this back to him.

EL: as the lonely little car pulled by the great, sweaty truck, it thought it heard someone mutter "wanker" under his breath.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 15, 2011, 12:46:22 AM
For the first six months after they are born, the mother truck carries her babies on her back.  After that, they are big enough to roll on their own.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: fullricebowl on August 15, 2011, 02:22:44 AM
Public truck orgies - the newest shamefully decadent western perversion sweeping the nation. kkkkkkkkkk


For the first six months after they are born, the mother truck carries her babies on her back.  After that, they are big enough to roll on their own.



 ahahahahah What a great way to start the day- Thanks for the laugh EL!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 15, 2011, 03:42:40 AM
At last!!!  Someone appreciates me around here. ababababab
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: dragonsaver on August 15, 2011, 07:28:04 AM
                                            EL



                      :respect:
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on August 15, 2011, 08:50:32 PM
Count me in there too EL. agagagagag bfbfbfbfbf ahahahahah. Who else could think of anything as funny about this "Monster cluster-F**k" of a truck. agagagagag

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 16, 2011, 04:18:34 AM
Thanks ladies!  Luv ya all!!!  akakakakak akakakakak akakakakak


After going purse shopping with his lovely wife one too many times, EL went truck shopping. ahahahahah

(But darling, they gave me a BIG discount for buying so many.)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Cassnadra on August 16, 2011, 09:59:34 AM
Oh so that's how monster trucks are conceived...
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on August 16, 2011, 02:07:00 PM
No, little jeep, the stork didn't find you under a cabbage. Your daddy and I went to a factory in Changhchun for our holiday and 9 months later
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 17, 2011, 01:32:46 AM
If you think this is bad, you should see the trucks coming from the Hunan ship yards. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on August 21, 2011, 08:36:11 AM
Oy vey... bibibibibi

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/chineseagogo.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: piglet on August 21, 2011, 03:09:52 PM
This is so heavenly that I don't want to spoil it with unnecessary verbiage  akakakakak
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on August 21, 2011, 04:38:25 PM
'Tis indeed a treasure. I especially like the "Zhong Guo A Ko Ko" in Chinese. ahahahahah
Wish I had that album...
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 22, 2011, 01:39:38 AM
Featuring Prince's hit song Party like it's 1949!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on August 22, 2011, 02:40:20 AM
Great. I go back to teaching and this comes out. Now all my students are going to ask me about ah-ko-ko style. "You did this when you were in uni?" "Yup, when we weren't out hunting dinosaurs" "Can you teach us?"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on August 22, 2011, 05:26:49 AM
Booker T and the Meng Jie's.  Green Lanterns.




(Bang Bang (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J6waBZrcnrM).)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on August 23, 2011, 10:14:01 AM
Uncle Bertie has some competition!  If I ever open a bar, this will be hung out front.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on August 23, 2011, 03:14:41 PM
Definitely. agagagagag

In nearly 8 years of running this dog's head, I've spent innumerable hours hunting down many hundreds of images for potential use as our cover photo.

But I'm not at all sure ANY of them can hold a candle to this little gem. bjbjbjbjbj
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 26, 2011, 01:53:51 AM
Show your revolutionary fervor and dance for a harmonious motherland! :candyraver:
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on August 30, 2011, 01:27:16 AM
Gee, I hate to take that last one down. ananananan
But, time marches on. Just take it and leave me alone. uuuuuuuuuu

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/badwords.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 30, 2011, 02:10:14 AM
Notice to all of our special girls.  The proper phrase is "Think of the super quality, the price is quite reasonable.", not "No money, no touch." afafafafaf

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 01, 2011, 03:12:07 AM
And now, the full conversation using the recommended words.

Welcome to our market. Can I help you?

Yes.  I'm looking for a condom.  How much is one?

What price are you willing to pay?

What's the difference between the cheap ones and the expensive ones?

The price depends on the quality.

OK.  Let me try this one on.  What do you think?

Wonderful, and it fits you perfectly!

It fits ok, but I'm not sure I like the style.  Here, how does this one look on me?

Looks as though it was made only for you.

I do like the style a lot.

You have good taste.  You have made a good choice.

It's a bit expensive.

Think of the super quality, the price is quite reasonable.

Oh, I see this style comes in different colors.  How does this one look on me?

The color and design goes well your shape.

I need to test it in action.  Can I try it out with you?

It's my pleasure to help you.

Wow!  Not only a good fit, but it's so comfortable during use.  I'll take it.

Welcome back again.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on September 05, 2011, 09:30:28 AM
Oh, my. Have the funs. uuuuuuuuuu

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/shitfire.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on September 05, 2011, 09:31:26 AM
"Moving to Sichuan Province Takes Some Adjustment."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Cassnadra on September 05, 2011, 10:26:26 AM
An homage to my first week back in China...
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: dragonsaver on September 05, 2011, 11:20:10 AM
Holy crap   aoaoaoaoao aoaoaoaoao aoaoaoaoao

La duzi extraordinare  bibibibibi
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 05, 2011, 01:31:48 PM
This week's avatar sponsored by Pepto Bismal. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on September 05, 2011, 08:24:53 PM
A Johnny Cash fan?....."Ring of fire" ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on September 05, 2011, 11:59:47 PM
Massage + ….. Extras - 250rmb
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: BrandeX on September 06, 2011, 10:47:10 AM
I don't know the specifics of this pic, but that's Haruhi and Ultraman - Japanese, not Chinese.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on September 06, 2011, 11:03:12 AM
What is the Matrix?  WHO CARES!  GIVE HER THE BLUE PILL!!   THE BLUUUUUUUUUUUUE!


*glub*
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 06, 2011, 03:07:50 PM
The X Men's latest recruit is universally feared by friend and foe alike.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on September 06, 2011, 04:56:07 PM
My good buddy, who has me out of a couple of jams, designed a superhero crew of Japanese schoolgirls.  One of them had the ability to light her farts with catastrophic results, and this line began with action figures to introduce the comic.

I desperately hope that this is his work; otherwise someone else has plagiarizes the dear man.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 07, 2011, 12:56:10 PM
La Brown Girl never achieved the same widespread popularity as her blue cousin. ahahahahah ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 09, 2011, 01:40:56 PM
After thousands of years of dreams and wishes, now anyone can fly under their own power.  It just takes the right combination of spicy Hunan and Sichuan dishes at dinner the night before.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on September 11, 2011, 04:07:30 AM
A rare serious one this week...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/911.jpg)

NOT joking about this one would be appreciated.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on September 18, 2011, 04:37:24 AM
There's some solace in routine...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/Super-Bikini-1.gif)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 19, 2011, 12:18:31 AM
Beijing is already looking at possible new events in its bid for the 2020 Olympics.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on September 19, 2011, 01:21:18 PM
Competition for college admissions in China is getting tougher.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 20, 2011, 06:22:26 AM
Quick-set concrete wrestling.  Two girls enter.  One girl leaves (maybe). ahahahahah

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on September 25, 2011, 09:06:22 AM
Fresh meat, courtesy of Da Bunny!

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/dozers.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on September 25, 2011, 09:07:54 AM
"In China, you gotta use whatever connections you got..."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: psd4fan on September 25, 2011, 12:32:46 PM
I've seen girls that have arses that would be considered "wide loads" but this is too much.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on September 25, 2011, 08:16:01 PM
My Dad said get him to the Church, no matter how you do it!  bfbfbfbfbf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: NATO on September 26, 2011, 06:07:50 AM
Recent developments have exposed new ways to get married for couples that really DIG each other.

Ahem.


 bjbjbjbjbj
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 27, 2011, 01:48:52 AM
Local officials didn't quite understand the directive to help couples build stronger marriages.


(DAMN DAMN DAMN!!!!  Why didn't I think of that for my wedding? ananananan)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on September 27, 2011, 08:45:23 AM

He was such a great catch that she just had to scoop him up.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 28, 2011, 01:57:31 AM
The wedding procession from the steamroller factory didn't go quite so well. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on September 28, 2011, 04:44:37 AM
Photo taken just before being placed upon the largest wedding cake in human history.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Crippler on September 28, 2011, 08:34:25 AM
"I thought the house would be built BEFORE we got home."

or, "There will be no nookie until you build the house."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 29, 2011, 03:38:20 AM
Photo taken just before being placed upon the largest wedding cake in human history.

Which was naturally called . . .

The Great Wedding Cake of China
cecececece
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 30, 2011, 06:42:34 AM
Ever wonder if a guy could literally be bulldozed into marriage? mmmmmmmmmm
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on October 02, 2011, 05:54:30 AM
This week's photo. Line 'em up, kids! bpbpbpbpbp

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/weird_asia_02.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: psd4fan on October 02, 2011, 06:51:47 AM
I think that's how the video I posted for members started. At least it did in my mind.  uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 02, 2011, 07:40:06 AM
With the exception of a couple of mutations, EL's latest cloning project was wildly successful. agagagagag
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: old34 on October 02, 2011, 12:24:49 PM
Edited slightly with Skitch.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Jedi Smurf on October 02, 2011, 02:05:01 PM
Zesty Pickles in the Smurf Village.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: xwarrior on October 02, 2011, 04:20:24 PM
Own up! Who tried to rip the skirts off the girls 2nd and 5th from the left?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: zero on October 03, 2011, 12:04:02 AM
I would do each and every one of them.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 03, 2011, 06:00:10 AM
I would do each and every one of them.

You can have the two big green ones.  I'll taking the matching ones wearing boots.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on October 03, 2011, 08:03:33 AM
ZAP! uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on October 03, 2011, 01:27:23 PM
Two government officials pose for a photo after "inspecting" the Shanzhai LV girls and products.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 04, 2011, 01:32:50 AM
LV Troops and their new alien overlords are now prepared seize total victory in the designer handbag war.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on October 07, 2011, 04:49:45 PM
The famous conjoined Zhang Dodecatuplets make their social debut.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on October 08, 2011, 03:31:53 PM
The new cloning process proved to have a slight, but enjoyable, glitch.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on October 09, 2011, 12:00:48 AM
When EL Enterprises merged with a European fashion house, few forsaw the dramatic effect that clone technology would have on the fashion business. However, the new line of Escaped Looney Futon wear is currently taking Guangdong like a tropical storm, and is expected to spread all over China next year.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on October 10, 2011, 03:08:27 AM
Wheeeeeee!

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/greatwaterslide.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on October 10, 2011, 03:11:48 AM
For those who like to deeply analyze all our cover photos: I think they used Photoshop. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on October 10, 2011, 03:16:56 AM
"The Great Waterslide of China was very effective at keeping out the Mongol hordes, who couldn't afford admission...not to mention the concessions."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 10, 2011, 03:48:47 AM
I'd like to introduce you all to my newest business venture.  I call it the Great WaterWall of China.
 axaxaxaxax axaxaxaxax axaxaxaxax axaxaxaxax
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on October 10, 2011, 04:12:19 AM

For those who like to deeply analyze all our cover photos: I think they used Photoshop. ahahahahah


It was a simple matter of changing the colour of the urine to blue.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on October 10, 2011, 04:29:18 AM
I can't top that one, Stil. bkbkbkbkbk
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 11, 2011, 05:05:09 AM

For those who like to deeply analyze all our cover photos: I think they used Photoshop. ahahahahah


It was a simple matter of changing the colour of the urine to blue.

Hmmmnn... makes me wonder what's up with the Yellow River. aoaoaoaoao
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on October 17, 2011, 05:58:13 AM
Ought to be lots of play in this one...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/makebaby.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 17, 2011, 07:03:00 AM
Damnit.  That's where all my wife's friends and family want us to go even though we've already got a perfect daughter.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on October 17, 2011, 08:06:40 PM
Come out, if you don't want to! :wtf: ahahahahah bfbfbfbfbf agagagagag
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Jedi Smurf on October 17, 2011, 08:16:38 PM
Come out, if you don't want to! :wtf: ahahahahah bfbfbfbfbf agagagagag

 ahahahahah ahahahahah ahahahahah

Along those same lines: Entrance in the rear for those who don't want to.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: xwarrior on October 17, 2011, 10:58:02 PM
Good one, Piglet!   agagagagag
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 18, 2011, 01:42:21 AM
Didn't somebody tell these people that bhbhbhbhbh isn't just for procreation anymore. afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on October 18, 2011, 02:12:28 AM
This shop makes most of its profit in DVD sales.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 18, 2011, 02:39:06 AM
This shop makes most of its profit in DVD sales.

and/or they rent guys out to single mom wannabees. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on October 18, 2011, 04:10:48 AM
Kevin Bloody Wilson: "Any mothers out there? Any women who want to be?"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on October 24, 2011, 11:46:37 AM
Achtung, Baby!

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/chinazi.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on October 24, 2011, 08:21:32 PM
Keep your chin up darling and just think about the money we are being paid to look like this!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 25, 2011, 12:48:12 AM
Join the 4th Reich today! hhhhhhhhhh

You get a cool uniform and also your very own persocom.

(http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/c/cd/Chobites_volume_1_cover.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: psd4fan on October 25, 2011, 04:46:20 AM
Ein Volk, Ein Reich, Ein Fraulein.  akakakakak
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: kitano on October 25, 2011, 04:55:47 AM
does anyone know the story behind that?

you'd have to be some sort of prick to dress up as a gestapo even in fun imo

I wonder what would happen if you walked around Nanjing dressed as a Japanese Imperial officer....
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 25, 2011, 05:36:17 AM
Vee haf vays of making you talk!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on October 25, 2011, 07:16:42 AM
Not too sure on the story, but these are apparently real wedding photos. aoaoaoaoao

See more at http://www.chinahush.com/2011/09/13/wedding-photos-in-nazi-uniform-criticized-by-netizens/ (http://www.chinahush.com/2011/09/13/wedding-photos-in-nazi-uniform-criticized-by-netizens/)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 25, 2011, 07:45:58 AM
So his explains the stormtroopers I saw during my wedding photo shoot in the bamboo grove next to the lake.  And to think all this time I thought I must have been hallucinating.  zzzzzzzzzz iiiiiiiiii
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: kitano on October 25, 2011, 11:26:05 AM
just wondering if it's a good idea to have some prick dressed in the uniform of one of the most evil types of soldiers of the past century as the front page image for this forum

to be honest I don't think it's funny....
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on October 25, 2011, 08:46:09 PM
kitano, I understand what you are saying. Who knows what motivates someone to dress like this on such a special day. bibibibibi At the link Raoul gave us, I see that most people did not like the guy wearing that uniform. One thing it did though, was to remind us what happened. Let us never forget!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: randyjac on October 25, 2011, 10:49:16 PM
It worked for the characters in "The Producers". Maybe some are too young to remember the 1968 film, but it was remade within the last few years, I think.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: ericthered on October 25, 2011, 11:53:44 PM
Well, I see the fun part but if I were a newbie who had just clicked on a link to the Saloon, all I would see would be the swastika and click away. That is indeed one if the most tasteless wedding pictures I have ever seen.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 26, 2011, 12:24:18 AM
That is indeed one if the most tasteless wedding pictures I have ever seen.

Why oh why didn't someone tell me that there was a contest for most tasteless Chinese wedding photos?  I could have tried so much harder. ananananan ananananan ananananan
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on October 26, 2011, 03:34:51 AM
EL:
Quote
Why oh why didn't someone tell me that there was a contest for most tasteless Chinese wedding photos?  I could have tried so much harder.

Seems to be the norm, don't it?
I thought the wedding photos of my wife and I riding the kiddie train were pretty juvenile too, but I went along with it because it was camp. This however I would have passed on.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 26, 2011, 09:24:14 AM
EL:
Quote
Why oh why didn't someone tell me that there was a contest for most tasteless Chinese wedding photos?  I could have tried so much harder.

Seems to be the norm, don't it?
I thought the wedding photos of my wife and I riding the kiddie train were pretty juvenile too, but I went along with it because it was camp. This however I would have passed on.

I'm sure if we tried really hard, we could have come up with something even more tasteless. agagagagag
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: kitano on October 26, 2011, 10:00:32 AM
I wonder if they'd let you dress as Hirohito and his wife?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cruisemonkey on October 26, 2011, 03:38:45 PM
If the couple were Korean, they'd be having the reception at the local, 'Nazi Bar'.

My Korean middle school students (boys) would pull threads out of their school uniform jackets to 'make' swastika patterns on the back. The K teachers saw nothing wrong with it.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on October 26, 2011, 11:25:51 PM
If the couple were Korean, they'd be having the reception at the local, 'Nazi Bar'.

My Korean middle school students (boys) would pull threads out of their school uniform jackets to 'make' swastika patterns on the back. The K teachers saw nothing wrong with it.

To be fair to the Korean teachers; swastikas are a lot older than Nazi Germany. They are a symbol of good luck in India. i see them carved into school desks here sometimes. The teachers (and students) don't have a western sensibility toward the symbol.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Swastika

Of course the guy in the photo in wearing a Nazi uniform.

To be fair to you. I have no idea what a Nazi bar in Korea is.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cruisemonkey on October 27, 2011, 12:08:07 AM
If the couple were Korean, they'd be having the reception at the local, 'Nazi Bar'.

My Korean middle school students (boys) would pull threads out of their school uniform jackets to 'make' swastika patterns on the back. The K teachers saw nothing wrong with it.

To be fair to the Korean teachers; swastikas are a lot older than Nazi Germany. They are a symbol of good luck in India. i see them carved into school desks here sometimes. The teachers (and students) don't have a western sensibility toward the symbol.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Swastika

Of course the guy in the photo in wearing a Nazi uniform.

To be fair to you. I have no idea what a Nazi bar in Korea is.

The Buddhist swastika faces the opposite way to the Nazi swastika (they're in no way related).

There are several 'Nazi Bars' in the big cities in Korea.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 27, 2011, 03:02:40 AM
If the couple were Korean, they'd be having the reception at the local, 'Nazi Bar'.

My Korean middle school students (boys) would pull threads out of their school uniform jackets to 'make' swastika patterns on the back. The K teachers saw nothing wrong with it.

It might be worth reminding our Korean and Chinese friends exactly who was allied with the Japanese during The Anti-Japanese War.


And, back to possible captions for this one:

Just wait until tonight darling and I'll show you how Blitzkrieg works.

Next time I'll play Himmler.  Do they have that dress in my size?

Today a hot cosplay girl.  Tomorrow, the world!


Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on October 27, 2011, 03:54:02 AM
"Noe, khunney, I luff only jew."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 27, 2011, 04:01:42 AM
Darling, when I told you I wanted you to wear a uniform in the wedding photos, this wasn't what I had in mind. kkkkkkkkkk
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on October 27, 2011, 05:30:14 AM
Quote
The Buddhist swastika faces the opposite way to the Nazi swastika (they're in no way related).

Yeah, The Hindu swastika is the same way though. My fathers family was Hindu. They were all over the house and clothes in my Grandmothers house in Trinidad. She was not a Nazi nor supported them.

Even still, pulling on some threads to for a symbol on your clothes regardless is not nearly the same as wearing a Nazi uni for your freaking wedding photos.

My guess is that it just looks sharp to him and any actual meaning is irrelevant.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 27, 2011, 06:07:22 AM
It's not my fault honey.  I asked the idiots at the wedding studio for a Naxi outfit. bibibibibi
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: kitano on October 27, 2011, 06:39:24 AM
The guy in the picture looks western, a sick joke I guess.

There used to be one Hitler Bar in Busan, it was just a really normal bar with Nazi regalia, I remember there was a guy opened a Hitler themed curry house in Mumbai a few years ago. You could argue that turning it into kitsch disarms it? The Nazi's were deliberately incredibly stylish and well dressed etc

I suppose Kim Jong Il tends to be treated as a sort of kitsch figure of fun by the west a lot of the time rather than a murderous dictator....
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 27, 2011, 07:31:07 AM
The guy in the picture looks western, a sick joke I guess.

Check the link posted on the previous page.  It shows more pics and he looks Chinese.


And, getting back to making fun of someone who deserves it much more than most Pic of the Week subjects:

Colonel Hogan's men were experts at using disguises to fool the Germans.  ahahahahah


Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on October 27, 2011, 02:55:10 PM
Okay, Eva.  Let's go hunker in the bunker.  cbcbcbcbcb hhhhhhhhhh
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 27, 2011, 11:29:43 PM
It doesn't matter if you're a walking, talking, sex doll computer or a crazed bigot intent on genocide.  Love knows no bounds, even for the inhuman types among us.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on October 28, 2011, 03:10:34 AM
Your love may know no bounds, but i can show it a thing or two about bonds
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 29, 2011, 02:44:26 AM
Darling, how far would you go to prove your love for me?
Honey, I'd do whatever you ask to prove my love for you.
Really?  Would you wear anything I ask for the wedding photos?  Even if other people didn't like it?
Of course, dear.  Anything to make you happy.
Have I ever mentioned that I always had a secret fantasy to be kissed by a guy in a Nazi uniform?
What?!?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: kitano on October 29, 2011, 03:33:07 AM
I would do anything for you baby

Would you start a war with the other rich countries and murder millions of your own people senselessly?

