Just has my weirdest experience in China...

Walking back from buying some tasty chow mein across the road from my school SilverMay and I see a guy on his knees crying outside a shop, screaming something in Chinese with a crowd of 5-6 people looking at him. As soon as he lays eyes on us he instantly cheers up and walks over to us.

"Welcome to China" he shouts out proudly and then grabs my arm. Back home on the streets of South East London this alone would have been enough to land the guy a slap or two, anyhow, he then starts demanding (in fairly good English) "give me 10 kwai, I am very hungry" - I try to tell him I don't have 10 kwai on me, I spent the last of my money on the meal in my hands "Give me your food then, I am very hungry" I told him I couldn’t do this as I too was hungry. All the time this is going on the guy still has quite a tight grip on my arm, which is starting to wind me up more and more, I end up having to literally drag the guy down the road to my school, hoping someone there could shout at the guy in Chinese and he would f*** off!

Well, this is not what happens at all, everyone in the school just looks if they are about to  their pants, so I soon realise it's just down to me to get this guy away. By this point he's managed to get his finger inside my bracelet and is trying to pull it off (good luck with that buddy, it's pretty think, like you) so I hand SilverMay our lunch so I now have a free hand to prize the little schmuk off my arm. Once this is done he drops to his knees, the water works start again along with the cries of "Money, please give me money" still nobody in the school moves an inch, leaving me to literally drag the guy through the doors. Once he's out everyone starts laughing "Hahahaa what a crazy guy" Hmmmmmm, yeah, crazy he might be but thanks for the helping hand and he was literally clinging onto my arm blatantly trying to steal my jewelry.

Up to this point I'd figured myself to be quite a well liked member of staff here, guess that doesn't count for much with regards to helping someone. Oh well, live and learn I guess.

What really shocked me the most was 1) the fact this guy spoke OK English (certainly better than some of my students  ) 2) The guy was sporting some pretty nice clothes, decent trousers and a leather jacket. Some people eh!

After all that roll on home time could I could really do with some serious  . I am quite pleased with myself that I managed not to clobber the guy though, I have to assume that would have only made the situation a whole lot worse.

That was definitely a weird one!  Your schools reaction sucks, but it's not surprising....at least you're ok and he wasn't 'knife wielding' crazy or anything.

Up to this point I'd figured myself to be quite a well liked member of staff here, guess that doesn't count for much with regards to helping someone. Oh well, live and learn I guess.

I'm sure you are a well liked member of staff there. The lack of help has nothing to do with that. These two things have nothing to do with each other here.

After all that roll on home time could I could really do with some serious  . I am quite pleased with myself that I managed not to clobber the guy though, I have to assume that would have only made the situation a whole lot worse.

Would you have clobbered the guy in your own country?

I'm sure you are a well liked member of staff there. The lack of help has nothing to do with that. These two things have nothing to do with each other here.

Which is a deffinate shame!

Would you have clobbered the guy in your own country?

Once he started yanking on my jewelry, almost certainly. I certainly would not consider myself a 'violent' person either but this sort of behaviour is bang out of order IMO, also those doing this sort of thing in London are normally trying to take your attention away from whatever their real motive is.

I would have popped him one at home too. So I also would have popped him one here. It takes time to get used to cultural differences in behaviour and so at first the default reaction to others is …… nothing. At least nothing too aggressive but remember, different culture or not, you do not have to put up with assault.

The culture of 'mind your own business' is strong here. I suppose if you live in a country of 1.3 billion it's a necessary belief. Another aspect is helping can often turn out bad for the helper.

Too be honest if I was standing there, I wouldn't have helped you either. I would be wondering why you weren't hitting the guy off you and if you were just dragging him around, I would have just watched because i wouldn't have felt you were in any danger. i might have laughed. Now if you were hitting him and he was still grabbing at you, then I'd give you a hand.

Your colleagues may not have known you wanted help.

I don't know "Get off of me" in Chinese, but I can count. I would have called out loudly from 10 to 1 in Chinese, at which point I would have began punching him in the face with my free hand. If he had a lick of sense, he would have figured out what was about to happen in the 10 seconds prior to that and beat it.

By his attire, I'd worry that he's no average beggar, but a compensation-seeker hoping to test you into beating him. You need to learn pressure points. Most Chinese people probably would have handled it by taking an extremely sh1tty tone. For lessons in this, ask any Chinese woman. If you're dragging him all the way down the street, you've let it go too far, as he knows you're not going to do anything.

He may well have been hoping you would take a poke at him and he could then use the law to extort money from you. Taking a few punches in the face isn't so bad if he can then call the police and get a few thousand yuan. It's unlikely that folks in the crowd would testify on your behalf.

That being said, knowing push hands is a lovely skill. I used to play judo, and on two occasions when aggressive "beggars" have grabbed me I've used their own inertia to throw them. It's a quite nice way to do things as to everyone else it looks as if the beggar has somehow tripped and I haven't done a thing.

I like this. Thanks for the idea! I get grabbed at clubs constantly by overly eager middle aged men. Thanks to a year or so of MMA plus other self defence it's usually not a problem, and I can wrangle my way out of a hold BUT a less obvious (and possibly less violent solution) would be nice. Cheers! 

Quote from: El Macho on December 05, 2011, 02:26:07 PM

He may well have been hoping you would take a poke at him and he could then use the law to extort money from you. Taking a few punches in the face isn't so bad if he can then call the police and get a few thousand yuan. It's unlikely that folks in the crowd would testify on your behalf.

That being said, knowing push hands is a lovely skill. I used to play judo, and on two occasions when aggressive "beggars" have grabbed me I've used their own inertia to throw them. It's a quite nice way to do things as to everyone else it looks as if the beggar has somehow tripped and I haven't done a thing.

I like this. Thanks for the idea! I get grabbed at clubs constantly by overly eager middle aged men. Thanks to a year or so of MMA plus other self defence it's usually not a problem, and I can wrangle my way out of a hold BUT a less obvious (and possibly less violent solution) would be nice. Cheers! 

Geez Mkate, I think the best solution is to not put yourself in the position where you are being grabbed! seriously, be careful out there!

That would mean avoiding KTV and pretty much all the bars here.
I'm just waiting for the day when it's timed badly, I've drunk to much and I 
on them instead.

I'm just waiting for the day when it's timed badly, I've drunk to much and I 
on them instead.

Please please please have someone get that on video!

Teaching manners, one at a time.

I had a similar thing happen to me the day after I read the first post in this thread.  I live in an apartment complex next to the school, so I was walking down the streeet.  This guy was walking twords me.  He looked normal, clean clothes, clean cafe and a nice warm coat, but as he approached me he said, rgather loudly, as a few people have as they approach me, "Hello." I responded back then suddenly he replied back, "Give me money!"  I told him I didn't have any money, walked around him and made a beeline for the gate of our complex where we have a guard.  Thankfully the guards know my wife and I. In the past has been very protective of us when beggars and the like, try to follow us wanting a handout. Thankfully, the guy didn't follow me and I made it home.