Been here three years. All the things that intrigued me have lost their luster and the crap that didn't bother me is under my skin and burrowing. I know an ex-pat goes through a curve where, at first, everything is grand followed by its opposite and then, finally, one comes back to a happy medium. I'm still waiting for that last part to show itself.
Came back a few days ago. Got into that stinking cab, flowed into that monstrously idiotic traffic and, at that moment, would have given up all my teeth, hair and both testicles to be back home. I have no valid complaints. I'm paid well to teach six hours per week to an excellent and respectful group of students. I love the work, receive very high appraisals and the students return the respect and affection. But, what the hell happens to these people once they turn 30? Is a neo-Nazi chip installed in their brain stem? A compulsory re-education camp I'm not aware of? A subconscious, anti-Japanese impulse activated?
I'm sounding like a whiny bitch, (or a Republican), but my gripes, in order of magnitude are:
* The fire-traps the Chinese set for us. Which Nobel Peace Laureate decides to wire shut all but one or two doors of a 13-story teaching complex or a 500-seat gymnasium or every other goddam building that houses human flesh? (I survived a devastating fire so I feel I have the right to complain about this one.)
* That special relationship that drivers and pedestrians have. Yes, I've sped up at yellow lights, but to up-shift and floor it in order to skim past three old ladies with both hands filled with grocery bags in order to gain three milliseconds on your competition? These people should be tied down and forced to watch a Ronald Reagan film festival.
* Parking on sidewalks. It's enough of a challenge just to wade through the above-mentioned traffic to reach the other side of the street, (Only the East Berliners of the late 20th Century faced more obstacles), but to get there only to be forced to walk back into traffic because eight doofuses parked their Camrys on the sidewalk just twists the knife. Thank God I keep a sharp key at the ready or I'd get no catharsis whatsoever.
I'll stop here, but I remember one of my favorite students, who I still keep in touch with, asking me why the hell I would travel all the way to China just to be agitated. I chalked it up to that human tendency to be unappreciative of what's right in front of her, but I'm starting to think I had the whole thing bass-ackwards and the scales were removed from HER eyes and set upon mine. It's getting so bad I'm starting to consider Detroit as an upgrade. And that thought is enough to scare even Dennis Rodman.