Let me just call Japan......
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 30, 2011, 02:44:11 AM
For our honeymoon, let's invade Poland.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on November 07, 2011, 01:36:04 AM
How our Beijing tour ended up in Shijiazhuang...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/businfo.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 07, 2011, 05:37:05 AM
980 Express, . . . bus station.  Ooops, I took the 980 Express train and now I don't know what province I'm in. ananananan
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: old34 on November 07, 2011, 06:26:50 AM
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/businfo.jpg)

Maybe I've been here too long and become accustomed to it, but these directions are entirely coherent to me.

Or maybe it's just that I have been to Miyun before (nice place to visit, too).
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: fullricebowl on November 07, 2011, 07:05:01 AM

[/quote]
Maybe I've been here too long and become accustomed to it, but these directions are entirely coherent to me.

Hehe, I had the same feeling! I'm really not familiar with Nanshan- but are these supposed to be directions from Dongzhimen in Beijing to Nanshan (Shenzhen)? Because that would certainly be a deal for 14rmb :P
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on November 07, 2011, 09:39:05 AM

Maybe I've been here too long and become accustomed to it, but these directions are entirely coherent to me.


These would be the best directions I ever got.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on November 07, 2011, 02:06:07 PM
My first thought was "A ski resort in Shenzhen? Are they talking about that indoor ski simulation?"

These would be good directions in New Jersey.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 14, 2011, 04:28:50 AM
Looks like El Hefe forgot to put a copy of the pic here.

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/crazyenglish.jpg)

Oddly enough, China-Matt's previous post seems like it might almost work.

Quote
"A ski resort in Shenzhen? Are they talking about that indoor ski simulation?"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on November 14, 2011, 09:20:13 AM

Duck...duck...GOOSE!! uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 14, 2011, 10:10:06 AM
Raoul's new methods of inspecting barfly candidates are getting more and more worrisome. aqaqaqaqaq
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Borkya on November 14, 2011, 12:15:31 PM
Well, a least the ladies are finally getting a little eye candy.  aoaoaoaoao
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: zero on November 14, 2011, 02:10:02 PM
The New China Center for Digestive Health. We get your bowels moving again by all-natural means!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on November 14, 2011, 03:07:09 PM
NO, you don't get the red fez until after you dance
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on November 14, 2011, 05:33:44 PM
Many ideas for enacting the Olympic circles for the opening ceremonies were auditioned.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on November 14, 2011, 08:40:22 PM
The Company is teaching its new managers to work together; the consequences of not doing so are rather horrifying to contemplate. aoaoaoaoao
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on November 14, 2011, 11:43:22 PM
What happened old34's to the Penn St caption. Hilarious!

Was it too soon?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 14, 2011, 11:52:24 PM
Now that all of you are comfortable, wait here and I'll bring a couple buckets of lube.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 15, 2011, 02:41:11 AM
I would do each and every one of them.

Sometimes, taking things out of context can be fun. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 15, 2011, 11:18:36 PM
You've all passed the tests.  Granny Mae will be here for you soon.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on November 16, 2011, 09:04:02 PM
You've all passed the tests.  Granny Mae will be here for you soon.


You will then learn what foreigners mean when they talk about Cougars. aoaoaoaoao uuuuuuuuuu apapapapap bgbgbgbgbg oooooooooo :candyraver: :dancemj:
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on November 17, 2011, 08:58:35 AM
The winners will begin their Special Training to be come Cabana Boys for the LL afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: dragonsaver on November 17, 2011, 10:09:09 AM
AMonk,those lads are WAY too skinny to be good Cabana Boys.  aoaoaoaoao  kkkkkkkkkk afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 17, 2011, 12:07:30 PM
Let's see.  That's 2 of you turned on, 6 not turned on and the rest undecided.  I need more data.  Let's make the diameter of the circle one meter smaller and try again.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on November 17, 2011, 02:14:56 PM
Poor grammar as usual. The instructions said a circle jerk not a circle of jerks.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: zero on November 17, 2011, 08:27:15 PM
I would do each and every one of them.

Sometimes, taking things out of context can be fun. ahahahahah


You're projecting.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 18, 2011, 01:38:18 AM
I would do each and every one of them.

Sometimes, taking things out of context can be fun. ahahahahah


You're projecting.

Methinks he doth protest too much. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on November 18, 2011, 09:16:27 AM
AMonk,those lads are WAY too skinny to be good Cabana Boys.  aoaoaoaoao  kkkkkkkkkk afafafafaf

That's why they would need "Special" training uuuuuuuuuu afafafafaf ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: dragonsaver on November 19, 2011, 06:06:11 PM
 bkbkbkbkbk axaxaxaxax
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on November 21, 2011, 02:06:42 PM
Here it is, already.
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/pullmyfinger.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: old34 on November 21, 2011, 02:28:52 PM
"I'm Sorry, But I Respectfully Decline To 'Pully Fingah'."
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/pullmyfinger.jpg)

"Either of them," he smirked.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: zero on November 22, 2011, 12:27:24 AM
Wazzuuuuuuuuup ...
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 22, 2011, 12:57:54 AM
Pay off those debts now or I'll repossess your whole country.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on November 22, 2011, 05:37:17 AM
"Hey, I know you! Toothpaste Guy! I love that stuff!"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on November 22, 2011, 10:42:18 AM
"Wanna teach English?'
"No."
"No qualification necessary."
"Thanks."
"Just tell them your culture."
"Listen, you wizened little--doh! Sorry, I mean honorable, ummm... "
"You gotta girlfriend?"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on November 22, 2011, 11:15:22 AM
You don't need to be blond and fair skinned to teach in China. But don't expect to be paid as much as the blond dropout. He has an expensive baijiu habit and an even more expensive girlfrined to take care of. We're sensitive to those kinds of needs here.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on November 23, 2011, 08:37:44 AM
"Hey, I know you! Toothpaste Guy! I love that stuff!"

bkbkbkbkbk (with a bit of a wince among the laughter...)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 24, 2011, 02:26:36 AM
Your wife almost cute as mine.  Wanna have swap party?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on November 28, 2011, 08:47:06 AM
Oh, my. Ohhhh, my.....

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/lostintranslation.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 28, 2011, 09:29:56 AM
Where do I sigh up? afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: MK on November 28, 2011, 10:02:06 AM
11/25....awwwww...I've missed it already!  When's the next one?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on November 28, 2011, 12:08:56 PM
Man that was great!. Finger lickin' good.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on November 28, 2011, 02:25:12 PM
You'll notice, MK, that he waited until after it was over to post the notice. So that we didn't have a chance. He wanted all the fun to himself, methinks.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on December 05, 2011, 09:28:00 AM
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/hotdogaids.jpg)

"Many In China Are Still Confused By The Term "Wiener"..."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on December 05, 2011, 09:58:31 AM
You know where to put it, don't you?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on December 05, 2011, 11:36:31 AM
Umm, is that one real, Stil? Really?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on December 05, 2011, 02:37:31 PM
I didn't take the pic. I don't understand the Chinese actually. It says hot dog but I have no idea what the meaning of 多拿滋 duo na zi is here. The 滋 zi character is used in 艾滋病 aizibing which is AIDS. Must have been machine translated.

Maybe someone with better Chinese can tells what that's supposed to mean.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: zero on December 05, 2011, 08:31:24 PM
I believe it is a term for doughnut.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on December 06, 2011, 12:02:36 AM
I believe it is a term for doughnut.

The best policy always wrap your hotdog before shoving it into a donut. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on December 06, 2011, 03:16:58 AM
In this case I believe the Chinese means condiments or toppings. Y'know; ketsup, relish and such. But oh man what a mistranslation! You're probably right, Stil. Most likely a machine/internet translation. To err is human, but to really mess up you need a computer.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on December 06, 2011, 04:28:23 AM
The Hot Dog Plague (aka the Wiener Death) came on the world scene in late 2016.  By 2017, it killed more people worldwide than AIDS.  As the epidemic intensified,  the Hot Dog Plague ended up killing more than 1/3 of the world population by 2025.

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: MK on December 06, 2011, 04:47:04 AM
Yeah duonazi seems to be donuts (https://www.google.com/search?hl=en&cp=3&gs_id=3&xhr=t&q=%E5%A4%9A%E6%8B%BF%E6%BB%8B&tok=TxXihQyzajz2kLxRj-97Qg&safe=off&gs_sm=&gs_upl=&bav=on.2,or.r_gc.r_pw.r_cp.,cf.osb&biw=1280&bih=605&um=1&ie=UTF-8&tbm=isch&source=og&sa=N&tab=wi&ei=KJzdTryyAu7JmQWxl6WYBQ).

The concept of a 'hot-dog donut' is not as alarming as getting a potentially fatal disease with your meal...but it's still pretty weird.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: tomhume89 on December 06, 2011, 07:12:37 AM
Hahaha, trying to stifle laughs in my office...
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on December 06, 2011, 09:29:15 AM
Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens
Hot dogs and AIDS and warm woolen mittens
Brown paper packages tied up with strings
These are a few of my favorite things

-Joolie Andews
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: MK on December 06, 2011, 11:53:44 AM
Ingredients at the bottom of pic - Contains flour, cream, sugar...AND AIDS!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on December 06, 2011, 06:31:55 PM
Hot Dogs.  We're more than just beaks and feet!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on December 07, 2011, 02:41:13 AM
Our new ingredient will give you a hotdog you'll remember for the rest of your life. qqqqqqqqqq
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: old34 on December 07, 2011, 01:27:12 PM
Yeah duonazi seems to be donuts (https://www.google.com/search?hl=en&cp=3&gs_id=3&xhr=t&q=%E5%A4%9A%E6%8B%BF%E6%BB%8B&tok=TxXihQyzajz2kLxRj-97Qg&safe=off&gs_sm=&gs_upl=&bav=on.2,or.r_gc.r_pw.r_cp.,cf.osb&biw=1280&bih=605&um=1&ie=UTF-8&tbm=isch&source=og&sa=N&tab=wi&ei=KJzdTryyAu7JmQWxl6WYBQ).

I was able to have fun with this one in class this week. I showed them the picture (disconnected from our website). They all gasped and then laughed. Then I showed them MK's link (above) googling 多拿滋 resulting in images of donuts. The penny dropped for them - Donuts had been transliterated into DuoNaZi by the Chinese language authority. Then I showed them Google Translate of 多拿滋 which GOOGLE renders as "Take AIDS more." 
http://translate.google.com.hk/?hl=en&cp=3&gs_id=3&xhr=t&q=多拿滋&tok=TxXihQyzajz2kLxRj-97Qg&safe=off&gs_sm=&gs_upl=&bav=on.2,or.r_gc.r_pw.r_cp.,cf.osb&biw=1280&bih=605&um=1&ie=UTF-8&sa=N&tab=iT (http://translate.google.com.hk/?hl=en&cp=3&gs_id=3&xhr=t&q=多拿滋&tok=TxXihQyzajz2kLxRj-97Qg&safe=off&gs_sm=&gs_upl=&bav=on.2,or.r_gc.r_pw.r_cp.,cf.osb&biw=1280&bih=605&um=1&ie=UTF-8&sa=N&tab=iT)

Voila! AIDS!

We all agreed to blame both the Chinese language authority and Google.

1. The Chinese translation authority for their poor choice in transliteration characters: why not just this zi 字 rather than this zi 滋? Unless they were intentionally trying to frighten their own away from "donuts" which have become quite a popular small franchise business here in the last couple of years.

2. Google for really bad literal translation. They need to up their Translation game.

This is reminiscent of the old Jin Shan Zi Bao translation software which used to translate  干 gan (dried) as "F***" resulting in many funny translations in grocery stores of the Dried Fruits and Dried Vegetable sections.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: MK on December 07, 2011, 11:01:06 PM
3. Chinese approach to 'Western' food generally, e.g. trying to put a hot dog in a donut....honestly it's like something Homer Simpson would dream up...
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: zero on December 07, 2011, 11:32:00 PM
The Chinese approach to Western foods is the same as for Western people. Fine to have around sometimes, but it isn't something you'd take seriously. You stick strictly to native Chinese items for your main course. Western elements, even perfectly serious ones like, say, bread, are OK for a diversion now and then. Just add plenty of sugar to cover up that nasty Western taste. Remind anyone of their workplace? Oh, putting a hot dog in a doughnut is completely ridiculous? It's OK, it's not like we defiled hongshao qiezi. That would be offensive.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: old34 on December 07, 2011, 11:34:29 PM
3. Chinese approach to 'Western' food generally, e.g. trying to put a hot dog in a donut....honestly it's like something Homer Simpson would dream up...

I dunno, it's just another form of "pig-in-a-blanket."

cf. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pigs_in_a_blanket (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pigs_in_a_blanket)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on December 08, 2011, 02:22:13 AM
Hot dog in a donut, pig in a blanket, or whatever else you call it, just make sure to safely wrap up that wiener before using it. afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: MK on December 08, 2011, 12:18:57 PM
Quote
I dunno, it's just another form of "pig-in-a-blanket."

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pigs_in_a_blanket

Quote
In the United States, the term "pigs in a blanket" ... refers to hot dogs, Vienna sausages, or breakfast/link sausages wrapped in biscuit dough, pancake, or croissant dough, and baked.

OK, I thought the Scottish diet was unhealthy...

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on December 12, 2011, 03:27:15 AM
Oh, no...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/Everything-Is-Made-In-China-1785.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on December 12, 2011, 04:34:31 AM
 ahahahahah ahahahahah Yer gets wot yer pays fer!!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: dragonsaver on December 12, 2011, 01:16:02 PM
I love this week's avatar.  It definitely explains some of the things happening in USAnia  ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on December 12, 2011, 02:43:09 PM
Tomorrow I'm going to begin exporting American-made Socialism with Chinese Characteristics. Oh wait, Walmart already did that.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on December 13, 2011, 03:22:32 AM
Freedom and Liberty - now on sale for 30% off at your local WalMart.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on January 01, 2012, 06:24:25 AM
looks like El Hefe was enjoying the holiday a little to much to post the new Pic of the Week in this thread.

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/2012.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on January 01, 2012, 07:19:33 AM
Excellent guess, but basically I wasn't putting the holiday specials in here...?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on January 02, 2012, 02:47:28 AM
Excellent guess, but basically I wasn't putting the holiday specials in here...?

I reject your reality and substitute my own. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on January 08, 2012, 09:59:05 AM
Words fail me...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/wife_pie.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on January 08, 2012, 01:23:41 PM
Can be quite tasty as long as it's not too old. Usually sweet.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on January 08, 2012, 11:38:24 PM
Often served with Sharp Tongue and Cold Shoulder.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Nolefan on January 09, 2012, 05:22:29 AM
use in moderation...
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on January 09, 2012, 05:51:45 AM
The Soylent Corporation is proud to introduce the first of a new line of customized products. uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Fozzwaldus on January 09, 2012, 08:14:09 AM
Often served with Sharp Tongue and Cold Shoulder.

 ahahahahah ahahahahah ahahahahah ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: NATO on January 09, 2012, 04:08:37 PM
Does it come with cream?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on January 10, 2012, 01:29:26 AM
I'm hungry.  Can I have more than one?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on January 10, 2012, 02:01:14 AM
Whose?
I swear, I didn't know she was married.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: zero on January 10, 2012, 02:34:53 PM
Not a bad dish, but if there's anything else on the menu, I always try that first.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on January 10, 2012, 05:29:00 PM
Ah...you mean "the other wife meat"... bpbpbpbpbp
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on January 10, 2012, 08:57:22 PM
I wonder if Little Jack Horner would stick his thumb in that one? ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on January 10, 2012, 09:55:42 PM
Quote
I wonder if Little Jack Horner would stick his thumb in that one?
Or possibly several fingers?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on January 11, 2012, 03:16:28 AM
Quote
I wonder if Little Jack Horner would stick his thumb in that one?
Or possibly several fingers?

Or fisted it. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: zero on January 11, 2012, 03:20:55 AM
Or his penis?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on January 11, 2012, 04:22:56 AM
Quote
Or his penis?
Shades of Portnoy!! ahahahahah ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on January 11, 2012, 06:33:00 AM
Finger-lickin' good!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: psd4fan on January 12, 2012, 07:40:36 AM
Wish I had the Monkey Kings ability to change the size and number of certain things.  afafafafaf uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on January 12, 2012, 01:56:34 PM
Wifey caught me laughing my ass off and said that's an incorrect translation.  It should read "Wife Cake".

Either way, I think I'll eat a piece after dinner. afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cruisemonkey on January 15, 2012, 07:03:51 PM
Wifey caught me laughing my ass off and said that's an incorrect translation.  It should read "Wife Cake".

Either way, I think I'll eat a piece after dinner. afafafafaf


So... my parents were wrong when they told me I can't have my cake and eat it too?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on January 16, 2012, 03:25:40 AM
Oh, DO try and have fun...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/belegal.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on January 16, 2012, 03:27:59 AM
Prison, a pain in the ass in more ways than one. aqaqaqaqaq
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on January 16, 2012, 08:34:48 AM
 bibibibibi
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: psd4fan on January 16, 2012, 08:39:06 AM
With apologies to John Denver, "Sunshine up my arsehole makes me happy, sunshine up my arsehole make me gay"  uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: KeyserSoze on January 16, 2012, 09:38:25 AM
Every time you go to prison, a daisy turns into a sunflower.
 bpbpbpbpbp
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: zero on January 16, 2012, 03:05:32 PM
I don't have an alternate heading, but I have to be honest: Those flowers remind me of anuses.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: BrandeX on January 16, 2012, 04:19:28 PM
"harps", not "carps" which are fish.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on January 16, 2012, 05:20:48 PM
"Carp" are fish......"carps" is nagging! ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on January 16, 2012, 09:01:01 PM
Stop the presses; for once Gerge is right. Look the word up. uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cruisemonkey on January 16, 2012, 11:56:39 PM
It's not just prison - I paid $327 dollars to be irradiated and have a guy stick his finger in my ass  aoaoaoaoao during the medical required for my effin' Working Permit and LoI (so I can apply for my Z visa)! I was 'violated' in more ways than one...
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on January 17, 2012, 01:12:59 AM
It's not just prison - I paid $327 dollars to be irradiated and have a guy stick his finger in my ass 

Funny how he did that and also had a hand on each of your shoulders. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Fozzwaldus on January 17, 2012, 01:17:19 PM
I don't have an alternate heading, but I have to be honest: Those flowers remind me of anuses.

 ahahahahah ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: NATO on January 17, 2012, 01:34:52 PM
I don't have an alternate heading, but I have to be honest: Those flowers remind me of anuses.

YOUR SICK.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on January 17, 2012, 01:40:40 PM
YOU'RE llllllllll llllllllll
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on January 17, 2012, 03:07:11 PM
or maybe your sick <+ missing noun>
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: fox on January 17, 2012, 03:44:13 PM
i will never enjoy sunflowers again  llllllllll
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on January 18, 2012, 01:54:18 AM
He was a shy boy, like a sweet daisy.  Then, he ran afoul of the visa laws.  Prison traumatizes most people, but not in this case.  Instead, he blossomed into a lovely sunflower and became the most popular boy in his cell block.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: NATO on January 18, 2012, 06:44:31 AM
YOU'RE llllllllll llllllllll

No I'm not! YOU'RE.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on January 19, 2012, 03:56:37 AM
i will never enjoy sunflowers again  llllllllll

I wonder if there's some symbolism in those Van Gogh paintings. mmmmmmmmmm
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: zero on January 19, 2012, 03:06:34 PM
Yes, EL. The flowers represent anuses that have been subjected to varying degrees of sexual activity.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on January 19, 2012, 07:55:05 PM
Quote
Yes, EL. The flowers represent anuses that have been subjected to varying degrees of sexual activity.
seriously? mmmmmmmmmm
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on January 20, 2012, 02:10:34 AM
Quote
Yes, EL. The flowers represent anuses that have been subjected to varying degrees of sexual activity.
seriously? mmmmmmmmmm

Zero is our resident expert on the subject of sunflower symbolism.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: old34 on January 20, 2012, 03:21:47 PM
In support of sunflowers:

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: zero on January 20, 2012, 03:58:11 PM
I see a beautiful young Asian woman -- surrounded by anuses.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on January 21, 2012, 02:14:07 AM
I see a beautiful young Asian woman -- surrounded by anuses.

And how does that make you feel?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: zero on January 21, 2012, 03:17:46 AM
Strongly aroused.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on January 23, 2012, 05:21:53 AM
Glad we got a new one up afore Zero asploded. uuuuuuuuuu

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/fuckprice2.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on January 24, 2012, 02:00:05 AM
Have issues with premature ejaculation?  If so, make sure to use the express lane. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on February 06, 2012, 11:00:14 AM
The Smoking Lamp is now lit...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/assmeat.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on February 07, 2012, 12:42:14 AM
When I said I wanted a piece of ass, I had something else in mind. afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Nolefan on February 07, 2012, 05:21:23 AM
you can have your ass and eat it too  uuuuuuuuuu uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on February 07, 2012, 06:25:51 AM
I always thought "having your ass shredded" and "having your ass handed to you on a plate" were just figures of speech.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on February 13, 2012, 12:22:09 AM
Oooh! New stuff!

