I do not want to sound like a pig. Nor do I wish to belittle anyone. I just am trying to figure out what I can do in order to feel back to myself again.
When I first came to China in 2002, the final move, I had no clue about yellow fever.
Some of you know I was married then divorced here behind the great wall. At least I got over that.
Directly speaking, I have been, as most, spoiled badly by Chinese females. I, being a man of rock and roll, did not mind this, however, in retrospect, it has left me with some very horrible coping skills.
I cannot seem to find a ground on which to stand on. Meaning I am totally commit-a-phobic.
I try my very best to hide myself from those types of girls/women who are out to get me.
I do not want to brag or suggest that Chinese females are bad women. in fact, I think the opposite.
However, the lifestyle of the "average" laowai seems to follow a stereotype of enjoying his life to the fullest with a personal harem.
yea sure for a man this is a good thing however, i found now that at my age of 44 it is just too bothersome.
but on the other hand, I am trying really hard to figure out how to withstand and develop and water my current relationship of 2 years with a very nice fujian girl.
but, in my gut, i can't stand it. I do not know why.
I do not believe it is merely just being in china and the game of switching and new ones are easily attained, but perhaps I am just not the type for commitment.
your input?