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/Funny-Chinese-School-Teachers-Poster.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: zero on February 13, 2012, 12:49:22 AM
I would make hot, passionate love to that teacher!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: BrandeX on February 13, 2012, 01:48:19 AM
Obvious Japanese are obvious.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on February 13, 2012, 03:24:14 AM
How badly do I have to misbehave in class before she'd lay me across her knees, pull down my pants, and spank me?
 cbcbcbcbcb
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Jedi Smurf on February 13, 2012, 03:34:16 AM
"With the arrival of the new schoolteacher, the boys found they had no problems keeping their pencils sharp."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: zero on February 13, 2012, 04:10:54 AM
How badly do I have to misbehave in class before she'd lay me across her knees, pull down my pants, and spank me?
 cbcbcbcbcb

Even beyond that, how bad do I have to be to get a reacharound?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on February 13, 2012, 06:05:15 AM
Chinese school teachers-
"ruggedly ignoring Japanese overtures since 1937"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cruisemonkey on February 13, 2012, 06:57:08 AM
He's NOT looking at the paper on his desk (I wouldn't be either).  afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on February 13, 2012, 08:12:31 AM
What desk?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on February 13, 2012, 08:14:40 PM
I knew it was too good to be true; the boy only has eyes for his book. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on February 14, 2012, 12:23:03 AM
He wondered how his new classmate managed to enroll in an all boys school.  Later, he found out that she was from Thailand.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on February 15, 2012, 05:44:24 PM
A great way to keep abreast of your subjects.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: zero on February 15, 2012, 05:53:35 PM
Honestly, have you ever seen  more attractive specimen? Just makes you want t put your hands all over that hot body, eh, EL? And that girl is not bad looking, either.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on February 16, 2012, 03:42:14 AM
Honestly, have you ever seen  more attractive specimen? Just makes you want t put your hands all over that hot body, eh, EL? And that girl is not bad looking, either.

Shhhh... we're not supposed to talk about those "special" things we do with other guys in public. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on February 20, 2012, 05:27:07 AM
Shhhh... we're not supposed to talk about those "special" things we do with other guys in public.

Oh, it's not like we don't all already know. uuuuuuuuuu

Meanwhile...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/gradesin.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cruisemonkey on February 20, 2012, 06:30:08 AM
Perhaps if you: ever attended a class; turned in any work; or, actually sat an exam, you'd get more than 60%. ::)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: becster79 on February 20, 2012, 07:00:01 AM
Nothing but *LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL* @ the pic!

Brilliant!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on February 20, 2012, 10:56:39 AM
New employees at the Anhui hotdog factory react when told the grim truth that hot dogs aren't made of dog meat.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: NATO on February 20, 2012, 11:33:07 AM
Preliminary tests of using Chinese pop music to torture soldiers have showed promising signs.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: NATO on February 20, 2012, 11:35:06 AM
The old hairgel for glue switcharoo went down a treat this year.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: NATO on February 20, 2012, 11:40:40 AM
That's right lads - Bambi's mother dies.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on February 20, 2012, 11:47:52 AM
ETR wants us to read how many books for literature class? aoaoaoaoao aoaoaoaoao aoaoaoaoao
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on February 20, 2012, 11:48:34 AM
Mass auditions for bit parts in "Scary Movie - The China Version" were a resounding success aoaoaoaoao
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on February 20, 2012, 01:23:28 PM
ETR wants us to read any books for literature class?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on February 20, 2012, 02:45:34 PM
The People's Liberation Army Marching Band and Modern Art Troupe of Anhui perform their new Socialist Literalist piece tentatively titled Birth of a Nation.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on February 20, 2012, 08:13:11 PM
My class' reaction to the corrections on their latest essay.  llllllllll
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on February 21, 2012, 12:48:25 AM
Soylent Black and White is made out of Pandas!  IT'S PANDAS!  NOOOOO!!!! aoaoaoaoao
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: KeyserSoze on February 21, 2012, 11:24:59 AM
The class was more than a little surprised by the fact that there is no 'r' in 'usually'.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on February 21, 2012, 01:57:01 PM
EL, discussing the previous avatar:
Quote
Shhhh... we're not supposed to talk about those "special" things we do with other guys in public.
Hmmm, "don't ask, don't tell" as the saloon's motto? Talk about a caption in search of a picture. And now this week's picture
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: zero on February 21, 2012, 03:58:21 PM
Just because a guy occasionally does a few vile deeds with strangers in a public bathroom stall doesn't make him gay, does it?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on February 21, 2012, 08:17:50 PM
Depends on which public bathroom he's in. uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on February 22, 2012, 02:40:00 AM
I would do each and every one of them.

Zero's out of context quote strikes again! ahahahahah

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on February 22, 2012, 08:26:51 AM
Human Centipede 3: the "before" picture.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on February 22, 2012, 08:16:27 PM
I would do each and every one of them.

Zero's out of context quote strikes again! ahahahahah

So that accounts for the looks on their faces! uuuuuuuuuu ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on February 23, 2012, 12:14:11 AM
We're sorry guys.  Granny Mae has cancelled her striptease act. ananananan
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on February 23, 2012, 09:15:29 AM
Audiences were very surprised by Zero's new solo dance routine called Watch me use this set of cucumbers to turn my cute little daisy into a big beautiful sunflower.

 aaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaa

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on February 28, 2012, 12:29:32 AM
Et voila...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/mindcrotch.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on February 28, 2012, 01:55:15 AM
I already knew my mind was in my crotch.  You don't have to make a sign about it. asasasasas
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cruisemonkey on February 28, 2012, 11:32:26 AM
I already knew my mind was in my crotch.  You don't have to make a sign about it. asasasasas

Agreed - my mind is in my crotch and crotches are always on my mind.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Cassnadra on February 29, 2012, 01:12:25 AM
Oh gawd I've been here for 6 months now.  My crotch minds.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on February 29, 2012, 06:37:58 AM
Oh gawd I've been here for 6 months now.  My crotch minds.

My crotch minds and my mind is crotchety.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Cassnadra on February 29, 2012, 07:48:26 AM
I've heard that about you...
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: NATO on February 29, 2012, 01:03:19 PM
Mind crotch, dickhead.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 01, 2012, 06:22:48 AM
A mind is a terrible thing to waste and a crotch is a terrible thing to mind. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 02, 2012, 03:22:46 AM
My mind to your crotch
My desires to your desires


 - Vulcan Crotch Melding
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cruisemonkey on March 02, 2012, 11:00:02 AM
Mind if I park my crotch here?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on March 05, 2012, 04:59:47 AM
Et voila.

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/nokia-fail.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on March 05, 2012, 05:17:54 AM
 ahahahahah ahahahahah Shit phones!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 05, 2012, 05:19:02 AM
It could be worse.  At least they aren't Canoodling Poodles. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on March 05, 2012, 11:53:17 AM
 ahahahahah



See Vladimir and Estragon reimagined for the 00s in


connocting poopie.

samuel beckett.



They're online, and they're... waiting
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on March 05, 2012, 08:55:47 PM
Who do I see if I don't want my poopie connocted?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on March 06, 2012, 04:14:32 AM
Who do I see if I don't want my poopie connocted?

Don't buy a Nokia phone. bpbpbpbpbp
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cruisemonkey on March 06, 2012, 09:02:42 PM
I have a Nokia... does that mean I can only call another shit-head?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 07, 2012, 02:20:21 AM
I have a Nokia... does that mean I can only call another shit-head?

Want my number? ahahahahah

(Connocted from my Nokia)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Cassnadra on March 07, 2012, 07:37:52 AM
Wait until they start concocting people...
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on March 12, 2012, 04:01:17 AM
President Obama meets the Collections Department...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/obamatroops.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 12, 2012, 08:18:57 AM
President Obama was disappointed at the low quality of candidates for The New Village People band he's putting together.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: adamsmith on March 12, 2012, 08:57:28 AM
Helllooooooo heheheheheheehehehehehe
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on March 12, 2012, 01:59:33 PM
Waaaa ta shi feizhou ren ah!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on March 12, 2012, 08:13:38 PM
Our lips are sealed!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 13, 2012, 03:04:26 AM
Helllooooooo heheheheheheehehehehehe

Do you like basketball?  Have you heard of Yao Ming?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on March 13, 2012, 09:30:47 AM
NOW who's the debtor nation, HMMMMMM????
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on March 14, 2012, 12:33:12 AM
Second guy from the right must be related to the kid in the bucket :wtf:
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 15, 2012, 02:56:44 AM
Why is that new recruit out of uniform?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on March 15, 2012, 02:06:56 PM
Queer Eye for the Straight Guy?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 16, 2012, 02:03:39 AM
Queer Eye for the Straight Guy?

 bkbkbkbkbk And Zero would do each and every one of them. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on March 19, 2012, 05:02:53 AM
A Trojan helmet for the new age...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/weird-theme-restaurants-in-asia-images_4307_4329.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 19, 2012, 07:26:34 AM
The new Raoul's Special Surprise drink was so dangerous that waiters had to wear special protection while serving it. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on March 19, 2012, 12:02:44 PM
Moxibustion.


Can be used to treat sexual dysfunction.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: adamsmith on March 19, 2012, 01:10:11 PM
China begins testing its ultra modern new spacewear for use on its proposed space station
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: old34 on March 19, 2012, 01:41:14 PM
China begins testing its ultra modern new spacewear for use on its proposed space station

So you're sayin' China will be serving Tequila Sunrises at their space station? I call bullshit.....
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: adamsmith on March 19, 2012, 01:47:45 PM
of course no sunrises there. they will be serving only baiju as it can also be used as a reserve fuel supply for their rockets.

They are doing the testing in the glorious city of Linfen where they can best simulate the condition of needed oxygen and the future astronauts are employed in local expat hangout so they can also test the ability  of the suit to repel those nasty particles that all laowai can radiate
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on March 19, 2012, 08:20:17 PM
I wonder if I should tell him that he's got it on the wrong head?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 20, 2012, 12:27:28 AM
 bkbkbkbkbk LMAO!!! bkbkbkbkbk
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Ruth on March 21, 2012, 10:34:58 AM
bkbkbkbkbk LMAO!!! bkbkbkbkbk
I agree. Good one, Granny.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on March 22, 2012, 09:15:43 AM
Rocky Zhou's Halloween costume, the serial killer from the movie Manhunter, had the perk of shielding him from the hurtful comments of customers.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on March 22, 2012, 09:36:46 AM
Beldar's illegitimate son
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on March 22, 2012, 09:38:48 AM
Howie Mandel's career has come to this?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on March 23, 2012, 08:03:07 PM
I feel like such a dick walking around like this and being stared at by foreigners!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on March 24, 2012, 01:41:19 AM
Why is that foreigner staring at me? Is there something wrong with the way I'm carrying the drink?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on March 24, 2012, 01:42:27 AM
Practicing safe service since 1949
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 24, 2012, 02:53:40 AM
The newest SARS outbreak was quickly contained by the use of innovative protection measures.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on March 25, 2012, 08:36:59 PM
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/octopus.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on March 26, 2012, 05:13:41 AM
You should throw in some lobster too
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Arnold J. Rimmer on March 26, 2012, 07:17:53 AM
I'm ink-apable of producing my octopus at this time.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on March 26, 2012, 10:38:58 AM
Can I show you a squid instead? :wtf:
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: NATO on March 26, 2012, 01:33:45 PM
That should read "Please present octopus by inserting ticket". Present octopus just out of shot.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on March 26, 2012, 04:01:50 PM
I still don't know why HK calls it an OCTOPUS card. It is an amusing name though.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cruisemonkey on March 26, 2012, 11:26:06 PM
I still don't know why HK calls it an OCTOPUS card. It is an amusing name though.

Are there eight lines?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 26, 2012, 11:30:06 PM
Hey there pretty girl, wanna see the octopus in my pocket? afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 30, 2012, 12:27:54 AM
The new Tentacle Fetish room was so popular that they had to install special gates to control access.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on March 30, 2012, 06:08:52 AM
Crap! My octopus moved to japan to become a porn star.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: piglet on March 30, 2012, 06:45:41 AM
 IT's called an Octopus cos the London one is called an Oyster.
so the world is your Octopus when you have one?  bibibibibi
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: slayer6719 on March 31, 2012, 01:24:08 AM
Clear something up for me please.
Do i insert the card into  the Octopus? (poor Octopus does HK have an RSPCA? sounds like animal cruelty to me)
And where is the card slot on the Octopus?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 31, 2012, 02:49:20 AM
Forgive my second-tier city provincialness, but just what is that a picture of?

A subway entrance gate? mmmmmmmmmm

It's either an access gate to the Hong Kong MTR system, or the access gate to The Tentacle Room.  Either way, it can get pretty kinky. afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 31, 2012, 06:10:54 AM

It's either an access gate to the Hong Kong MTR system, or the access gate to The Tentacle Room.  Either way, it can get pretty kinky. afafafafaf


Which raises the question: do octopi ever get knots in their tentacles?

Only while making love to kinky Japanese girls. afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on April 09, 2012, 02:26:47 AM
I missed a week, didn't I? Sorry...my brain has turned to cheese. ananananan
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/badjob.jpg)

"But the really  humiliating part is having to make the "ding ding ding" noise every time you're hit..."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on April 09, 2012, 02:49:21 AM
Dammit Raoul!  You weren't supposed to show pics of what my real job is. asasasasas asasasasas asasasasas
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Arnold J. Rimmer on April 09, 2012, 10:39:43 AM
If you want to get close to the (pool) sharks, you'd better go in a cage.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on April 09, 2012, 08:18:46 PM
I don't know who took the table legs, but all I can say is that I hope they don't run out of balls. bibibibibi
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: zero on April 09, 2012, 09:01:21 PM
Yes, they might go for those guys' testicles next!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on April 09, 2012, 09:22:06 PM
My thoughts exactly zero! uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on April 09, 2012, 09:54:05 PM
(There is a brand of pear brandy that has a full-size pear inside the bottle. Since the bottle has a narrow neck, the obvious question is how they get the pear inside. So...)

Son: Dad, how do they get those heads inside the cages?
Father: Well son, I think they put the cages on when they are just newborns, and they just grow up that way.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on April 10, 2012, 01:59:24 AM
Your Beloved Emperor, Escaped Lunatic, has decreed that anyone caught cheating at pool will be subjected to The Death of 10,000 Cue Balls.

Tune in to PPV Imperial Execution Channel #37 to watch.  Only $39.95 per day.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on April 16, 2012, 02:05:12 AM
Fresh meat for you!

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/wildasshouse.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on April 16, 2012, 06:02:51 AM
Finally!  Some kind soul put up a sign telling me where I can get a wild piece of ass. afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Isidnar on April 16, 2012, 11:28:34 AM
...
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on April 16, 2012, 11:40:28 PM
Turns out that my blind date was from the wide ass house. kkkkkkkkkk
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on April 22, 2012, 09:01:44 PM
Oops, I almoot fo'gots...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/dogend.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on April 22, 2012, 09:23:49 PM
It's the little things that count!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on April 23, 2012, 04:23:41 AM
Sparky the Firedog wants to remind everyone that only you can promote forest fires. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on April 23, 2012, 08:34:07 AM


Yoda-speak spoken here ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Isidnar on April 23, 2012, 10:12:50 AM
...
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: dragonsaver on April 23, 2012, 02:18:03 PM
 bkbkbkbkbk axaxaxaxax
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on April 23, 2012, 02:21:23 PM
nice one, isidnar.
My computer was taking a moment to load the pictures, and I was thinking "Dog feathers?"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on April 24, 2012, 03:03:58 AM
If you cook a dog in a forest fire, the meat will get burned.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on April 29, 2012, 07:32:03 AM
Accidental Poetry of the Year, 2012 early leader, I'd say.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on April 30, 2012, 12:50:31 AM
Woot!

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/altarclimb.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Isidnar on April 30, 2012, 01:19:27 PM
...
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Isidnar on April 30, 2012, 01:23:20 PM
...
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on April 30, 2012, 07:06:35 PM
I love Steve Martin's stand-up... akakakakak
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 01, 2012, 04:00:04 AM
All the local churches in Suzhou had to add these signs after that infamous alter climbing incident. Raoul still denies any involvement. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on May 06, 2012, 11:45:53 PM
homina homina homina...
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/Chinese-Miss-World-2007--34472.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cruisemonkey on May 07, 2012, 04:03:49 AM
Looks just like my ex-wife... and one of her was one too many. 
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 07, 2012, 06:50:28 AM
BWAHAHAHA!!!!  At last, my greatest experiment has succeeded!  My unstoppable (and incredibly hot afafafafaf) clone army is all I needed to assure success in my plan for world domination!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on May 14, 2012, 03:12:59 AM
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/lovers.jpg)

So...wrong...on...too..many...levels.........can't...choose...comment..... eeeeeeeeee
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 14, 2012, 04:20:54 AM
When you are doing your GF in a public park, make sure you know where your old bag is so she doesn't kill you. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on May 14, 2012, 05:39:22 AM
EL, I'm sure that could be reworded for the worst advice thread
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: gonzo on May 14, 2012, 06:25:55 AM
An only-in-China classic. And who ever conceptualised the sign had an American English teacher. We Australians "get off" buses. However, the Chinese "lover" "making love" etc are very 1920's.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 14, 2012, 09:33:25 AM
Pay attention to your rubber bag when getting off in lover or she might get pregnant. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: NATO on May 14, 2012, 09:59:00 AM
When I was young, 'getting off' just meant kissing someone passionately. Think it's still that way in England. Seems like good English to me, if a little informal.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Arnold J. Rimmer on May 14, 2012, 11:18:09 PM
An only-in-China classic. And who ever conceptualised the sign had an American English teacher. We Australians "get off" buses. However, the Chinese "lover" "making love" etc are very 1920's.

Not just American. It's also used in England to mean, er... heavy petting  akakakakak
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 17, 2012, 02:15:18 AM
While getting off with your lover in public, make sure to keep a bag over your head.  That way your wife and family won't be able to identify you when the video shows up on youku. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on May 21, 2012, 04:54:08 AM
Think you'll licke this one...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/licky.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 21, 2012, 06:47:46 AM
They say you can get high from licking a toad. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 21, 2012, 06:53:23 AM
BRAINS!!!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: The Local Dialect on May 21, 2012, 11:41:12 AM
What is the backstory here, exactly? Anyone know?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on May 21, 2012, 08:34:44 PM
When I was told that I'd have to do some arse licking, I thought that this would be the better option. bfbfbfbfbf  ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on May 21, 2012, 09:21:25 PM
brains, EL? how about  Mindless Zombie Goes Hungry
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 22, 2012, 02:38:33 AM
Now that the prey has been lulled to sleep by endless speeches, the queen uses her ovipositor to inject eggs into the neck of the soon-to-be-assimilated person.  From there, the newly hatched larvae will quickly migrate to the brain and begin their work.

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on May 22, 2012, 03:15:33 AM
I can still taste the baijiu through his pores.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: eggcluck on May 22, 2012, 05:18:24 AM
This is a tradtional greeting,..with 5000 years it must be in there somewhere.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on May 22, 2012, 08:06:59 AM
After all these years, a weekly photo has finally offended me.  I can never unsee that.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on May 22, 2012, 11:45:52 AM
"What is that, Old Spice?"
"Goddamn it, Larry."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 23, 2012, 02:46:12 AM
When I said "lick my head", I meant the other one.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: NATO on May 23, 2012, 11:20:37 AM
This is the sad story of Mr Zhang, who has learned to live with a man-sized abcess growing out the end of his tongue.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on May 23, 2012, 12:19:17 PM
“It does not matter how slowly you go as long as you do not stop.”

-Confucius
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 23, 2012, 11:32:03 PM
“It does not matter how slowly you go as long as you do not stop.”

-Confucius

Eeeeeewwwwwww!  aaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaa
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 28, 2012, 03:35:17 AM
Do you have what it takes to be a taste-tester for the Soylent Industries?  If so, please visit our website and fill out the online application.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on May 28, 2012, 05:18:57 AM
Snack time! bfbfbfbfbf

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/sheeppenis.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 28, 2012, 06:33:30 AM
The Soylent group of companies categorically states that it has absolutely nothing to do with this week's avatar.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: fullricebowl on May 29, 2012, 01:58:55 AM
Shinier than expected...
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cruisemonkey on May 29, 2012, 04:46:51 AM
So that's where the verb to screw comes from.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 29, 2012, 10:52:12 AM
So that's where the verb to screw comes from.

Screw Ewe! ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: MK on May 29, 2012, 03:59:17 PM
Uh...I was just telling someone that this is a relatively 'serious' China teaching forum and gave them a link...I forgot all about the front page pic though....
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cruisemonkey on May 31, 2012, 12:38:00 AM
So that's where the verb to screw comes from.

Screw Ewe! ahahahahah


You must be a Kiwi! Got your 'wellies'? (I might try to run away).  aoaoaoaoao
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 31, 2012, 05:07:40 AM
So that's where the verb to screw comes from.

Screw Ewe! ahahahahah


You must be a Kiwi! Got your 'wellies'? (I might try to run away).  aoaoaoaoao

You're giving me ba-a-a-a-ad ideas. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: gonzo on May 31, 2012, 06:27:27 AM
At least they've had an FT do the sign though.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on June 01, 2012, 02:51:35 AM
Being born in the year of the sheep, I don't like this photo.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cruisemonkey on June 01, 2012, 06:45:01 AM
Being born in the year of the sheep, I don't like this photo.

Then pull the wool over your eyes, bleat & keep grazing... especially if you notice EL approaching from behind with what looks like a large, concrete bit protruding from his 'nether regions'.

 bfbfbfbfbf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on June 01, 2012, 08:14:17 PM
Being born in the year of the sheep, I don't like this photo.

Watch out for what probably follows next...."great balls of fire." aoaoaoaoao
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cruisemonkey on June 01, 2012, 10:30:40 PM
Watch out for what probably follows next...."great balls of fire." aoaoaoaoao

ahahahahah How would the Chinese translate 'Rocky Mountain Oysters'?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on June 02, 2012, 05:05:27 AM
[quote ]
Watch out for what probably follows next...."great balls of fire." aoaoaoaoao
[/quote]

Certainly not the way I want it eaten.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on June 04, 2012, 02:46:37 AM
I'm so confused...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/unhorny.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Fozzwaldus on June 04, 2012, 05:19:06 AM
I'm so confused...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/unhorny.jpg)

hmm. I guess it's effectiveness depends on where you rub it, and for how long, and with what sort of motion.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on June 04, 2012, 06:13:55 AM
Whatever, so long as I never have to see that "lickey" picture again.  aaaaaaaaaa
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on June 04, 2012, 06:23:57 AM

Whatever, so long as I never have to see that "lickey" picture again.  aaaaaaaaaa


If they had used this product, that photo wouldn't have existed.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on June 04, 2012, 10:27:12 AM
What happened to the old adage, "The best way to get rid of temptation is to give in to it"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on June 04, 2012, 10:41:21 AM
Tastes great. Less filling.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on June 04, 2012, 10:45:06 AM
Aiiiiee!!!! aoaoaoaoao aoaoaoaoao aoaoaoaoao  You found my personal kryptonite.  Keep that stuff away from me!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cruisemonkey on June 05, 2012, 05:08:20 AM
But... I don't want my horniness exfoliated!  kkkkkkkkkk
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on June 06, 2012, 08:01:04 PM
I've heard folks talking about "The grapes of wrath"...... so this is what they mean. bibibibibi
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on June 07, 2012, 01:34:33 AM
Must . . . fight . . . horniness . . . eliminator.
Must . . . regain . . . my . . . horniness.
Who . . . can . . . help . . . me . . . in . . . my . . . darkest . . . hour?

Hi Granny Mae (SCHWING!!) akakakakak
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: NATO on June 08, 2012, 04:26:02 AM
For those that have a (g)rape problem.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on June 11, 2012, 05:35:34 AM
This week's picture...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/151-funny-china-mike.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on June 11, 2012, 06:06:42 AM
You can pick your friends.
You can pick your nose.
You can't pick your friend's nose.*

* May not apply in your area.  Check local regulations.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on June 11, 2012, 09:37:37 AM
Dad! Not in front of the lads, Ok?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: adamsmith on June 11, 2012, 10:14:36 AM
hey private, you are terribly out of uniform. First you wear the wrong hat for the uniform, and you still have your make up on from last nights date with sergeant rock.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on June 11, 2012, 10:40:54 AM
Dammit soldier!  When the Colonel tells you to swallow, you are NOT to let any splatter on your face.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on June 14, 2012, 06:52:10 AM
there, there. big boys don't cry. I'm sure the sergeant hasn't forgotten you. It's just that he's terribly busy; I'm sure he'll call you as soon as he can. I'm sure he still respects you in the morning.

Oh, it's already past noon? You have any plans for this evening, kiddo?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: decurso on June 14, 2012, 12:08:49 PM
I've been listening to a lot of Black Flag lately. Mostly in response to friends posting "bitch rock" (Tragically Hip, Barenaked Ladies , ect.) links. That shit can't hold a candle to albums like "Damaged" and "Loose Nut"

I paid 15 bucks for "Damaged" on cassette in 1986...so I'm not feeling too feeling guilty about downloading everything else.

 I've also started downloading Dr. Dementos Basement Tapes. Heh...won't spoil it for you. Just do it...and report back to me in in 30 days.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: NATO on June 14, 2012, 12:56:45 PM
Surreal decurso, that one.  bjbjbjbjbj
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on June 14, 2012, 01:42:51 PM
GOT YOUR NOSE!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on June 18, 2012, 06:26:51 AM
That time again...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/Sign_Board449.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cruisemonkey on June 18, 2012, 10:45:10 PM
'Elevator sex' gets even kinkier with the added danger of death.  afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on June 19, 2012, 08:28:25 PM
 If you start to feel hot, beware the ring of fire if you go down with someone in the elevator. uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on June 20, 2012, 06:05:43 AM
If elevator sex is outlawed, only outlaws will have elevator sex.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on June 25, 2012, 04:24:38 AM
Pucker up!

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/Weird-Kissing-Contest-in-China.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: gonzo on June 25, 2012, 04:39:14 AM
Didn't this avatar appear a few years back entitled "Dry Humping Competition", or something similarly outrageous?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on June 25, 2012, 06:02:54 AM
Once the second couple commenced kissing, all present knew that an orgy was inevitable.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on June 25, 2012, 08:23:45 PM
As part of the process in keeping up with the rest of the world, here is an example of the latest sex education classes for adults!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on June 26, 2012, 12:42:00 AM
Very good class.  You've now mastered position 27.  For position 28, we're going to need some ropes. afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on June 26, 2012, 08:59:49 PM
Hop to it to do it! afafafafaf


The combined weight bearing and tongue exercises are much better done out in the fresh air! bfbfbfbfbf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on June 27, 2012, 02:00:28 AM
Beware! Get to close to a Chinese girl and she'll clamp you down.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on June 28, 2012, 12:27:34 AM
This year's World Orgasm Day was greeted enthusiastically in China.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on July 01, 2012, 11:53:54 PM
This week's model...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/chinese-wedding01.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cruisemonkey on July 02, 2012, 12:00:27 AM
The groom is a lesbian 'trapped' in a man's body.  ::)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: psd4fan on July 02, 2012, 01:49:48 AM
Never hire EL as your wedding planner.  aoaoaoaoao aoaoaoaoao aoaoaoaoao
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: eggcluck on July 02, 2012, 05:53:22 AM
No no!, they are not the clothes some girl left here the night before! They are mine for the wedding, see? Now dont you feel silly?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on July 02, 2012, 06:21:22 AM
Another rule for living in China:  Never ever under any circumstances annoy your bride-to-be while getting ready for the wedding pics.  The consequences of this can be very unpredictable.


Never hire EL as your wedding planner.  aoaoaoaoao aoaoaoaoao aoaoaoaoao

Bwahahaha! uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: KeyserSoze on July 02, 2012, 03:05:00 PM
Zhou surreptitiously and erroneously surmised that his wedding day was the perfect time to reveal his unhealthy obsession with women's underwear.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on July 03, 2012, 08:12:59 PM
I'm sorry love! It was a "buck's party" prank gone wrong. bibibibibi
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on July 05, 2012, 12:27:01 PM
When he told her that he'd be the one wearing the pants in the family, he had no idea of the terrible vengeance she planned to take. uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on July 05, 2012, 01:48:13 PM

The father of the groom is having some trouble understanding what the problem is.

(http://i11.photobucket.com/albums/a197/Bissessar/Expat%20Saloon/FatheroftheGroom.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on July 06, 2012, 01:27:14 PM
Unclear??? I think he knows exactly what the vibe is.  Go over the top,soldier.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on July 09, 2012, 03:01:04 AM
Push a button and pick a winnah!
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/LR.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on July 09, 2012, 09:11:33 PM
All the lights are on but nobody is home! ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on July 10, 2012, 06:56:48 AM
It was this or the live, toilet-cam version.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: BrandeX on July 12, 2012, 02:52:15 AM
"our"
:)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on July 12, 2012, 04:23:23 AM
Quote
"our"
Well spotted, Brandex!! agagagagag agagagagag agagagagag agagagagag
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on July 12, 2012, 06:12:58 PM
Now that China's space program is in full swing, citizens across the country are benefiting from spinoff technology.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on July 15, 2012, 11:37:09 PM
Another one where I simply have no words...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/nohoney.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: old34 on July 15, 2012, 11:51:04 PM
Truth in advertising.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on July 16, 2012, 08:16:24 PM
Sticky situations usually cost money somehow. uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on July 17, 2012, 03:02:27 PM
Money can buy happiness.  Or, at least, happy endings. afafafafaf ahahahahah afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: zero on July 17, 2012, 04:00:06 PM
"Our massage parlor allows you to make love to the workers, for a price."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on July 22, 2012, 10:57:01 PM
Ba da bing...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/chanyao.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on July 22, 2012, 11:45:27 PM

... the long and the short of the matter is ...
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on July 23, 2012, 09:22:56 PM
No way we are going to tell you what we were discussing in the toilet! kkkkkkkkkk
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on July 24, 2012, 01:06:55 AM
I'm smiling now, but if he pats me on the head on more time, I'm going to reach up and punch his crotch so hard he'll sing soprano for a month. ffffffffff
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: kitano on July 24, 2012, 12:37:35 PM
this is a goodun

http://anongallery.org/img/1/8/asian-steve-jobs.jpg
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on July 30, 2012, 04:49:05 AM
Oops, almost forgot...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/funny-weird-backpack-Obama-Sonic.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on July 30, 2012, 11:21:59 PM
Reminds me of a student my first year in China. His jacket had a picture of Mickey Mouse but it said Spiderman.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on July 31, 2012, 12:04:36 AM
In modern presidential politics, candidates will take any endorsements they can get.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on August 05, 2012, 10:45:42 PM
Mmm-mmm good!

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/chinaunderwater.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Fozzwaldus on August 06, 2012, 12:00:55 AM
isn't that a Downs Syndrome person?

dunno, maybe in bad taste? maybe I'm being over-sensitive
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 06, 2012, 12:42:05 AM
Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor rising flood waters stays Yoshinoya Noodles from the swift completion of their customer's orders.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on August 06, 2012, 08:31:07 PM
In an effort to find more great swimmers, China is now allowing swim throughs as well as drive throughs in many food outlets. bfbfbfbfbf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: gonzo on August 07, 2012, 12:12:32 AM
Japanese or Chinese? I know there are many Japanese franchises in China, but the "IN' sign isn't very Chinese. Also, recent flooding affected both countries.
BTW, in 15 years dealing with them, I haven't met an East Asian student who says noodles or dumplings. Its always the freaking singular. Our poor teaching perhaps?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 07, 2012, 05:45:23 AM
Yoshinoya Noodles - So good that our customers keep coming back no matter what obstacles might be in the way.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cruisemonkey on August 08, 2012, 11:05:56 AM
Yoshinoya Noodles - just add water!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: eggcluck on August 08, 2012, 11:25:16 AM
Japanese or Chinese?

Pretty sure it's Japanese.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 09, 2012, 12:28:22 AM
Japanese or Chinese?

Pretty sure it's Japanese.

Japanese or Chinese?  It doesn't matter.  Once you've experienced the delicious taste of Yoshinoya noodles, you'll swim through a raging river to get more.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: gonzo on August 09, 2012, 12:39:54 AM
Possibly, but once the doors are opened to non-Chinese weekly avatars, then civilisation is doomed. Let's stay true to our roots folks. As a Raoul's co-founder I have stakes in the heritage of this place. And I'd go with Fozwaldus re: bad taste.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 09, 2012, 04:05:47 AM
Even if civilization is doomed, Yoshinoya noodles are never in bad taste.  Come hell or high water, our customers can't get enough of Yoshinoya noodles.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 13, 2012, 01:04:20 AM
Looks like El Hefe forgot to post the new pic in the thread.

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/semencassia.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 13, 2012, 01:06:58 AM
Let's all try very very hard not to imagine what the process of stuffing these pillows must look like. aqaqaqaqaq
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: MK on August 13, 2012, 01:49:18 AM
Hey, I sent in a few pics but I don't think this was one of mine!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 13, 2012, 04:35:52 AM
I had a pic of the same thing and didn't send it in yet.

I've attached an inappropriate sound file for this week's avatar.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on August 13, 2012, 04:56:38 AM
Almost forgot...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/semencassia.jpg)


Hey, I sent in a few pics but I don't think this was one of mine!

You're right. I corrected the attribution with apologies to all concerned... llllllllll
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 13, 2012, 08:43:18 AM
Guaranteed to give you a happy ending every night. afafafafaf

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Just Like Mr Benn on August 13, 2012, 10:34:44 AM
Last time i complain that Chinese condoms are too small.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 13, 2012, 11:35:37 AM
And all this time we though our Chinese wives and/or GF's were swallowing. kkkkkkkkkk
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on August 13, 2012, 01:52:48 PM
Is that a pillow in your pocket or are you just glad to see me?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on August 13, 2012, 08:30:07 PM
"Our aim is always to please..... Your aim will help!"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 14, 2012, 01:45:28 AM
Don't forget to wrap that rascal - in a pillowcase. ahahahahah

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 14, 2012, 02:03:02 AM
Huge numbers of pregnancies linked to semen filled pillows.  Company representatives say that there's no law against this and the pillows were clearly marked.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: psd4fan on August 17, 2012, 08:31:25 AM
Freshly squeezed.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on August 19, 2012, 09:30:33 PM
Wow, you people are naaaaasty. uuuuuuuuuu

Anyway...chow time!

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/chinese_tooth_01.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: becster79 on August 19, 2012, 10:39:40 PM
No idea for a heading, but I love it  bfbfbfbfbf!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 20, 2012, 02:37:49 AM
Sadly, a few people completely misunderstood the concept of having an iron rice bowl. bibibibibi
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on August 20, 2012, 03:06:04 AM
When they said "its the end of the iron rice bowl", they really meant it!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: mlaeux on August 21, 2012, 01:22:43 PM
Not a heading - a question.

Is that hub cap he's chewing on?  mmmmmmmmmm
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on August 22, 2012, 07:26:42 AM
No, Mr Bond, I expect you to die!
Woohoo, thinks Oddjob, if this doesn't work, I'll eat my hat!
Doh!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 22, 2012, 08:35:25 AM
If I can just chew a little more off this discus, I'll be able to throw it far enough to win the gold medal.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 23, 2012, 04:07:31 AM
4 out of 5 people agree - Mercedes hubcaps taste better than BMW hubcaps.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on August 23, 2012, 08:20:35 PM
Chinese man tests theory about biting off more than you can chew!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 24, 2012, 02:43:16 AM
Chinese man tests theory about biting off more than you can chew!

A new sport has been invented by members of the Manchu nationality. bpbpbpbpbp
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on August 27, 2012, 03:44:33 AM
¡Viva las Luchadoras!

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/facekini.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 27, 2012, 05:36:14 AM
Scientists have recently revealed that this is what Chinese girls really look like before they put on makeup.
 aaaaaaaaaa aoaoaoaoao aaaaaaaaaa aoaoaoaoao aaaaaaaaaa
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Fozzwaldus on August 27, 2012, 10:10:36 AM
'bring out the gimp'

'the gimps swimming'

'well fish him out then'
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on August 27, 2012, 10:12:32 AM
Yellow: Is that a foreigner?
Blue: Looks like.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on August 27, 2012, 01:09:48 PM
yellow: why is he looking at us?
blue: I don't know, but I'm not sure I like it. Let's say hello and walk away.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 28, 2012, 04:33:28 AM
Bad ideas recipe #8096

3 shots of baijiu
2 pieces of brightly colored spandex
1 bottle of superglue
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latitude on August 28, 2012, 06:03:46 AM
You guys should embrace this fashion. This is a rare opportunity to look like the locals. uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on August 28, 2012, 07:33:30 AM
I'm not sure that wearing a yellow mask to look like the locals is a good idea.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Fozzwaldus on August 28, 2012, 09:26:04 AM
not a heading, but, looking at the photo, won't they just end up with really black hands??  mmmmmmmmmm mmmmmmmmmm
hasn't anybody heard of sunblock??
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 28, 2012, 10:50:16 AM
A new method for saving face. bjbjbjbjbj

not a heading, but, looking at the photo, won't they just end up with really black hands??  mmmmmmmmmm mmmmmmmmmm
hasn't anybody heard of sunblock??

Don't worry - gloves (and socks) are next.

I'm not sure that wearing a yellow mask to look like the locals is a good idea.

Damn.  I as all ready to order a yellow one on taobao.


Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on August 28, 2012, 11:22:31 AM
Yellow: I dunno...
Blue: Yeah, you know.


http://www.gamesradar.com/call-duty-online-brings-modern-warfare-china/
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on August 28, 2012, 01:51:11 PM
yellow: you sure this is gonna work?
blue: absolutely. Remember what it said on the box; good for skin, good for health, and sexy as hell to foreigners.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 29, 2012, 01:52:22 AM
Face peels from unlicensed plastic surgeons can have unfortunate side effects.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on August 29, 2012, 02:23:20 AM
Yellow and blue movie stars together for the first time.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 29, 2012, 02:45:33 AM
If they smack their heads together, will that leave green marks? mmmmmmmmmm
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on August 29, 2012, 03:24:34 AM
Yellow: Hey, lock S-foils in attack position!
Blue: Red Leader?
Yellow: Yeah. There he is now.
Blue: That guy is such an idiot.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: MK on August 29, 2012, 03:35:37 AM
This pic would have given me nightmares as a child.

Quote
hasn't anybody heard of sunblock??

Haven't you heard?  Sunblock gives you cancer/causes pimples/makes you fat/is shanghuo/doesn't block radiation/stops your skin from breathing so you will suffocate/is made from gutter oil.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 29, 2012, 04:01:09 AM
She's too sexy for her face, too sexy for her face
Too sexy to disgrace
And she's too sexy for her skin, too sexy for her skin
No sunlight will get in


Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on August 29, 2012, 04:15:15 AM
China's ruthless One Child Policy has given rise to a new breed of older woman, the Urban Mommando, ever vigilant, always watchful, protective of future assets in an increasingly competitive society full of crime.

Yellow: Your 10 o'clock, that lady looking at our boy?
Blue: Can't be sure, better take her out.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 29, 2012, 05:21:27 AM
It may look like it's merely a new high fashion item worn by the most stylist beachgoers, but the Human Emergency Assist Device also protects wearers from drowning.  Just pull the recessed distress cord on your HEAD and it inflates, providing floatation when you most needed it.

If you really love someone, give them HEAD at the beach.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on August 29, 2012, 05:49:19 AM
Yellow: What's the line?
Blue: WE'LL TEAR YOUR SOUL APART!
Yellow: Really?
Blue: WE HAVE SUCH SIGHTS TO SHOW YOU.
Yellow: That's the one, yeah.
Blue: I. AM. PAIN.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: roadwalker on August 29, 2012, 09:54:21 AM
Yellow: Hey, see those laowais?

Blue:  Over by the water?

Yellow:  That's right. I think the bald one with all the bodyguards likes you!  He's been staring this way for a while...kinda looks like Putin.

Blue:  What's a Putin?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on August 29, 2012, 10:12:44 AM
Ha, yes, totally forgot about that.


Yellow: Pussy Riot?
Blue: At the meat market?
Yellow: I guess so.
Blue: Filthy southerners.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 30, 2012, 12:34:19 AM
All citizens are celebrating since North Korea's newest glorious leader has made his personally designed line of swimwear mandatory at all beaches.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on August 30, 2012, 03:26:58 AM
yellow: Is that the glorious leader who designed these mandatory swimsuits?
blue: yeah, that's him.
yellow: don't you think these are wonderful?
blue:
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 31, 2012, 03:46:56 AM
There's great news about the newest version of the Human Emergency Assist Device.  Now, in addition to the emergency floatation function, HEAD comes lined with a genuine tinfoil radiation blocking inner layer.  Mind-controlling rays as well as dangerous radiation from computer monitors and cell phones are all safely blocked.  Now this high fashion item is good for the beach, the office, or a day out shopping.

For friends and anyone you love, there's nothing better to show you care than giving then HEAD.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on August 31, 2012, 11:34:35 PM
Yellow: Is that--?
Blue: Short pants in May.
Yellow: I feel sorry for his mother.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 01, 2012, 02:58:20 AM
Even with their facekinis on, Gong Li and Zhang Ziyi still can't avoid the paparazzi. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: psd4fan on September 01, 2012, 05:04:43 AM
"Lost you face? Afraid of losing it again? Try the new Ronco Spray on Face. It's face in a can."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cruisemonkey on September 01, 2012, 07:43:06 AM
The female stars of the Chinese version of 'Baywatch' ponder their low ratings.  mmmmmmmmmm
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on September 01, 2012, 02:05:20 PM
Bring out the gimp!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on September 02, 2012, 12:21:01 PM
No, officer!  We're not supporting Pussy Riot!  We're just very ugly!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 03, 2012, 12:07:07 AM
"Lost you face? Afraid of losing it again? Try the new Ronco Spray on Face. It's face in a can."

I think they need some Ronco Spray-on Hair to go with it. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on September 03, 2012, 05:01:25 AM
Here y'all is...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/12-funny-chinese-sign.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on September 03, 2012, 07:52:49 AM
And then the Southside Crips drove by.

aoaoaoaoao
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: roadwalker on September 03, 2012, 08:00:31 AM
...before he hit it big with rap.  We also have a pretty old pre-Notorious B.I.G photo of Biggie Smalls as Geisha.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: roadwalker on September 03, 2012, 08:02:40 AM
And then the Southside Crips drove by.

aoaoaoaoao

Dang, beat me to it.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 04, 2012, 02:26:44 AM
The ultimate defeat of the Ko Dak Dynasty was primarily attributed to their soldiers stopping to take photos during battle.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on September 10, 2012, 01:28:36 AM
I'm still confused...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/funny-English-signs-in-China-15.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 10, 2012, 10:18:02 AM
Sounds like another analect from Confusious.  ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 11, 2012, 05:35:35 AM
Om mani padme hum
Om mani padme hum
Om mani padme hum
Om mani padme erk. . . er. . . what were we saying . . . mmmmmmmmmm

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on September 11, 2012, 09:42:19 AM
UmUm But us Bermudians, UmUm we have this UmUm shibboleth, where we UmUm sound confused all the time! ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on September 11, 2012, 02:06:42 PM
aiyah, aiyah, doanna thinka
thassa bermudia thing-ah
aiya, aiyah, doanna thinka
thassa bermudia thing-ah

aiyah, aiyah, just suppose-ah
tha' maybe-ah, tha' maybe-ah
we're all confused-ah alla-time-ah
yeah-ah, yeah-ah, all confused-ah
all confused-ah alla-time-ah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 12, 2012, 12:42:57 AM
We chant to honor Great Cthulhu
Always remembering to not say his name 3 times
For if we said Cthulhu too often
Cthulhu would come to consume our bodies and souls
Oh wait, that was a bad chant
No, please
We didn't mean it
AAAIEEEE!!!!!!!!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 14, 2012, 01:09:09 AM
Unlike the last guys, don't say Cthulhu when chanting
Unlike the last guys, don't say Cthulhu when chanting
Unlike the last guys, don't say Cthulhu when chanting
Unlike the last guys, don't say Cthulhu whe . . . AAAIIIIEEEEE!!!!!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on September 14, 2012, 03:47:47 AM
For it's a jolly good Cthulhu,
For it's a jolly good Cthulhu,
For it's a jolly good Cthulhu,
That nobody can denyyaaiiiiiii

Brought to you by the makers of cthiapet
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on September 16, 2012, 06:38:14 PM
Yep, definitely time for a new photo. bibibibibi

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/terminatingmachine.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on September 16, 2012, 08:57:25 PM
Go ahead; Let me make your day!!!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 17, 2012, 01:02:16 AM
Soylent Industries is proud to introduce their new line of Soylent ATMs (Automatic Termination Machines).

Tired of life and decided you just can't go on?  Don't want to wait for an appointment at one of our attended termination facilities?  Visit your nearest conveniently located Soylent ATM and end it all now.

Features:

100% Free!
Guaranteed Quick and Painless
You can leave up to 3 different goodbye messages and specify recipients and delivery times.


If life isn't worth living, surrender yours and contribute to the world's food supply at the same time.  Soylent Industries is here to help.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on September 17, 2012, 04:21:24 AM
China's One Self policy... now self administered.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on September 17, 2012, 04:53:16 AM
Chinese version of Futurama's suicide booth.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 17, 2012, 04:55:52 AM
Governments around the world have now united to bring quick and simple Universal Healthcare to all people.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: roadwalker on September 17, 2012, 08:20:48 AM
Notice:  This terminus is located outside of your free local service area.  An additional fee of approximately an arm and a leg will be deducted from your account upon completion of this transaction.  If you agree to these terms, please press the "I Agree" button.  We realize that you have many options for self-terminating and appreciate your business! 

                                  (http://www.highrisesociety.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/11/Agree-button.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 17, 2012, 09:58:01 AM
Since the Bureau of Public Harmony installed their new automated complaint resolution machines, there hasn't been a single case of anyone expressing dissatisfaction a second time. uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Canadapanda on September 17, 2012, 05:10:49 PM
The one child policy just wasn't enough to keep population growth under control.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on September 17, 2012, 10:35:17 PM
The service charges are killers
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 18, 2012, 12:59:33 AM
Press 1 to be disemboweled.

Death usually takes place in 3 minutes to 1 hour.

Press 2 to be dropped into a pit full of hungry weasels.

Death usually takes 5 to 10 minutes.

Press 3 to be slowly lowered feet first into a meat grinder.

Death takes approximately 2 minutes.

Press 4 to be licked to death by Gong Li and Zhang Ziyi.

Death usually takes from 2 to 6 months.


Hmmmnnn... hard choice, but I think I'll have to go with 4.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on September 18, 2012, 02:44:13 PM
4 might be faster than you imagine. Or maybe not

your action                    elapsed time         your wife's action
look at number 4 on keypad    0.01 nanoseconds     looks up from TV set
looking                       0.1 nanoseconds      thinks something isn't right
consider touching 4           1.25 nanoseconds     knows something isn't right
considering                   0.75 nanoseconds     gets that look (the first one)

you may not realise it, but it's already too late

considering                   0.9 seconds          decides what to do about it
reach for 4                   0.1 seconds          gets going
reaching                      0.5 seconds          starts phoning friends
touching and depressing key   0.5 seconds          coming to get you, still phoning friends
get dial tone                 2.5 seconds          still phoning friends, still coming
getting dial tone             0.5 seconds          gets that look (the next one)
connected                     0.1 second           phones 1,000th friend, still coming
get automated answering service:
"thank you for calling Gong Li and Zhang Ziyi lick you to death.
We'll be pleased to make your demise a memorable one. Please hold the line"
                              10 seconds             new land speed record is set.
                                                      her phone explodes
holding                       0.01 nanoseconds       she gets that look (#3)
holding                  1 nanosecond to 20 minutes       she gets there
holding                  5 seconds                        she silently approaches you
holding                  2 nanoseconds                    she gets that look (#4)
still holding,
begin to sense something isn't right  2 nanoseconds    getting look (still #4)
wonder what it is             0.9 seconds              hell freezes over
you turn around                0.5 seconds             she draws a deep breath
uhh...                         0.2 seconds             gets that look (#5)
...oh                          0.2 seconds             lets you have it
cringe                         0.1-2.5 seconds         really lets you have it
wish you were dead         1 minute to 10,000 years     really, really lets you have it
wishing                    10 minutes to 10,000 years   hits second gear
really wishing             time is elastic             there's more to come
really wishing             eternity was then           there's still more to come
it finally happens         not soon enough             and another thing
a live voice:
"Thanks for making us your source for remorse. We're always glad to help"
                               5 seconds                and yet another thing
Automated dustpan collects your ashes; nothing left to convert to soylent
                               3 seconds                and yet another, other thing
"Is there anything else we can do for you?"
                                3 seconds               pause for breath
                                3 seconds               "no, that'll be all. Thanks, girls"

Who did you think she was on the phone with?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on September 23, 2012, 10:05:09 PM
This one could be interesting...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/wrapped_zpsa921517b.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 24, 2012, 01:56:53 AM
Surrounded by a crowd of delighted Chinese entomologists, a "butterfly man" prepares to emerge from his cocoon.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Canadapanda on September 24, 2012, 02:52:58 AM
My friend's response: "If it was a non-asian, they'd need stronger tape."

-----------

"Hahaha look at you losers, using your feet to stand.  I'm actually quite comfortable up here."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: roadwalker on September 24, 2012, 04:42:22 AM
Amazing "Levitating Man" confounds passers-by, laws of physics!  How does he do it?!!!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: roadwalker on September 24, 2012, 04:59:10 AM
One-Child-Policy Related Gender Imbalance Hits Critical Point
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Pashley on September 24, 2012, 04:59:47 AM
Chinese attempting to run someone out of town on a rail.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on September 24, 2012, 08:41:53 PM
Tell mum I'm tied up at the moment, so I will be home a bit late!

Let's see how this guy gets out of a sticky situation!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: gonzo on September 25, 2012, 02:23:47 AM
In Xinjiang, a student made a light hearted remark about The Prophet, but got off lightly.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Canadapanda on September 25, 2012, 07:39:15 AM
Are you stuck in a tree?  At least the tree isn't stuck in you.  Anything can happen in China, you know...
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on September 25, 2012, 10:42:22 AM
Oh, how pole-sitting has been reduced in stature.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: NATO on September 25, 2012, 10:43:21 AM
He told them he was Spiderman, they all laughed.

He said he'd prove it, they laughed harder.

WHOSE LAUGHING NOW, SUCKERS.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 25, 2012, 10:44:55 AM
The Venus Mantrap claims another victim. kkkkkkkkkk
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 26, 2012, 10:06:11 AM
Another pickpocket had been captured and left for the police by China's newest crime fighting super hero, Packing Tape Man.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on September 27, 2012, 05:11:09 AM
Wishing to order well their states, they first regulated their families. Wishing to regulate their families, they first cultivated their persons. Wishing to cultivate their persons, they taped them to trees.



Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 27, 2012, 09:20:36 AM
Extreme tree huggers - the bane of urban lumberjacks.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 30, 2012, 02:21:45 AM
My wife told me to stick around while she went shopping.
I said, "No, I've got other things to do."
Then she got out the tape.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 30, 2012, 08:57:36 AM
No one will be his friend anymore - since he's so stuck up. bpbpbpbpbp
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on September 30, 2012, 10:06:14 PM
I actually sympathize with this guy...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/dontcallonme.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on September 30, 2012, 10:07:06 PM
How Not To Get Stared At...
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 01, 2012, 01:50:47 AM
Chinese development of stealth technology has taken an unexpected turn.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on October 01, 2012, 02:00:46 AM
Tom Snout, the wittiest partition.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 01, 2012, 02:17:24 AM
That wall is so well camouflaged that it blends in perfectly with that guy's clothing. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: roadwalker on October 01, 2012, 03:32:11 AM
That Leonard Zelig is quite the character....
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 01, 2012, 09:40:29 AM
It's people!  Soylent Walls Are Made of PEOPLE!!!!!! aoaoaoaoao aoaoaoaoao aoaoaoaoao
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on October 07, 2012, 09:47:57 PM
Catch the crabs!

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/crabvend.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 08, 2012, 12:34:31 AM
Could be worse.  Could be a live chicken vending machine. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on October 08, 2012, 03:27:26 AM
Those are kept under the counter and sold in plain brown paper bags, EL  oooooooooo
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 08, 2012, 11:37:32 AM
Those are kept under the counter and sold in plain brown paper bags, EL  oooooooooo

I thought they only did that at the Goat-O-Mat. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 13, 2012, 03:05:16 AM
Tired of having your cranky little emperor whining the whole length of your trip?  Subway PetsTM can solve your problem!  Just buy a live pet for him to play with.  If it survives until the end of the trip, you can even turn it in for a 50% refund.

Subway PetsTM currently offers crabs and hedge hogs.

Coming soon: garter snakes, crickets, and turtles.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on October 14, 2012, 08:02:08 PM
Thanks Piglet for this one! agagagagag

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/blingmassage_piglet.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: piglet on October 14, 2012, 11:51:19 PM
It may be my pic but I can't beat your caption,man
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 15, 2012, 01:16:51 AM
Might as well go out for a special services massage.  Last week's pic already gave me a case of crabs. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cruisemonkey on October 15, 2012, 10:43:03 AM
Last week's pic already gave me a case of crabs. ahahahahah

Definitely no 'happy ending' there!  ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on October 19, 2012, 03:27:44 AM
Notice the sign behind the sign??? Blind massage.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: adamsmith on October 19, 2012, 05:04:53 AM
our 'blind' massages happy ending will turn into a 'bling' massage for you.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on October 19, 2012, 03:28:54 PM
Time for a little sump'n, sump'n.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 20, 2012, 02:38:02 AM
Notice the sign behind the sign??? Blind massage.

I'm pretty sure it says "Blinf Massage"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on October 20, 2012, 04:39:06 AM
See it!  One little, confused Oriental fellow faced with a bewildering array of foreign symbols -- "I don't know which way these silly laowai things go. Up, down, left, right.  Who knows?  Who cares?  It won't matter.  I'll just stick them up any way that seems most harmonious to ME!"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 22, 2012, 04:08:18 AM
Looks like Raoul found us a new pic, but forgot to put it in the thread.

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/asia_13.jpg)

Don't have a yard?  Don't want to deal with a leash getting all tangled up?  Don't even want to worry about having to clean up the mess in your apartment?  If so, Portable DogTM, Pat. Pend. is just right for you.

Just carry your little furry friend wherever you want to go.  At home, hang him up over the toilet so you never have to worry about him chewing the furniture or leaving other messes for you to clean up.

Portable DogTM, Pat. Pend., now available in major retail stores throughout China.


Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on October 22, 2012, 04:20:16 AM
Hmmmmm. Was this pic even taken in China??
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on October 22, 2012, 05:46:17 AM
EL: Thanks! I fo'gots! akakakakak

Gerge: Shaddup, you! asasasasas
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on October 22, 2012, 07:06:01 AM
 ahahahahah ahahahahah ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 22, 2012, 09:35:12 AM
And due to the extra teeth, it's very resistant to purse snatchers.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on October 22, 2012, 01:15:04 PM
That is a great pic, RD!
EL, not sure about the dog/rodent/whichever being purse snatcher resistant. It was supposed to carry the I-phone in its mouth, no?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 23, 2012, 12:29:15 AM
That is a great pic, RD!
EL, not sure about the dog/rodent/whichever being purse snatcher resistant. It was supposed to carry the I-phone in its mouth, no?

I think the phone slot is at the other end. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on October 23, 2012, 01:43:04 AM
Damn Chinglish! The sign where I bought this said "Pouch", not "Pooch".
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on October 23, 2012, 02:10:41 AM
Freudian.

Almost too Freudian.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 23, 2012, 03:40:11 AM
Next week's pic:  Cat in a fanny pack. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: gonzo on October 23, 2012, 04:28:21 AM
So where is the photo from? Not China. She is probably of Chinese extraction, but not necessarily. And the dog? Ay Carumba!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on October 24, 2012, 09:09:16 PM
This is the latest guide watch dog. It is being trained to keep its eyes on the ground and to warn the owner of any potholes etc which could cause her to have a nasty fall. This has become necessary given the heel height in ladies shoes and the fact that she needs to be able to keep her eyes on the latest fashions and other more important things.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 26, 2012, 12:34:01 AM
Version 2 of the Dog Purse is much more realistic than the original.

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 27, 2012, 02:24:12 AM
If only they made a cat fanny pack.

Oh wait.  They do.

(http://craziestgadgets.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/06/cat-fanny-pack.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on October 27, 2012, 08:25:00 PM
I've had to restrain myself here, but I'll bet he does a lot of bragging. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on October 29, 2012, 01:21:53 AM
Oh! You naughty monkeys!

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/burnedmeat.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 29, 2012, 02:59:49 AM
Truth in advertising finally has arrived. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: piglet on October 29, 2012, 12:11:48 PM
By the way one of my students claims it really means BACON???  ahahahahah so the Torah sages had it right?? wtf?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 30, 2012, 03:21:02 AM
Soylent biscuits are made out of burned meat!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: gonzo on October 30, 2012, 08:33:35 AM
My wife says it means BBQ flavour. I believe her, and many BBQs ARE burned meat.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on October 30, 2012, 08:48:43 AM
A flavour biscuit is, however, something quite different.


A sniffs the air. "What is that? Burned meat?"
B: "No, man. That's a flavour biscuit."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 30, 2012, 09:58:11 AM
Burned Vegetable flavor now available.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on October 31, 2012, 06:01:18 AM
Too many very bad karma jokes to make.

NB: Product does not exist at all in western China.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on November 05, 2012, 02:52:12 AM
One has to wonder where this sign actually appeared...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/john_nolefan.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: old34 on November 05, 2012, 03:44:30 AM
I've seen signs similar to this in a couple of restrooms. It means stand closer to the urinal when you piss.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: The Local Dialect on November 05, 2012, 03:56:19 AM
Yeah literally it says something like "stand a little bit closer, be a LOT more civilized."

So someone was totally taking the piss (!) with the translation, apparently. 
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on November 05, 2012, 09:33:29 AM
One has to wonder where this sign actually appeared...


On the wall in the Ladies' Room at the Saloon ... especially for George, when he's wearing his qipao :wtf:
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on November 06, 2012, 01:27:56 PM
So why the hell is the avatar smiling??? Eunuch?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 06, 2012, 03:31:30 PM
My wife assures me that it is exactly as long as I think it is. afafafafaf

Considering how frequently and thoroughly she points out my other flaws, I believe she's telling the truth.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on November 06, 2012, 08:51:36 PM
"We aim to please; your aim will help!" bfbfbfbfbf

 
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on November 12, 2012, 02:47:00 AM
Where's Waldo?

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/traffic.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 12, 2012, 04:21:56 AM
A much lower than expected turnout at bus stations around town should make life easy for commuters this morning.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: The Local Dialect on November 12, 2012, 05:52:02 AM
If you guys think that's bad, I should take a picture of the subway at rush hour on my way to work tomorrow ...
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on November 12, 2012, 06:51:59 AM
I have to say that crowds have become much easier to navigate since the Chinese discovered queuing
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on November 12, 2012, 10:43:29 AM
Can you spot the Lone Laowai in this picture? mmmmmmmmmm
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: NATO on November 12, 2012, 06:02:13 PM
"Chinese passengers take advantage of the lull before the daily rush hour"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 13, 2012, 02:54:18 AM
Approximately 3000 deaths and 25.000 serious injuries, but we did manage to break the world record for how many people could squeeze into one city bus. agagagagag
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on November 19, 2012, 12:05:12 AM
Say hunh?!?

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/China_Funny_English_inscriptions_Summer-Palace-Beijing.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: becster79 on November 19, 2012, 12:58:05 AM
I see this every weekend on the Guangzhou Metro  ahahahahah bibibibibi
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 19, 2012, 01:34:59 AM
I suggest turning neither left nor right, but instead proceeding forward.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on November 19, 2012, 06:25:28 AM
The guider, with a classy kind of sassy, told me to....


WALK THIS WAY!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 19, 2012, 07:26:12 AM
I don't see what the confusion is.  If you are a visitor, go left.  If you are "this way", go right.  Otherwise, stand still and await further instructions.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: roadwalker on November 19, 2012, 10:01:17 AM
I'm torn....
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 20, 2012, 03:41:13 AM
I'm torn....

Chinese philosophers have embarked on a new signage campaign designed to make foreigners take the time to stop and contemplate which is the best path to take.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on November 20, 2012, 08:22:25 AM
Where's my jetpack?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 20, 2012, 09:26:56 AM
Two roads diverged in a Chinese wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And read one sign as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;


Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on November 20, 2012, 09:28:38 AM
Alice was in China?!?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on November 26, 2012, 03:07:26 AM
How do they know what color your English is? mmmmmmmmmm

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/whiteenglish.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: piglet on November 26, 2012, 03:40:09 AM
At last honesty in advertising  aaaaaaaaaa
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: roadwalker on November 26, 2012, 04:10:40 AM
So foolish....anyone can teach white English.  But call me if you need someone to teach some #@#$! blue English! asasasasas .  Otherwise,  :lickass:  White English, ....sigh....
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 26, 2012, 04:15:45 AM
Please tell me there's not a small sign nearby saying "Colored English use back door."
 :wtf:
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: gonzo on November 26, 2012, 04:54:18 AM
None of this anti racist, sexist ageist bullshit. The Chinese tell it like it is. Good onya Chinamen.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 26, 2012, 06:37:10 AM
None of this anti racist, sexist ageist bullshit. The Chinese tell it like it is. Good onya Chinamen.

I wonder what Gonzo's reaction would have been if it had said "Australians need not apply." mmmmmmmmmm ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: psd4fan on November 26, 2012, 07:41:36 AM
So no Ebonic either?  ababababab
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on November 27, 2012, 06:46:56 AM
Lilly white? Off white? Be specific.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on November 27, 2012, 07:58:36 PM
"I'm dreaming of a White Christmas........"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 28, 2012, 12:25:24 AM
Nazi English is now recruiting new teachers. hhhhhhhhhh
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: gonzo on November 28, 2012, 04:07:47 AM
None of this anti racist, sexist ageist bullshit. The Chinese tell it like it is. Good onya Chinamen.

I wonder what Gonzo's reaction would have been if it had said "Australians need not apply." mmmmmmmmmm ahahahahah

Mine? No Aussie worthy of his or her heritage would apply for this job. I'm almost tempted to make a call to the advertised number, put them through the process and then tell them to stick their racist job up their racist arses.
However the website the advert comes from just shows up as porn: thanks George!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on November 28, 2012, 05:26:03 AM
Maybe I should tell my buddy Leroy White to apply for this job.

What are the current rules of whiteness these days anyway? Is it still one drop of white blood makes you one of them?

It's pretty inclusive for a change, even the Irish are allowed.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: piglet on November 28, 2012, 06:41:30 AM
I am sort of dirty pink is that ok? Oops I also have a huge schnook.  ababababab
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on November 28, 2012, 06:45:08 AM
Quote
However the website the advert comes from just shows up as porn: thanks George!
I didn't suggest you go to  the site, Gonzo.  bibibibibi
It's an interesting site though, in as much as it has it's cute bits, such as that shot, but also some appallingly racist and sexist crap! It's a West Aust site so that's probably as much as we can expect from there.
PS..as you can see, it's not an advert on the site, it's a pic of a sign, somewhere in China.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 28, 2012, 07:32:38 AM
It's pretty inclusive for a change, even the Irish are allowed.

Irish are acceptable, but No Belgians!  We have to draw the line somewhere. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: gonzo on November 28, 2012, 08:06:08 AM

PS..as you can see, it's not an advert on the site, it's a pic of a sign, somewhere in China.

Nah, just the phone number on the sign. You're as racist as I am old buddy.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on November 28, 2012, 08:28:14 AM
It's pretty inclusive for a change, even the Irish are allowed.

Irish are acceptable, but No Belgians!  We have to draw the line somewhere. ahahahahah

Italians?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 28, 2012, 10:08:00 AM
It's pretty inclusive for a change, even the Irish are allowed.

Irish are acceptable, but No Belgians!  We have to draw the line somewhere. ahahahahah

Italians?

Hot looking female Italians yes.  Others will be considered on a case-by-case basis.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on December 03, 2012, 07:07:40 AM
Meanwhile: this week's monster...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/drops_macattack.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on December 03, 2012, 11:43:48 AM
The few wild birds in China that haven't been eaten are known for their large droppings.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on December 03, 2012, 09:34:32 PM
KEEP AWAY from this area or it will be on your own head!


So it is true....pigs can fly!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on December 05, 2012, 01:58:53 AM
The Japanese text reads "Wait in front of this sign and you will get a special gift from the people of China." uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: NATO on December 07, 2012, 06:54:11 AM
Sorry.

This person moved or deleted this image.

I just HATE when that happens.


 bjbjbjbjbj
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on December 09, 2012, 02:38:51 AM
Chinese society became much more harmonious after these signs were posted along all paths leading beneath Chinese toilet facilities.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on December 10, 2012, 04:45:55 AM
Don't pinch this fruit!

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/funny_chinese_product4.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on December 10, 2012, 05:54:51 AM
Dammit Raoul!!! asasasasas  You weren't supposed to publicly share that pic of my wife's ass! asasasasas
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on December 10, 2012, 05:58:00 AM
But it's so round, firm and yellow... afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Mr Nobody on December 10, 2012, 09:54:34 AM
There is only one. Usually it's a pair.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on December 10, 2012, 10:57:15 AM
umm, that's not quite what I meant when I said that she had a nice pear
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Raoul F. Duke on January 07, 2013, 05:06:47 AM
It's open season on cover pictures again! axaxaxaxax

Here's China's version of Blue Man Group...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v176/RaoulSaloon/Saloonies/bluemangroup.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on January 07, 2013, 05:42:15 AM
Casual Friday, Chinese style. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: eggcluck on January 07, 2013, 06:30:28 AM
I gotta do the obvious :)

你看吧! 老外!....hallo, he he he.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Just Like Mr Benn on January 07, 2013, 07:56:12 AM
I may look as though I'm conforming, but underneath, I'm wearing sexy pink lingerie.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on January 07, 2013, 08:36:45 AM
Headlining today: New York's The Blue Man Group!

Doesn't encore.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: fox on January 07, 2013, 12:32:58 PM
blue collar workers in china.   
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on January 08, 2013, 12:16:49 AM
Fashion Week in Anhui always brings out the most unique and daring new styles.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on January 08, 2013, 10:49:21 AM
"My God, Dexter... how did we end up here?"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on January 08, 2013, 05:05:41 PM
Hey Cho, is that a Crip?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on January 09, 2013, 12:04:56 AM
If we get enough people wearing sky blue outfits, it will reflect in the atmosphere and make the sky look blue.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on January 10, 2013, 09:36:50 PM
I don't know why we bother checking; it's always a male photographer! bibibibibi
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cruisemonkey on January 10, 2013, 11:21:38 PM
I thought the east was red.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: fox on January 15, 2013, 09:46:52 AM
we should keep the current picture of Raoul F duke up for minimum of 6 months. out of respect for the man who created this for us all.  A truly generous man who got a bit of a raw deal of this life, but made the most of it.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: piglet on January 15, 2013, 06:02:51 PM
Agree,Fox good idea.  bjbjbjbjbj bjbjbjbjbj
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on January 15, 2013, 08:23:11 PM
I would love to see some more photos of Raoul if anyone has some.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: gonzo on January 15, 2013, 11:09:17 PM
we should keep the current picture of Raoul F duke up for minimum of 6 months
I'm pretty sure Phil wouldn't have wanted any sort of personality cult developing.Also, while the current avatar shows the theatrical and dramatic "Raoul", its not really Phil as people knew him. He'd be urging us to do business as usual, minus the squabbling. He told me in his last PM how much he hated this. The best sign of respect we could show would be for the forum to be healthy in ten years time. That, he would approve of!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on January 15, 2013, 11:42:35 PM
The best sign of respect we could show would be for the forum to be healthy in ten years time. That, he would approve of!

 bjbjbjbjbj Agreed agagagagag
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on January 15, 2013, 11:46:09 PM
we should keep the current picture of Raoul F duke up for minimum of 6 months
I'm pretty sure Phil wouldn't have wanted any sort of personality cult developing.Also, while the current avatar shows the theatrical and dramatic "Raoul", its not really Phil as people knew him. He'd be urging us to do business as usual, minus the squabbling. He told me in his last PM how much he hated this. The best sign of respect we could show would be for the forum to be healthy in ten years time. That, he would approve of!

In yet another sign of the apocalypse, I find myself in total agreement with Gonzo. aoaoaoaoao

Please give the mods and admins a few days.  We promise that Raoul's memory will be well taken care of.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: fox on January 16, 2013, 03:47:01 AM
a decision best made by those who knew him personally methinks.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: The Local Dialect on January 16, 2013, 04:14:00 AM
we should keep the current picture of Raoul F duke up for minimum of 6 months
I'm pretty sure Phil wouldn't have wanted any sort of personality cult developing.Also, while the current avatar shows the theatrical and dramatic "Raoul", its not really Phil as people knew him. He'd be urging us to do business as usual, minus the squabbling. He told me in his last PM how much he hated this. The best sign of respect we could show would be for the forum to be healthy in ten years time. That, he would approve of!

I agree 100%. This place will always be "Raoul's" China Saloon, and it will be a memorial to him no matter what picture is on the front page. While this has been shocking and heartbreaking for us all, we need to try and keep the Saloon going as normally as possible. It is what he'd have wanted.

And, as EL said, the staff is working on a way to properly memorialize Raoul and I am sure you will all be pleased with the outcome. :)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on January 16, 2013, 09:14:07 AM
Agree. Raoul would not have wanted his ugly mug plastered on the front page for any length of time. On the other hand, Granny Mae would like to see other pics of Raoul, outside of fancy dress, but methinks they should be placed in The Memorial Garden. Post 'em if ya gots 'em! I will, but I gots to find them first.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Just Like Mr Benn on January 16, 2013, 09:20:37 AM
Agree. Raoul would not have wanted his ugly mug plastered on the front page for any length of time. On the other hand, Granny Mae would like to see other pics of Raoul, outside of fancy dress, but methinks they should be placed in The Memorial Garden. Post 'em if ya gots 'em! I will, but I gots to find them first.

I was able to put some slightly alarming faces to names by looking at the photos on the old site that someone posted a link to.

Many of them were of one of the annual Suzhou gatherings. I feel a bit like somone who was born too late to see The Beatles live; if 'seeing The Beatles Live' was a euphemism for weekends of excessive drinking with saloonies.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on January 16, 2013, 06:48:05 PM
Where did that link go? I can't find it!! llllllllll
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on January 16, 2013, 09:59:03 PM
Thanks George, It would be really special to see some photos of Raoul in the Memorial Garden.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on February 22, 2013, 03:30:00 AM
And our admin forgets to post the pic in the thread.  Some things never change. ahahahahah

(http://raoulschinasaloon.com/pics/john.jpg)

Mine is.  My wife measured it so she can brag to her friends about how great I am. afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on February 22, 2013, 04:45:59 AM

Mine is.  My wife measured it so she can brag to her friends about how great I am. afafafafaf


Using the metric system, it always sounds bigger.

This pic has to be a good joke. The grammar is too good for the interpretation to be so bad.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: yli on February 22, 2013, 11:44:10 AM
Mine is.  My wife measured it so she can brag to her friends about how great I am. afafafafaf

The feeling you get when a girl brags to all of her friends about the size of your schlong while you're in the room....
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on February 22, 2013, 09:31:16 PM
Take it from one who knows boys; "It's not the size of the dog in the fight, but the size of the fight in the dog". uuuuuuuuuu uuuuuuuuuu afafafafaf

I take it that this is probably intended for the male toilets to stop the "drips" on the seats. Yeah, you can take that either way. ahahahahah Wonder if there is something funny for the ladies loo?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: CaseyOrourke on March 05, 2013, 07:44:52 AM
One day we caught a taxi in Yanji.  Mrs. Casey sat up front, I sat in the back.  She was so completely pi$$ed off when we got to our destination, I was afraid I had done something.  It seems the driver had asked her who I was.  When learned I was the hubby, he had the audacity to ask her if it was true that westerner's dicks were really better at sastifying chinese women than Chinese dicks ever were.  Needless to say she wanted to slap him silly, but insted ignored his crudeness. I only shook my head in disgust, but told her she should have told him I had more enough to completely sastify her and still had enough to completely service three more women.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on March 05, 2013, 11:07:20 AM
Are you sure she wasn't angry because from her experience it is not true?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on March 05, 2013, 10:09:55 PM
Wonder if there is any way we could arrange an experiment? ahahahahah uuuuuuuuuu ahahahahah  I actually asked that question of a lady, with apparently a fair bit of experience in that area afafafafaf and she told me, that as a general rule, it is not true.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 06, 2013, 01:15:26 AM
Wonder if there is any way we could arrange an experiment? ahahahahah uuuuuuuuuu ahahahahah  I actually asked that question of a lady, with apparently a fair bit of experience in that area afafafafaf and she told me, that as a general rule, it is not true.

I volunteer to demonstrate how well I . . . measure up as well as how well I satisfy any ladies who wish to compare my skills against others.

I realize this could be an arduous task, but am willing to do it for the advancement of science.


Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on March 06, 2013, 10:43:23 PM
Thanks for the kind offer EL, but I was thinking more in terms of how the Chinese male "measures" up as a race of people. I've seen plenty of Anglo males, but don't know much about Asians; perhaps I should have nursed in China. uuuuuuuuuu The lady I spoke to in China claimed to have had plenty of experience in that area though. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cruisemonkey on March 08, 2013, 12:33:43 AM
Judging by any underwear I've bought in Asia, it's true. They may fit in the ass and the waist... but there's no room for the 'package' - it can be downright painful! 
asasasasas

Now, I know some 'smart ass' is going to tell me to stop buying women's underwear... but I assure you - these were for men.  ababababab
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: CaseyOrourke on March 08, 2013, 03:26:39 PM
Judging by any underwear I've bought in Asia, it's true. They may fit in the ass and the waist... but there's no room for the 'package' - it can be downright painful! 
asasasasas

Now, I know some 'smart ass' is going to tell me to stop buying women's underwear... but I assure you - these were for men.  ababababab

I had to buy some underwear in Yanji after my bags were left in Newark international one year. I had to get XXXXL (I wear L in the US), the brand on the box was "Fattie"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: CaseyOrourke on March 09, 2013, 07:08:22 AM
Judging by any underwear I've bought in Asia, it's true. They may fit in the ass and the waist... but there's no room for the 'package' - it can be downright painful! 
asasasasas

Now, I know some 'smart ass' is going to tell me to stop buying women's underwear... but I assure you - these were for men.  ababababab

I had to buy some underwear in Yanji after my bags were left in Newark international one year. I had to get XXXXL (I wear L in the US), the brand on the box was "Fattie"

Long John with a Ding-Dong
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on March 09, 2013, 06:58:02 PM
Speaking of knickers, The Babe brought me some back. They are made from wood!....the fabric is made from Birch fibre. Very comfortable, and so far, no splinters. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on March 09, 2013, 11:53:27 PM
It's about time you got a woody
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on March 10, 2013, 11:04:00 AM
Speaking of knickers, The Babe brought me some back. They are made from wood!....the fabric is made from Birch fibre. Very comfortable, and so far, no splinters. ahahahahah


How do you clean them?  In the washing machine?  Or with a piece of sand paper?




I really am curious....
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on March 10, 2013, 05:46:16 PM
Quote
How do you clean them?
I don't clean them....just a new coat of paint, and they're brilliant! ahahahahah ahahahahah

Quote
the fabric is made from Birch fibre
fabric = washing machine. Stuff these days is made from all kinds of other stuff....hemp...bamboo...birch trees, etc. Much better than plastic.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on March 11, 2013, 06:18:45 AM
just nobody light a match though
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on March 11, 2013, 03:04:13 PM
If you're lucky, its made from the same timber that Papa Geppetto used. This way, when you lie to the Babe, she'll be happy about it
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on March 11, 2013, 03:52:56 PM
 bkbkbkbkbk
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on March 11, 2013, 07:30:58 PM
Yes. Funny! ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: CaseyOrourke on March 18, 2013, 02:45:02 PM
I started thinking about the Ray Stevens song "Along came Jones"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vkiilenHpVQ
or an X-rated Treasure Island with "Long Dong Silver"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 27, 2013, 03:26:22 AM
Look what DS unearthed while digging through the ruins of the original Saloon.

(http://i51.photobucket.com/albums/f394/dragonsaver/Pictures%20for%20the%20Saloon/RaoulsBarRules2.jpg)

Rules to live by! agagagagag


Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on March 27, 2013, 05:48:12 AM
Serves them right for leaving
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: dragonsaver on March 27, 2013, 12:01:00 PM
 bkbkbkbkbk axaxaxaxax
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 28, 2013, 12:04:03 AM
Rule 2.  That thing in the corner is not a statue.  George just moves a little slowly due to being fossilized. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: CaseyOrourke on March 29, 2013, 08:13:14 AM
If you drink don't drive, do the watermelon crawl"

Read more: TRACY BYRD - WATERMELON CRAWL LYRICS



Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cruisemonkey on March 30, 2013, 04:16:06 AM
Please move you feet - you're standing on my hands.   :alcoholic:
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on April 13, 2013, 01:11:32 PM
I used to send my picks the Big Boss Man for this. May I ask who's handling it now? I'm going to need an email to send it to the person. Obviously send it to me via PM
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on April 13, 2013, 01:13:16 PM
Oh and by the way, please move your hands, you're tickling my feet
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on April 13, 2013, 06:05:36 PM
I used to send my picks the Big Boss Man for this. May I ask who's handling it now? I'm going to need an email to send it to the person. Obviously send it to me via PM

Dragonsaver akakakakak & Escaped Lunatic aoaoaoaoao are our HeadLiner Experts agagagagag
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on April 15, 2013, 10:16:54 AM
Changing it requires using one's forums passwords.  Since my browser remembers these far better than I do, I keep hoping DS will upload the next pic. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: dragonsaver on April 15, 2013, 01:57:53 PM
I plan on doing it.   bjbjbjbjbj  I just need some sage advice from our computer expert Noles

I am missing a step in the process to achieve success   llllllllll llllllllll
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on April 22, 2013, 02:02:21 PM
 :wtf:
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cruisemonkey on April 26, 2013, 08:08:25 PM
I plan on doing it.   bjbjbjbjbj  I just need some sage advice from our computer expert Noles

I am missing a step in the process to achieve success   llllllllll llllllllll

Hurry up! I've been trying to leave (and been tickling Day Dreamer's feet for over a month now).
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on April 26, 2013, 11:14:17 PM
hehehe  ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: dragonsaver on April 27, 2013, 02:32:20 AM
there is part of the program that I can't get into.  Noles has to fix it.  llllllllll llllllllll
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on April 27, 2013, 02:35:25 AM
there is part of the program that I can't get into.  Noles has to fix it.  llllllllll llllllllll

A thermo-nuclear bomb should do the trick.



Or a good dragon-fart
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Nolefan on April 27, 2013, 06:30:56 AM
fixed :-)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on May 28, 2013, 12:42:34 PM
This is going to save us millions of RMBs every year. The scooters are cheaply made in China, but the army boots are imported and they cost a fortune
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on May 28, 2013, 02:46:49 PM
Gotcha, right in the ass. Maybe we shouldn't be so close together
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on May 28, 2013, 10:48:33 PM
Following a number of serious accidents, foot horns will now be trialled on these military vehicles.


Given that many of these young soldiers have never driven a motor vehicle, it was decided that they should be issued with training wheels first.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on May 28, 2013, 10:52:26 PM
what happens when american style road rage meets chinese style traffic?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 28, 2013, 11:52:37 PM
(http://raoulschinasaloon.com/forumpic/military.jpg)

"We'll have the area secured in 2 hours."

"But sir, our batteries will only last another 30 minutes."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: roadwalker on May 29, 2013, 02:28:02 AM
Out-dated divisions such as "Cavalry" have been replaced with more modern, pragmatic ones, such as "Mall Cop Corps."  Every shopping center is a potential battlefield.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on May 29, 2013, 03:36:23 AM
Darth Vader has fallen so far.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 29, 2013, 06:32:18 AM
Combat Report:

Battle was going in our favor.  Enemy infantry units retreated.  Pursued with intent to capture or kill.  Pursuit ended when enemy successfully escaped by running up a stairway.

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: roadwalker on May 29, 2013, 07:09:54 AM
And then a new threat emerged:

(http://i.qkme.me/3rvvoc.jpg)

And a new type of soldier was needed....
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: old34 on May 29, 2013, 12:38:59 PM
In China, they'd be "gently/warmly reminded" not to drive their Hoverounds on the grass.

And EL nailed it on the effectiveness of these contraptions for control/pursuit. What happens when they encounter steps? Or just a curb? Or those ubiquitous fences and small gates in Chinese parks and "open spaces"?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on May 29, 2013, 01:03:44 PM

And EL nailed it on the effectiveness of these contraptions for control/pursuit. What happens when they encounter steps? Or just a curb? Or those ubiquitous fences and small gates in Chinese parks and "open spaces"?

There are no steps between the shuffleboard courts and the lunch buffets.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 30, 2013, 01:51:25 AM
And EL nailed it on the effectiveness of these contraptions for control/pursuit. What happens when they encounter steps? Or just a curb? Or those ubiquitous fences and small gates in Chinese parks and "open spaces"?

I believe your scenario would go something like this:  *THUD* *CRACK* "My arm!!!"  ananananan


Segways are actually great fun to play on.  I managed to hijack borrow one for a few minutes once.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on May 30, 2013, 06:55:35 AM
Back in the day, rifles were at least 3 feet long and jeeps had 4 wheels. This downsizing shit has affected the army too
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 30, 2013, 09:49:27 AM
Back in the day, rifles were at least 3 feet long and jeeps had 4 wheels. This downsizing shit has affected the army too

It's not downsizing, it's efficiency!  Wait until you see the unicycle special forces units in action. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on May 30, 2013, 10:57:15 AM
Back in the day, rifles were at least 3 feet long and jeeps had 4 wheels. This downsizing shit has affected the army too

It's not downsizing, it's efficiency!  Wait until you see the unicycle special forces units in action. ahahahahah


with pea shooters
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: CaseyOrourke on May 31, 2013, 04:39:16 AM
Overheard from the reviewing stand:

Xi Jingping: General Fang Fenghui, when you said the People's Army was adopting a  stealthy profile to counter the Americans, I was expecting something a little less obvious.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on June 02, 2013, 11:48:27 PM
Overheard from the reviewing stand:

Xi Jingping: General Fang Fenghui, when you said the People's Army was adopting a  stealthy profile to counter the Americans, I was expecting something a little less obvious.

But sir, our Stealth Segways have a smaller radar profile than anything the American Military has ever deployed.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Nolefan on June 24, 2013, 11:00:34 AM
(http://raoulschinasaloon.com/forumpic/nana.jpg)

I finally understand what they mean by food porn!
 bjbjbjbjbj
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cruisemonkey on June 24, 2013, 07:46:40 PM
If cabbage looked like that, I'd even eat kimchie.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on June 25, 2013, 01:08:59 AM
Eat your vegetables takes on a whole new meaning. afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on June 25, 2013, 01:43:06 AM
If cabbage looked like that, I'd even eat kimchie.

That is  Kim Qi
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on June 25, 2013, 02:31:56 AM

That is  Kim Qi

Daenerys Targaryen's first attempt.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on June 25, 2013, 02:38:30 AM
Is it just me, or does she look a little spicy? afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on June 25, 2013, 06:36:07 AM
and my brother wonders why I like Chinese food.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on June 25, 2013, 07:34:24 AM
She's enough to make me consider going vegetarian. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on June 25, 2013, 09:43:18 AM
So, what do you want for dessert?


More cabbage!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: adamsmith on June 25, 2013, 01:47:48 PM
anyone up for a cabbage roll
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on June 25, 2013, 03:17:46 PM
anyone up for a cabbage roll

Rather have a roll in the cabbage.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on June 25, 2013, 04:24:35 PM
anyone up for a cabbage roll

Rather have a roll in the cabbage.

and that's how you make Brussel sprouts
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on June 25, 2013, 10:16:58 PM
Leaf me alone!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on June 25, 2013, 11:54:47 PM
"Some Like It Hot"! bfbfbfbfbf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on June 26, 2013, 12:18:37 AM
A press release from the Ministry of Press Releases denies rumors that seductive cabbage girls are part of the first wave of an anti-animal revolution being launched by fruits and vegetables worldwide.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on June 26, 2013, 12:50:49 AM
Mama said "Eat your greens".  Mama knows best.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on June 26, 2013, 02:51:32 AM
She's part of a new band called Lettuce Entertain You. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: English Gent on June 26, 2013, 07:56:08 AM
hot enough to melt an iceberg....
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on June 26, 2013, 08:03:29 AM
She was like no other girl I'd ever met.  Her amazing green curves drew my eye even as her sparkling personality grew in my mind.  Our relationship quickly bloomed into a sizzling, spicy passion like no other.  I took her to my family's house for dinner.  Due to an unfortunate miscommunication regarding my intentions, my mother cooked her.

I'll always remember every moment with her, from the moment we first met until I swallowed the last bite.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: CaseyOrourke on June 26, 2013, 11:59:45 AM
This isn't your children's "Cabbage Patch Kid" here.... This one's for daddy.....
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on June 26, 2013, 12:01:48 PM
Is that a carrot in your pocket or are you just happy to eat meet me
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on June 26, 2013, 04:30:46 PM
I know its hot in there, but do you have to check for armpit odor in public?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on June 27, 2013, 11:24:36 AM
With a side order of...

cucumber?
kugua?
carrot?


broccoli?
You should get that seen to.




:(
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on June 27, 2013, 12:34:05 PM
All I know is that that cabbage is one hot tomato
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on July 01, 2013, 05:06:52 AM
If only she had a sister.

Oh wait!  She does! agagagagag

(http://juduoqi.com/pic/Susan.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on July 01, 2013, 05:44:56 AM
I've never know cabbage to take cheesecake pictures
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on July 01, 2013, 05:47:45 AM
I've never know cabbage to take cheesecake pictures

You don't hang out with the right cabbage.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on July 02, 2013, 04:46:20 AM
What if Chinese scientists managed to merge some of Marilyn Monroe's DNA into a Chinese cabbage?  I think the results would look something like this:

(http://juduoqi.com/pic/Mimi.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: dragonsaver on July 02, 2013, 12:53:17 PM
Wow  agagagagag agagagagag  That one is really great  bfbfbfbfbf agagagagag agagagagag
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on July 03, 2013, 12:45:06 AM
Great photos EL! bfbfbfbfbf At least you wouldn't have to worry about the blokes not eating their cabbage. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on July 03, 2013, 01:28:12 AM
Great photos EL! bfbfbfbfbf At least you wouldn't have to worry about the blokes not eating their cabbage. ahahahahah

If he starts posting pictures of carrots and cucumbers, I'm outta here!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on July 03, 2013, 07:59:14 AM
Great photos EL! bfbfbfbfbf At least you wouldn't have to worry about the blokes not eating their cabbage. ahahahahah

If he starts posting pictures of carrots and cucumbers, I'm outta here!

I'm saving those for next week. uuuuuuuuuu

(http://juduoqi.com/pic/An.jpg)

If only Ju Duoqi would do another fantasy cabbage series. akakakakak
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: English Gent on July 24, 2013, 05:24:03 AM
....and wife in boot.  bjbjbjbjbj
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on July 24, 2013, 09:22:14 AM
...and drunk off his tits.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: roadwalker on July 24, 2013, 05:48:39 PM
(http://raoulschinasaloon.com/forumpic/babay.jpg)

My parents could have used this sign a couple of times in the old "throw the young'uns in the back" era of car safety.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on July 24, 2013, 08:35:24 PM
Credit please!! ababababab ababababab
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on July 24, 2013, 11:09:28 PM
Watch out for dirty nappies!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on July 25, 2013, 12:34:15 AM
The initial test run of mobile organic speed bumps only slowed down cars slightly.  Slight older children who are overweight will be used in the next test.

Credit please!! ababababab ababababab

Credit (or blame) for this one goes to Day Dreamer.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on July 25, 2013, 01:40:58 AM
Quote
Credit (or blame) for this one goes to Day Dreamer.
asasasasas asasasasas asasasasas asasasasas asasasasas asasasasas asasasasas asasasasas
Blatant plagiarism!!! I posted this on June 8, 2010!!
http://raoulschinasaloon.com/index.php?topic=169.105 (http://raoulschinasaloon.com/index.php?topic=169.105)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on July 25, 2013, 04:08:43 AM
I recommend that you and DD have a duel.  Each of you gets a basket of mackerel.  Stand back to back, walk 5 paces, turn and fire.

Oh, and cool pic!  Thanks to DD George. agagagagag
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on July 25, 2013, 05:57:20 AM
Where did D-bloody-D find it???
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on July 25, 2013, 10:38:37 AM
I have a bunch of them, some copied, some my own. I even have one on a motorcycle that says "Baby in Car"

The truth is when I sent EL a bunch of pics, I didn't discern which were mine or copies. I won't deny it might be George's, I just don't remember any more I have so many. Next time I'll send pics with me in them

Regardless, this pic is wrong. Usually the baby is in the front in the driver's lap

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on July 25, 2013, 10:39:42 AM
Where did D-bloody-D find it???

Don't swear at me please
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on July 25, 2013, 08:31:50 PM
I wasn't swearing at you DD, because I'm not upset...just curious. If my pics are floating around the Internet, I'd like to find out where they are.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: gonzo on July 25, 2013, 09:56:33 PM
These annoying Baby on Board signs are at plague proportions in Australia. What do they want us to do? Sing a lullaby as we drive past? aaaaaaaaaa
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: dragonsaver on July 25, 2013, 10:52:29 PM
Actually, the original purpose of the signs was to alert paramedics and emergency workers that there was a child in the car.  This would help prevent a child from being left in a car that was in an accident.   aoaoaoaoao  Or worst case scenario if the car seat was thrown from the car and the kid was in the bushes etc.  (that has actually happened in an accident)  aoaoaoaoao

However, the sign should really be removable and only put on car when the child was actually in the car. 
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on July 26, 2013, 06:22:39 AM
Even the easily removable ones are almost never removed.  Either that or a lot more people just permanently leave those kids in the car while they are at work, shopping, and all night.  This, plus the requirement for big, obvious baby seats in many countries renders the original purpose of those signs pointless.

I'd love to see someone get charged for the resources wasted checking around an accident scene for a baby that was safely at home the whole time.


Don't swear at me please

That's not what you said last night.  afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on July 27, 2013, 12:15:58 AM
These were everywhere in the U.S. in the '80's.  Even made an appearance in "Forrest Gump". I thought it was telling the other drivers to avoid hitting this car and swerve into the one driven by the old geezers.

I assume that in China since babies are more plentiful than safety cones their using them to mark potholes.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on July 27, 2013, 02:14:39 AM
Excessive demand for daycare space has lead some cities to use creative measures.

These were everywhere in the U.S. in the '80's.  Even made an appearance in "Forrest Gump". I thought it was telling the other drivers to avoid hitting this car and swerve into the one driven by the old geezers.

Single person with no dependents in car - please feel free to crash into me!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Nolefan on August 20, 2013, 06:23:48 AM
and we're on!!!
(http://raoulschinasaloon.com/forumpic/wecare.jpg)

let me hear them..
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: piglet on August 20, 2013, 06:25:16 AM
Thanks for changing! This is a good one.
If you do jump in please cover yourself in Nestle Chocolate spread.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: English Gent on August 20, 2013, 06:31:29 AM
Any persons that are eaten, then found to cause the animals an upset stomach will have charges brought upon their estate. Thank you.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on August 20, 2013, 11:44:48 AM
And charged with cruelty to animals
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on August 20, 2013, 11:48:10 AM
Do not stand, sit climb or lean on zoo fences


Except the fat kids. Yea fatso, you go ahead and come closer
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on August 20, 2013, 02:36:37 PM
Seems like a totally reasonable sign to me.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 20, 2013, 11:44:22 PM
Because "Torn to pieces, eaten, and vomited up" would look very bad on your tombstone. kkkkkkkkkk
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on August 21, 2013, 02:07:58 AM
good one, noles

famous last words: "Don't worry, I know what I'm doing"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 21, 2013, 02:23:09 AM
famous last words: "Don't worry, I know what I'm doing"

Sign?  Who care's about the sign.  Hey ya'll, watch this!  Ooops! (thud) Ouch!  How do I get out of here?  Oh, nice panda.  Come here and I'll scra...  What the hell!  It bit me!  Help!  HELP!!!  AAAIIIEEE!!!!!  (nom nom nom)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 23, 2013, 05:17:09 AM
After the lions learned of the enormous power of reverse psychology on weaker minds, they quickly made signs that assured them of an unending supply of stupid humans to eat.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 11, 2013, 11:23:40 AM
(http://raoulschinasaloon.com/forumpic/chicken.jpg)

Hey George!  Can you make this one dance? ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: adamsmith on September 11, 2013, 01:10:14 PM
new product for the chinese market. Just look at all those yummy feet
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on September 11, 2013, 06:02:35 PM
"I'm not tip-toeing through any fricken tulips!"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 11, 2013, 11:22:54 PM
Kentucky Freak Chicken
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on September 12, 2013, 02:57:41 AM
I'm also not doing the Hokey-Pokey
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: roadwalker on September 12, 2013, 05:01:17 AM
Wow, that's some feat!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on September 12, 2013, 05:22:57 AM
Nobody here but us chicken.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on September 12, 2013, 05:34:23 AM
I got to stop eating centipedes!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: adamsmith on September 12, 2013, 06:45:49 AM
ELs cloning experiments gone bad. uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 13, 2013, 04:56:58 AM
Chickenzilla tramples downtown Tokyo much more efficiently than Godzilla.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 17, 2013, 04:58:04 AM
COMPANYYYYY MARCH!

Left 1
Left 2
Left 3
Left 4
Right 1
Right 2
Right 3
Right 4
Left 5
Left 6
Left 7
Left 8
Right 5
Right 6
Right 7
Right 8
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on September 30, 2013, 02:17:31 AM
Put your best feet forward. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on September 30, 2013, 06:41:10 AM
Damn, this is the country that likes to eat chicken feet
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: fox on September 30, 2013, 11:40:45 AM
Three Legged Chicken

    A man was driving along a rural road one day when he saw a three legged chicken running down the road. He was amused enough to drive along side it for a while, as he was driving he noticed the chicken was running 30 mph.

    Pretty fast chicken, he thought, I wonder just how fast it can run. So he sped up and the chicken did too! They were now moving along the road at 45 mph!

    The man in the car sped up again, to his surprise the chicken was still running ahead of him at 60 mph!!!

    Suddenly the chicken turned off the road and ran down a long driveway leading to a farmhouse. The man followed the chicken to the house and saw a man in the yard with dozens of three legged chickens. The man in the car called out to the farmer "How did you get all these three legged chickens?"

    The farmer replied, "I breed 'em. Ya see it's me, my wife and my son living here and we all like to eat the chicken leg. Since a chicken only has two legs, I started breeding this three legged variety so we could all eat our favorite piece."

    "That's amazing!" said the driver "How do they taste?"

    "Don't rightly know, I ain't caught one yet!"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 06, 2013, 02:12:59 AM
That's twenty small steps for a chicken, one giant leap for all chicken-kind.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on October 13, 2013, 05:49:09 AM
And now you know why they call it a cup
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on October 13, 2013, 08:58:49 AM
Hey, Mr Tambourmannequin, play a song for me.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Canadapanda on October 13, 2013, 03:35:09 PM
I'll wok your world~
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on October 13, 2013, 10:13:59 PM
Of course I look upset, how else would you expect me to look?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 14, 2013, 05:25:58 AM
Noles forgot to add the pic to the thread:

(http://raoulschinasaloon.com/forumpic/mannekin.jpg)

Who the hell are you?

Name's Ash.  Housewares.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: CaseyOrourke on October 14, 2013, 01:16:13 PM
I'll wok your world~

I was thinking more along the lines of the Raiders of the Lost Wok
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 15, 2013, 01:01:07 AM
Stainless Steel Kitchenware Man makes Iron Man look like a wuss.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 16, 2013, 09:05:22 AM
The use of magnets in Chinese Traditional Medicine can have unforeseen side effects.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on October 18, 2013, 04:56:29 AM
who would have thought he needed such a big platter to cover his groin, and such small bowls for his knees?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 18, 2013, 05:20:10 AM
If you think the new Tin Man is lame, you should see how bad they did with the Scarecrow and the Cowardly Lion. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on October 18, 2013, 06:57:00 AM
Hey doc, there's far too much iron in my diet, look at these brutal pimples
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 21, 2013, 02:15:01 AM
Tonight's challenger takes the whole Iron Chef concept very seriously.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on October 23, 2013, 01:50:19 AM
Movie sequel; "Edward Spatula-hands"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: CaseyOrourke on October 23, 2013, 12:58:32 PM
is that a codpiece on your belt, or you just glad to see the girls?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 24, 2013, 03:14:47 AM
The kitchen god demands sacrifices!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on October 24, 2013, 11:57:49 AM
This armour is good stuff but it's making my compass spin like a top
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 25, 2013, 02:52:11 AM
Kill the wabbit!!!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 26, 2013, 03:55:37 AM
Kitchenware + superglue + alcohol = guaranteed bad outcome.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on October 26, 2013, 06:43:41 AM
Kitchenware + superglue + alcohol = guaranteed bad outcome.


Kitchenware + superglue + alcohol = safe kitchen sex
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on October 26, 2013, 03:20:58 PM
Introducing the Asian Portable One Man Steel Drum Band


edited: Shouldn't be Trinidadian
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on October 26, 2013, 11:25:58 PM
"Don't even ask where they have shoved that extra fire extinguisher!"  bibibibibi
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 28, 2013, 06:11:46 AM
"Don't even ask where they have shoved that extra fire extinguisher!"  bibibibibi

Kitchenware + superglue + alcohol + fire extinguisher + Granny Mae = aoaoaoaoao aoaoaoaoao aoaoaoaoao aoaoaoaoao aoaoaoaoao
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on October 30, 2013, 09:11:04 AM
Yes ma'am, that is a 9" pan and I can prove it   afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 31, 2013, 03:52:49 AM
(http://raoulschinasaloon.com/forumpic/raoul10.jpg)

YYYYAAAAYYYY!!!!
jjjjjjjjjj jjjjjjjjjj jjjjjjjjjj jjjjjjjjjj jjjjjjjjjj jjjjjjjjjj jjjjjjjjjj jjjjjjjjjj

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Canadapanda on October 31, 2013, 01:17:29 PM
10 years of liver-failure-inducing fake imported booze
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on October 31, 2013, 01:49:38 PM
If we had any real relent, we could have done it in 3
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Nolefan on December 09, 2013, 09:45:36 AM
here we go....

(http://raoulschinasaloon.com/forumpic/yelling.jpg)

For when others can't understand you anymore
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Tree on December 09, 2013, 10:08:16 AM
Anesthesia?

Just count backwards from mind-shattering pain.


Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: china-matt on December 09, 2013, 02:56:12 PM
That is the most appropriate name for a student dental clinic.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on December 10, 2013, 12:45:19 AM
Just relax.  This won't hurt at all. uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: English Gent on December 10, 2013, 03:06:05 AM
(whispers to the assistant mid way through the screams and blood of the inspection).... i think we need the other drill, go and get the big one. it says black&decker on it.....
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: piglet on December 10, 2013, 08:38:19 AM
I actually had a real dentist called Dr Screech back in the UK.Funny I never felt comfortable there...
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: roadwalker on December 10, 2013, 12:34:40 PM
Yelling, but no screaming aloud.  (Screaming hurts Dr. Payne's fillings.)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on December 11, 2013, 12:21:12 AM
I'm sorry, Doctor Payne is booked solid this week.  Dr. Blood has an opening tomorrow at 2 pm.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on December 20, 2013, 05:21:37 AM
(http://raoulschinasaloon.com/forumpic/police.jpg)

Have all the police in your town gone missing?  If so, just dial the police at 110 and a friendly officer will be dispatched to investiga . . . oh wait. bibibibibi
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on December 21, 2013, 01:27:10 AM
Traditionally, at this time of year, Raoul would delete alternative headings for Our Lady of China.

(http://farm6.staticflickr.com/5247/5315212627_32d9e08aef_z.jpg)

And every year I would forget and make jokes anyway.  agagagagag
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on December 21, 2013, 01:42:38 AM
There's a sign you'll never see in a donut shop
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: piglet on December 23, 2013, 12:51:11 AM
And by the way is that Arabic at the top of the missing police sign? And if so does that means it comes from Xinjiang? Just curious! bjbjbjbjbj
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on December 23, 2013, 01:07:54 AM
And by the way is that Arabic at the top of the missing police sign? And if so does that means it comes from Xinjiang? Just curious! bjbjbjbjbj

That may explain things  ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on December 23, 2013, 01:28:23 AM
In light of the recent trend of missing police officers, the Sanlu Milk Corporation will be putting their pictures on cartons of our fine dairy products.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on December 23, 2013, 03:45:56 AM
And by the way is that Arabic at the top of the missing police sign? And if so does that means it comes from Xinjiang? Just curious! bjbjbjbjbj

Could be but not necessarily. It would mean there are pockets of Arabic speakers in this area though. I've seen Arabic on signs in Xi'an and Yiwu before and I would think Gansu would have too. In my area there in an eastern suburb of Changsha, all signs have Korean while Changsha proper does not.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on December 23, 2013, 12:56:28 PM
Recruits must present their "Neighbourhood Hide-n-Seek Championship" certificate to apply
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Nolefan on December 24, 2013, 05:20:43 AM
Indeed indeed... and we respect traditions in the saloon, including making sure that there's nut cigarette butts on the floor to scrape George's knees  ababababab

Best wishes y'all and like it it says up there, pay up!!!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on December 24, 2013, 05:49:13 AM
yes, indeedy! Merry Xmas to allabodies. agagagagag agagagagag agagagagag agagagagag
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on December 24, 2013, 06:48:08 AM
A Merry Ho Ho to all - I hope you got want you needed and what you wanted
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: The Local Dialect on December 24, 2013, 01:55:25 PM
And by the way is that Arabic at the top of the missing police sign? And if so does that means it comes from Xinjiang? Just curious! bjbjbjbjbj

Could be but not necessarily. It would mean there are pockets of Arabic speakers in this area though. I've seen Arabic on signs in Xi'an and Yiwu before and I would think Gansu would have too. In my area there in an eastern suburb of Changsha, all signs have Korean while Changsha proper does not.

While Stil is right, that particular sign is actually in Xinjiang. It says at the bottom there -- Hetian city (which is also known as Hotan).

Merry Christmas everyone!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: George on December 24, 2013, 07:24:33 PM
Just unleashing a bit of Grinch.....Who put 2 "L's" in Holiday? Was it Billie?? ahahahahah ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on December 24, 2013, 10:55:55 PM
Merry Christmas everybody! agagagagag I hope that your Christmas day is very special. bfbfbfbfbf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on December 25, 2013, 12:29:11 AM
Indeed indeed... and we respect traditions in the saloon, including making sure that there's nut cigarette butts on the floor to scrape George's knees  ababababab

Best wishes y'all and like it it says up there, pay up!!!

If George would pay his bar tab, we'd have enough money to build a new Saloon on Hainan. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on January 15, 2014, 03:38:27 PM
time for a change folks
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Nolefan on January 16, 2014, 02:17:48 AM
time for a change folks

asketh and thou shelleth receiveth  bjbjbjbjbj
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on January 16, 2014, 03:05:48 AM
time for a change folks

asketh and thou shelleth receiveth  bjbjbjbjbj


I want a tall blonde with big boobs   ababababab
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Nolefan on January 16, 2014, 04:10:56 AM

I want a tall blonde with big boobs   ababababab

Here you go cheexyblonde
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on January 16, 2014, 04:31:47 AM
(http://raoulschinasaloon.com/forumpic/evolution.jpg)

Photo of Noles after he spent too long enjoying the fresh air in Beijing. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on January 16, 2014, 09:08:34 AM
Do not invite this guy if we're going to do lines tonight
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on January 16, 2014, 09:09:39 AM

I want a tall blonde with big boobs   ababababab

Here you go cheexyblonde


 bibibibibi
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on January 16, 2014, 09:35:08 AM
Always check your plastic surgeon's credentials (and sobriety) before getting a nose job. yyyyyyyyyy
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on January 16, 2014, 06:05:23 PM
Quote
I want a tall blonde with big boobs
My wife says you can't have me
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on January 16, 2014, 10:22:25 PM
"Heaven only nose". bfbfbfbfbf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on January 16, 2014, 10:34:17 PM
Quote
I want a tall blonde with big boobs
My wife says you can't have me

My wife says I can't have you too
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on January 16, 2014, 11:41:56 PM
With the new Forehead Nose, sneezing your brains out has never been easier.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on January 17, 2014, 12:37:04 AM
how's he going to get his fingers in there?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: gonzo on January 17, 2014, 12:38:07 AM
I'd be interested to know the story behind this.
Who knows?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Just Like Mr Benn on January 17, 2014, 04:43:40 AM
I'd be interested to know the story behind this.
Who knows?

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/asia/xiaolian-chinese-man-grows-new-nose-for-transplant-on-his-forehead-8840974.html
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: NATO on January 17, 2014, 05:06:56 AM
I'd be interested to know the story behind this.
Who knows?

Nobody nose.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on January 17, 2014, 05:07:34 AM
Don't ruin perfectly good wild speculation by revealing the backstory so early. asasasasas



With the new Forehead Nose, there's 37% less neck strain putting your nose to the grindstone.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: NATO on January 17, 2014, 05:08:33 AM
"He's always turning his nose up at things."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on January 17, 2014, 06:07:42 AM
Dude could commit suicide by wearing a hat.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on January 17, 2014, 07:00:35 AM
Does anybody remember the lead singer from "Sniff and the Tears"?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on January 17, 2014, 07:16:44 AM
Study study grindstone, nose nose up.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on January 17, 2014, 11:20:18 AM
If a big nose means a big c*ck, I don't want to see this guy's junk  kkkkkkkkkk kkkkkkkkkk kkkkkkkkkk
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on January 17, 2014, 11:31:39 AM
Not too long ago there was a true story of a worker who had his hand severed. The damage to the hand itself was actually minor, it was a clean cut. But his wrist needed time before the hand could have been reattached. So, how do you keep the limb from atrophying? Easy, graft it to the guys ankle where his own system maintains circulation and whatnot. In time when his wrist is ready, the hand can be returned to its rightful place.

Let's hope it won't be sewn on backwards!  Apparently many doctors from around came to see the freak procedure. Too lazy to look, but it was in China Daily
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on January 17, 2014, 11:19:45 PM
If a big nose means a big c*ck, I don't want to see this guy's junk  kkkkkkkkkk kkkkkkkkkk kkkkkkkkkk
Damn! and all this time I have been looking at the length of the fingers. bibibibibi
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on January 18, 2014, 06:57:02 AM
Two plastic surgery students compare notes after their final exams.

"Wait, they go in the middle? AW MAN! I TOTALLY BLEW THAT NOSE!"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Tree on January 18, 2014, 01:26:45 PM
Two more places to hold bottle rockets!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on January 18, 2014, 01:49:31 PM
You can pick your friends and you can pick your nose

AND NOWWWWWWWWWWW,

you caaaaan   pick your friend's nose
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on January 20, 2014, 06:33:27 AM
Another sign of the impending apocalypse, as foretold by Nostrildamus. ahahahahah

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: AMonk on January 20, 2014, 09:29:40 AM
Disdainful = scornful = stuck up = keep one's nose in the air
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on January 20, 2014, 11:01:46 AM
Putting his nose into a witch's business had unfortunate consequences.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on January 21, 2014, 07:44:14 AM
Crazy English, enjoy losing your face, a survivor's story.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on January 22, 2014, 12:52:07 AM
Don't get your nose out of joint.

Crazy English, enjoy losing your face, a survivor's story.

Looks more like gaining face to me. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: gonzo on January 24, 2014, 01:51:46 AM
Can we get a new avatar? I feel like throwing up every time I see this one.
How about a girl? With big boobs? And Chinese, to boot.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: ericthered on January 24, 2014, 01:55:44 AM
Yeah, Gonzo is right. Could we get a cheerier avatar for Spring Festival?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on January 24, 2014, 02:17:20 AM
(http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2014/01/21/article-2543294-1AD8C33A00000578-848_634x459.jpg)

Better?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on January 24, 2014, 05:00:51 AM
Can we get a new avatar? I feel like throwing up every time I see this one.
How about a girl? With big boobs? And Chinese, to boot.

You want to boot a big bobbed Chinese girl   mmmmmmmmmm

You sir, have issues
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on January 24, 2014, 05:21:11 AM
(http://raoulschinasaloon.com/forumpic/evolution.jpg)




You don't want to know where they put the ear


 :lickass:
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: old34 on January 24, 2014, 11:16:29 AM
Agree with gonzo and etr. It's annoying, and has overstayed it's "sell-by" date for "nose" comments.

Next.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: NATO on January 26, 2014, 07:52:01 AM
Also agreed.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Nolefan on January 26, 2014, 08:27:11 PM
Can we get a new avatar? I feel like throwing up every time I see this one.
How about a girl? With big boobs? And Chinese, to boot.

Sorry y'all. I'm away without my computer so can't upload stuff. I'll see if any of the other mods can do it
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on February 05, 2014, 07:59:34 AM
When people see this guy, do they exclaim "Oh Snot!"?  ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Nolefan on February 07, 2014, 03:47:29 AM
back in town with full access...
Here you go:

(http://raoulschinasaloon.com/forumpic/cats.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on February 07, 2014, 04:07:05 AM
All hail Chairman Meow! agagagagag
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on February 07, 2014, 04:18:03 AM
See cats.

(http://img.gawkerassets.com/img/19eueegpmr7u4png/ku-xlarge.png)

Lose mind.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on February 07, 2014, 04:22:01 AM
Netizens unimpressed

(http://img.gawkerassets.com/img/19eueeknpwliqpng/ku-xlarge.png)

Suspicious

(http://img.gawkerassets.com/img/19eueegpkys6bpng/ku-xlarge.png)

Hopeful.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on February 07, 2014, 05:07:00 AM
Breaking News!  China is secretly run by a cat cult!  The proof is on the 100 RMB notes.  Check them yourself if you don't believe it.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on February 07, 2014, 05:26:34 AM
Catalyst roader
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on February 07, 2014, 05:41:09 AM
It's cats. Soylent RMB is made out of cats. They're making our money out of cats. Next thing they'll be breeding them like cattle for money. You've gotta tell them. You've gotta tell them!
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on February 07, 2014, 08:27:14 AM
(http://img.gawkerassets.com/img/19euzrmxj9lxfjpg/ku-xlarge.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on February 07, 2014, 09:02:53 AM
It's cats. Soylent RMB is made out of cats. They're making our money out of cats. Next thing they'll be breeding them like cattle for money. You've gotta tell them. You've gotta tell them!


Breeding them is a cinch, herding them on the other hand  kkkkkkkkkk
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on February 07, 2014, 11:15:42 PM
Nice work Calach. bfbfbfbfbf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Tree on February 09, 2014, 05:05:17 AM
Toxiplasmosis: Middle Kingdom style
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on February 10, 2014, 05:51:30 AM
"Revolution"
Writer(s): Paul Mccartney, John Lennon
Copyright: Sony/ATV Tunes LLC



You say you want a revolution
Well you know
We all want to change the world
You tell me that it's evolution
Well you know
We all want to change the world
But when you talk about destruction
Don't you know you can count me out

Don't you know it's gonna be alright
Alright, alright

You say you got a real solution
Well you know
We don't love to see the plan
You ask me for a contribution
Well you know
We're doing what we can
But if you want money for people with minds that hate
All I can tell you is brother you have to wait

Don't you know it's gonna be alright
Alright, alright, al...

You say you'll change the constitution
Well you know
We all want to change your head
You tell me it's the institution
Well you know
You better free your mind instead
But if you go carrying pictures of Chairman Mao
You ain't going to make it with anyone anyhow


Don't you know know it's gonna be alright
Alright, alright

Alright, alright
Alright, alright
Alright, alright
Alright, alright
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on February 10, 2014, 08:16:35 AM
I hate to point out any errors by my favorite band, but I do believe the Chairman was successful enough to end up with his face on a lot more money than the Fab 4.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on February 10, 2014, 11:56:31 AM
I hate to point out any errors by my favorite band, but I do believe the Chairman was successful enough to end up with his face on a lot more money than the Fab 4.


But The Beatles never worshipped cats
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on February 10, 2014, 12:10:40 PM
orly?

(http://images5.fanpop.com/image/photos/26100000/The-Beatles-with-cats-the-beatles-26185824-300-300.jpg)
(http://images5.fanpop.com/image/photos/26100000/The-Beatles-with-cats-the-beatles-26185824-300-300.jpg)

cats
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on February 10, 2014, 12:41:09 PM
I hate to point out any errors by my favorite band, but I do believe the Chairman was successful enough to end up with his face on a lot more money than the Fab 4.


Forgot to add, I carry pictures of Chairman Mao and I am making it with somebody (anyhow)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on February 10, 2014, 12:42:03 PM
orly?

(http://images5.fanpop.com/image/photos/26100000/The-Beatles-with-cats-the-beatles-26185824-300-300.jpg)
(http://images5.fanpop.com/image/photos/26100000/The-Beatles-with-cats-the-beatles-26185824-300-300.jpg)

cats

bastard
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on February 10, 2014, 12:43:32 PM
Furthermore...

http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XMzY3NjA3NTcy.html?s=109574


u better leave their kitten alone.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on February 10, 2014, 11:54:56 PM
How come every time I pull out a 100 RMB note, I have an urge to buy things for cats?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: xwarrior on February 21, 2014, 12:29:06 AM
How come every time I pull out a 100 RMB note, I have an urge to buy things for cats?

It is nothing to worry about. Every time I am given a 100RMB note I go looking for a pussy.

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on February 21, 2014, 12:37:26 AM
(http://raoulschinasaloon.com/forumpic/maintenance.jpg)

Chinese traffic sign meaning "Honk Louder!"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on February 21, 2014, 07:10:23 AM
Corruption ahead for the next 8 kilometres
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on February 21, 2014, 08:36:45 AM
Caution:  BS shovelers ahead.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on February 22, 2014, 01:42:30 AM
Caution: Lazy picketer, won't even pick up his sign
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on February 24, 2014, 08:15:38 AM
Must be from the local gov't. It says "in the next 24h" and that was a week ago. It should be finished by mid-March    uuuuuuuuuu
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on February 28, 2014, 04:55:56 AM
Relax.  He didn't say which "next 24 hours" the upgrade would happen in. agagagagag
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Nolefan on February 28, 2014, 10:26:11 AM
Must be from the local gov't. It says "in the next 24h" and that was a week ago. It should be finished by mid-March    uuuuuuuuuu

it's all about the relativity theory...  agagagagag
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on February 28, 2014, 01:30:52 PM
Must be from the local gov't. It says "in the next 24h" and that was a week ago. It should be finished by mid-March    uuuuuuuuuu

it's all about the relativity theory...  agagagagag

literally
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 03, 2014, 02:55:51 AM
Noles been working on the upgrade
All the live-long day.
Noles been working on the upgrade
Just to pass the time away.
 agagagagag
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on March 03, 2014, 01:30:42 PM
Must be from the local gov't. It says "in the next 24h" and that was a week ago. It should be finished by mid-March    uuuuuuuuuu

Mid March is a week away. Maybe he's shooting for an Ides of March theme avatar




The response is "Et tu?"
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 04, 2014, 11:49:23 PM
Must be from the local gov't. It says "in the next 24h" and that was a week ago. It should be finished by mid-March    uuuuuuuuuu

Mid March is a week away. Maybe he's shooting for an Ides of March theme avatar


The response is "Et tu?"

Beware the Ides of Noles. aoaoaoaoao
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on March 12, 2014, 05:01:36 AM
New avatar, I hope that's not the route the pilot of MH370 took   bibibibibi
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 12, 2014, 09:57:41 AM
(http://raoulschinasaloon.com/forumpic/hole.jpg)

It started with interconnecting regional subways in China.  Then things got a little out of hand.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on March 12, 2014, 10:57:08 AM
That's one hell of a transfer point
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: latefordinner on March 12, 2014, 11:46:36 AM
The infrastructure may be somewhat lacking, but its paved with good intentions
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 12, 2014, 11:48:40 PM
How did I get here?  I was just walking down the street, minding my own business, and I accidentally fell down a hole. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on March 13, 2014, 07:47:09 AM
"Oh Dear. Oh Dear.  I shall be too late."
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 14, 2014, 03:14:25 AM
My mother warned me that if I chased rabbits I could end up in some very strange places. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on March 14, 2014, 04:56:43 AM
It's a good thing we don't live on a Jupiter sized planet, China-140,000km. That could take a while
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 18, 2014, 12:12:30 AM
At last, a shortcut for my evening commute.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 18, 2014, 11:32:25 AM
(http://raoulschinasaloon.com/forumpic/comingsoon.jpg)

Be afraid.  Be very afraid. aoaoaoaoao aoaoaoaoao aoaoaoaoao

Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on March 18, 2014, 11:54:50 AM
I'm waiting for a V.8
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on March 19, 2014, 09:41:10 AM
Will V.4 correct typos or better yet, censor EL?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Nolefan on March 19, 2014, 10:32:47 AM
Will V.4 correct typos or better yet, censor EL?

i wish... however, it will allow you to take the typos and EL to private places and lay the smack down on them  aoaoaoaoao :wtf:
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 20, 2014, 03:30:24 AM
So DD and I will have out own private place to get naked and spank each other discuss serious issues related to misspellings?
 cbcbcbcbcb cbcbcbcbcb cbcbcbcbcb

That's great!  We used to have to rent hotel rooms for that sort of thing. afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on March 20, 2014, 03:44:10 AM
i wish... however, it will allow you to take the typos and EL to private places and lay the smack down on them  aoaoaoaoao :wtf:


So DD and I will have out own private place to get naked and spank each other discuss serious issues related to misspellings?


That's great!  We used to have to rent hotel rooms for that sort of thing.


kkkkkkkkkk   kkkkkkkkkk   kkkkkkkkkk   kkkkkkkkkk   kkkkkkkkkk



kkkkkkkkkk   kkkkkkkkkk    kkkkkkkkkk
I'm weird, I'm not that demented or twisted  kkkkkkkkkk- kkkkkkkkkk count me out  
kkkkkkkkkk   kkkkkkkkkk   kkkkkkkkkk



 kkkkkkkkkk   kkkkkkkkkk   kkkkkkkkkk   kkkkkkkkkk   kkkkkkkkkk
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 20, 2014, 03:55:05 AM
Oh, that's right.  We're not supposed to talk about our special meetings in public.  People might get jealous.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Stil on March 20, 2014, 05:33:31 AM
Oh, that's right.  We're not supposed to talk about our special meetings in public.  People might get jealous.


Keeps us from knowing where to plant the bomb.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on March 20, 2014, 06:17:31 AM
Really off topic, but if El and I ever have any " special meetings in public" as he described, I'm telling you were to plant that bomb
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on March 20, 2014, 06:32:51 AM
Oh, that's right.  We're not supposed to talk about our special meetings in public.  People might get jealous.


Keeps us from knowing where to plant the bomb.

See.  I told you people would get jealous. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on April 02, 2014, 06:42:16 AM
 ananananan


Where's our avatar?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on April 03, 2014, 12:10:11 AM
Give Noles a little more time.  He's still trying to figure out how to dim the lights and lower the window shades.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Day Dreamer on April 04, 2014, 02:00:55 AM
Give Noles a little more time.  He's still trying to figure out how to dim the lights and lower the window shades.

So our next avatar is going to be dim and shady? 
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on April 07, 2014, 02:33:50 AM
Give Noles a little more time.  He's still trying to figure out how to dim the lights and lower the window shades.

So our next avatar is going to be dim and shady?

Isn't it always that way?  ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on September 03, 2014, 08:29:38 AM
(http://www.weirdhut.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/chinese-tiger-dog-550x410.jpg)

http://www.weirdhut.com/animals/bizzare-pet-trends-in-china/
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on September 03, 2014, 11:54:16 PM
I find that very sad. It seems to be more about the owners needs, rather than the animal's. Thanks for that Calach; it has to be seen to be believed.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Con ate dog on October 06, 2014, 12:42:06 PM
That is why pets aren't allowed in the zoo.  afafafafaf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 06, 2014, 07:35:22 AM
I find that very sad. It seems to be more about the owners needs, rather than the animal's. Thanks for that Calach; it has to be seen to be believed.

The tiger dog looks not only healthy, but also happy.  The panda dogs don't look too annoyed.  I'd be a bit worried about how the made the lion dogs - shaving large areas of a dog's coat can sometimes have bad effects.

As long as the dyes used aren't toxic, I don't see this as any worse than dressing a dog up in a silly costume.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on November 06, 2014, 10:40:57 PM
As long as the dyes used aren't toxic, I don't see this as any worse than dressing a dog up in a silly costume.

I think that is sad too EL.  I can't believe that an animal, particularly a dog, enjoys being dressed up. bibibibibi  Again, I believe that it tells one a lot about the owner. bfbfbfbfbf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on November 06, 2014, 11:38:16 PM
I think most dogs enjoy it.  They wait until the owner turns away, start gnawing on the costume, and get the most entertaining reaction when the owner notices. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on May 01, 2015, 09:21:41 AM
(http://i115.photobucket.com/albums/n313/escapedlunatic/Silly%20Photos/BoxHeads.jpg)

I can't think up a caption.  I think I'm experiencing writers block. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cruisemonkey on May 03, 2015, 04:50:35 AM
That's because you're only 50% blockhead.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Calach Pfeffer on May 03, 2015, 05:15:27 AM
Occulus Ripped - an upcoming actual reality headset
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: A-Train on May 06, 2015, 03:12:59 AM
A response to Andy Samburg's "Di@k In A Box"?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 15, 2015, 01:45:15 PM

(http://i115.photobucket.com/albums/n313/escapedlunatic/SecondHoneymoon/PCorApple.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on August 25, 2015, 09:49:11 AM
I'm still trying to figure out of it's a Mac that runs Windows or a PC that runs Mac. mmmmmmmmmm
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on December 24, 2015, 03:04:11 AM
Merry Christmas!

(http://farm6.staticflickr.com/5247/5315212627_32d9e08aef_z.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 06, 2016, 09:52:50 AM
I think it's time we all learned some baluable lessons.

(http://i115.photobucket.com/albums/n313/escapedlunatic/Signs/Core-Socialist-Balues.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on October 06, 2016, 09:10:05 PM
What is that notice all about EL?
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on October 07, 2016, 06:05:55 AM
VERY roughly:  The view of the old village merges with contemporary scenes.
Traditional and modern merge together.
Culture and spirit do something(?)
Protecting historical heritage cultivates the inner quality of people
Providing the old village with vitality and ?? of contemporary civilization.

Obviously, I need a second wife to aid in translations. ahahahahah
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: cruisemonkey on October 07, 2016, 08:24:54 PM
Obviously, I need a second wife to aid in translations. ahahahahah

Vut vigamy is berbotten.
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on October 07, 2016, 09:40:42 PM
Thanks EL! I get the idea. Don't look for a second wife. bfbfbfbfbf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on December 14, 2016, 03:13:55 AM
And it's that time of year again, so . . .

Merry Christmas!

(http://farm6.staticflickr.com/5247/5315212627_32d9e08aef_z.jpg)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on December 16, 2016, 10:52:47 PM
Thanks EL! Merry Christmas to you and everyone at the Saloon. agagagagag
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on February 01, 2017, 12:49:49 AM
(http://i115.photobucket.com/albums/n313/escapedlunatic/Silly%20Photos/Historic-Dinner-Party.jpg)
(Click image for larger version)
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Granny Mae on February 05, 2017, 09:24:55 PM
What an interesting picture; thanks EL! bfbfbfbfbf
Title: Re: This week's avatar: alternate headings
Post by: Escaped Lunatic on February 06, 2017, 12:21:11 AM
I'm glad you like it.  I spotted it at the Lijiang airport and spent a little time trying to get a half-decent photo of it.

I've researched it some more.  The original is a little wider and is titled Discussing the Divine Comedy with Dante.  Here's an article which talks about some of the people in it and reveals who painted it:

http://www.china.org.cn/culture/2009-03/18/content_17464951.htm